Countdown to Valentine’s Day – Can You Find a Date Online?
With Valentine’s Day just a month away, singles are thinking about red hearts and online dating sites are seeing record activity.
According to CNN, some online dating sites have surged by up to 350% in the past two months, so singles looking for love online can have more choices to find a date or mate for the holiday season.
So how can you ramp up your search in the next 30 days?
Here are 5 tips that will shorten the search so you can ride into the digital sunset together.
1. Become a Social Dater. If you’re constantly updating your status on Facebook and posting new photos on Instagram, Pinterest, and Flickr, go ahead and share some of those on your online dating profile as well. Toss out the outdated blurry photos, group shots, and the arm hanging over your shoulder and replace them with newer photos that reflect who you are today. Remember to post a caption under the photos and add the date they were taken, so your potential suitors can see there’s truth-in-advertising
2. Don’t Wait, Initiate. I know the “Rules” book says a woman should never ever contact a man, but I disagree with this one. There’s a fine line between chasing a guy and playing hard-to-get. Playing the waiting game won’t fill your date card. Sure if you call a guy all the time, you might be considered needy, but most men are so frustrated with writing to women online who never respond. Your quick introduction email will be refreshing to him. Send a flirt, wink, or a nudge, if you’d like to subtly get his attention. Rate his profile or let him know you’ve viewed it, so he can see you’re interested.
3. Flirt on Facebook. Finding love on the world’s largest social network will expand your search. Facebook reported that 40.5% of their members changed their relationship status in 2012 to “Single,” as compared to 29.2% who changed their status to “In a Relationship.” Check out Facebook chat and see if someone who captures your eye is online and start the conversation. Go ahead an Poke someone and see if it’s returned like a digital boomerang.
4. Log on Daily. If you keep your online dating profile hidden with the fear that you’ll look desperate, the result is you just won’t get found as easily. Change your settings to being visible while logged on, so you can show up higher in a search. Take it one step further and turn on the chat and instant message feature. It’s time to start flirting online.
5. Practice the Magic of 5. If you’d go on a few job interviews every day to find your dream position, shouldn’t you do the same with your personal life? Go ahead and book five dates a week. Sound overwhelming? Not really. Schedule two coffee dates, one lunch date, and two dates for drinks to fill your calendar with potential male suitors. By the weekend, you should have date number two on your calendar. Even if you don’t meet “the one,” you’ll be expanding your social network. I call it casting a wide net. You never know if a party invitation will follow.
Practice these five tips from now until Valentine’s Day and look forward to the possibility of finding love online.
Julie Spira is a top online dating expert, bestselling author and the founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.
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Dating in a Mobile World [video]
What do you get when you match up 8 single daters and 8 mobile dating apps?
Hi, this is Julie Spira and I’ve created Mobile Dating Bootcamp, a social dating experience to help singles find love from the convenience of their mobile phones.
With over 14 million singles using mobile dating apps, we decided to put mobile to the test. Let’s see what the daters had to say.
For more videos, visit MobileDatingBootCamp.com and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
Online Dating in a Klout World – Tawkify Speaks Out
Most singles who I coach on finding love online aren’t aware of Klout, social media reputation, or the marriage of social media and technology.
Perhaps they see their percentages of a Match on OkCupid with their Quiver matches, where a 90+ match is worth responding to.
Often they’re matched up on Chemistry.com with their Builder/Negotiator, Explorer/Director, created by biological anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher.
Most singles just want to find love, with any algorithm they can find.
So what happens when you marry a new dating site, Tawkify, created by Cyber-Dating Expert’s friend and Elle columnist E. Jean Carroll, with social influence site Klout? Talkify is the first dating site to partner with Klout to use the Klout scores as a measurement of allure and as a prediction of falling in love. Curious to hear more?
E. Jean tells Klout, “In a series of blind experiments (the thirty couples we matched were not told we were using their Klout Scores), we’ve found that Klout Scores will predict the brilliance or dullness of match—-and how quickly people will click.”
I have to admit, I do check my Klout score daily and it’s been steady at 61 for a while, where I’m labeled a “Broadcaster.” I now qualify for Tawkify’s “Red Carpet Vip Service.” Does that mean I need to meet someone else who is social media savvy with a 60+ score? Not really as the best relationships I’ve been in are with men who don’t tweet. I’m excited to see how the two will work together and would be curious to see if a Klout personality type of “Broadcaster” will match nicely with a “Thought Leader” or “Celebrity” with an “Observer,” or even “Pundit” with a “Specialist.”
So how does Tawkify work? You fill out a profile, answer ten questions and on Monday night your phone rings with a match. I’m hoping if there’s no match, that they won’t deduct the credit from your account. Prices range from $8 for one match to $1499 for the miracle worker.(with a special New York Times offer of $250.
Another brand that I admire who has partnered with Klout is fashion site Gilt, where you get discounts based upon your Klout score. We’ll be excited to share a Klout love story any day in our Cyber Love Story of the Week.
At the end of the digital day, online dating has finally moved to what I call social dating, and it’s here to stay.
Question: Would you value your date’s Klout score? Would you take a digital peek before deciding to go on a date?
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and social media strategist. She’s the CEO and Editor-in-Chief at CyberDatingExpert.com. As an early adopter of online dating, Julie created her first profile in 1994. Today, she writes irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene and is an expert in mobile dating. For more dating advice, Like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.
Zoosk Encourages Couples to Share Their Romantic Journey
From the first kiss to will you marry me and beyond, our friends at Zoosk are encouraging their success couples to share their romantic milestones and hang around once their relationship has become official.
Redefining themselves as “the romantic network,” they’ve announced a new feature called “Couples Profiles,” where happy couples can create a joint profile to highlight their romantic journey.
Zoosk co-founder Shayan Zadeh and a friend of Cyber-Dating Expert tells us, “Zoosk started by helping singles find a partner to begin their romantic journey. Yet when we helped two people find each other and develop a relationship they left Zoosk and there was no dedicated place online for them to share their romantic journey. Our new Couple Profiles offering provides couples with a place to share their romantic milestones and memories online in a joint profile that can be shared with friends. As we continue to develop Couple Profiles, we have plans to add many more features.”
This makes a lot of sense as Facebook’s timeline also features these important relationship milestones, however not on a single profile.
Watch their video to see the features of “Couples Profiles” and feel free to chime in with your thoughts.
Julie Spira is the leading online dating expert, bestselling author, and CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating and relationship advice, like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert and sign up for our Weekly Flirt Dating advice newsletter. Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.
Finding Love Online – Tonya Hall Radio Show
Join online dating expert Julie Spira as she returns to The Tonya Hall Show on KCRN, The Radio Colorado Network on Friday, March 30, 2012. We’ll be talking about social dating, love and romance in a web 2.0 world.
The online dating industry is continuing to grow at rapid speed with thousands of sites to choose from. Julie and Tonya will talk about how to stand out in the crowded digital marketplace and how to embrace mobile dating.
Should you be sending that Facebook friends request to someone you just started dating? Will you talk about searching him or her on Google? Should you send a text message to confirm?
Call in at 855-464-5905 at 8am/pacific time with your questions. We’ll be discussing this and more on The Tonya Hall Show.
How Digital is Your Love Life?
Online dating doesn’t mean just signing up for a dating site when you’re single any more. It’s a multi-billion dollar industry filled with mobile apps, dating coaches, and helps both singles find love and couples stay together with ongoing dating tips.
In a pre-Valentine’s Love Goes Digital panel hosted by Kevin Winston of Digital LA, online dating experts and sites discussed dating advice, the growing trend of mobile dating, and how to keep your love alive after the knot has been tied.
Grant Langston, head of social media at eHarmony and an employee of the site since before it’s launch in 2000 shared his experience on the changes their site has gone through. In my personal opinion, I think they have one of the best iPad apps around. The site will shortly be rolling out a new feature for your eHarmony timeline that’s similar to a Facebook time-line.
Justin Fredericks, founder of Marriage.com, a video network that curates, produces and promotes videos about wedding, marriage, dating, and relationships talked about the new social networking site Pinterest, as it focuses on women.
Jennifer Kelton from Bad Online Dates talked about her mobile strategy, Bad Date TV, and some niche online dating sites.
I shared with the audience how I created my first online dating profile in 1994 as a charter member of Love@Aol, during the days of the dial-up connection. I penned my stories in my first book, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online and created CyberDatingExpert.com as a place for singles and couples to share their online dating stories. The use of social media on Twitter and Facebook has made a big impact on my brand. I also told singles not to ‘friend’ someone on Facebook before or after a first date. Personally, I think it’s creepy.
The audience was a mixed group of singles, married couples, dating industry executives, love coaches and those who are still looking for love online. We nibbled on chocolate, sipped One Coconut Water, and discussed what you should say or not say in your online dating profile.
At the end of the digital day, most of the audience felt they’d rather keep their love and dating life off of Facebook.
One thing’s for sure. The audience left fully armed with the dos and don’ts of social and online dating in time for Valentine’s Day.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. Follow her @JulieSpira on Twitter. If you loved this post, Like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert for more dating advice.
Science or Luck – The Great Online Dating Debate
By now you’ve probably heard the good news. Online Dating has officially lost its stigma and now ranks second in the U.S. for matchmaking. Whether you’ve met your dream date or spouse by answering 250 questions on eHarmony or answered some intimate questions on OkCupid, one thing’s for sure, online dating is no longer for the socially challenged. It’s here to stay and is now residing primarily on your mobile phone or iPad.
A group of 5 researchers collected data on the subject to be published in the February issue of the Journal for the Association of Psychological Science. These experts claim that these dating algorithms are nonsense. The report claims that online dating encourages a “shopping mentality” and that singles are getting too picky with too many choices. Do you agree? Is it just the luck of the draw, or is there some magic to the proprietary methods Internet dating sites use to keep you engaged and active on their site?
Dating algorithms and scientific matching were a subject of heated panel at the recent Internet Dating Conference in Miami, where Dr. Eli J. Finkel, the study’s lead author and an associate professor of social psychology at Northwestern University, said there was no science behind the algorithms. OkCupid’s CEO and co-founder Sam Yagan and Dr. Pepper Schwartz, professor of sociology at the University of Washington in Seattle, who created the Personality Profiler for online dating site Perfect Match, vehemently disagreed. The sites stood by their list of questions to help singles meet better matches, whether through math or science.
At the end of the digital day, online dating has become social dating, and it’s not going away anytime soon.
How do you feel about personality profiles on Chemistry, Perfect Match, and eHarmony.com? Do you believe you’ll get better matches? Are you finding it hard to commit with too many choices in your inbox?
Your comments are welcome and appreciated.
Julie Spira is an online dating expert and bestselling author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating. Visit her at CyberDatingExpert.com for dating advice and follow Julie on Twitter @JulieSpira and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
Julie Spira, Online Dating Expert to Speak on Valentine’s Love Panel
How digital is your love life? Come to the Digital LA – Love Goes Digital panel on February 13, 2012, where we’ll be talking about online and social dating.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
January 31, 2012 — Los Angeles, CA — Julie Spira, bestselling author of “The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online” and a frequent media guest on the subject of online and social dating will be a featured panelist on the first-ever “Love Goes Digital” panel, hosted by Digital LA on February 13, 2012.
Julie will discuss social dating trends, how she helps singles by creating their online dating profiles, and about how she successfully used social media strategies to help her online dating book become a bestseller.
“For our pre-Valentine’s Day Digital LA – Loves Goes Digital panel, we want to celebrate by getting LA’s experts in online dating and love together, to share tips, trends, and success stories in building dating/love related blogs and businesses,” said Kevin Winston, Digital LA founder. “It’s the first time we know of that local dating and love experts have been gathered on a panel in Los Angeles.”
The event will be held at Hotel Shangri-La in Santa Monica, CA
Tickets can be purchased at digitallalove.eventbrite.com
Full release @1888pressrelease.com
Online Dating Minute – Social Dating and All That Jazzed
The secret to a successful online dating site is a combination of social dating, mobile dating, matching, and a critical mass of members. Jazzed, created by eHarmony appears to be successful at combining all four.
The social dating site announced their official launch today with over 500,000 members and more than 250,000 mobile downloads of their iOS and Android apps.
In an exclusive video interview for the Online Dating Minute, I spoke with Grant Hosford, Senior Director at Jazzed, who shared a behind the scenes look at the dating site, including what inspired eHarmony to create a social dating site, as well as describing some of their features.
In addition, you can connect with Jazzed_Kate, their official Twitter account with over 16,000 followers who provides dating advice and customer service.
Are you ready to start adding your social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter, and Netflix on your profiles? Are you interested in joining a site to expand your social network and meet more friends? Your comments and thoughts are welcome.
Julie Spira is known worldwide as the leading online dating expert. She provides dating and relationship advice on CyberDatingExpert.com, where singles and couples share their online dating stories. Connect with Julie on Twitter @JulieSpira and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
Cyber Love Story of the Week – Tammye and Scott
This week’s Cyber Love Story of the Week is one where I’m proud to share, as I’ve known Tammye for over a year. Find out how an online flirt, initiated by Tammye, followed by her cancelling the date, eventually led to a marriage proposal. Here’s the story of Tammye and Scott.
He Said:
I had been dating online for about a year. If there was no connection, I just moved on. Most profiles and pictures were a lie and I was ready to give up on the entire process. I have never been one to go to bars, so dating online was my only real option. I had put a 25 mile limit on my search radius. Somehow Tammye came up within that search. She sent me a flirt. Tammye was 25.9 miles away, although she was just outside my criteria, I was impressed by her profile. She was articulate and I liked that. I answered the flirt. We set up plans to meet for coffee. Tammye cancelled [I still swear that she said due to a spider bite on her face]. That was my final straw … I was done. I was frustrated with the whole online dating thing, but Tammye and I remained Facebook friends. I watched her posts and the events she attended, she captured my attention. In one of her posts, she mentioned Italian food, I told her about a great spot for real Sicilian lasagna, and Tammye said “All you have to do is ask”. The date was set, June 15th at 6:30pm. She was late, one of my pet peeves. I ordered for her. She texted me when she arrived in the parking lot and I went out to meet her. As I waited to greet her, in my mind I saw her float above the ground, wearing a long white dress [come to find out it was a short black & white polka dot one] it was as if I had known her all my life.
I knew the moment I saw her I had found the one, I proposed on December 30, 2010. She said ‘Yes’ ~ three times. I never want to be without her. We have everything in common. She is my life mate.
She Said:
In December of 2009, out of sheer frustration, I joined an online dating site. I had just set up my Facebook account and one of their sister sites was Zoosk. I was dutiful and filled out the questionnaire, trying to be thorough yet interesting. Just let me say, you have to go through a lot of frogs before you find you find your prince. Having deleted my way through a few dozen or so gentlemen, and I use that term loosely, there was only one man that stood out, Scott. I was very hesitant, but we made plans to meet for coffee. Call it a mid-life crisis, but at the time I was determined to experience all those things that I didn’t have time for or money for in the past. I had recently taken up Kick boxing lessons, and a few days prior to our meeting, I took a punch to the eye. A swollen, black-purple-and-blue eyeball never makes a good first impression, so I cancelled. Scott and I never rescheduled the coffee meet up, however we remained Facebook friends for 6 months. In May of 2010, having found out it was my birthday, Scott invited me to dinner. We made plans to meet once again. This time the date was kept. We have been inseparable ever since. He means absolutely everything to me.
Scott and I just celebrated our one year anniversary; we are engaged and will be wed in March 2012. You really can find love online!
Congratulations to Tammye and Scott, our Cyber Love Story of the Week.
Do you have an online dating story to share?
Julie Spira is the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Visit CyberDatingExpert.com for online dating advice and to share your online dating stories. Follow Julie on twitter @JulieSpira and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert
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