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Watch Match: The Musical for a Smile

Match the Musical

I’ve always said that music can be an important part of your online dating profile and our friends at Match agree.

I’ve encouraged singles to include their favorite bands, use song lyrics for screen names, or list the upcoming concerts they’re scheduled to attend.

Many dating apps give you the ability to link your spotify account to your profile to see if you have similar musical taste, which is a great ice breaker.

Taking it a step further, Match created this fun musical video about a couple who met online and are excited about their new found relationship. The two are in serious crush mode and it will make you smile.

Watch this video of Match: The Musical

You just might find yourself humming along and clicking the replay button and logging on more often to find that same type of connection.

RELATED: How Music Can Improve Your Dating Profile

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and an award-winning dating coach. As an early adopter of Internet dating, she’s been coaching singles on finding love online for almost 25 years.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram

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OkCupid Ditches Who’s Viewed You Feature

OkCupid

After a bunch of beta testing, our friends at OkCupid have decided to remove the feature of who’s viewed your profile, thereby enabling all members to browse anonymously on their online dating site and mobile app.

Previously part of the A-List premium paid features, now all members can browse, um, stalk their favorite profiles while they proactively can now like and comment on photos.
In the OkCupid blog, they give the following reason for these changes.

Likes & Messages Are the Truest Indicators of Interest

“Likes and messages are much clearer indicators of someone’s interest. And in dating, clearer is better. If someone messages you, for example. That means that someone wants to get to know you better. Or someone likes you. We take that as a clear sign that they’re interested in you. If you’ve also liked that person, you’ll both be able to see that you’ve mutually liked each other — even if neither of you have A-List — and you’ll get that signal of interest directly”

How Invisible Browsing Now Works

Without being able to view who visited your profile, you won’t know until they tacke action and message or like your profile and/or photos. 

The reason for this change, is the site is strongly encouraging you to message someone, rather than taking a peek and deciding later.

OkCupid claims that men who send a first message between 40 and 90 characters have the highest chances of a reply, and women who make the first move are 17% more likely to end up on a date than those who don’t.

So when we say word count and character count matters, it’s now backed up by their research.

Are you ready to put ten toes in and make the first move?

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and an award-winning dating coach. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and had been helping singles find love online for over 20 years.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter and SIGN UP for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

 

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SURVEY: The #1 Way to Be More Romantic

Top Romantic Gestures

Wondering if you’re super romantic or not?

In honor of National Romance Awareness month, held every August, our friends at Match shared their Singles in America Survey, ranking what singles believe to be the most romantic gestures.

Before you open your wallet for jewelry, unless it’s for an engagement ring, the survey showed that the top most romantic thing you can do is to take care of your partner when they are sick. (87%)

I’ll always remember the guy who once put together a get well care package when I was under the weather. He included chicken soup, food for the week, a candle, a cute card, throat spray, and vitamin C, all wrapped in a big bow.

So if you’re sweetie is under the weather, offer to take him or her to the doctor, pick up some remedies and be their rock for when they are ready to roll.

A former boyfriend, who now is my male BFF has me on the pedestal, because I took care of him during his knee surgery. I went to the hospital, stayed with him until they rolled him into the surgery room, called all of his contacts when he came out of surgery, and spent the night in the hospital and camped out at his place, feeding him and helping him walk again.

It brought us closer and gave us a bond that we will never forget.

RELATED: 21 Ways to Celebrate National Romance Month

The other top romantic gestures from the survey include:

2. Attending a family outing together as a Couple (83%)

Not every couples wants to be Facebook official, but when your SO brings you to the family reunion or a wedding, the message is clear. You’re important enough to blend in with his or her family.

3. Mentioning Your Significant Other to Your Friends (82%)

While you don’t need to kiss-and-tell about everything you do, when you can’t wait to tell your BFF or coffee group about the new guy or girl to your friends, your letting them know this one’s special and isn’t in rotation.

4. Vacationing Together (79%)

If you’ve passed the first three, it’s time to take the big vacation test. Before you grab your passport, schedule a weekend away of 1-2 nights, learn how to roll with any scheduled changes, and see if you can handle sharing the same bathroom together. Passing this test is a good sign for your relationship.

RELATED: How to Survive Your First Romantic Trip Together

5. Mentioning Your Significant Other to Your Parents (76%)

We know that you get nagged about what’s new with the new person you’re dating. Your parents just want you to be happy, but when you feel great about your relationship, both of you will want to brag about your partner to your parents, and they’ll be over the moon with joy to hear things are going well.

Wishing you much love and joy during National Romance Month.

Follow Online Dating Expert Julie Spira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook

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Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s an award-winning dating coach and love expert who has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years.

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The Lonely Italian – Online Dating Movie

The Lonely Italian
We’re getting ready for the BIG SCREEN!

On August 15th, the film, The Lonely Italian will be released.

It’s a hilarious movie, and I’m honored to announce that I was one of the star’s dating experts! As a dating coach, I help the lonely Italian Domenico Nesci navigate the waters of online dating and mobile dating apps. You name it, he’s tried it!

The film has already won one festival award for Best Film-USA in the Ferrara Film Festival.

From JDate to Tinder, 420 Dating to Fitness Singles, Dominco leaves no dating opportunity off the table.

Here’s the film trailer and it will have you ROTFL.

Stay tuned for details on where the film will be released, or how you can download the film digitally on your tablet or TV.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s an award-winning dating coach and CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert, where she’s been helping singles find love online for over 20 years.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram

SIGN UP for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter for dating advice.

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20 Ways to Celebrate National Romance Month

National Romance Month

It’s National Romance Awareness Month.  Although love and romance should be a part of your regular regime while dating, in a relationship, or marriage, it’s a great reminder to keep the spark alive in your relationship.

The Match Singles in America Study showed that 68% of single men want to find love this year, so love is in the air, on your mobile phones, and could easily fall into your lap this summer.

To celebrate National Romance month, here are 20 romantic things to do for your date, so they’ll be thinking about you all day long, while waiting to see you on date night.

20 ways to ramp up the romance

Newly Dating or Playing the Field

As one who spends a lot of time helping singles with their mobile dating and online dating profiles, I can’t help but stress that logging on and swiping right are one of the simplest ways to think about romance and relationships.

  • When you log in daily, take extra time to compliment someone on his or her smile, eyes, or outfit.
  • Always use their first name if you know it in messages or texts. 
  • Reply promptly to messages to keep the momentum going.

You’ll be surprised how quickly the boomerang effect will take place. You’ll feel like romance is just a click away.

Send Flirty Texts

I’m a huge fan of sending romantic text messages leading up to your date.

  • Send a fun and flirty morning text message to let your date or significant other know that you’re excited about your date.
  • Tell the person you’re dating that they’re your hero.
  • Say you’re the luckiest person in the world to have met him or her.
  • Add a few xoxo’s at the end of your messages to show affection.

Read: 20 Flirty Text Messages to Capture His Heart

Leave a Hand-Written Love Note

While I love the flirty texts, there’s something extra personal about receiving a hand-written note or card.

  • Leave a surprise love note on their pillow or in the bathroom drawer for the object of your affection.
  • Send a card in the mail with a stamp on it and let your sweetheart know what you mean to them.
  • Remember to say ‘I love you.”

The best part is, it’s a keepsake and can be looked at during the days and nights in between your next date.

Smile and be Confident

Believe it or not, you actually feel happier and more confident even when you’re smiling while even talking on the telephone or texting.  But when you’re out-and-about, wear that smile proudly in public.

  • Nobody can imagine romance with a “Debbie” or “Donnie Downer,” so smile at the grocery store
  • Smile while standing in line at the bank or waiting for your turn at the ATM, or in an exercise class.

You’ll come across as happier and don’t be surprised if a few heads turn.

First Date Rules – Be Proactive for Romance

Being passive on a date doesn’t help you in the romance department. Sure you don’t want to be too aggressive, but a survey from dating site Zoosk showed the squeaky wheel gets the romance deal.

  • The survey said 34% of singles finding it most romantic when their date plans a surprise activity for their first date
  • 27% liking to hold hands on the first date
  • 25% actually enjoying it when their date leans in for that first memorable kiss.

Schedule Date Nights

If you already have a steady loved one, you know how often relationships can end up in a rut after the first three months. When the honeymoon period starts to wane, if you’re not dating your mate and creating romantic memories, it’s easy for the relationship to fizzle out.

  • Pick the same day each week for “date night” and take turns selecting your date spot.
  • You don’t have to break the bank, especially during Romance Awareness Month, as there are plenty of free concerts, where you can bring a picnic basket to.
  • Take that beach walk that is listed in your dating profile. Being barefoot on the beach with your toes in the sand, or building a sandcastle is still an ultimate romantic date.

Read: 5 Ways to Create a Great Date Night

Introduce Your Date to Friends and Family

Do you want to show your love? Go out in public hand-in-hand with your partner and show some PDA.

  • Take him or her to a family outing
  • Plan a romantic weekend away and post photos as a couple
  • Watch a romantic comedy or binge watch your favorite shows for a Netflix-and-Chill night.

What romantic rituals help you in your relationship?

Julie Spira is America’s Top Mobile and Online Dating Expert. She’s the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert. She’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online and has been creating Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene for over two decades.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

Sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter for dating advice.

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Match Poll Shows Men and Women Agree on Wearing Red on a Date

Red Hot

Date Outfits - Cyber Dating Expert

I’ve always said single women should wear red on a date and on their online dating profile primary photos.

It’s not just because red is my favorite color, but research from the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology at the University of Rochester also proved that women who wore red on their online dating profiles received more emails from men, went on more dates, and the men actually spent more money on women wearing red.

We know that red is the color of love, passion, and the stop sign. But red is that winning color both in the boardroom and the bedroom.

To add to that theory, our  friends at Match partnered with Finery and polled 2500 singles to determine the best date outfits and the worst date outfits.

BEST DATE OUTFITS AS SELECTED BY MEN

The winner by both was clearly a simple sophisticated and casual mid-length red dress, paired with a classic clutch, heels, and fun earrings. The look was called “Red Hot,” and I have to agree on the choice. So for those who think you should wear a mini-dress, or plunging cleavage, think again. 

The second pick by the guys was called “Sweet and Flirty,” which is a good summer look. Off the shoulder tops are all the rage now, and wearing hot pink is as close to wearing red as you can find.

Sweet and Flirty

Sweet and Flirty date outfit

When it comes to first date outfits, or any date for that matter, where what makes you feel comfortable, flirty, and happy. Dressing in grunge, sweats, or uggs, are good for hanging out at home, but they’re a turn-off for a guy. Dressing for women who will notice the brands will just bleed  your wallet. A guy wants to see you wearing something feminine and form fitting.

WORST DATE OUTFITS AS SELECTED BY MEN

As far as the worst date outfits, the men gave a thumbs down to outfits with minimal effort, ones that were too trendy, mis-matched, Woodstock glam, and striped with a pop of color.

Here were the top 2 losers according to the Match and Finery poll

Minimal Effort

men's worst date outfits

Trend Overload

Men's Worst Dating Outfits

Former E! News Correspondent, blogger and stylist, Alicia Quarles, commented on the fashion survey and said,

“Our poll results don’t exactly prove that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, we actually found that both genders agreed on the best date look, and that men don’t care about the latest trends or high fashion.” Quarles continues to say, “They want to see a woman’s figure—and less women dressing for other women on a first date (i.e., in very fashionable outfits which are on trend, but that don’t necessarily show off everything). Through this, we’ve realized that men just want to determine all lines of attraction on a first date, including physical attraction, so outfits that don’t show a woman’s shape can potentially complicate things.”

So does it matter what you wear on a date? Absolutely. You have that split second to make a first impression and I think the choices selected by men and women are feminine and memorable, both online and IRL.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of Internet dating and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 23 years. Find out how our Irresistible Profiles will help you find your dream date.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter and SIGN UP for the FREE Weekly Flirt Newsletter

 

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Dating Advice – 5 Ways to Heal When Your Ex Moves On

Celebrity relationships were all the buzz this week. As the guest dating expert on “Access Hollywood Live,” I joined Natalie Morales and Kit Hoover to talk about dating, love, Jay-Zee big confession about his marriage to Beyonce, and Ben Affleck’s public appearances with his new girlfriend, SNL producer Lindsay Shookus.

RELATED: Ben Affleck and Lindsay Shookus – Dating Expert Julie Spira Weighs In

With Affleck showing off his new relationship status, the question was asked, “what do you do when your ex moves on?”

Since just about everyone can relate to a heartbreak, we did a deep dive on how Hollywood celebs, or the girl next door should cope post-breakup when your ex finds a new girlfriend.

Here are the 5 tips I shared with Access Hollywood Live

1. Do a Digital Detox

Julie Spira - Access Hollywood

“The first tip is do what I call a digital detox. Even if you’ve said, ‘Okay, we’re going to stay friends when you break up,’ it’s really hard to just move into that friend zone. What happens is you start to become a stalker and you just can’t help yourself. So don’t do that. Block them and unfriend them on Facebook. You can always become friends again once the dust has settled and you both have moved on. Staring at other the other people at you and your sweetheart’s favorite restaurant that you used to go to for your anniversary is just something that is going to sting.”

2. Don’t Compare and Contrast

via GIPHY

“It’s so easy to fall into that trap of comparing yourself to the new girl. You may ask yourself, is she prettier? Does she have nicer clothes? Is she better in bed? Is she smarter? Is she sexier? You get into this trap, and it’s really bad because what happens is, your brain starts to trick you into thinking that comparing yourself to this person is natural. You need to your own individuality. You don’t really know that she’s good at anything other than being the next girl.”

3. Practice Self Love

via GIPHY

“Self-love really is number one. One of these tips that I use with the singles that I coach is if you’re going through a break-up, get dressed up, looked good, stand in front of your mirror and say, ‘You are the the prize,’ and repeat it, ‘You are the prize.’ Eventually, you will believe it. The more that you can love yourself and go out and do good things for yourself, like workout more, maybe lose that weight you want to, take up a yoga class, or take up a new hobby, the more you will become more dateable.”

4. Avoid the Rebound Relationship

via GIPHY

“We see more rebound relationships with men than with women. Women tend to hang out with their girlfriends and, of course, talk about their ex. Just because he might have moved on in a split second doesn’t mean that you need to do the same. I really feel that– having a replacement boyfriend immediately, can often backfire. It might not be a good fit for you, and then you’ve got to get over two break-ups.”

5. Get Out and Live Life!

Julie Spira - Access Hollywood

“I always say that take that covers off your head. Think about the books and magazines that might have been stacking up and start reading them. Maybe go under a palm tree and read a magazine, or if you actually once thought you might want to write a book, start penning that book and writing down your thoughts. Journal about your break-up because the more you read and write it, the more healing it is. Remember, there’s a reason that you broke up and that this person is now your ex. I always say, “Knock him off that pedestal right now.”

RELATED: Jay-Z and Beyonce – Dating Expert Julie Spira Weighs In

Julie Spira is a celebrity dating coach, relationship expert and online dating expert. She’s the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles for over 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles programs.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter

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Jay-Z and Beyoncé – Dating Expert Julie Spira Weighs In

Access Hollywood Live - Julie Spira

Jay-Z and Beyoncé. The perfect Hollywood romance, or is it?  We love to watch love in Hollywood unfold, feel betrayed when there’s a bump in the road, and watch with enthusiastic eyes when there appears to be a Hollywood Happily-Ever-After story.

On Access Hollywood Live, this story aired and as a dating and relationship expert, I was asked to join hosts Natalie Morales and Kit Hoover to talk about their relationship.

Jay-Z dropped a bomb in his mini-documentary

Jay-Z made a big confession in a mini-documentary for his new album, 4:44, and said his relationship with Beyoncé wasn’t based on truth. In a video played on Access Hollywood Live, this is what Jay-Z said:

Jay-Z: “I just ran into this place and we built this big beautiful mansion of relationship. I mean, that wasn’t totally built on 100% truth, and then it start cracking, and then things start happening that the public can see. You know what I’m saying? And then we had to go to a point it’d be like, “Okay, tear this down and let’s start from the beginning.” By far, and I’m telling you, it was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”

When asked what I thought about it and if a couple could get over infidelity, I explained, 

“Every relationship takes a lot of work, but when you’re in the public eye and you’re a celebrity, people look for the little cracks in relationship. They look to see if something is wrong. Now, we’ve got a confession – and a very public confession. It’s going to take a while to rebuild, and both parties seem to want to rebuild this relationship. Again, this confession is very public. It will sting, it will sting for a while.”

When asked if Jay-Z’s public admission would make her or women in general, forgive quicker, I replied with:

“Forgiveness is something that we all need to practice. It’s just a question of building trust. Really, we’re building that trust.”

Beyonce and Jay-Z
By the end of the week, Beyoncé posted a photo of her twins for the first time on Instagram. Yes, Hollywood couples go through big public bumps in the road and we hope for nothing but happiness for Jay-Z, Beyoncé, and their family.

Next up, we chatted about Ben Affleck’s new public romance with SNL producer Lindsay Shookus, after the couple appeared together regularly in New York and Los Angeles.

Julie Spira is a celebrity dating coach, relationship expert, and online dating expert. She’s the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles for over 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles programs.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter

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Ben Affleck and Lindsay Shookus – Dating Expert Julie Spira Weighs In

Ben Affleck Romance - Julie Spira Weighs inHeartthrob Ben Affleck has moved on, so how should Jennifer Garner feel about it?

Access Hollywood Live has been following the story of Ben Affleck’s new romance with SNL producer Lyndsay Shookus, and I was asked to weigh in on their public appearance

ACL hosts Natalie Morales and Kit Hoover asked me if if was too soon for the couple to become official.  After all, Jen and Ben only filed for divorce three months earlier.

Will Ben Affleck’s New Relationship Last?

While I don’t have the crystal ball and everyone deserves to find love and happiness after a divorce or a split, it’s too soon to know whether it will last. The couple appears to be happy and in the honeymoon phase of their relationship.

The reality is, men do typically move on more quickly then women. Men often overlap and go from relationship-to-relationship, often grabbing onto a rebound relationship quickly, while women tend to mourn and take the time to grieve the ending of a romance that didn’t go the distance.

As told to Access Hollywood Live,

“That doesn’t mean the new relationship will last forever. It really doesn’t even mean your ex has upgraded. It just means they’ve found a replacement person, for now.”

So how does someone go on (like Jennifer Garner), when you see your ex in a new relationship? In Jennifer’s case, it’s very public, however these days, everyone’s relationship statuses are public because of social media. The world wide web is filled with social media celebrities who chat IRL with Hollywood celebs in a digital world.

Page Six reports that Garner isn’t too happy with the news of Affleck’s romance. The new couple have been seen all smiles in Los Angeles.

I told Access Hollywood Live,

“Even if your sweetheart is on vacation thousands of miles away, you’re going to see it online or on Facebook, and you’re going to think, ‘My gosh, it’s happening right in my living room.’ It really does sting when you see it so publicly.”

RELATED:  5 Ways to Cope When Your Ex Starts to Date

Julie Spira is a celebrity dating coach, relationship expert, and online dating expert. She’s the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles for over 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles programs.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter

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Pucker Up – It’s National Kissing Day

5 Ways to Create a Great Date Night - Cyber Dating ExpertPucker up! It’s National Kissing Day, so if you’re still on a high from Fourth of July fireworks, there’s no need to let the flame sizzle.

Every year on July 6th, singles and couples will have a good excuse to become more romantic and flirty for this annual holiday. It’s time to get creative, both on the lips and in the desired location of that memorable kiss.

In honor of International Kissing Day, our friends at online dating site Match have partnered up with Colour Pop with a “Kiss + Tell” Survey, which showed that 84% of singles really enjoy kissing, with most experiencing their first kiss between the age of 13 – 16.

Other kissing survey results include:

Ideal Kiss

The TOP 3 spots to be kissed?

  • At sunset (48%)
  • Moonlight stroll (46%)
  • The beach (37%)

How long is the perfect kiss?

  • 20 % of singles agreed that 10 seconds is the amount of time for the ideal kiss.
  • 70% of singles say BAD BREATH has definitely ruined a kiss.
  • 70% of singles say a bad first kiss is NOT a deal breaker.
  • 75% of single women and 53% of single men say they CLOSE their eyes during a kiss.
  • The second most romantic place to be kissed is on the neck.

Lipstick Rules!

  • Nearly 1/3 (30%) of single women say they’ve actually had more success landing a first kiss while wearing lipstick!
  • Nearly 1/3 (30%) of single men say a great make out is when they have a woman’s lipstick on their face.

Celebrity Kisses
Women:

  • Kanye vs. Drake: DRAKE (86%)
  • President Trump vs. Former President Obama: OBAMA (82%)
  • Prince William vs. Prince Harry: HARRY (64%)
  • Chris Hemsworth vs. Liam Hemsworth: LIAM (58%)
  • Dev Patel vs. Aziz Ansari: DEV (58%)
  • Ryan Reynolds vs. Ryan Gosling: REYNOLDS (52%)
  • Brad Pitt vs. George Clooney: BRAD (51%)

Men:

  • Taylor Swift vs. Miley Cyrus: TAYLOR (82%)
  • Gigi Hadid vs. Bella Hadid: GIGI (60%)
  • Jessica Alba vs. Jessica Biel: ALBA (60%)
  • Kim Kardashian vs. Khloe Kardashian: KHLOE (55%)
  • Beyonce vs. Rihanna: RIHANNA (55%)
  • Emma Watson vs. Emma Stone: STONE (51%)

Top 3 TV show hosts singles would want to kiss:

Women:

  1. Jimmy Fallon (28%)
  2.  Ryan Seacrest (22%)
  3. Trevor Noah (18%)

Men:

  1. Megyn Kelly (35%)
  2. Kelly Ripa (28%)
  3. Savannah Guthrie (11%)

National Kissing DayIn honor of National Kissing Day, Match and Colour Pop created limited edition lipstick, Mwah, a raspberry red ultra-matte lipstick, plus $1 of each lipstick purchased will be donated to GLAM4GOOD Foundation, for only $6.

Check out these special lipsticks here: ColourPop.com/mwah

If you’re away from your sweetheart, remember to send a few digital hugs and kisses XOXO’s via text on your mobile phone to celebrate International Kissing Day. Remember that a goodbye kiss can be more important than the hello kiss and leave a wonderful memory to the end of your date.

What’s your kissing style? Do you have your own kissing dos and don’ts? A dream spot for that first kiss?

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter

 

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