Cyber Dating Tips for Valentine’s Day
Welcome to February. It’s officially the month of love.
If you are feeling the pressure, don’t fret. Here are some online dating tips to help you get through the month of February.
How many Valentine’s Dates Should You Have?
Valentine’s Day is on a Sunday this year. In addition, Monday is a legal holiday in the U.S. so it becomes a three day weekend for many. Does that mean that you should have three dates on your calendar if you are single?
I happen to believe that three is a lucky number. If you aren’t in an exclusive relationship and your online dating profile is still up, there’s no reason NOT to ask three women out or accept more than one invitation over the course of the weekend.
Your Online Dating Profile
If your online dating profile is still active and you have your date(s) lined up for the weekend, I suggest that you don’t visit your online dating site in the days leading up to Valentine’s. It might take the romance out of your date if he or she notices your activity level.
Dine in, or Dine Out
Make sure you make your dining reservations early. Some of the best restaurants get booked in full in January. If you can’t get a restaurant reservation, dining at home with take-out food on fine china by candlelight makes a nice alternative to expensive dining. If you don’t have time to call around, go to OpenTable.com to see what’s available in your neighborhood and price range.
Valentine’s Gift Giving
When it comes to gift-giving on Valentine’s Day, it can be a bit tricky. Being over extravagant early on in your relationship might scare someone away.
If you are wondering what kind of gift you should give your date, stop by your local Hallmark store and pick up an appropriate card for your Valentine and a box of chocolate. One simple rose for her will make a nice addition to the evening. For the man in your life, stop by Whole Foods and pick up a chocolate lollypop that says, “You’re My Hero” for $4.00. You’ll find them both melting in your arms. If your relationship is new, find a card that is witty and humorous.
If you have moved into an exclusive relationship and want to impress him or her, stop by Tiffany & Co. where they have a selection of Valentine’s Gifts. Their Elsa Peretti® Color by the Yard bracelet in sterling silver with a pink sapphire is priced at $175. They have a full page of gifts for under $100. For him, Engine-turned oval cuff links in sterling silver are priced at $150.
The Morning After
Take advantage of the holiday if you can. If your date involves an overnight stay, having breakfast in bed together will be a nice way to end the weekend, but only if you aren’t book for a lunch date with another suitor.
Still Dateless?
If Valentine’s arrives and you don’t have a date, don’t fret. There’s nothing worse than pretending to enjoy a very expensive evening. During the daytime if you are in Los Angeles, I will be speaking along with Dr. Pat Allen, author of “Getting to I Do” at The Second Sunday Series of An Empowered Woman. For the evening, find another single friend and go to a movie or stay in and read a book. If there are any singles events in your area, sign up and meet other singles. It’s not the end of the world and before you know it, spring fever will be in season.
Julie Spira is known world-wide as The Cyber-Dating Expert. She is the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Visit her at CyberDatingExpert.com
Dating Advice – New Year’s Resolutions. Who Needs Them?
Welcome to 2010. For those who have the tradition of making New Year’s resolutions, I have some dating advice to add to your list.
Bah humbug? No, not really. I met several singles over the holidays who dreaded this time of the year and were looking forward to a new beginning. January is the single largest month for new subscriptions to online dating services. When they discussed their frustrations with online dating, I asked why it wasn’t working for them.
The number one reason was FEAR. Yes fear. Fear has caused many singles to lie about their age to fit into a search. This isn’t new. So, when a 59 year old fairly attractive male told me he said he was 55 in his profile and he wasn’t planning on changing that number, I asked him, “Will you still be 55 when you are 60?” He had to think about the answer.
Most of us look in the mirror and think we look younger than we are. We see photos on Facebook from high school and college friends and they always look older than we do, or at least we think so.
I continued my discussion with the almost 60-year old man. He was concerned that only older women would write to him. Maybe some will. When I convinced him that he didn’t have to go out with every woman who wrote to him, especially those that didn’t fit into his search, he eased up for a minute. When I was positive that he wasn’t going to tell the truth about his age, I asked him how he’d feel if a woman lied about her age and said she was 5-10 years younger. Although it’s a common trend in cyberdating, he said it’s a turn-off to him.
Finally, I asked him to make a New Year’s resolution to update his profile. He was not going to say he was 59 as fear of turning 60 made him panic. He did reluctantly agree to adding a “disclaimer” in his profile saying that he was really 59 but looked and felt much younger and wanted to fit into a search. I asked him to be honest about his age. He said he’d try it. After all, he hadn’t been successful in lying on his online dating profile in the 3 years he has been on multiple Internet dating sites.
It’s a New Year. 2009 was difficult for many with the economic turbulence. The desire for singles to couple-up is at an all time high. Wouldn’t you want someone to be honest with you from the beginning?
Make it your New Year’s resolution to live your life with authenticity –Online, offline, and where ever you may roam.
If you need some help in getting started with your online dating profile, contact us and we’ll help you create that IRRESISTIBLE Profile to help you stand out among the millions of online daters.
Julie Spira is a dating coach and author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Visit her at CyberDatingExpert.com
WNBA Reads Its Own at Book Soup
Join me on Sunday, October 18, 2009 along with 11 other authors for a very special in-store event at Book Soup. Select members of the Women’s National Book Association’s Los Angeles chapter will gather to read excerpts from their published books.
I will be there at 7:00pm, reading portions of my online dating memoir, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online.
Book Soup is located at 8818 Sunset Boulevard, West Hollywood, CA 310-659-3110
Scheduled Authors:
Brenda Adelman, My Brooklyn Hamlet; Diana Aylward,32 Ways To Raise Your Frequency; Jay Balter, Forgiving Nuremberg; Zane Buzby, The Survivor Mitzvah Project; Ruth Klein, De-Stress Diva’s Guide to Life, Time Management for Working Women;Sharmagne Leland-St. John (A Little Hawk), Unsung Songs;Pamela Philips Oland, The Art of Writing Great Lyrics; Paul Ryan, The Art of Comedy; Estherleon Schwartz, Tears of Stone;Joyce Schwarz, The Vision Board; Julie Spira, The Perils of Cyber-Dating; Lisa-Catherine Cohen, your moderator, I’ll Love You Unconditionally, IF…. `
The Love Hypnotist Radio Show
Listen to the Love Hypnotist radio show, where I was a featured guest with Debra Berndt.
We talked about my book, The Peril of Cyber-Dating and shared online dating tips including how soon should you wait before meeting someone you meet in an online dating site.
Cyber-Dating Expert Weekly Flirt
Click here and let the flirting begin>>>
Only Divas Please Radio Show
Listen to the Wealth, Success, and Women radio show, “Only Divas…Please” where I was a recent guest with host De Anne Harris.
We spoke about the benefits of a mastermind program, my background as a serial entrepreneur, and how I started my site Cyber-Dating Expert and successfully launched a best-selling book, The Perils of Cyber-Dating in only seven months!
You will also hear some online dating tips for those thinking of trying Internet dating, and I will share some of my secrets in both business and in the dating world.
To Text or Not to Text – 7 Rules for Online Daters
To Text or Not to Text?
Sending a text message can be a fun and flirty way to communicate with members of the opposite sex. But depending on the nature of your relationship, more often than not, texting can damage your relationship, create hurt feelings, and send your status from “hot” to “permanently deleted” as quickly as it takes to press the send button.
Here are some of my online dating tips as it relates to text messaging someone you are involved with.
1. Running late? Send a text message to let your date know, if you are unable to call instead.
2. In a meeting? Of course you can’t call, so go ahead and quickly send an update of your status if plans have changed.
3. Flirting by text. If you are in a relationship and have discussed the use of text messaging, and just want to let your honey know you are thinking about them, go ahead and send a cute text. “Thinking about U” will always make someone feel good about your relationship, but only if you have continuity and a regular phone and dating schedule.
4. Reconnecting with an old flame? Forget about it. It screams booty call. If your intentions are sincere, please pick up the telephone.
5. I Love You! The first time you tell your sweetie that you love them should always be in person, without alcohol, and while you are fully clothed. The anticipation of those three special words should never be done initially in a text message.
6. Breaking Up. Please give someone the courtesy of ending a relationship in person, or at least via phone. Only a coward would break up with someone in a text message.
7. The Morning After. If your date ends up with a pile of clothing on the floor, please don’t text the woman to say you had a good time. If you truly hope to see her again, call her and tell her how special the evening was. Better yet, if it’s in your budget, send flowers. If you are a woman, don’t text the man to say, “How are you?” It sends a message that you are needy and you may not hear from him again.
Keep in mind that text messaging can end up being a unilateral form of communication. You don’t know for sure if the other party has read your text or not, or if they deliberately chose to delete it.
Julie Spira is the author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Visit her at www.CyberDatingExpert.com
Troops Find Love in War on Web
June 30, 2009 Source: Military.com by Brian Mitchell.
In a recent article on Military.com, I was quoted on trends for those in the service who desire a connection through online dating.
In this article, I stated, “In difficult times, especially scary times when your life is in danger, the fact that you have someone to communicate with gives you a little more hope that you have someone in your corner pulling for you.” “If you know that there’s that special somebody who is thinking about you before you go to sleep, it makes your day.”
Like so many trends impacting service members, Spira stressed the increase in troops finding love online as a natural byproduct of rise in online dating across society.
“With the ease of technology and the decline in the stigma associated with online dating, it seems like everyone is out there trying to connect.” said Spira, citing research showing 40 million people looking for romance – whether searching for a spouse or tryst hunting – on no less that 2500 different web sites.
iDate Update – Highlights from the Internet Dating Conference
The theme was mostly mobile at the summer iDate 2009 – the Internet Dating Conference, the business conference for the online dating industry. It was combined once again with the Social Networking Conference and was held at the SLS Hotel in Beverly Hills.
Highlights and comments include:
- Mobile dating is the new plastic
- Social networking and online dating are now a killer combination as social dating
- Social networking sites are becoming people’s identity on the web
- Instant Messaging is still an important feature
- Virtual Gifts are on the rise: Facebook reported $60 million in sales
Here’s my detailed report.
The online dating industry, which is now estimated to be at a billion dollars a year, is filled with challenges in today’s economy. It’s a business that loses its members when they are either successful in finding love online or they cancel their subscription due to dissatisfaction. The group estimated that 1-2 out of every ten dates were considered successful by its members.
The first day of the conference focused on the mobile dating models led by industry leader Mark Brooks, Publisher of Online Personals Watch. We were treated to a presentation on trends by Google’s John Ploumitsakos, Head of Classifieds & Local Advertising: Online Sales and Operations, and there was a special session on Television & the Dating Industry from Patti Stanger, Millionaire Matchmaker and CEO of the Millionaire’s Club. Patti and I are almost related. It turns out that her cousin married my cousin. It’s a small world, indeed!
I enjoyed the session, “To IM or Not to IM” which reviewed all of the available services suited for Internet dating sites.The evening ended with the MaxPayments cocktail party at the Stone Rose Lounge, graciously hosted by Moss Networks, a Marketing/PR/Events firm. You know this company is filled with creativity as they had special drinks of the evening, including the Moss Martini, the MaxPayment Tini, the iDate Flirtini, the MaxPayments Manhattan, and the Moss Mai Tai.
Day two of the event featured a social networking presentation by Alex Mehr, CEO of Zoosk. Zoosk is the largest social dating app on the net now and was featured in the Cyber-Dating Expert Radio Show on Valentine’s Day. You can check out their service on Facebook, Hi-5, Bebo, and MySpace. They have over 11 million users now!
The highlight of the two day event is always the Final Panel Debate about the state of the industry. The group was challenged to figure out how to become a 5 billion dollar business by the year 2012, instead of the 1.9 billion dollar estimate from a Jupiter Communication’s research study. On hand were Ploumitsakos from Google, Ted Veroni from Jumbuck, Mehr from Zoosk, Marina Glogovac-former CEO of Lavalife, Liz Wasserman from Mate1, and Josh Meyers from People Media-who has 27 niche online dating sites, including the successful BlackPeopleMeet.com.
Some new services included Chemistry-Matching: a user-friendly home test that determines your physical attraction, personality match based on social-psychological compatibility, chemistry match based on a biological compatibility, and an overall match combining personality and chemistry. Also, there is a new service called LetsCallMe.com where you receive calls via web link to prevent revealing your phone number or the number of your cyber-date. The purpose is not to share your phone identity until you have had the chance to meet. The question remains, will online dating users pay for these additional services?
Congratulations to Mark Brooks and Mark Lesnick for once again producing a terrific event for the online dating industry.
Julie Spira is an author, entrepreneur, and cyber-dating expert. She is the author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Visit her at www.CyberDatingExpert.com.
New Online Dating Book: A Great Summer Read!
****MEDIA ALERT****
Just in Time for SUMMER!
Online Dating Book: A Great Summer Read
The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online
“Hilariously Funny! Singles of all ages need to read this book.”
~ Joan Rivers, Comedienne and Best Selling Author
“Julie Spira tells a compelling story, shares intimate moments, and transforms her experience into means of larger good.”
~ Veronica De Laurentiis, Best-selling Author of Rivoglio La Mia Vita
June 22, 2009 Los Angeles, CA Cyber-dating expert, author and radio host, JULIE SPIRA, is available to discuss her recent release, THE PERILS OF CYBER-DATING: CONFESSIONS OF A HOPEFUL ROMANTIC LOOKING FOR LOVE ONLINE (Morgan James Publishing)
Julie Spira will share her stories, lessons, and expertise from her witty tell-all memoir to help your audience find their dream date. It’s wedding season. Always the bridesmaid and never the bride? Not for long if you follow Spira’s expert advice!
ONLINE DATING IS A HOT TOPIC
Over 40 million singles are now dating online. How do you stand out in the crowded playing field and date SAFELY online?
· There are over 90 million singles in the U.S.
· Almost half of the singles in the US have tried online dating
· Online dating is the third largest industry on the web
· Over 2500 online dating sites and the numbers are growing daily
· The desire to couple up has increased with the down turn in the economy
Cyber-Dating Expert, Julie Spira helps singles navigate the web with her Top Ten Rules of Netiquette for online daters in her book.
Learn how she turned her heartbreak into a successful online dating life with over 250 dates and four marriage proposals.
She will reveal:
· How to date SAFELY online
· How to help singles create an IRRESISTIBLE online dating profile
· How to see the RED FLAGS and spot the bad boys.
· The signs of an unavailable man or serial dater
· Her profile definitions on what an online dating profile really means
· How to communicate effectively with the opposite sex
· How to find a date in 30 days or less
Spira has appeared in/on Crain’s New York Business, Fox News Strategy Room, CosmoGirl Radio, BBC Radio, Glamour.com and numerous media outlets as an expert in the field of Online Dating.
To book an interview, please contact Julie@cyberdatingexpert.com 310-433-7786
For more information, visit www.CyberDatingExpert.com
PRAISE FOR THE PERILS OF CYBER-DATING
“It’s like Sex and The City in a Web 2.0 World.”
~ E. Jean Carroll, Columnist, “Ask E. Jean” Elle Magazine
“This book is a must for this generation of singles, both male and female, who are into cyber-dating. It is possible to find someone if you know the rules.”
~ Dane Robert Swanson, Santa Monica Daily Press
“The Perils of Cyber-Dating gives hope to singles everywhere with an email address that they can successfully meet someone online.”
~ Dr. Pat Allen, Author of the best-seller of Getting to “I Do”
“I’ve seen too many women put in jeopardy by unscrupulous Internet dating contacts. That’s why this book is your must-have navigation guide to help you safely travel through the perilous landscape of cyber-dating. Plus, Spira’s personal stories are a hoot and a half!”
~ Diane Dimond, Journalist and Author
“Online dating memberships should come with a handbook and many doses of humor. Julie Spira provides both. A wonderful companion for singles looking for love online.”
~ Julie Ferman, Founder, Cupid’s Coach
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