As Heard on KCBS Radio San Francisco’s “Ask an Expert”
There’s no doubt about it: dating can be expensive. Between premium dating app subscriptions, transportation, dining out, drinks, and even pre-date grooming, the costs add up quickly.
But should you put your love life on hold while watching your checkbook?
That was one of the topics I explored during a recent appearance on KCBS Radio San Francisco’s “Ask an Expert” segment with veteran broadcaster Steve Scott. Our conversation was prompted by findings from a Bank of America 2026 Better Money Habits Study, which found that 51% of adults ages 18-29 report spending zero dollars on dates each month, while nearly one in four say they’re delaying moving relationships forward because of their financial circumstances.
My answer was simple:
No.
Romance isn’t dead. Singles are becoming more financially responsible and intentional about how they date.
The Price Tag on Modern Romance
There’s no denying that the cost of dating has risen dramatically.
A $200 date can feel similar to a monthly car payment for many young adults. When you’re balancing rent, groceries, gas, insurance, student loans, and the everyday cost of living, spending hundreds of dollars on a single evening out can feel depressing.
That doesn’t mean people have stopped desiring relationships.
Instead, it simply means singles are making more deliberate choices about how they spend both their time and money.
There’s a big difference between saying “I can’t afford it” to your potential date and saying “I’m fiscally responsible,” which, these days, can be a big turn-on.
Many singles today are looking for partners who share similar values around money and have good credit scores. Financial compatibility has become one of the most important conversations couples can have.
Read More: Inflation Dating – 6 Reasons Why Dating on a Budget is a Turn-On
Fancy Dates Don’t Always Equal Pricey
One topic that came up was whether a great date requires a fancy dinner and an expensive $75 bottle of wine, and, if not, does that mean your date is cheap?
I believe being upfront about your budget can actually work in your favor. Some singles don’t want to be love-bombed and lavished with expensive gifts, knowing their date might be borrowing from Visa to pay Mastercard.
Going on a meaningful first date doesn’t require an expensive restaurant reservation. Some of the best dates are refreshingly simple:
- Coffee and conversation
- A walk in the park
- Strolling through a farmers’ market
- Going to an art gallery
- Visiting a museum on a free admission day
- A free summer outdoor concert
Read More: From First Dates to Fireworks: Fun Summer Date Ideas
“Romance isn’t measured by what you spend. It’s measured by the connection you create.” – Julie Spira
The most romantic thing you can offer someone on a first date isn’t your credit card. It’s your attention.
Dating on a Budget Isn’t Just a Young Person’s Concern
Although the Bank of America study focused on younger adults, the trend of affordable dating isn’t limited to one generation.
I’m seeing similar behavior among millennials, divorced singles rebuilding their financial lives, and even retirees living on fixed incomes.
The common thread isn’t chronological age.
Single daters, regardless of age, want to know they’re spending their time, money, and emotional energy wisely.
With one-and-done dates the norm, the pressure to overspend on date after date after date is a recipe for failure.
That’s not being cheap. That’s being intentional.
Dating App Fatigue Is Real
During the KCBS segment, dating app fatigue was also raised, with some apps reporting subscriber declines. Part of the decline in dating app usage may be related to burnout. Part of it may also be financial.
Besides feeling burned out by endless swiping, ghosting, and conversations that never lead anywhere, there’s another issue that doesn’t get discussed often enough: dating apps cost money.
Many apps now encourage users to purchase premium subscriptions, profile boosts, visibility upgrades, and other paid features. For singles already watching their budgets, these additional expenses can add up month after month.
The good news? Dating app fatigue is typically temporary. Singles often take a digital detox, then regroup and return with a clearer sense of what they’re looking for.
Read More: Dating App Burnout? Try a Digital Dating Detox, Then Refresh
Video Dates Are Still Having a Moment
One of the most affordable and effective ways to get to know someone is through a video date with FaceTime, WhatsApp, or Zoom.
A video conversation can help determine whether there’s enough chemistry, compatibility, and mutual interest to justify investing more time and money to meet in person or can be a great way to bond in a long-distance relationship.
Two people cooking the same recipe together on video, sharing a glass of wine, comparing notes, then planning a picnic for the next date, or binge-watching the same series, haven’t lost their luster. Video dates aren’t replacing traditional dating. They’re simply another tool to help forge a deeper connection between dates.
The Continued Rise of Slow Dating
Our interview also touched on something worth exploring more deeply.
Dating used to start with butterflies in your stomach and the excitement of getting to know someone new. Now, for many singles, it’s become a calculation on a spreadsheet. That’s a real shift.
But here’s an encouraging way to look at the numbers: if 25% of singles are delaying relationships, that means 75% are not.
What I’m seeing is that slow dating, where you take the time to get to know someone over multiple seasons before making major commitments, is taking a healthy path to romance.
Longer courtships provide opportunities to observe how someone handles finances, family dynamics, career challenges, stress, and long-term goals before making a lifelong commitment.
A slower pace doesn’t mean less commitment. It actually creates stronger foundations.
Read More: Dating Trends in 2026: Why singles are demanding clarity, steadiness, and healthier emotional choices
Final Flirts
The numbers don’t lie, but don’t let the financial trend cause you to give up on love.
Relationships will continue to build. They may just take a little longer to develop than in previous generations, and that’s OK.
The purpose of a first date isn’t to over-impress someone. It’s simply to determine whether you’d like to see them again.
And while dating may be more expensive than it once was, meaningful connections have never depended on the size of the check.
A successful date is when both of you feel a real connection and decide to schedule a second, then a third, and a fourth. Before you know it, you just might find yourself in a committed relationship without even trying.
Listen to the full KCBS Interview
Julie Spira is the Digital Matchmaker® and America's Top Online Dating Expert. She's an award-winning certified dating coach who's been helping singles find their perfect match for over three decades. Follow @JulieSpira on IG and @digitalmatchmaker on TikTok.