Cyber Love Story of the Week – Valerie and Adam
“After being burned big time by my last relationship in 2007, I had officially given up dating,” said Valerie. She added, “My friends had been imploring me for years to try online dating, but I just couldn’t get past the stigma of it and was extremely concerned about the safety factor.”
Valerie thought the idea of a ton of strangers perusing her pictures and personal details would freak her out. Finally she joined OkCupid, and as an attractive female was immediately inundated by e-mails. She wasn’t interested in any of them until she received her first e-mail from Adam.
Adam had been home on a Saturday evening looking at some of the newest profiles on OkCupid, a weekly ritual for him. He believed in emailing a woman right away before she became swamped with emails and possibly gave up on online dating.
“Then I spotted this beautiful brunette with the handle ‘fleursetbonbons’. Ah, flowers and candy… so traditional for a woman, isn’t it?” thought Adam. Then when he read Valerie’s profile, he knew she was the type of person he was looking for. “Her profile said a lot about her personality and style and wasn’t just another, I love sushi and long walks on the beach type of diatribe,” Adam added. He didn’t expect Valerie to write back.
Valerie loved the fact that Adam was the first guy she’d seen on the site with the long haired, rock & roll, chiseled features look that she really went for. When she clicked on his pictures, she saw he also had an incredible smile, and was 6’4” tall, which she loved.
“I honestly wasn’t too impressed by his profile…he seemed a little too interested in beer and sports for my taste…but I decided to take a chance anyway based on the cuteness of his pics,” said Valerie. Valerie liked Adam because he was all about being real and there were no games involved.
Adam recalled, “I decided to email her and tell her as much, figuring all along I’ll never hear back.” To his surprise she did respond and they started communicating a lot. On their first date, they went to brunch and he brought her a dozen roses.
Adam and Valerie shared that they have a magnetic attraction to each other that grows every single day. “He’s caring, attentive, and kind to me. I miss him when we’re apart no matter how long we’ve spent together, and I love being in love with him, said Valerie”
“I would never have expected to meet someone that I could fall in love with online, so I encourage anyone who’s hesitant to take the chance…you really just can’t know unless you try,” Valerie added.
Even though the two currently live approximately 30 miles apart, they regularly see each other about 3-4 days per week and are already considering moving in together.
Congratulations to Valerie and Adam, our Cyber Love Story of the Week who wouldn’t let distance get in the way of love.
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Peril of the Week – Too Busy as a Bee
A woman is often attracted to a man based upon his career accomplishments. Men often experience increased self-esteem when they are happy with their career status. When the tables get turned, how do men feel about being lower on the totem pole than a woman’s job?
According to this male online dater, his romance went south fast when he realized he didn’t fit into the busy schedule of his latest date.
The two enjoyed communicating online with instant messages, phone calls, and met quickly within the first few days of contact. Their first date was enjoyable for both. His date revealed that she was a student in medical school along with running her family’s online gift shop. When he asked her if she had time for a romantic relationship with her obligations, she replied with, “I’m busy, but will make the time for a relationship.”
Happy about their first date, he appropriately called her the following day and left a message on her answering machine. The call was not returned. Determined to make contact with her again, he called again several tines in the days following their first and only date. He assumed she wasn’t interested. She did resurface via email and said she was out of town on business and would call later that day. Busy focusing on her career, the phone call never arrived. Finally she called him and said she was too busy to focus on romance and apologized.
The moral of the story is that workaholics may attempt to schedule time for a romantic relationship or date, but often their daily planner isn’t big enough to take the time to find love online.
Do you think she just wasn’t into him? Would you re-prioritize your schedule if you met someone special?
If you have an online dating disaster story to share, we’d like to hear from you. Send your submissions to Cyber Dating Expert/contact and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
Cyber Love Story of the Week – Kristina and Tom
Kristina was on Match.com for about four weeks when she met Tom.
“I had been messaging with a few other guys and met only one other in person. When I received Tom’s first message I just had to respond,” said Kristina.
Tom’s message read something like this:
“Hi, I am looking for a good looking girl who doesn’t talk, has lots of ex-boyfriend drama and only eats salad at dinner. From your picture I see you are good looking and noticed you are a Mets fan, which is a bonus. Let me know if you are interested. If not, good luck in life and stuff. –TOM”
“When I clicked onto his profile his main quote said, “Three Words: NO BACK HAIR.” I have a weakness for cute, funny guys and he had me at that. Then I went on to read his absolutely ridiculous bio which was all made up, but very well written! I was laughing so hard and messaged him back right away,” added Kristina.
Their relationship worked right from the beginning and instantly clicked. The two were engaged nine months from their first date. Tom’s proposal was perfect and sentimental.
“The beach had always played an important role in my family’s life from the time my parents met at Jones Beach in the 1976,” said Kristina.
She added, “My father passed away on July 25, 1996. The year following his death, we held a memorial service for him at the beach where he would fish every weekend. On July 25, 2009, my mom, stepdad, my brother, his girlfriend, Tom and I went to the same beach where my dad fished so we can share the moment with them.”
Little did she know, but Tom had a marriage proposal all planned out and the moment her mom said, “let me get a picture of you two,” that was his cue to get on one knee. Tom began his proposal with, “I know you wanted your family to be here for this moment and I wanted to make sure your dad was a part of it as well.” He then continued to say, “so, do you want to do this?”
Kristina and Tom will be getting married on July 22, 2011—the exact date her parents would have been celebrating their 33rd wedding anniversary.
Congratulations to Kristina and Tom, our Cyber Love Story of the Week couple who found love online on Match.com
Do you have an online dating story to share?
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Peril of the Week – The Valentine’s Breakup
There’s no good time to break up with the woman or man in your life. However, there are some SACRED days that one should respect when it comes to matters of the heart. These days include Christmas, New Year’s, Birthdays, and of course, Valentine’s Day.
Many of us remember when Jessica Simpson got dumped by football star, Tony Romo the day before her birthday bash. Romo didn’t want to be the “Ken” in her “Ken and Barbie” themed party. Well, they’ve both moved on and we’ve moved onto the famous Facebook breakup chart, which spread like wildfire on the Internet last year. We’re now once reminded again that breakups are in a peak period leading up to Valentine’s Day.
And so the story goes in our featured Peril of the Week, where a handsome gentleman had been courting a woman that he met in an online dating site. He said he wanted to pursue a romantic relationship with her. He was smitten. He called her daily, told her she was beautiful, and made plans for future dates. Everything seemed to be going well. He said he wasn’t dating anyone else, so naturally she expected an invitation for Valentine’s Day.
Suddenly, one week before Valentine’s Day, he canceled their plans for the weekend without an excuse. He rescheduled for the following week–the week where you should already know if you are on the calendar for February 14th.
Then came the arrival of the e-mail breakup just a few days before Valentine’s Day. The one where he said, “Let’s be friends.”
The email message said, “As for us; I think we are in the friend zone as I am obviously not the man for you. I’ll spare you all the boilerplate of what a wonderful person you are (although it’s true) but the simple reality is that I am not the man who will be able to provide you with happiness, joy and contentment for the balance of your long and very meaningful life. What you are looking for I cannot provide and I’m sorry I’m unable to do so as I’m very attracted to you.”
Was it a polite pre-Valentine’s breakup? Sure. He could have just disappeared. At the end of the day, he didn’t want her to be his Valentine. Happiness, joy and contentment forever? After a few dates, the word forever should have not been in his vocabulary. Was it the pressure of the Valentine’s date? “It’s not you, it’s me” is old line. She surmised that he found another Valentine and he just wasn’t that into her after all.
If you have an online dating disaster story to share, we’d like to hear from you. Send your submissions to Cyber Dating Expert
Cyber Love Story of the Week – Krystina and John
John had just relocated to Michigan where he bought a new home and started a new job. He didn’t really have time for dating, but still had an online dating profile on CatholicMatch. Curious to see what women were online in his area, he kept his profile active and widened his search to a 500-mile radius.
When John saw Krystina’s profile, he found her to be interesting. He sent Krystina an email to say that he wished she lived closer. He let her know that he wasn’t interested in a long-distance relationship knowing that Krystina lived in Massachusetts. Krystina liked receiving John’s email and sent him a reply, which said, “We will make it work. I will come to you.”
Krsytina kept to her word and did indeed visit John in Michigan. After her second visit to Michigan, Krystina again took the initiative and insisted they take down their profiles and date exclusively. The two created rituals to cope with the long distance relationship including working out at the same time. “Sharing things like these encouraged good behavior in both of us,” John said. These are things we can count on to add stability to our day when we begin a new life together too.”
After 18 months of traveling back and forth and spending a lot of money on airline tickets, John took Krystina to Mass at a shrine near Boston devoted to St. Therese of Lisieux. It was at the shrine that gave her the engagement ring and asked her to marry him. Krystina instantly said yes and together they went to mass as an engaged couple.
Congratulations to Krystina and John, our Cyber Love Story of the Week who wouldn’t let distance get in the way of love.
Do you have an online dating story to share?
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Peril of the Week – A Sneeze Isn’t Just a Sneeze
A woman wrote in to tell her story of how she met her online date at an upscale lounge in Midtown Manhattan.
It was a cold winter evening in the city, the kind that makes your nose run. The two met outside and walked into a very nice establishment, where they sat down and got all settled in.
After some small talk, suddenly her date reached for some napkins and began to blow his nose at the table. When he was done blowing his nose he took his used tissues and just threw them on the floor.
He then turned to his date, as if what he had just done was totally normal and asked, “Would you like anything to drink?”
All she could think was…CHECK PLEASE!!!! Needless to say she never saw him again.
Do you have an online dating story to share? Do you think she should have walked out of the restaurant?
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Photo credit: iStock
Cyber Love Story of the Week – Rosalie and Jeff
After failing to find Mr. Right during her 6-month dating spree on Match.com, Rosalie decided to give online dating one last shot.
When Rosalie received an email from Jeff, who advertised in his online dating profile that “It’s nice to know a cop,” she immediately thought the worst and assumed that police officers beat their wives. Three days later, she agreed to meet Jeff for a drink which started their courtship. After their first date, they began to see each other every other weekend.
Jeff won brownie points after buying Rosalie’s daughter her first designer purse. The following year, Rosalie and Jeff became engaged. The two just celebrated their 6th year anniversary. Together they enjoy quiet evenings at home with their four pint-size dogs.
The happy family can be viewed above, along with Rosalie’s daughter Erika at her recent graduation.
Congratulations to Rosalie and Jeff who prove you shouldn’t make assumptions before putting that date on the calendar.
Peril of the Week – Must Love Bears
Contributed by Nancy Brook
After breaking up with my latest boyfriend four years ago, I decided the best way to stop moping about him was to start dating new men. Internet dating provided the perfect opportunity to start finding someone new.
I had dated online before, and I always had plenty of winks and emails. The problem was I didn’t want to date many of these men. I longed for the whole package—someone near my age, smart, accomplished, handsome, athletic and fun.
When I met Dirk, he seemed perfect. He was cute, smart, funny, easy to talk to and very interested in me. The night before I met Dirk, I had a date with a handsome chiropractor, but I couldn’t keep my attention on him. (Maybe it was the dark glasses he wore throughout our dinner.)
I cut the evening short with the doctor and rose at the crack of dawn the next day to meet Dirk at West Yellowstone, which was a four-hour drive for me. We talked on our cell phones the whole way over. I couldn’t wait to meet him in person! But when I saw him, I was very surprised. He was short, barrel-chested, thick-necked and much less attractive than he appeared on his online photo. I tried to get over the shallow stuff as I did like him on the phone.
“Hi!” he said enthusiastically, and gave me a big hug with his stubby arms. I smiled and hugged him back. We stopped by the grocery store for a picnic lunch of sandwiches and wine and then drove into the park where we ate by a creek, lying on a picnic blanket. After our lunch, he reached over and kissed me.
It was the most horrible kiss I could have imagined. It was a kiss that didn’t end – kind of like a vacuum hose sucking my lips. I wanted to run as far away from Dirk as possible, but I knew that would hurt his feelings. Besides, if I took off, I’d have to run miles since Dirk had driven us into the park and my car was back at the grocery store. Instead, I suggested we see the sites around Yellowstone.
Dirk talked about our future. I could move in with him and help him with his bear hunting business. (Never mind that I despise sport hunting.) There was no need for me to work. He made enough money for both of us. I heard pop Christian music playing in the background as a big grin spread across his face as he fanaticized about our life together.
“I’m ready to go back,” I said.
“Already?” he said.
“Yeah – it’s going to be a long drive back to Billings, and I want to get started.”
A scowl creased his forehead, his mouth turned down around the corner and he didn’t say a word. I stayed on my side of the truck, avoiding any additional contact with him.
When we arrived back at West Yellowstone, I wanted to leap out of his truck and spring to my car. I kept my cool. I opened the door, grabbed my camera bag and smiled at Dirk.
“It was nice to meet you,” I said.
“I get the feeling that I’m never going to see you again,” he said.
“Well, one never knows what the future has in store,” I answered.
I gave him a quick hug and power walked to my vehicle. I got into the car, started it and peeled out, waving as I left. I was free at last.
Lesson learned: It’s better to mope at home about an old boyfriend than be trapped in a pickup with a new crazy bear man.
The Peril of the Week was contributed by Nancy Brook, author of the upcoming book, Cycling, Wine, and Men: A Midlife Tour de France.
From the Cyber-Dating Expert: It’s not a good idea to go anywhere with a man in his car or truck on a first date. It’s a recipe for a dating disaster.
Let us know if you have a story to contribute for our Peril of the Week.
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Cyber Love Story of the Week – Sarah and Nathan
After looking at the MySpace pages of friends of friends of friends, Nathan somehow stumbled upon Sarah’s page. He found her profile banter funny and witty and sent her a message inviting her out for dinner. After viewing Nathan’s (ahem) “colorful” page, Sarah decided that it would be entertaining to spend an evening with an odd character.
They went to a perfectly normal dinner and chatted about perfectly boring things. Sarah was surprised that Nathan’s online demeanor did not translate into a host of quirky personality traits.
At the end of the meal, Sarah said that she’d like a piece of gum. She didn’t have any, though, and there wasn’t a convenience store around. Nathan, thinking quickly on his feet, popped into a retro toy store and proceeded to buy every pack of gum they had. The duo spent the remainder of the evening sitting outside, chewing piece after piece of odd-tasting gums of a different era. Sarah was won over.
Four years later—and still very much in love—the couple consider themselves not only domestic partners, but life partners, as well. It seems that the relationship has had even more sticking power than the gum. Congratulations to Sarah and Nathan, who prove that sometimes love will find you, even when you aren’t looking for it.
Do you have an online dating story to share?
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Peril of the Week – Diaper Dan
While on a “Meet & Greet” i.e. dating ‘interview’ with a man she met online, a woman was asked the following question, “How open-minded are you?”
She responded by telling him that he should feel comfortable telling her anything. However, she wasn’t prepared at all for his response. He then shared with her that he was wearing a diaper.
The woman asked if it was for medical reasons, but he said, ”No.”
As they were taking a walk at the beach and he was the one who was driving, she really couldn’t get out of the date at the time. He was a good looking man and a top executive at his company. Although he was genuinely a nice guy, she simply couldn’t get over this particular quirk of his, so the ‘would be’ relationship actually ended before it even started. It was another dating disaster.
Do you believe we should be on a “need to know basis?” Did she really need to know this? Comments are always welcome.
Let us know if you have a story to contribute for our Peril of the Week.
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