Cyber Love Links – Links to Love, When You’re in the Mood for Love
We’re still in the merry month of May, which has been proclaimed Romance Month. So if you have a digital crush on someone or would like to reconnect with a former college flame, reach out and feel the love.
It’s that time of the week where we take a moment to share the articles on the web and Twitter as well as thank those who have featured Cyber-Dating Expert in their many articles.
First with the gratitude: Thank you to GenConnect and our friend Laurel House, Quickie Chick for the great video interview, How to Create You Love Life Resume. Sure we know you don’t want to look at online dating like a chore or a job, but here are some tips to ramp up your search. Also, a huge thank you to YourTango who collected a group of experts for a 7-Day Love Your Body series. We wish women wouldn’t feel so insecure about their appearance. Men do love the real you, so enjoy our advice in 16 Things You Hate About Your Body That Men Love. The Friends of Ricki community shared our FOX News video on their Facebook page for their relationship Tuesday topic, so stop by and say hello! Our article, To Text or Not to Text: Crazy Dating Texts That Went Viral was shared by everyone who prays they never become that girl or guy.
On Twitter, some of our favorite stories included Huffington Post Weddings: How to Stop Money Problems in Your Marriage Before They Start. Do men think you’ll go to bed with them on the first date if you wear red? I say no. YourTango Experts say yes. Let us know what you think. Our friend Jeannie Assimos at eHarmony Advice posted a great article, Online Dating Wisdom from Hall and Oates. On The Rules of Netiquette, we shared Texting While Walking Will Cost You a Ticket. Better sit on a park bench to let your date know you’re running late. Match just announced their events for singles as well as Beyond the Wink: Games to play online. Let us know what you think.
We’re getting ready to launch the Mobile Dating Bootcamp and next week you’ll meet our contestants!
Our favorite quote of the week came from Sir Paul McCartney: “And, in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make.”
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.
Julie Spira and the Cyber-Dating Expert Team.
For more dating advice, Like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert and join our Weekly Flirt.
To Text, or Not to Text – Crazy Dating Texts That Went Viral
Dating and humor. It can be a winning combination for those looking for love online, and lethal for those who suffer from a texting anxiety complex.
First we saw the single girl with the cat video which spread across the Internet. We laughed, we shared it, and we really didn’t want to be that girl.
Then we found out about Ashton Kutcher’s online dating video, which was a spoof.
Most of us remember spreadsheet guy, who was totally embarrassed that his date and her friends leaked his private excel spreadsheet with comments about each date to the media.
But the saddest of them all are those who suffer from the crazy texting syndrome. Both men and women are not immune from this new epidemic.
A few stories have been spreading online with screen shots of text messages that will make you cringe. Yes, both men and women get obsessed with sending breakup texts or ones begging their dates to see them again.
Those desperate to love and be loved sometimes can’t always control their digital fingers. They call, they text, they email, they beg, become control freaks, breakup, and in the end they make complete fools of themselves for the rest of the world to see. Even if he or she might be interested in a second date or reconciliation, this behavior chases them away in a New York minute.
Gawker reported on the Fedora Lawyer guy in New York who went to the movies to see The Avengers with a movie date who needed to keep the upper digital hand. His date wasn’t that into him, but she behaved properly on the date, didn’t insult him and let him know she had a nice time, but he wasn’t for her. This is more typical than not, as most singles don’t get to a second date.
The Fedora was described as passive-aggressive. He decided to rate his date a 5.5 out of 10 and put her down saying it was her loss.
A few months ago, BuzzFeed shared the story of the girl who slept with the guy on a first date. She subsequently sent over 50 messages in 3 days, both begging him to see her and getting angry with him. All they had was one date. Now she has a permanent digital footprint on the Internet of a drama she probably wished she hadn’t been a participant on.
The point is that we all want to feel love and be loved so badly, that sometimes we act in desperate ways to connect which results in sabotaging any potential with your new crush. Sure we can make fun of these stories. When I wrote The Perils of Cyber-Dating, I wanted to share some humor about my own personal stories that I believed others could relate to. But there comes a time where you need to take the high road, hold your head up and have some dignity and just walk away when it’s over.
Dating is a numbers game. Instant chemistry is rare. When you find it, don’t take it for granted. Don’t play texting games or try to manipulate someone to like you or see you again if the feelings aren’t mutual. Let the relationship move at a healthy course and keep the communications open. If someone politely says they’re busy and can’t get together again, don’t let it become an interrogation or deposition. You don’t want to go down in history as being that crazy guy or girl that no one will want to go out with again.
At the end of the digital day, think before you text. Anything you send digitally can and will be shared. There’s always someone else who will find you to be an incredible addition to his or her life. Sometimes the best things in life are worth waiting for.
Don’t Become a Digital Dating Fool while Dating in a Web 2.0 World.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and cyber-relations expert. She’s the author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating and The Rules of Netiquette. Connect with Julie on Facebook and Twitter. Join in the conversation on the pages for The Rules of Netiquette and Cyber-Dating Expert and share your online dating stories.
How to Know if You’re in Flirtationship Mode
It can happen at any age, but when my friends at HerCampus reached out to me to talk about the flirtation phenomena that was happening on the college campuses everywhere, I wasn’t surprised. Dating and relating in a web 2.0 world is quite simply complicated these days.
We flirt in text messages, on twitter, in emails, and in-real-life.
If you regularly find yourself flirting with a guy friend but for one reason or another, you don’t become an official couple, guess what? Your relationship status can be defined as “In a Flirationship.”
So what is a flirtationship and how do you know if your relationship status is in that in-between phase that won’t move to the next level? A flirtationship is that fun and flirty in-between place of being just friends and without claiming that you’re in a relationship. More often than not, it doesn’t become a romantic relationship. It’s a friendship filled with flirting and sometimes benefits.
When your friends ask you if you and that guy who keeps escorting you to parties are dating, it’s time to take a romantic pause and ask yourself, “How do I feel about my guy pal? Can we become more than just-friends?” If you go to sleep at night with thoughts of him on your mind, it’s time to realize that you’re more than just friends.
For a list of rules on how to behave in a Flirtation relationship, read the full article on Her Campus.
Are you in a Flirtationship? We’d love to hear your story.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and bestselling author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating. For dating advice, sign up for our Weekly Flirt and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
Top 10 Love Quotes for Global Love Day
Did you know that May 1st is International Global Love Day? The Day was created by Harold Becker, founder of The Love Foundation on May 1, 2004 and has been celebrated around the world ever since.
Even in a Web 2.0 world, over 800 avatars have professed their virtual love for each other in Second Life.
In our of our favorite topic of love, the team at Cyber-Dating Expert headquarters voted on our favorite love and romance quotes that we’ve posted on Twitter.
The competition was steep, but we’re happy to share our love quotes list with you and hope that you contribute your favorites in the comments.
1. A kiss makes the heart young again and wipes out the years. ~Rupert Brooke
2. A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love. ~Stendhal
3. At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet. ~Plato
4. Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit. ~Peter Ustinov
5. Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired. ~Robert Frost
6. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. ~Albert Einstein
7. Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love. ~Mother Teresa
8. Life is the flower for which love is the honey. ~Victor Hugo
9. Love is a game that two can play and both win. ~Eva Gabor
10. When I saw you I fell in love, and you smiled because you knew. ~William Shakespeare
Whatever your love stage is, from friendship to infatuation, a crush to a deep love, single, madly in like, taken, or ready to mingle, we hope you enjoy all the love that surrounds you. Return the love in a boomerang and enjoy the day.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.
~Julie Spira and the Cyber-Dating Expert Team
Photo credit: © PeterPunk – Fotolia.com
Cyber Love Links
It’s a beautiful spring weekend and time to share some of our favorite stories about dating, love and romance from around the web and on Twitter with you.
First of all, we’d like to thank Ithaca College for the terrific article in their IC View magazine that is sent out to all alumni. The story, Finding Love Online featured my dating advice and tips for singles on the dating scene. Many thanks to our friends at Sparkology for including us in their Dating Experts column in, “How to Politely Say You’re Not Interested.”
My two cents worth:
More often-than-not, online messages are ignored. Don’t start humming to the Nick Lowe song, “You’ve Got to be Cruel to be Kind” if you decide to respond. Say thank you, but add that you don’t feel you have enough in common to pursue a relationship, or let them know if they’re out of your geographic location or age range.
Of course the hot romantic news of the week was the Friday the 13th announcement of Brad and Angelina’s engagement. There’s no shortage of stories about the ring, but our favorites include CBS News who reports that Brad worked on the engagement ring for a year and Vanity Fair who announced that the famous ring now has an agent.
USA Today interviewed Steve Harvey, author of Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man, which we had featured in our Reading Room. In this article, the cast dished dating advice, both from the film and how they handle love in the real world. Cosmo posted 10 Fun First Date Ideas He’ll Love. Our favorite was sneaking into a matinee. Our friend Natasha Burton posted on Huffington Post Weddings: Should You Follow Your Nose — Not Your Heart–To Find Love. Would you go to a Pheromone Party to find love at first sniff? See what Natasha has to say on the subject.
YourTango reported on Chris Noth’s (aka Mr. Big) Hawaiian wedding bells to his long-time girlfriend Tara Wilson. Yes, there can be happy ending for a 10-year relationship. Sometimes patience is a virtue.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.
The Cyber-Dating Expert Team
Cyber Love Links – Links to Love When You’re in the Mood for Love
We hope you’re enjoying your holiday weekend. It’s time to share our favorite stories shared on Twitter and on our site this week.
A timely post from our friends at YourTango answers the question that mystifies many as to when is the right time to introduce your new GF or BF to your family. Is it the Right Time to Bring Him Home for Easter or Passover? They were kind enough to include our recent video, What is Mobile Dating? at the end of the holiday post.
In her Love & Gratitude column, Rita Watson shared her inspiration on Psychology Today with Come to the Table of Love: An Easter and Passover Tradition.
Our friends at Zoosk announced their new Couples Profiles where you can continue sharing your love milestones on a combined profile. Our favorite Infographic this week comes from FreeDating.co.uk on Dating in a Virtual World. Find out if gentlemen prefer blondes and who falls in love at first sight the most.
Still nervous about online dating? Apparently Sinead O’Connor is looking for love online. Her profile is on Plenty of Fish and we wrote about celebrities who have joined online dating sites. Chemistry.com released their latest Top 10 Cities Survey that was a hot tweet with results that will increase or decrease your passion, depending on where you live.
Over at Glamour.com, we fell in digital love with this story, 10 Stellar Responses to Use the Next Time Some Rude Person Asks, “Why Are You Still Single?
Our favorite Quote of the Day came from BFFTips.com, ”If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t, nothing will make him stay.”
If you missed our Weekly Flirt, you can sign up here.
Wishing you much love and joy in Cyberspace, or wherever you man roam.
~The Cyber-Dating Expert Team
Like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
Weekly Flirt – Online Dating Advice
Just in time for the spring holiday weekend, grab your jelly beans and bikinis and enjoy this issue of the Cyber Dating Expert Weekly Flirt newsletter.
Dating and Love in a Web 2.0 World [infographic]
We love Infographics showing the latest trends in online and social dating and couldn’t wait to share this latest one with you.
Some old standards remain to this day, including 49% of singles look at physical characteristics and 64% are interested in dating someone with common interests, but 27% of women are reporting they’ve been dumped in an email, text, or IM. Guys, where are your digital manners? We’re still happy though that 54% of men have experienced love at first sight, so romance is still alive and well.
Since “Brunette” is the new “black,” we had to point out that 60% of men prefer dark hair over blonde.
Enjoy!
~The Cyber-Dating Expert Team
Dating in a Virtual World by Free Dating.co.uk
For online dating advice, Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
Finding Love Online – Tonya Hall Radio Show
Join online dating expert Julie Spira as she returns to The Tonya Hall Show on KCRN, The Radio Colorado Network on Friday, March 30, 2012. We’ll be talking about social dating, love and romance in a web 2.0 world.
The online dating industry is continuing to grow at rapid speed with thousands of sites to choose from. Julie and Tonya will talk about how to stand out in the crowded digital marketplace and how to embrace mobile dating.
Should you be sending that Facebook friends request to someone you just started dating? Will you talk about searching him or her on Google? Should you send a text message to confirm?
Call in at 855-464-5905 at 8am/pacific time with your questions. We’ll be discussing this and more on The Tonya Hall Show.
Dating Advice: To Friend, or Not to Friend Your Date
It was an honor to be called on by my friends at GalTime to chime in on the dos and don’ts for “Dating in a Facebook World.”
One of the questions I hear most often from singles is, “Should I send a Facebook friends request before our first date?” Sure, I know you’re excited about meeting him, but stop daydreaming about changing your relationship status. You might have taken a digital peek to see how many friends you have in common on Facebook, but once someone accepts or rejects your request, it goes on the same place on the totem pole as having the “talk” to be friends, or “more than friends” with someone. It just becomes uncomfortable and it’s hard to get back on the same digital page.
Suddenly your new beau might be worried that you’ll be spying on his wall. Or even worse, he may project that you’ll turn into a cyber stalker and question him about his female cousin’s arm around him from 6 months ago. The thought of his first date with you suddenly becomes uncomfortable, and he may just cancel with an excuse that it’s his turn to watch the kids, or there’s a work project he has to tend to.
If this sounds familiar, I urge you to take a big digital breath and log off of your Facebook account until your first or even second date is over. Facebook dating can be complicated. Balancing the traditional courtship with information-at-your-fingertips can be tricky. My advice to you, keep the information from that Google search results to yourself and just be the authentic you. You’ll have plenty of time to post things on your Timeline if the relationship goes in the right direction.
Here’s an excerpt on what I shared on GalTime:
No “Friending” on the First Date
It may be terribly tempting to friend request the guy you met at the bar last night—especially if his Facebook page is locked up tight. After all, how else can you spy on those old photos of him and his ex that he hasn’t gotten around to taking down yet?
But Spira says: think before you friend. Chances are, you’re not on the same digital page yet. And a virtual friendship could ruin your chances of a real life relationship. “It’s just too soon and you aren’t in a relationship, nor are you even really dating just yet,” she says. “One of you may be dating several people at a time, while the other may be single-focused. If you become Facebook friends prematurely, your relationship may end quickly as well.”
Or it may never get off the ground at all.
“I’ve known women who have cancelled dates after receiving a Facebook friends request,” she says.
Kiss and Don’t Tell
Want to know every last nauseating detail of your second cousin’s first date? How about your boss’s cutesy pet name for his third wife? Not so much, right? Well, most likely your friends aren’t interested in the nitty gritty of your love life either! So keep it offline.
“Saying I love you on Valentine’s Day is appropriate on your sweetheart’s wall if you’re friends on Facebook,” says Spira. “Saying I love you every day and talking about details of your first kiss on Facebook breaks the rules of netiquette. Your friends and you beau don’t always want you to “Kiss and Tell.’”
That goes for your relationship status as well.
“While your Facebook friends will be happy for your new found love, they really don’t want to watch your status change from ‘Single’ to ‘In a Relationship’ to ‘It’s Complicated’ and back to ‘Single’ again,” says Spira.
What Happens on Facebook…
The date was fun, you had a few drinks, and it seemed like a good idea at the time. But before you post that funny status update or compromising photo—think twice. Remember what goes online stays there… forever.
“You can’t take it back,” Spira says. “Often these updates are indexed by the search engine. Even if you remove a photo or update from your Timeline on Facebook, it may have already been shared by friends and friends-of-friends.”
Click here for the full article on GalTime with my 12 Dos and Don’ts of Dating in a Facebook World.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert, bestselling author, and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, join our Weekly Flirt newsletter and visit us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
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