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Dating Advice – 5 Ways to Heal When Your Ex Moves On

Celebrity relationships were all the buzz this week. As the guest dating expert on “Access Hollywood Live,” I joined Natalie Morales and Kit Hoover to talk about dating, love, Jay-Zee big confession about his marriage to Beyonce, and Ben Affleck’s public appearances with his new girlfriend, SNL producer Lindsay Shookus.

RELATED: Ben Affleck and Lindsay Shookus – Dating Expert Julie Spira Weighs In

With Affleck showing off his new relationship status, the question was asked, “what do you do when your ex moves on?”

Since just about everyone can relate to a heartbreak, we did a deep dive on how Hollywood celebs, or the girl next door should cope post-breakup when your ex finds a new girlfriend.

Here are the 5 tips I shared with Access Hollywood Live

1. Do a Digital Detox

Julie Spira - Access Hollywood

“The first tip is do what I call a digital detox. Even if you’ve said, ‘Okay, we’re going to stay friends when you break up,’ it’s really hard to just move into that friend zone. What happens is you start to become a stalker and you just can’t help yourself. So don’t do that. Block them and unfriend them on Facebook. You can always become friends again once the dust has settled and you both have moved on. Staring at other the other people at you and your sweetheart’s favorite restaurant that you used to go to for your anniversary is just something that is going to sting.”

2. Don’t Compare and Contrast

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“It’s so easy to fall into that trap of comparing yourself to the new girl. You may ask yourself, is she prettier? Does she have nicer clothes? Is she better in bed? Is she smarter? Is she sexier? You get into this trap, and it’s really bad because what happens is, your brain starts to trick you into thinking that comparing yourself to this person is natural. You need to your own individuality. You don’t really know that she’s good at anything other than being the next girl.”

3. Practice Self Love

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“Self-love really is number one. One of these tips that I use with the singles that I coach is if you’re going through a break-up, get dressed up, looked good, stand in front of your mirror and say, ‘You are the the prize,’ and repeat it, ‘You are the prize.’ Eventually, you will believe it. The more that you can love yourself and go out and do good things for yourself, like workout more, maybe lose that weight you want to, take up a yoga class, or take up a new hobby, the more you will become more dateable.”

4. Avoid the Rebound Relationship

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“We see more rebound relationships with men than with women. Women tend to hang out with their girlfriends and, of course, talk about their ex. Just because he might have moved on in a split second doesn’t mean that you need to do the same. I really feel that– having a replacement boyfriend immediately, can often backfire. It might not be a good fit for you, and then you’ve got to get over two break-ups.”

5. Get Out and Live Life!

Julie Spira - Access Hollywood

“I always say that take that covers off your head. Think about the books and magazines that might have been stacking up and start reading them. Maybe go under a palm tree and read a magazine, or if you actually once thought you might want to write a book, start penning that book and writing down your thoughts. Journal about your break-up because the more you read and write it, the more healing it is. Remember, there’s a reason that you broke up and that this person is now your ex. I always say, “Knock him off that pedestal right now.”

RELATED: Jay-Z and Beyonce – Dating Expert Julie Spira Weighs In

Julie Spira is a celebrity dating coach, relationship expert and online dating expert. She’s the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles for over 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles programs.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter

These Names Will Get you More Right Swipes on Tinder

Is your first name holding you back from getting matches and swipes on Tinder?

The mobile dating app just released their Top 10 list of the most popular female and male names that are getting the most right swipes in the United States.

Tinder Female Names

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For those named Hannah, Emma, Lauren, Julia, Emily, Rachel, Samantha, Katie, Anna, or Sarah, congratulations! You’ve made the 2016 top swiped list of female names on Tinder.

You should have more matches than most, and I challenge you to start chatting, filling your dating card, and meeting IRL.

Related: Tinder Tales on the Tomorrow Show

For the guys, if you’re lucky enough to be named Lucas, Ryan, Matthew, Nick, Josh, Brandon, Justin, Ben, Adam, and Andrew, the ladies will be swiping right on your profile more than most.

Tinder Male Names

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Does this mean you need to change your name? That would sure be confusing if your name is Larry and your profile says “Lucas” to try to attract more swipes.

Related: This Tinder Feature Will Help You Stand Out

I believe in authenticity, so don’t confuse yourself or your potential date, but if your name is on the list, log on and swipe more often to see if your match numbers increase.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam .xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of the Internet and is the creator of Mobile Dating BootCamp. As a celebrity dating coach, Julie creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene.

For dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook. Sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter delivered to your inbox.

Bumble and Spotify: A Musical Match That Will Work

Bumble SpotifyIt appears Bumble has been adding new features to their popular mobile dating app.

First they added gifs from gifphy to up users flirt game, which we adore, but aren’t sure how many people are using them.

Then it was the BFF, where you can find a friend (non-romantic) to hang out with. I actually saw a billboard on freeway on the way to Coachella, so they’re serious about making it a social networking app.

Then they announced that men also had 24 hours to reply to a message from the women to potentially prevent ghosting.

Now on their blog Bumble has announced they will be partnering with Spotify to bring music preference integration to user profiles. This is music to my digital ears and is a marriage I’m quite happy about.

We actually recommended Tastebuds as a potential dating app earlier this year for music lovers.

Here’s how Bumble’s music integration works:

Bumble will allow users to connect their Spotify accounts so that potential matches can view their most played artists and see what music tastes they have in common.

Bumble CEO and founder, Whitney Wolfe, told TechCrunch, “Music says a lot about who we are as people and connecting culturally can serve a foundation for creating meaningful relationships,” so clearly, it was only a matter of time before Bumble and Spotify teamed up for this new feature.

Over the next few weeks, users will be able to connect their Spotify accounts to their profiles. If you’re interested in an artist on someone’s profile, simply click the artist to open Spotify and begin opening your ears (and your heart) to your potential online love’s music taste.

Bumble SpotifyThis update will not only provide users with more information about each other before they decide to swipe right or left, but it will also create a conversation starter. “I see Adele is one of your top played artists. What’s your favorite album?” is a great way to delve into your digital crush’s preferences and show interest in what they like to listen to.

If you’re worried about guilty pleasure artists or songs you listen to that you wouldn’t want a potential digital crush to see, you have no need to worry. The Verge reported that artists streamed during private listening sessions won’t be counted when calculating who your most listened to artists are.

This new Spotify feature will also help put music lovers at ease. If you’ve ever been nervous about handing a new love the AUX cord in the car, now you’ll know their music interests ahead of time and won’t have to spend time worrying if they can be trusted to DJ in the car.

Will you be adding Spotify to your Bumble account?

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Mobile Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of online dating and as a celebrity dating coach, has been helping singles on finding love online for over two decades with her Irresistible Profiles coaching programs.  Julie’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online .

For dating advice, like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert and follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.

Interested in improving your odds on Bumble or Tinder? Check out SwipingRight to help you find your dream date.

Julie Spira to Revamp Bevy Smith’s Dating Profiles on SiriusXM

Bevy Smith TinderJoin Online Dating Expert Julie Spira as she returns to SiriusXM’s ‘Bevelations’ as a guest with radio show host Bevy Smith on April 6th.

Julie will be critiquing Bevy’s Match and Tinder profiles LIVE at 5:30pm/ET, 2:30pm/PT on SiirusXM’s ‘Radio Andy’ Channel 102.

Listen as Julie revamps Bevy’s dating profiles and teaches listeners all the tips on how to be successful online and on mobile dating apps.

You won’t want to miss this lively discussion with the former Bravo “Fashion Queens” star and host, Bevy Smith.

We’ll be live tweeting from @JulieSpira with the hashtag of #Bevelations, so follow us on Twitter for the conversation.

Julie Spira is Ameria’s Top Online Dating Expert and was an early adopter of Internet dating. She’s a celebrity dating coach and the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert. Julie has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years and is the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online, newly released with a magical epilogue and a fairy tale ending.

For dating advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter and follow @JulieSpira on Instagram and Twitter.