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Valentine’s Survival Guide

It’s Valentine’s week and time once again to publish our annual Cyber Dating Expert Valentine’s Day Survival Guide.  Valentine’s Day falls on a long weekend, so get ready for 3-4 days of like or love and everything red.

At Cyber-Dating Expert HQ we’ve been hard at work putting together everything you need to have the perfect Valentine’s Day weekend.  From date ideas, to gifts that won’t break the bank, and even how to fill your date card in time for Valentine’s weekend.

Without further digital ado, here’s our 2016 Cyber-Dating Expert Survival Guide.

How To Pimp Your Profile for Valentine’s Day

Watch this video to hear Julie share her thoughts on the best online dating profile tips with Andre Senior from ABC 13 News Now.

Valentine’s Gifts for Every Relationship Stage

We know the pressure of Valentine’s is on. You can’t help but notice the red candy boxes everywhere you go. If you’re wondering what to get the new person you just started dating for Valentine’s Day, or perhaps want to get something for your long-time love, gift selection can be confusing, regardless of your relationship status. [Read more]

25 New Valentine’s Day Ideas

From going ice skating with your love to a scavenger hunt filled with fun and loving surprises on the way, or even visiting a brewery together, we’ve got a ton of creative date ideas to impress your date. [Read more]

What to Do on Valentine’s Day When You’re Single

Keep swiping! If you’re single, and on Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, Happn or other mobile dating apps, stay in and see who you can meet through your mobile phone. You never know who you could end up scheduling a date with for the day after Valentine’s Day. [Read more]

Why Valentine’s for Women is Like the Super Bowl for Men

Now that the Super Bowl is over, it’s time for the Super Bowl of Dating. Women wait for Valentine’s Day, with the hope that their special guy will either propose, offer to take his online dating profile down, or say “I love you” for the first time. Women even secretly hope that the guy they are dating might want to change his Facebook status from “Single” to “In a Relationship.” [Read more]

Could Your Valentine Be Just A Click Away? Life After 50 Magazine

Dating over 50? Read our featured article in Life After 50 magazine filled with tips on how to join a dating site, create an irresistible profile, and start filling your date card. [Read article]

10 Valentine’s Day Date Ideas That Won’t Break the Bank

From taking a dance lesson or cooking class, to going to a wine tasting or amusement park, here are 10 ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your significant other that are great for daters on a budget. [Read more]

How To Land a Date for Valentine’s Day

Start searching for love by logging on to dating sites every day leading up to Valentine’s Day and keep swiping right. You can also try attending singles events in your area in the hopes of finding a potential date. More in our article on how to land a date for Valentine’s weekend. [Read more]

Signs Your Relationship Is Ripe For A Valentine’s Day Breakup

We know many relationships don’t go the distance, but a Valentine’s breakup can hurt, big time. Here are some signs that your relationship is headed towards an end. If you’re not feeling the relationship, you’ll stop texting them as much as you usually do. If they feel similar, they’ll do the same. [Read more]

Related: Peril of the Week – The Valentine’s Breakup

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

The Perils of Cyber-DatingNewly released: Our completely revised edition of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Now available as an audio book in Audible and on Kindle. Listen to the magical epilogue with the fairy tale ending to help you believe in love.

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How to Pimp Your Profile for Valentine’s

13 News Now Julie Spira

It’s Valentine’s Week at at ABC in Norfolk VA, they’ve declared it #loveweek.

It was an honor and joy to be interviewed by ABC’s 13 News Now on how to have the best online dating profile.

In our video below, I share the best profile dating tips with reporter Andre Senior including:

  • The catchy screen name
  • Profile word count
  • Photos
  • Captions
  • Truth-in-advertising

Plus I shared a personal story from my book, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online.

Full article at 13 News Now

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for our free Weekly Flirt newsletter filled with dating advice and delivered to your inbox.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been coaching singles on how to find love online for over 20 years. Julie’s a frequent guest in the media with her online dating and mobile dating advice. She ranks as the most influential person in dating and online dating on social media influence site, Klout.

The Perils of Cyber-Dating

Listen to our audio book trailer for the newly revised bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online, now available on Audible, Kindle, and Amazon.

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Khloe Kardashian Joins Online Dating Site OkCupid

Khloe Kardashian OkCupidKhloe Kardashian has turned to the OkCupid mobile dating app to find love.

Celebrities dating online are as common now as your next door neighbor finding love on Match or eHarmony. Everyone from Katy Perry, Lindsay Lohan, Hilary Duff, Britney Spears, James Franco, and Andy Cohen have joined Tinder and other dating apps.

Hollywood Life reports they saw the newly single’s blog  KhloeWithAK.com, where she posted the photo of her dating profile pics on the OkCupid mobile app, after ending her relationship with NBA boyfriend, Houston Rockets’ James Hardin.

On her blog, Khloe said, “Real talk: I’ve never done online dating before, but just for shi*ts and giggles, Malika (her BFF) and I decided to fill one out,” Khloe wrote on her blog.

She added, “It was actually really fun to do, LOL! Get to swiping right, boo-boo!”

How long she’ll stay active on the site is yet to be seen. We tried to find her profile and couldn’t access it by her user name, so it might be hidden, or she might have accessed premium features to determine who could search for her.

Still, it’s refreshing to see her genuine profile. If she didn’t have the famous last name of Kardashian, she could easily appear like the girl next door.

Related: Celebrities Swiping Right for Love

So what does Khloe’s OkCupid profile look like?

Khloe Kardashian OkCupid

Catchy Screen Name

khloewithak

Self Summary

Taking every day as it comes.

The First Thing People Notice About Me

My friend Malika says, “My eyes”

Favorite Books, Movies, Shows, Music, and Food

My favorite book is “The Coldest Winter.” My favorite movie is “Troop Beverly Hills.” My favorite TV show is “Sex and the City.” R&B music is my jam, and I can’t get enough Italian food.

I Spend a Lot of Time Thinking About

My family.

On a Typical Friday Night I Am

Working or hanging out with my nieces and nephews: Penelope, Mason, Reign, Saint and North!

The Most Private Thing I’m Willing to Admit

I always, always have Hot Tamales in my nightstand! I’m actually going to eat some right now.

Related: Britney Spears Joins Other Celebrities on Tinder

Would you swipe right on her dating profile?

Our message to Khloe, we wish you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

The Perils of Cyber-DatingHave you heard the news? Our bestselling book, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online has been completely revised and is available as an audio book on Audible, Amazon, and Kindle.

The audio book has new bonus dating advice, as well as a magical epilogue with a fairy tale ending to make you believe in love.

 

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Valentine’s Gifts for Every Relationship Stage

Is gift giving for Valentine’s always complicated? We know the pressure of Valentine’s is on. You can’t help but notice the red candy boxes everywhere you go.

If you’re wondering what to get the new person you just started dating for Valentine’s Day, or perhaps want to get something for your long-time love, gift selection can be confusing, regardless of your relationship status.

Here’s our Valentine’s gifts cheat sheet for all relationship statuses.

Newly dating – If you’ve only had a few dates and aren’t exclusive yet, bringing her 1 dozen red tulips will brighten her Valentine’s Day. You won’t be splurging for expensive roses or going overboard, but will still have the impact of bringing her flowers. Start her day off by sending her a fun Valentine’s e-card. I’m a big fan of Jib-Jab, where you can customize the card with a photo of yourself or send a video card. Bringing her lingerie sends a message that you’re only looking for sex (who isn’t?), but at this point she should be selecting her her own lingerie. A gift card for a mani/pedi will always be appreciated.

Going Steady – Honeymoon Phase (1-3 months) – If you’ve been dating for a month or two, she’ll be expecting to be your Valentine’s date if geography doesn’t get in the way. At this point, bring her a gift certificate for a massage at her favorite spa, offer to cook her a meal and have in-room-dining and bring flowers.  Other fun items include sending her a box of chocolate covered strawberries, or bringing a bottle of her favorite wine or champagne. This way you can feed each other when it’s time for dessert.

Getting Serious – Imperfect Phase (4-6 months) – By now you’ve become an item. You might have even changed your Facebook relationship status to “In a Relationship” and have a drawer at her place. When you’re headed towards the half-year mark, she’ll want to receive roses from you. There are plenty of great sites online for you to order flowers from, or you can go to your local grocery store to pick up a dozen. When a woman doesn’t get flowers on Valentine’s Day, she starts to wonder if you’re still swooning over her. If you’ve taken a trip away together, bring her a personalized gift such as a silver framed photo of the two of you to memorialize your vacation together.

Totally in Love – Over 6 months  Once you’re headed towards the one-year mark, it’s time to up the ante in the love department. She’s going to want something very personal. If jewelry is in your budget, getting her a sterling silver heart necklace, trinket, or bracelet from Tiffany & Company, may end up on your list. If it’s too pricey, you can order a less expensive one on Amazon to show her that you care. For those of you ready to step it up, but aren’t ready to pop the Q, give her a lovely commitment ring. It will show you have all 10 toes in, without getting engaged or setting a wedding date.

It’s Complicated – The ex and almost ex – If your relationship is winding down or you’ve recently broken up, should you acknowledge someone who you didn’t go the distance with? Studies have shown that 20% of singles actually text an ex on Valentine’s Day. Whatever you do, don’t send mixed messages and send flowers to someone, when you’re in the arms of another. Trust me, it will sting. You can send them a birthday present, congratulate them on their new job, and call them on holidays to say hello. That is acceptable for every holiday, but Valentine’s Day. If you’ve moved on, sending chocolate covered strawberries shouldn’t be on your gift list. The best gift you can give, is the gift of time, so you both can move on.

What will you be giving as a Valentine’s gift this year?

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of Internet dating and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. Julie’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online.

Sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter for dating advice.

 

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Do Politics and Love Hurt or Help Your Relationship

Screen Shot 2016-02-03 at 4.34.24 PMIt’s politics season and if you’re getting ready to watch the debate with your date, or follow it on Twitter, listen and tweet closely as these stats might help you with your dating and love life.

In this year’s  Singles In America study published by Match, it was proven that talking about politics increases your chances of a second date by 91%.

That may be true, if you’re on the same political page, but for some, differing politics can add an explosion to your relationship.

Let’s take a look at how America’s singles feel about politics.

Hilary vs. Trump

politics-infographic-2-HR

Hilary supporters are also more likely to do the following, as compared to Trump supporters.

  • Wait for “the one” (49%)
  • Want children (65%)
  • Discuss politics (70%)
  • Discuss marriage (266%)

What Side are Single Voters On?

Did you know there are over 107 million singles in the United States? Singles make up more than 1/3 of the U.S. adult population and they’re passionate about their politics.

Here’s the breakdown of party identification:

  • 19% Republican
  • 40% Democrat
  • 15% Independent
  • 2% Libertarians
  • 24% have no registered political affiliations

Morals and Values

The #SinglesInAmerica  study found that very few singles are willing to vote for a politician who has committed a crime (12%), had an affair (26%), or been caught in a lie (7%). On the other hand, singles are more willing to vote for a candidate who is single (75%), divorced (64%), or female (78%), and candidates with a successful business background (74%).

Rubio vs. Biden

Singles also weighed in on their romantic feelings about Republican candidate Marco Rubio and our current Vice President, Democrat Joe Biden.

Screen Shot 2016-02-03 at 3.28.12 PM

Those Passionate About Politics, Bring Their Passion to the Bedroom

Just how adventurous are you? While we believe in leaving the boardroom out of the bedroom, this study shows there’s a direct relationship between politics and passion.

Screen Shot 2016-02-03 at 3.28.34 PM

At the end of the day, watch a debate or two, and talk about it with your potential date. You’ll appear like you know what’s happening in the world and will score rating points on his or her date card.

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. For more dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, sign up for our Weekly Flirt and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.

JUST RELEASED: Our 2nd edition of The Perils of Cyber-Dating is now available on Kindle and as an audio book, narrated by the author.

Listen to our book trailer here.

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Did You Know Tinder Has a Secret Desirability Code?

BBC 4 - Tinder DesirabilityGuess what? Tinder, the hottest mobile dating app now has an algorithm to secretly decide if you’re hot, or not.

The story broke when Fast Company’s Austin Carr got a glimpse of his score in a conversation with Tinder’s CEO, Sean Rad.

On BBC Radio 4, I discussed this feature on You & Yours with Winifred Robinson.

The BBC talked to some Tinder users and most weren’t excited to know they were being scored based on their desirability. The majority didn’t want to know their rating.

You can listen to the segment How the Dating App Tinder Calculates Its Desirability Score here. Click on Tinder when the segment opens up to hear our lively discussion.

How does Tinder calculate its desirability score?

Julie: When it comes to the mobile dating algorithms of Tinder, it’s a bit of a big secret. Nobody knows exactly how attractiveness is measured, but what we do know is that it’s based on things such as the amount of right swipes, the amount of mutual matches, and how well you have made your mobile dating profile. If you have a profile that is not filled out, you probably won’t be as desirable as someone who fills out their profile and uses all 6 photos, and actually writes a 2-3-sentence description of who they are and what they’re looking for.

When you say it’s counting right swipes, what’s the significance of the right swipe on Tinder?

Julie: when you swipe right it means “yes, I’m interested in this person” and if the person who is viewing your profile also decides to swipe right because they think you’re attractive, then you have a mutual match and you have the ability to chat with each other in a text-like form until you decide to meet in person.

Men right swipe more often. What are women doing?

Julie: Women are getting bombarded with potential matches and when they see people that don’t look very good, have blurry photos, or saying that they’re just looking to hook up, they’re going to swipe left. They’re very picky. Women will look at the profile and decide if they might want to go on a date with them. Men, on the other hand, are visual. It’s hot or not for them, and they just swipe right on almost anyone just to get a match.

Related: Tinder Update Ignites Gifs and New Flirting Features

Was it a big surprise when the truth emerged that Tinder is also calculating the attractiveness of people on the site?

Julie: I wasn’t surprised at all about Tinder’s new ELO score, that’s what they call it, with their hidden algorithms to determine if somebody is attractive or not. We’ve seen this with many other dating sites, including Ok Cupid, and for Ok Cupid premium members, you can actually see who has a higher rating or a lower rating on the attractiveness scale. So I’m not surprised. What I am surprised about is that it’s a secret for now, but I have a hunch that at some point they’re going to add that as a premium paid service for people that only want to swipe right on people that have a high desirability score.

Is it just an algorithm on Tinder and similar apps that work out how desirable you are? Is there any human input? Does anyone who works for the company look through your description and make a judgment or look at your photographs?

Julie: There are many dating companies that actually review the profiles and the photos before actually approving those. We see sites like Match.com and JDate that have a strict moderation policy where all photos and any changes to the profile have to get approved by a customer service team. So there are some checks and balances in place, but not necessarily on a mobile app like Tinder.

If you think you’re more interesting and attractive than the people you’re being matched up with, is there anything you can do about that?

Julie: I would not want to know. If I’m more attractive than the girl next door, then that’s someone else’s decision. But with this attractiveness level, it’s really an ego boost or an ego bust.

If you use these apps, is there anything you could do to boost your own rating?

Julie: When I work with singles, I actually critique and create Tinder profiles and profiles on other dating sites, I make sure that the 6 photos are really terrific. And the first photo is the first glance – you need to be looking into the camera and smiling. And if you’re a woman, I suggest you wear red because red is proven to be the color of love, romance, and the stop sign. Guys swipe right to more women wearing red. If you’re a guy, write something on your profile. And if you’re looking for something serious, say something in your profile like “not interested in a hookup,” “looking for the real deal.” And, of course, please no selfies in the mirror, and wear a shirt.

Related: Boyfriend is on Tinder, Should I Break Up With Him?

For more information on how to be successful with Tinder and other mobile dating apps, click here.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

Watch our new book trailer for the revised edition of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online.

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Why the Super Bowl for Men is Like Valentine’s for Women

Valentine's Day versus the Super BowlIt’s officially Super Bowl week.

As we count down the days to Super Bowl 50 at Levi Stadium, whether you’re rooting for the Denver Broncos or the Carolina Panthers, one thing is for sure, it’s going to be an emotional and exciting two weeks for both men and women alike.

Women often wonder if men hate Valentine’s Day. Guys really want to know if women are cheering for their favorite team, or are they there just for the half time show.

This year, the Super Bowl and Valentine’s Day are exactly one week apart. Women get a bonus, as Valentine’s is on a three-day holiday weekend. Yes indeed. You can be romantic Friday, February 12th through Monday, February 15th with no excuses.

Valentine’s Day is the Super Bowl of Dating

I’ve gone on record as saying the Valentine’s Day for Women is like the Super Bowl for Men. It’s a double-header, so enjoy the ride. Most guys won’t even make a dinner reservation or ask a girl out until after Super Bowl Sunday. I encourage you not to wait until the last minute to ask your date to be your Valentine.

RELATED: HOW TO LAND A DATE FOR VALENTINE’S DAY

Here’s my side-by-side comparison of the Super Bowl and Valentine’s. 

Super Bowl Sunday is a sacred day for most American men. It’s showtime as most guys count down the days, hours, and even minutes to their favorite television day of the year.

Meanwhile, across the hall, women have their own favorite holiday to think about, Valentine’s Day. With these two major events exactly one week apart, it’s obvious that the Super Bowl for men is revered in the same way as Valentine’s Day is for women. Whether you’re a sports fan or a hopeless romantic, comparing the two will help you understand how important these days are for the opposite sex.

Why do I think the Super Bowl for men is like Valentine’s Day for women?

Quite simply, both men and women put all of their emotional energies into these two bigger-than-life events. Often, a woman doesn’t understand why watching two teams trying to score is so important to her guy. He just can’t miss this game. It’s the end of the season and the two best teams go for the ring.

Guys on the other hand, simply don’t understand that if you’re dating a woman and forget to plan something, just anything, for Valentine’s Day, you probably won’t get a date with her on February 15th, or shortly after. Guys, if you’re playing the field on mobile dating apps or flirting on Tinder, if you don’t ask our your digital crush, you lose. Game over.

Men wait all year for the Super Bowl, this big day in television. Women wait for Valentine’s Day, with the hope that their special guy will either propose, offer to take his online dating profile down, or say I love you for the first time. Women even secretly hope that the guy they are dating might want to change his Facebook status from ‘Single’ to ‘In a Relationship.’ It’s on the digital wish list for women, period.

Are you Prepared for Super Bowl and Valentine’s Day?

Men are very prepared for the Super Bowl. They decide which venue to view the game at and with whom they would like to spend watching the teams battle it out. Women like to be prepared. They will start giving little hints out a month in advance about their favorite romantic restaurant, with the hopes the the guy they are dating will take the cue and book a reservation before their favorite eatery is fully booked.

However in contrast, when a man’s favorite team loses the Super Bowl, he will be disappointed, but will get over it. He’ll know there’s another chance next year and will spend the entire football season rooting for his team. If a woman’s favorite beau or someone she is dating doesn’t ask her out for Valentine’s Day, she won’t get over it.

RELATED: 10 VALENTINE’S DATE IDEAS THAT WON’T BREAK THE BANK

She’ll assume he’s romancing another woman and will know she’s not on the top of his list. Chances are, his shelf life as her “number one guy” will immediately expire. Unless he’s out of town on business or in a long-distance relationship, he won’t get another chance to romance her. No woman wants to be at the bottom of the dating totem pole, especially on Valentine’s Day. Expect to be unfriended, or don’t be surprised if she doesn’t return your phone calls or texts.

So whether you like football or not, love or hate Valentine’s Day, remember to talk to the person you are dating about what these days mean to both of you. If you’re single, use this opportunity to accept all invitations for both the Super Bowl and Valentine’s singles mixers. Even if your team loses and you’re dateless on the 14th, you’ll be casting a wider net and expanding your social circle.

Go ahead and accept that Super Bowl party invitation. If you’re single, you just might find a date in time for Valentine’s as well. It’s a win-win for everyone. If you need help with your profile or online dating advice, we’re here to help.

Related: Social Media Rules for Valentine’s Day

Which team will you be rooting for this Super Bowl?

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. For more dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, sign up for our Weekly Flirt and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.

JUST RELEASED: Our 2nd edition of The Perils of Cyber-Dating is now available on Kindle and as an audio book, narrated by the author.

Listen to our book trailer here.

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Tinder Update Ignites Gifs and New Flirting Features

Flirting on Tinder just got easier. Instead of just swiping right on the mobile app and starting a chat with a potential love interest, their latest update (4.8.1) includes, among other things, access to a GIF library from the popular GIF app, Giphy.

Now, when you can’t think of a way to start a conversation with one of your matches, or don’t want to just say “hey,” you can send a GIF instead.

GIPHY-1

The mobile dating app now offers a diverse selection of GIFs to choose from, and even gives you a search option to find the perfect GIF for your digital crush.

IMG_1058How to Access the GIF Library

  1. Click the GIF button located to the left of the text box (in the exact same spot as the photo insert button in iMessage)
  2. You’ll immediately be shown some of the most popular GIFs.
  3. Search for GIFs by category from pop culture, to music, to a TV show, or even a popular meme.
  4. Click on the GIF and it will instantly be sent. 
  5. You message folder will say, You sent a GIPHY to each match who was a recipient of a GIF.

Before you start sending fun GIFs to your matches, take a deep digital breath before pushing the send button. Once you click on a GIF, it sends instantly without an option to preview it or add a message. You can’t undo the GIF button like you can with their premium rewind feature to take back that last left swipe.

So if you’ve ever been hit with a “Netflix and chill” on Tinder and wanted to delete your match, now you can express exactly how you were feeling while you rolled your eyes holding onto your mobile phone.

IMG_1056
With Tinder’s new update, users can also “like” messages by tapping the heart icon next to the received messages.

Related: Tinder vs. IRL: #OnTinderAtTender Trend

The greatest part of the new Tinder update, is the ability to upload photos from your camera roll instead of being limited to those already on Facebook.

The previous limitations on uploading photos from your camera roll were an attempt to establish authenticity among users and limit the amount of fake or nonexistent people creating profiles on the app.

Another huge addition to the app is the support of 3D Touch and the ability to preview web pages within conversations. You can also use 3D Touch before opening the app too. Much like using 3D Touch on your Messages app to open a recent conversation, you can now use it on Tinder to go straight to a conversation with one of your matches.

What are your thoughts on Tinder’s new updates?

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and is the CEO of CyberDatingExpert.com. Julie and her team create Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more relationship advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt Newsletter.

View our book trailer for The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love OnlineNEWLY REVISED with a magical epilogue and Bonus Audio Dating Advice.

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Tinder vs. IRL: A Digital Peek at #OnTinderAtTinder

Tinder #OnTinderAtTinderRecently, media outlet Someecards asked their readers to submit what they look like in pictures on their Tinder profiles compared to what they look like while browsing Tinder. The striking difference between the two is hilarious as, according to Someecards, the tweets sent in “fully support the stereotype that women on dating sites are mostly cat lady shut-ins.”

The hashtag’s full meaning is “How I look on Tinder” vs. “How I Look at Tinder” to expose the truth behind the photos we select for the mobile dating profile, as compared to how perfect we try to look to guarantee a right swipe on dating apps.

#OnTinderAtTinder Tinder Viral Hashtag

#OnTinderAtTinder went viral and the submissions are still pouring in. We all put forth the best, most swipe-able versions of ourselves online, according to Bustle, and I don’t disagree.

Related: Boyfriend is on Tinder. Should I Break Up With Him

While you work hard to present the best possible pictures of yourself on social media, and especially on dating apps, it’s important to remain genuine and real. Since you can select the best 6 photos from Facebook, and now from your camera roll as well, we’ll leave the swiping frenzy up to you.

Posting any photos online, whether it be on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, or even Tinder, you should take the extra care to look your best. From choosing the right angle and proper lighting to picking the perfect filter (or sometimes multiple filters), you need to constantly make sure you’re putting your best digital foot forward. This new movement of honesty is a gentle reminder to be “just you” on social media, while still poking fun at the striking difference between our online and in-person appearances.

Related: Swipe Regret on Tinder? There’s Help for You

This viral hashtag sheds light on the fact that singles don’t show who they really are online. It also pokes fun at the superficial premise of Tinder.

With over 10 million members, over 9 billion matches and over 16 million swipes per day, now you can see your potential date in real time and decide if the real Tinder pictures are worth swiping right on, or not. Then again, it’s sill the quickest way to fill up your date card for Valentine’s.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and is the CEO of CyberDatingExpert.com. Julie and her team create Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more relationship advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt Newsletter.

View our book trailer for The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online, NEWLY REVISED with a magical epilogue and Bonus Audio Dating Advice.

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Celebrities Swiping Right for Love

Celebs Raya The LeagueWhen Tinder came out with verified profiles in 2015 to eliminate people thinking they ran into the Ryan Gosling instead of a fake, it was helpful for a while, but not exclusive enough for some celebs.

Recently a few apps have launched that are exclusively for celebrities. Much like some of the hottest clubs these celebs go to, these dating apps are private, invite-only apps that put them in touch with other high profile people.

The League Mobile Dating App

One app, The League, which started out in 2014 with a beta launch in San Francisco, invites users based on their LinkedIn profiles and their friend networks. The League uses an advanced screening algorithm to keep their dating pool well balanced and high quality.the league 1

The greatest thing about The League is that it uses your LinkedIn connections and completely hides your profile from your friends, business contacts, and coworkers. Who wouldn’t want a little stealth in their online dating? The app also uses your Facebook account to pull photos, personal information, and interests from your profile to match you more effectively

The downsides are that you’re only given 5 potential matches per day, and if you match with another user and don’t reach out to or respond to that match in 3 weeks, the match expires.

However, there are a couple of great things I noticed that I wish everyday folks on Tinder would get to experience.

Users of The League can set ultra-specific preferences for potential matches, including height, education, and ethnicity, as well as the Tinder-offered gender, age, and distance preferences. Matches can also be sorted into different categories based on how good of a match they are, how recently you matched, and how flaky the user is. Another cool thing about the app is the concierge service they offer to users. Every user gets a concierge to answer any questions they have about the app and to let them know about in-app updates.

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Raya Mobile Dating App

The other celeb-only app, Raya, aka the “Illuminati Tinder,” is an exclusive dating app and networking platform for people in creative industries. Raya launched in spring 2014 and has somehow, unlike The League, stayed totally out of the press until the recent announcement I viewed on Mashable that Amy Schumer met her new beau on Raya.raya 1

Raya is made of up a diverse group of people, but a group that is generally more Internet famous, like vloggers, artists, models, pro skateboarders and dancers, clothing designers, and even YouTube beauty guru. A secretive, anonymous committee admits each member to the app, based in part on their Instagram presence. Like The League, an algorithm that considers a few very key factors evaluates applicants on:

  • Overall Instagram influence,
  • Who recommended the applicant, and
  • How many active Raya members follow the applicant on Instagram

Instagram was the chosen platform for users to log in with because they believe it’s the most creative and expressive social network, which makes sense, considering Raya is designed for creatives.

There are two downsides to Raya. One, it charges users a membership fee, but Raya states on their website that it’s purely to “keep the lights on” and to eliminate advertisements that would cheapen the Raya experience. The other is, you’ll probably end up on their wait-list.

Celebrities on Tinder

As cool as these exclusive apps are, you still might find a celeb or two while you’re swiping through Tinder, or you’ve watched Jimmy Fallon’s frequent segments on Tinder for celebrities. A few celebs, like Hilary Duff and Britney Spears, have been spotted on Tinder. Duff even turned her Tinder experience into a music video for her song “Sparks,” off her 2015 album, Breathe In. Breathe Out, her first release in over 7 years. Mariah Carey also took to dating sites the rest of us use to promote her music as well by creating a profile and debuting the video to her break-up song, “Infinity,” on the site. Other artists, such as Ed Sheeran, were offered verified profiles, but the singer/songwriter turned it down, claiming he didn’t have time to be going on a lot of dates and that he’d rather spend his time talking about his music.

Dating pools on both The League and Raya are still relatively small since they’re so selective, so you may have better luck on apps available to non-celebs. It may take you a while to actually find an A-lister on an app like Tinder, but they’re out there, so keep swiping!

Let us help you find your dream date with SwipingRight

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s been helping singles find love online for over 20 years with her Irresistible Coaching programs.

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