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Fun Dating Ideas for a Rainstorm


Dating Rain Storm

Grab your umbrellas and galoshes. It’s raining. When it rains in Los Angeles, it’s a hard news story, especially with the current drought conditions

Growing up on the East Coast, I remember the first blizzards of the season happening about the same time as our current downpour in the ‘City of Angels.’

Last year, people panicked and filled up their pantries with food and water for the first blizzard of 2015. When #Snowmageddon was heading to the East Coast with record anticipated snowfall from New York to Boston, it was a major news story.

Now, we much have needed rain to fill our empty reservoirs and drop a ton of snow on the mountains to keep the ski resorts flourishing on the West Coast.

The phenomenon in Los Angeles when it rains has always mystified me.

Golf games are canceled, birthday lunches have empty seats, movie screenings are not well-attended, and those who dare to drive tend to slam on their breaks, so accidents are abundant when it’s raining outside.

Now to the subject of dating. Don’t cancel your dates!

Singles who have filled their date cards are probably wondering whether to cancel their dates or not. Don’t be a rain-flake. There are an abundance of songs about rain that are uber-romantic, so grab your umbrellas and mobile phones, but don’t change your plans, and please don’t cancel your dates.

Whether you stay in or go out, here are some dating ideas for a rainy day or night.

1. Go on a Skype or FaceTime Date

Get dressed up with what you’d wear on a date, and remember to put on your lipstick ladies. The two of you should pour a glass of wine or bubbly for the occasion. Date night is still on, it’s just a digital date.  Log on and have a virtual date rather than canceling your plans.

2. Answer these 36 Love Questions

A Modern Love column on the New York Times reads, To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This. These questions from Psychologist Dr. Aron suggest they can help you fall in love with anybody. Some questions include:

  • Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life
  • Tell your partner something that you like about them.

This exercise should help you get to know each other better and has been known to be responsible for some marriages.

Not sure if that’s realistic or not? Why not give it a try.

3.  Watch ‘Downton Abbey’ or Binge Watch on Netflix

Snuggled up with your date? Why not spend the day or evening binge watching some romance on Netflix. If you recorded the Season Premiere of  ‘Downton Abbey,’ it could be a perfect time to watch it together.  P.S. There are some romantic scenes in the first episode of season six.

4. Take a Walk Under an Umbrella

Men love to be protectors. Here’s your chance guys to show her your chivalrous side. Keep that date and take a walk with her, while keeping her dry. As your cuddled up together under the umbrella, you’ll be hugging and maybe even kissing. It’s worth not canceling a date for, believe me.

5. Send Each Other Songs About Rain

Stay digitally connected with music throughout the night. It’s fun playing ‘Name that Tune’ and even William Shakespeare said, ‘If music be the food of love, play on.” From “Bus Stop” by the Hollies to Led Zeppelin’s “Rain Song,” there’s a rainy day song just for the two of you.

Read 30 Great Love Songs About Rain.

6. Create an Indoor Scavenger Hunt

If the geography and transportation allows you to keep your scheduled date, a great way to make it fun and flirty is to create a treasure or scavenger hunt inside your home. To do this, place romantic clues in envelopes around your house and number them. At each location, there will be a love note with suggestions for a kiss, a back rub, a foot massage, or whatever your imagination will allow.

7. Write a Traditional Love Note

If your electricity goes out and the battery life has expired on your mobile phone, light a candle and grab and pen and paper. It’s time to get traditional and draft a hand-written love note. When you get together for your rescheduled date, hand him or her an envelope to open. You’ll be surprised how it will be received.

Will you be canceling your dates or be taking a digital approach to stay in touch?

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and is the CEO of, where they create Irresistible Dating Profiles and coach singles on the dating scene. For more relationship advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt Newsletter.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Facebook, Linkedin, and Instagram


Dating Netiquette: Why Grammar Matters

Netiquette grammarThe weekend is approaching and suddenly you realize your date card is empty.

The easiest solution is to log onto your favorite online dating site or mobile dating app and start swiping and writing to that cutie who has been sending you sweet little nothings, right?

Here’s the problem with rushing to respond to every email or text. You may be breaking the rules of netiquette.

  • The auto-correct has become your worst nightmare.
  • It doesn’t matter that you have multiple degrees and a big bank balance.
  • What does matter is when you rush to reply and your grammar is a complete mess.
  • Typos make you appear lazy and actually unintelligent.

The trend is to be casual when sending a text or email and if it’s to someone you’ve known for a while or a friend, it’s acceptable to abbreviate words. If you’re looking to make a great first impression in a crowded digital dating playground, you’ll be ignored or he or she will probably swipe left.

Here are a few examples of first texts and emails that will get ignored and how to fix them.

hey….saw your txt. wanna hang out this wknd?

What’s wrong with this one?

  1. hey.  Horses hang out in hay. It’s too casual and you won’t appear like boyfriend or girlfriend material. You also haven’t taken the time to capitalize the letter H in hey. Swipe left.
  2. saw your txt. The caps button is there for a reason. It’s goal is to help you write a sentence where the first word is capitalized. txt, well why can’t you add one more letter and say text?
  3. Wanna hang out this wknd? Wanna isn’t a word, but you already knew that. wknd is short for weekend, but you knew that as well.

How r u doing?

What’s wrong with this one?

  1. r u. I know it’s obvious, but it again doesn’t show you at your most intellectual best.
  2. Take the time and write something more personal in a full sentence. A good example would be:  Hi Patty! Happy Wednesday. How’s your day going so far?

Still stumped? I put together a list of 20 Flirty messages to capture his or her heart. Use this as your digital cheat-sheet and remember, sending a good morning and a good night text to someone you have a crush or your current girlfriend or boyfriend will make them think warm fuzzy thoughts about you all day and even into their dreams at night.

Related: Why Texting and Dating Make Women Anxious

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. For more dating advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter and follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram.

This is the Top Gift for Singles

A few years ago on Cyber Monday, The New York Post published an article that caught the eye of many singles entitled, Best Holiday Gift is a Date.

Forget the lingerie or tech gifts, if you’re single, you really want a great date, right?

On a day where shopping frenzy is at an all time high, singles are more worried about finding a date. It’s true that finding a date for the holidays is the number one stress for singles now.

Match says their traffic increases by almost 23 percent during the holidays. They claim that 59.5 percent of those polled said they’d prefer a kiss over a new laptop on New Year’s Eve.

Match found that 48 percent of respondents listed in their poll said finding someone to share the holiday with as their biggest end-of-the-year worry, while only 23 percent said they’re most anxious about finding the perfect present.

As an online dating expert and relationship coach, I agree with their findings.

Cyber-Dating Expert has shown a huge spike since Halloween and many singles signed up for the Black Friday and Cyber Monday specials, with the hope of finding someone sooner, rather than later.

Remember, if you’re a single woman who wants to couple-up, there are many single men who feel the same way during the holidays.

Let me help you find your dream date for the holidays and make it a better experience for you by creating your Irresistible online dating profile.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of Internet dating and has been helping singles find love online and on their mobile phones for over 20 years. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.



Did You Know It’s Cuffing Season?

Autumn HeartHello November!

It’s starting to get chilly outside and singles and couples alike are starting to think about bundling up with someone special for the holidays. Just yesterday, we had rain in Los Angeles, which is unusual and I bundled up with my ski parka as the temperatures dipped.

In case you haven’t heard of it, it’s officially ‘Cuffing Season.’ You might wonder what exactly ‘Cuffing Season’ is, so here’s the scoop.

What is Cuffing Season?

Cuffing season starts in the fall when the weather starts to change, kids go back to school, and the leaves start to fall on the ground. Suddenly you’ll notice friends of yours who claim to be forever single appearing at a party with a significant other or new boyfriend or girlfriend. Others will flock to online dating sites to hope to connect with someone for the holidays. To be honest here, it’s a busy time for singles looking for love online as they imagine kissing under the mistletoe with someone special or toasting a glass of bubbly on New Year’s.

In thinking back to my past, I can honestly say that several of my relationships started in the fall and solidified in November to being exclusive. Did they know it was ‘Cuffing Season?’ Probably not.

So my friends and tweethearts, as a dating and relationship expert and coach, I encourage you to take the covers off your head, go out with a big smile on your face and be approachable, as it really can be an exciting time for love. Sipping hot toddies or hot chocolate by the fireplace is a visual you just might want to be a participant in. Party invites from business networking events are starting to pile in, so RSVP and fill up your date card.


It’s time to embrace the month we are to be the most thankful for with Thanksgiving around the corner. Time is speeding fast and there are plenty of singles that will be excited to have you in their life.

If you’re in a toxic relationship or one that makes you anxious or are walking on eggshells, it’s time to get out. Staying in a bad relationship for the holidays just prevents you from finding someone more compatible to create new memories with. The possibilities are endless!

If you need any hand holding, check out our Irresistible Profiles packages to help speed up your search.

Happy Cuffing Season.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo
~Julie and the Cyber-Dating Expert Team

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She has been helping singles find love on the Internet for over 20 years. Follow @JulieSpira for dating advice and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.


National Kissing Day – Pucker Up

5 Ways to Create a Great Date Night - Cyber Dating ExpertToday, world will be celebrating International Kissing Day, so if you’re still on a high from Fourth of July fireworks, there’s no need to let the flame sizzle.

Every year on July 6th, singles and couples will have a good excuse to become more romantic and flirty for this annual holiday. It’s time to get creative, both on the lips and in the desired location of that memorable kiss.

In honor of International Kissing Day, our friends at online dating site Zoosk conducted a survey of 3500 singles in the United States to find out everything you need to know about kissing. From air kisses to French kisses, find out the most popular styles of kissing and the biggest turn-offs for a bad kiss.

Related: Kissable Lips

According to the survey, most singles have dated a bad kisser. With 73% of the singles polled claiming they’ve been stuck in a bad kissing situation, know that you’re not alone when you meet a kisser with the slobbering tongue, bad breath, or the one who kisses with his or her mouth closed.

Speaking of closed, the Zoosk survey showed that 83% of singles do prefer to kiss with their eyes closed as compared to wide-open.

Music and romance do go hand-in-hand, so it’s natural that those surveyed had some favorite make-out songs. The top selections included “Could I Have This Kiss Forever?” by Whitney Houston & Enrique Iglesias, as well as “A Kiss From a Rose” by Seal and “Blow Me One Last Kiss” by Pink.

French kissing, surprisingly enough is more popular in the United States than in France. According to the survey, 46% of Americans prefer the French kiss as compared to 21% of those kissing in France.

Where do couples want to memorialize their kiss? The beach came in as the top choice with 30% of the votes, followed by kissing in the car, by a roaring fireplace, and on a carriage ride in Central Park in New York City.

If you’re away from your sweetheart, remember to send a few digital hugs and kisses XOXO’s via text on your mobile phone to celebrate International Kissing Day. Remember that a goodbye kiss can be more important than the hello kiss and leave a wonderful memory to the end of your date.

What’s your kissing style? Do you have your own kissing dos and don’ts? A dream spot for that first kiss?

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter


Fun Summer Dating Ideas

Big red Heart shape on sandy beach by the ocean

Happy Summer!

With Fourth of July around the corner and on a weekend as well, it’s time to start thinking about fun things to do with your date.

This year, Friday is the official start of the three day weekend, so start thinking about fireworks online and offline and check out ten of the best summertime first date ideas that won’t break the bank, nor will it put too much pressure on a date with someone new.

Happy dating and enjoy the sunshine all summer long.


Ferris Wheel - Summer Date Ideas

1. Ride the Ferris Wheel.

Go to an amusement park and ride the Ferris Wheel or even the roller coaster, if you dare.


Festival concept.

2. Find a free outdoor concert.

Bring a picnic meal and a blanket and take in the sounds of local artists. Some museums and parks actually have well-known musicians.

Drive in movies dating ideas

3. Watch an outdoor movie.

While drive-in theaters have become obsolete, the trend of watching movies on a big screen at a shopping center or local park has become all the rage.

Bar-B-Q or BBQ

4. Barbecue.

Make sure to go grocery shopping together to spice up the date. Cooking together can be filled with laughter. Don’t forget to pick up chocolate, marshmallows, and graham crackers to make s’mores for dessert.

bike riding date

5. Go on a bike ride.

Make it more memorable by renting a bicycle built for two! Remember to take photos and of course, ask for permission before posting to Instagram.

Beach Yoga Date

6. Take a Beach Yoga Class.

Yoga is sexy on a date. Remember to bring your sunscreen. If you don’t live near a beach, check out the many outdoor classes in a park.

Chefs at work

7. Take a cooking Class.

Stores such as Sur le Table nationwide have cooking classes on their calendar. If you can’t find one near you, check out the local universities and colleges or a MeetUp group for foodies.

car icon set illustration

8. Snack at the Food Trucks.

Many neighborhoods have a food truck day. Find out which day or night they’ll be parked in your neighborhood. From the healthy green truck to a spicy Mexican cuisine, there’s a favorite truck for every type of palate.

Baseball heart

9. Go to a baseball game.

It’s the season for America’s favorite past time. Nibble on peanuts and Cracker Jack and enjoy the 7th inning stretch. Check the website for dates and times. Not in a baseball city, find a minor league game near you.

Zoo dating

10. Go to a zoo.

It’s fun to feed the animals at the zoo Take it a step further and walk into the petting zoo and spend time with the llamas and sheep.

Don’t forget to memorialize your fun outdoor date by snapping photos. Who knows, you just might end up with a nice kiss at the end of the date to add to your digital memory book.

Follow @JulieSpira for online dating advice and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She coaches singles on the dating scene with her Irresistible Profiles programs to help them find love offline.

Brunettes Have More First Dates [infographic]

Match WellaIs it true that blondes have more fun?

Our friends at Match teamed up with Wella for a #LoveisintheHair survey to of online daters on Match to find out what the guys and gals had to say about women and their hair color and styles.

Check out this fun Infographic and maybe try a new hairstyle for your next date to mix it up.

Some of the key findings are:

  • Blondes have more long-term relationships.
  • Brunettes have more first dates.
  • Almost half of the women think that sleek and straight hair makes them feel more confident.
  • Almost half of the single men found women with curly hair to be more irresistible
  • 1/4 of single men find women with straight-sleek hair to be more wife-worthy
  • 1/4 of single men find women with hair in braids to be more sporty

Does this mean you need to run to the hair salon and change your color and style? I say no. The number one attraction to a man will always be confidence, so ladies…smile be confident, be happy both on the Internet and offline and he’ll be enjoying his date with you.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter for online dating advice.

Click here for 20% off your membership to Match membership and let us help you create your irresistible online dating profile.

Does Texting Make Your Dating Life Crazy?

Texting TipsWe live in a fast-paced digital world where texting and tweeting has replaced the human voice in matters of the heart. With digital dating, texts can make anyone anxious.

When it comes to love and romance, that good morning text or smiley face emoticon can make your day. Receiving a text when your date gets home to say he had a great time will help you fall asleep with a smile on your face. Hearing the chime on your phone with a simple, “Sweet dreams” is an almost guarantee that you’ll be dreaming about him.

On the opposite end of the digital spectrum, the absence of a daily text or a change in routine can send many in new relationships and the lovelorn into an unnecessary panic attack. Let’s face it. Women often tend to over-analyze the word count and sentence structure of every text they receive from men. What’s intended to just make sure you have a connection and to keep the momentum going often ends up with a bad reaction of sending a text you wish you hadn’t pushed the send button on, or not sending any reply at all. It’s enough to make you lose sleep at night, grab a pint of ice cream, or dial ten girlfriends to ask them what to do. It’s exhausting and unnecessary. It’s just a text or a way to ping someone to stay in touch, not a relationship measuring stick on whether he’s into you or not.

Most people are so attached to their cell phones that they sleep with them at night or would put them in the shower with them if they were waterproof. Texting can be addicting, but is a great form of digital foreplay.

If the rhythm of your texts has gone awry from your digital crush, here are some of the reasons why and tips on how to stay calm when your phone isn’t chirping or vibrating.

1.  He’s Busy. Men are typically goal-oriented and work and projects are at the top of their list. He might be stuck in a meeting all day out of the office and forgot to tell you his schedule. He might be compartmentalizing and getting his tasks done for the day before he starts to think about romance with you. He might be on an airplane without WiFi. The list goes on. If he isn’t texting you, it doesn’t mean you’re not on his mind. Women on the other hand are great at multitasking. They text, talk, tweet, and blow-dry their hair at the same time.

What to do: Take a deep breath. It’s just a text and not a life-threatening illness. Understand he may not even realize the last time he sent you a text. If you’re on his mind, he might think things are fine.

Read: 20 Flirty Texts to Capture His Heart

2.  He Responds with One Word.  Does it upset you when you write a sweet long text and he replies, with, “ok” or “yep” or “nope?” If so, you’re not alone.

What to do: Reply back with a short text. Use an emoticon such as a happy face to acknowledge it.  Women tend to be more gabby. Guys who are busy read the text reply quickly and move on. Don’t look at his word-count as a lack of interest. He’s not keeping score, nor should you.

3. He Hasn’t Figured Out Your Relationship Status.If you started out as friends and moved into casual dating, he might not be sure if it’s time to get serious or not. Going steady is a big deal to guys. It means they typically won’t be keeping their options open anymore. Rather than disappearing permanently, his texts might become less frequent while he sorts it out.

What to do: Stop living and judging the health of your new relationship based upon the frequency of texts. Take the time to enjoy the moments you have together and don’t over think or spend your precious time projecting to the future. Allow your relationship to progress at its own pace. Women worry about relationship labels. Men think about how they feel when they are around you and miss you when you’re apart. When he realizes you’re a catch and doesn’t want anyone stealing his girl, he’ll amp it up. Don’t ask him why he hasn’t sent you a text in five days. When you hear from him, be happy and respond to keep the digital dialog going.

Read: He Texts Me Daily. Are We in a Relationship?

4.  He has a girlfriend or is involved. Some guys are just flirts by nature. They like to engage in digital conversations with women to boost their egos to keep their options open. If he’s texting you sporadically, but not putting a date on the calendar or changing plans last minute, he just might be setting you up as a back-up girl or might have had a bump on the road with his steady sweetie.

What to do: Ask him. Be blunt and honest. If he can’t schedule something with you on the weekends, but loves to text with you during the week, you should be filling up your date card and keeping your options open. Let him know you’d like to be friends, but don’t allow yourself to get invested in a relationship where you’re just the backup girl. Who really wants to play second fiddle?

5. He always replies a day later. Most of us are attached to our phones, but sometimes the battery life gets depleted, the phone is turned off, someone went to sleep early, family commitments get in the way, or they glanced at your text and decided to reply in the morning. All of these scenarios are natural. However if every text is returned 24 hours later, then realize that he just isn’t that interested in you or is playing hard to get. The digital flow just isn’t happening.

Watch: What to Do if He Only Wants to Text Me [vide0]

What to do: You can mirror his actions by taking another 24 hours to reply, but it’s just game-playing. Let him know that you enjoy receiving texts from him and the daily banter. If he still doesn’t up the ante, find someone else who can’t wait to see your text or emoticon on his phone.

Read: I Saw His Text Messages: Is He Cheating or Is It Over?

Remember, communication in relationships is key and everyone these days use their cell phones for calls, texts, tweets, and facebook comments or likes. Let your guy know that staying in touch when you’re apart and that his texts put a smile on your face. Don’t play texting games and punish him by not replying to his texts when he sends them. No one wants to be with someone who is playing too hard to get. Show that you appreciate it when he takes the time to send you a text. Keep those smiley face emoticons in your text replies when you’re happy to hear from him.

At the end of the digital day, texting is just one ingredient in the recipe for love, it’s not the sole defining factor in your relationship.

Read: 5 Texting Tips to Help Improve Your Relationship

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of, where they create Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene and help daters swipe right on mobile apps such as Tinder. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Breaking Up: 12 Signs You May Be Getting Dumped

Is flirting online considered cheatingMost of us go into relationships with the best of intentions. We put our best feet forward in the first few weeks or month with the anticipation that the relationship will continue to grow and go the distance.

We introduce our partner to our friends and family hoping to get the vote of approval. Often we share our dreams for the future, plan holidays and vacations together, and learn the fine art of compromising in a relationship, because we know it’s worth it.

Sometimes outside influences can attack our relationship resulting in the inevitable bumps on the road. It’s at these times that we look at our partner and either deal favorably with conflict resolution, or sadly our ego sometimes gets in the way and we end up heading for a fall.

From financial issues to family stress, the romantic gestures from an outsider at work to juggling the schedules of children, or even job pressures can affect the best of relationships.

Here are a few tips to know if you’re relationship is on its way out, or if it’s just a pull back or bump on the road that hopefully will become a distant memory.

  1. They stop sending regular text messages. If your significant other used to start his or her day with a good morning text and good night text, but those have disappeared, chances are the relationship could be fizzling out.
  2. Phone calls are reduced. If your significant other usually calls you routinely on his or her lunch break, while driving home from work, or before bedtime when you’re not together, and the calls have been reduced to once a day or a few times a week, your sweetheart may be disengaging from the relationship.
  3. Pet names disappear. He or she goes from affectionately saying, “It’s me” to leaving messages with their first or full name, assume the familiarity and romance are on their way out. Affectionate pet names are part of a relationship. It’s what makes you unique as a couple and puts a smile on your face.
  4. Plans are made without you in mind. If your normal routine is to see each other a few times a week and on weekends and suddenly your significant other would rather go out for drinks with friends and go home alone instead of into your arms, assume they are creating more distance and are open to the possibilities of meeting someone else.
  5. Future talks are put on hold. If you had been discussing living together or even planning a vacation six months out and now you’re not sure when you’ll be getting together in the next few days, your relationship suddenly might become a short-term affair, and not with someone who wants to go the distance anymore.
  6. Sex dissipates. Having a healthy sex life creates bonding in a relationship. If your boo is having doubts about the relationship, often sex is the first thing to go. When your sex life goes from “hot” to “not,” there’s a possibility your partner is detaching from the relationship.
  7. PDA disappears. If you’re the kind of affectionate couple who holds hands in public and loves cuddling at night and suddenly you find yourself sleeping on your side of the bed, there could be trouble in paradise. If the welcome home kisses are no longer part of your regime, it’s a sign that your relationship might be falling out of the love zone.
  8. Grooming habits change. From getting a Brazilian bikini wax to sporting a new hairstyle, joining a gym, or starting a new diet, when your significant other starts to change their looks and takes more time to focus on their appearance, they might have someone in mind other than you.
  9. They become attached to their phone. If suddenly your sweetheart is staring at his or her text messages, keeping their phone uber-handy, and staring at Facebook instead of focusing on you, you’ve just become lower on the totem pole than his or her smart phone. If they go into another room to secretly respond to a text or a phone call or turn their phone upside down so you won’t see who’s texting or calling, there’s probably trouble in paradise.
  10. Titles disappear. While titles are usually more important to a woman than to a man, if you’ve been introduced as the girlfriend, boyfriend, or partner and suddenly you’re being introduced as, “This is Janie,” there could be trouble on the horizon or you might be moving into the friend zone.  Read: Why Won’t He Call Me His Girlfriend
  11. Reactivates their online dating profile. If you’ve met online, but unplugged your profiles to be exclusive, don’t be surprised when one of you starts fishing to look for Plan B. Typically before a breakup, someone may like to view their options before making a clean break. Read: Gone Fishing, or is it Over?
  12. You’re thinking of breaking up. If the thought of breaking up is on your mind (if you’re reading this, that’s probably the case), you’ve put together your pros and cons list about your relationship or are think you might need some space, chances are your sweetie may be thinking the same as well.

What should you do if you can relate to most of these items on this list? Before you toss your relationship away, understand that feelings can fluctuate, but if the flow has been disrupted by most of these relationship issues on this list, you might be headed for splitsville.

Read: What to Do When He Pulls Back

Before you pull out the tissue box and think it’s over, take the time to talk to your partner about how important they are in your life. Acknowledge there’s been a shift in the relationship and ask them if there are any outside stressors that could be affecting the two of you. One of you might still be brewing about something that happened over a month ago and perhaps an apology needs to be made if your partner is feeling resentful about something or misunderstood.

Acknowledge how affectionate you used to be and let your partner know that you miss those warm and fuzzy happy times and would love to get back on track. Take the time to listen to your partner’s concerns. If you truly think this is a relationship worth fighting for, let your partner know that you don’t want to make an impulsive and abrupt decision that you might regret. Ask how you can help bring back the romance in your life.

If your partner just isn’t feeling it for you anymore, don’t fight it. Thank them for the memories and start the healing process. I know it hurts to have another failed relationship, but I also know that there is someone special out there waiting for you. You just haven’t met him or her yet.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

What to Do if He Only Wants to Text Me

In this video on Your Tango’s Quickie Series, we tackle the subject of the guy who only wants to text you for a date, or in between.

The problem many women have with this is they don’t want to fall into the category of booty call or be uncertain about their relationship status.

While I believe texting can be fun in a relationship, when your guy says, “Thinking of u” or you say “Can’t wait for your delicious kisses,” too many women complain that their boyfriends won’t pick up the phone and call.

Here’s the truth ladies: Most guys don’t really like to talk on the phone. They’ll call to make you happy, if you let them know it means a lot to you. Otherwise, get ready for showing up on a date after being sent a text with the date and time of your next rendezvous. Watch our video to help him go from casual to crazy about you, online and IRL.

But if you tell him the sound of his sexy voice helps you fall asleep with a smile on your face, you just might get this text-happy guy to pick up the phone.

Are you in a text only relationship?

Watch our other Videos.

Your comments are welcome.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

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