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Cyber Love Story – Melissa and Ross

Cyber Love Story - Melissa and Ross

Meet Melissa and Ross, who found love on Match.

When Melissa first came to me, she was nervous about hiring a dating coach, and just became single for the first time in 20 years. She was actually terrified of trying online dating for the first time.

We created her Irresistible Profile on Match, had a super-fun photo shoot, and went live her dating profile with the headline of “LA Farm Girl.”

Melissa loves animals, had lived on a ranch, and as a single mom of two teenage kids, needed to find someone who was devoted to his family like she was.

Ross, whose screen name was “Dog Lover” wrote to Melissa within a few days of her profile going live.

His first message said, “You are beautiful and too beautiful to be on Match.”

He asked, “Is that what you really look like?”

Melissa replied with, “I sure hope so. I just took the photos last week.”

Before she met Ross, 
Melissa went on three dates to build up her confidence and get out of her shell. “It felt a bit overwhelming,” she said.

RELATED: Moving from Best Friends to a Relationship

As Melissa and Ross continued to chat, they both realized they had much more than pets and children in common. Both had coincidentally attended the University of Southern California (USC) at the same time, were both enrolled in the communications program, and lived two houses apart. It was hard to believe that they had never met while in college.

Then one day, Ross sent her a message on Match and asked, “Are you done meeting these weirdos and ready to give me a chance?”

Melissa felt a connection with him and started doing her due diligence to vet Ross to make sure he was the real deal. One of her friends told her that Ross was a terrific attorney. Another friend of hers said they had built Ross’s house, and that their children went to school together.

“Everyone said wonderful things about him,” says Melissa.

Because they knew so many people in common, she felt safe about having him pick her up for their first date.

By the time they met, Melissa said they both felt like they had known each other forever.

For their first date, Ross arrived with roses, wine, and they went to dinner, where they felt a warm connection right away. “He was a real gentleman,” says Melissa.

“I knew when I saw your picture and when I heard your voice from the first conversation, that you were ‘the one,'” says Ross.

RELATED: How to Take Down Your Match Profile When You Meet The One

They quickly introduced their kids to each other, met each other’s families, and now realize they are each other’s forever.

Congratulations to Melissa and Ross, our online dating success couple, who proves that the big world-wide-web can make you feel like you’re at home when the right one comes along.

Read our other Cyber Love Stories

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and an award-winning dating coach. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles programs.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook

SIGN UP for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter for dating advice delivered to your inbox.

10 Ways to Flirt BIG TIME on St. Patrick’s Day Weekend

Cyber Dating ExpertIt’s St. Patrick’s Day weekend, and since the holiday falls on a Saturday, the fun and activities will start on Friday.

How should you get in the spirit of this flirty holiday?

Should you be wearing green as an ice breaker?

Years ago, I would wear a button that said “Kiss Me, I’m Irish,” even though there wasn’t a speck of Irish blood in me.

To help ramp up your digital flirting skills, here’s the online dating expert’s guide to dating and flirting on St. Patrick’s Day.

1. Send a flirty text. Texting the the person you have a crush on to say “Happy St. Patrick’s Day” will brighten their day. Add a four-leaf clover emoji. Even if they aren’t Irish, chances are they’ll reply to you.

2. Wear green. Find the tackiest flashing buttons, goofiest, hats, and make sure to wear something green to celebrate. It’s the easiest way to strike up a conversation with someone on St. Patrick’s Day.

3. Change your dating profile. It’s time to mix it up online. Post a photo wearing something green, ask if someone wants to get lucky in love, post quotes about the luck of the Irish and St. Patrick’s Day on your profiles and on social media. Get bolder and post “Kiss me if you’re Irish.”

Start swiping right in the morning on Tinder, Bumble, or other mobile dating apps to find a date by the afternoon.

4. Send a GIF. Open your mobile dating app and send a fun animated GIF to your digital crush. These days, apps such as Tinder, Bumble, and even Facebook and Twitter are using Giphy.

5. Send an animated e-card. We’re big fans of JibJab!, where you send a customized a video or e-card starring you. It will come complete with background music and is guaranteed to give a smile or two.

6. Smile everywhere you go. A smile is contagious and everyone wants to be around someone who appears to be happy. Practice the 5-second stare while smiling at someone you would like to meet. It’s the cue for them to come over and wish you a “Happy St. Patrick’s Day.” Who knows where the conversation will lead?

7. Compliment everyone. You might normally run away from the guy with the tacky green tee shirt, but stop and say hello. Take it one step further and pose in a ‘selfie’ together. He won’t be able to help himself and will put his arm around you for the photo. If the sparks start to fly, it’s your invitation to continue the conversation. Be even bolder and post it, with permission of course, on Facebook or Instagram.

8. Find a parade. Go to a St. Patrick’s Day parade in your city. Everyone loves a parade and it will give you an excuse to start a conversation with those you end up bundled up with.

 

9. Go to the dog park. There’s a reason it’s called puppy love. Our friend Dr. Helen Fisher, Chief Science Officer of Match tells the New York Times that having a dog shows you’re caring and can make a good parent.

Match also reports that 50% of singles wouldn’t date someone who didn’t like pets. Put a green bandana on your dog’s collar and take a walk to the local dog park. Your dog will do the flirting for you and it will be a great conversation starter.

10. Make a Shamrock Shake. We have a healthy recipe for a Shamrock Shake that you’ll absolutely love and it can be a fun date idea. If you aren’t into buying the ingredients, and are flying solo, head to Starbucks for a coffee date and order a green tea Frappuccino, or go to a sushi bar and order green tea and green tea ice cream.

 

Wishing you much love, luck, and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam.

Julie Spira is America’s Top online dating expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s the founder of CyberDatingExpert.com and has been coaching singles on finding love online with her Irresistible Profiles for over 20 years.

Julie’s the bestselling author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook

SIGN UP for the Free Weekly Flirt Newsletter for dating advice delivered to your inbox.

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Julie Spira – ABC News – Valentine’s Survival Guide

 

With Valentine’s Day just a week away, I sat down with ABC-7’s Coleen Sullivan and Ellen Leyva with a Valentine’s Survival Guide to get you to and through the most romantic day of the year.

Can you find love online in time for Valentine’s Day?

I say yes! With the convenience of your mobile phone, we’ll have you chatting and dating in a digital split second.

Here are 10 Tips to Help You Survive Valentine’s Day With a Hug and a Smile

  • Sign up for a Mobile Dating AppUse your Facebook photos to create a new profile and say “love is in the air.” Have a friend or a dating coach like myself help you with your profile.

 

  • Become a serial dater – This is the time I give you permission to date up a storm. Schedule one date a day until Valentine’s Day. Double-down and schedule two dates a day, where one will surely rise to the top and be worthy of a second date.

 

  • Use Premium Features – Match shows you peak times, where their Top Spot feature will show your profile to get the most visibility for just a few hours. OkCupid’s Boost feature will do the same for 15 minutes.

 

  • Give your date a card – A hand signed card or a love note will warm his or her heart for all dating stages.

 

  • Don’t forget Flowers Two billion dollars will be spent on Valentine’s Day flowers this year. Bring one long-stemmed rose or a dozen tulips to have the same effect, while not breaking the bank.

 

  • Say ‘I Love You’ – If you’re relationship is moving forward, there’s no better time to profess your love than on Valentine’s Day.

 

  • Choose In-Room Dining or Cook a Meal Together – If you’ve waited too long to make a reservation at his or her favorite place, pick up some prepared meals at the grocery store, or ingredients for a spicy romantic dinner. Remember to bring candles.

 

  • The gift of time – Valentine’s Day is about spending quality time together, and there’s not better gift than just being together.

 

  • Valentine’s Breakups – It’s not a great idea, but if your relationship has been sliding downhill since the past holiday season, have a talk with your significant other, sooner rather than later. Valentine’s Day can be filled with pressure, so be kind about it and if you’re going to call it quits, do so in person, and not on the phone, email, or in a text message.

 

  • Singles Awareness Day is on February 15th – If you’re not in the mood to find a Valentine and hate the holiday, there’s no need to fret. The day after will be a holiday to celebrate your single status.

Don’t let the pressure get to you about Valentine’s Day. Some people are still paying off their credit cards from December gift giving. A study shows that 54% plan to spend less than $100 and only 10% of singles spend over $250 on Valentine’s Day.

A survey from OneHourTranslation.com of over 4000 people around the world, showed that 31% plan to purchase their gifts online this year, so there’s still time to send something romantic to your Valentine or digital crush.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and is an award-winning dating coach who’s been helping singles on finding love online for over 24 years. 

SIGN UP for the FREE Weekly Flirt for dating advice delivered to your inbox.

 

 

Does Love ‘Trump’ Politics? Match Survey Says Yes

Love Trumps Politics

Source: Match

Last year, I believe Donald Trump hijacked Valentine’s Day.

This year, I’m relieved love is back atop the dating totem pole.

In 2017, with the Inauguration Day and Valentine’s Day less than a month apart, the results of the Electoral College vote permeated the bedroom, as well as surfaced in heated rants on social media, dividing friendships and romantic partners.

As a dating coach and love expert, the news media mostly wanted to talk to me about politics over love.

To say love got kicked to the curb by Donald Trump last year is an understatement, but our country was hurting, and relationships suffered.

I spend my days coaching singles and hearing about their attitudes on politics and dating. 

I’m happy to report I’ve noticed a shift since the new year where singles have been less interested in mentioning politics on their profiles in 2018.

In a previous Match Singles in America Survey from 2016, the dating site found 91% of singles had a better chance of getting to a second date if they mentioned politics on the first date.

With mobile dating profiles filled with text including, ‘Swipe left if you believe in all things Trump,’ to ‘Swipe Right if you think Trump is making America Great Again,’ the sentiments were strong with politics becoming one of the top deal-breakers for singles.

I spoke with Angela Hart, political writer for the Sacramento Bee on the effects of politics and love. Her piece, How Donald Trump is Killing Romance drew harsh criticism from Sean Hannity, who was apparently stunned that singles didn’t want to date a Trump supporter during one of his radio shows.

I even posted my heartfelt and emotional essays, Can True Love Endure Donald Trump and Love and Loss in the Age of Trump, where I painfully expressed how even the best relationships were getting tested due to conflicting political attitudes and views, including mine.

Now, I’m pleased to share the Match Singles in America Survey, of dating habits from 2017, just released for the 2018 Valentine’s season.

The survey shows things have lightened up for daters in the divisive political arena we’ve been living in.

In a section of the survey titled, “The Trump Effect” the Match results showed that singles put love first, ahead of our combative political climate.

Single Daters Will Now Date Across Party Lines

Match’s report showed that an overwhelming majority of singles (72%) would be willing to cross party lines with their date, with only 10% believing dating a Republican is a deal breaker and 5% saying they wouldn’t date a Democrat.

The survey, released just two days after Trump’s State of the Union address, shows singles are willing to be open to a different political point of view, with 45% saying they would try to understand the other’s perspective.

While politics was such a hot dating topic during the election year, 26% of singles in the survey said they’d change the subject if it came up on a date.

Does this mean the topic of politics is off the table for singles? Not at all. In the survey, 54% of singles think it’s important to find out their date’s political views, but the days of walking out on a date are gone, with only 5% admitting they would leave immediately.

It’s refreshing news for those seeking love and romance, and I couldn’t be happier.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s been coaching singles on finding love online for over 24 years with her Irresistible Profiles programs.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter

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He Won’t Call me His Girlfriend – Should We Break Up?

Ask the Cyber-Dating ExpertDear Julie,

I just read your article on online. It’s called 12 Reasons why he won’t call you his girlfriend.

I have been dating a guy for almost 8 months and he doesn’t want to call me his girlfriend. He got out of divorce 2 years ago and it was really bad for him emotionally and financially and he doesn’t want to be pressured.

I told him I just want to be labeled as his girlfriend, not asking for a marriage. He dated a lot of girls and he didn’t go through this emotional issue until he met me. I went thru divorce 15 years ago and finally ready for a real relationship.

What should I do? He tells me I’m important to him and he does treats me well.. I’m about to end the relationship.

Elle

RELATED: Dating Expert Guide to Breaking Up

Dear Elle

I haven’t met you or your boyfriend, so I can’t say for sure what he’s thinking as it relates to your relationship. It’s clear you are at two different points in the relationship cycle. His divorce is still fresh. For men, adding a label does mean he’s all ten toes in and could be committed for life. If he acts like your boyfriend, isn’t seeing anyone else, is loyal and devoted to you, and makes you a priority, you can let it slide. The period from 6-12 months is when a man will decide on his own what label he wants to use to define your relationship. If he says you’re important to him, then believe him. If you think you’re just a transition person, let him know that you don’t think the two of you want the same type of relationship and although he’s important to you, you need to move on.

Let him know IF he changes his mind AND you’re still available, you’d be open to a more serious relationship. Keep me posted and good luck.

Dear Julie,

Well, I broke up with him….because I didn’t understand why he was all afraid of his ex finding out his current relationship. He said he just doesn’t want her to know his life, blah blah blah. I didn’t like his response and I broke up with him via text! I know I’m terrible but he has broken up via text with me before so I don’t feel too bad. I still like him but I wanted to respect my wishes. He has yet to text back. It’s been 6 days..

He also said we are more like a “friend with benefits” because he just doesn’t want a GF because he’s afraid so…. There you go.

RELATED: How to Go From Friends With Benefits to Being in Love

Dear Elle,

You did the right thing. Any man who hates labels then suddenly labels you as a FWB and says he doesn’t want a girlfriend doesn’t deserve someone special like you.

Know that there are great men out there who want exactly what you want. Congratulations on being strong and ignore any text that comes your way.

Guys like to know they can get you back, even if they can’t provide what you’re looking for, which is what was pretty much said to you. I’m sorry you went through this, but better eight months than wasting eight years.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam.

Do you have a question for online dating expert Julie Spira? Send your questions to CyberDatingExpert.com/Contact

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and an award-winning dating coach. As an early adopter of online dating, she’s been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years.

For dating advice, SIGN UP for the FREE Weekly Flirt Newsletter and FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

14 Ways to Date and Flirt on Instagram

Instagram heart

Are you flirting up a storm on Instagram?

Do you think finding love online means only swiping right on Tinder, Bumble or mobile apps?

Is your online dating profile a bit stale and your inbox on the empty side?

As a dating coach, I”m here to teach you how to flirt and find a date on social media, especially on Instagram.

1. Make sure your Instagram profile is public so people can follow you.

You’d be surprised how gun-shy some singles are about Instagram. They may post the most adorable selfies, but have their settings set to private, so unless you’re already connected as friends, you won’t be able to view or like their posts. If you’re single, toss out that fear of being in the public eye. It’s time to make your profile private and become strategic about what you post and who you decide to follow.

2. State in your bio that you’re single.

Being single isn’t a disease. It’s just the relationship status you have at the moment. Often there’s a digital crush who might think you’re taken, even if he or she sees a photo in the arms of your favorite cousin. By stating you’re single, you’ve just opened the love floodgates to millions of potential dates. Get ready for the ride!

RELATED: DATING IN AN INSTAGRAM WORLD

3. Follow back interesting people you think you’d like to date or at least be friends with.

If your follower count is starting to rise, don’t just look at the number. Instead look at who your latest follower is and if they seem interesting at all, follow them back. If they start posting creepy updates, you can always unfollow, or even block them if necessary.

4. Start “liking” their posts, slowly, so you won’t appear like a stalker.

Some singles like to use social media sites in a voyeuristic way. You peek, but you don’t click the like button. You never comment. You don’t even post, but you’re busy watching your followers’ feeds. It’s time to ramp up the flirting and take the digital plunge. Start slowly by liking someone’s posts, but don’t instantly like EVERYTHING this new crush posts or you may come across as needy, creepy, or even as a stalker!

5. Like your crush’s selfies.

Instagram is the perfect home for dating in a selfie world. The reason people post selfies is, well, because they want others to “like” or comment on how great they look or how cool they are. If your crush is looking for attention, don’t be shy. It’s time to click the like button, so you can show up in their feed and get on their digital radar.

6. Post to Instagram Stories

It’s no secret that the ‘Stories’ features which appear at the top of your Instagram feed get the most action. Caption your photos, add a video for more engagement and you’ll rank higher on the dating totem pole than solely posting updates.

7. Start commenting on their posts and add the heart emoticon.

Social networking works best when you remember to stay sociable. Slowly start commenting on his or her posts, but not all of them. If you see they are starting to comment on your posts, add in a heart emoticon to show you might want to be more than just friends.

8. Start using hashtags of #single #singlelife #love #relationships #dating so others can follow you.

Nothing’s a bigger turnoff than going on a digital campaign for someone who isn’t available. When you’re single, let your followers subtly know by using hashtags that define your relationship status. It’s bold, but not as needy as saying, “hey, I’m dateless this weekend and am bummed out about it.”

9. Post romantic quotes about love.

Feeling the love? Show it in your quotes. We post quotes with lyrics from love songs on Instagram, romantic quotes, and create some of our own to show we’re interested in love, big time. So should you.

10. Start searching for others with similar hashtags and start following them.

Being single is better when you’re in similar company. Do a search on Instagram for hashtags of other singles to see who’s feeling like they might want to couple up this ‘Cuffing Season.’

RELATED: YOUR GUIDE TO CUFFING SEASON – GET READY TO COUPLE UP

11. Reply to comments on your posts from someone you could have a crush on.

So you’re in a groove on Instagram and your crush is commenting on your updates and selfies. Now’s not the time to back peddle and get shy. Click the heart button to his or her comments and reply back with an emoticon or xo.

12. Become a Tindstagrammer and Start Direct Messaging.

Once you’ve developed an online rapport, it’s time to start those private chats. In an article on Mashable, writer Rachel Thompson claims that Instagram is the new Tinder – whether you want it to be or not. In addition, if the object of your digital affection ignored you or swiped left on Bumble or Tinder, now they have a public chance to write to you on Instagram. It can be viewed as tenacious or creepy, so if you don’t get a response, hold back from bombarding someone in Insta in multiple DMs.

13. Post Videos

Whether you’re at a concert or the farmer’s market, views to videos just get viewed more often on Facebook and Instagram. Better yet, share it to your Stories and let your crush hear your voice.

14. Swap Digits So You Can Meet IRL.

At the end of this love campaign, if you and your crush are in a groove on Instagram, it’s time to take the plunge and send a DM with your phone number to text each other and make plans to meet in person. After all, you won’t really know if you have offline chemistry until you meet IRL.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s the Digital Matchmaker who’s been coaching singles online for over 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Instagram and Twitter

SIGN UP for the Free Weekly Flirt for dating advice delivered to your inbox

Your Guide to Cuffing Season – Get Ready to Couple Up

via GIPHY

Hello Cuffing Season

In case you haven’t heard of ‘Cuffing Season,’ it’s the time of the year, usually from the beginning of Fall to February 15th when the weather is cooler, and when couples decide to become exclusive and find a significant other for the big holidays; Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s, and Valentine’s Day.

During the first week in October when the weather changes, summer romances have faded, kids are back in school, the leaves start falling, and Halloween costumes appear in the stores, it’s a time where the desire to couple up starts to appear and continues to grow.

Some call it Pre-Cuffing Season right now. In my experience as a dating coach and online dating expert, cuffing season just seems to start earlier and earlier each year.

Cuffing Season Defined

Urban Dictionary defines ‘Cuffing Season’ as “Usually the colder months; i.e. fall or winter, when new relationships start and old relationships turn into engagements. The persons in said relationships are ‘cuffed,’ meaning that they no longer seek non-platonic relationships with others.”

For those who are finding themselves single, don’t be surprised if an old flame reappears, even if it was someone who had ghosted you.

During Cuffing Season, guys go back into old text messages on their phones, re-review their matches on Tinder or Bumble dating apps, and sign up for online dating sites to subconsciously start or restart a relationship.

5 Ways to Find a New Relationship This Fall

via GIPHY

With the change of seasons, brings an opportunity for a new beginning for many.

  1. Accept party and business invitations and force yourself to go.
  2. Smile wherever you go out in public. It’s contagious in a good way.
  3. Refresh your mobile dating and online dating profiles with new photos and a new bio.
  4. Engage with people you find interesting on Facebook who are single.
  5. Flirt on Instagram and other social media channels.

With the tragic shooting in Las Vegas, there’s been an unusual need to hug one another. If you’re in a relationship that’s new, you could want to feel closer, to feel protected, and to want to express your love to that person a bit sooner than you might have had.

So if you’re looking to kiss someone special under the mistletoe this holiday season, don’t wait until November 1st to focus on love.

As a dating and relationship expert and coach, I encourage you to take the covers off your head, go out with a big smile on your face and be approachable, as it really can be an exciting time for love. Sipping hot toddies or hot chocolate by the fireplace is a visual you just might want to be a participant in. Party invites from business networking events are starting to pile in, so RSVP and fill up your date card.

If you’re in a toxic relationship or one that makes you anxious or are walking on eggshells, it’s time to get out. Staying in a bad relationship just for the holidays prevents you from finding someone more compatible to create new memories with. The possibilities are endless!

If you need any hand holding, check out our Irresistible Profiles packages to help speed up your search.

Happy Cuffing Season.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Cuffing Season

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She has been helping singles find love on the Internet for over 20 years. Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and instagram for dating advice and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Find out how Irresistible Profiles will help you find your dream date during Cuffing Season.

 

How to Fall in Love This Fall Using Your Eyes

Flirt Using Eyes

 

Welcome Fall! There’s nothing more exciting than the change of seasons, and the possibilities of falling in love during fall leading into the holidays.

There are endless articles on how to fall in love using words, eyes, flirting gestures, using your sense of humor, but did you know you can fall in love just by staring at someone’s eyes?

Once upon a time ago, two people fell in love at first sight just by using their eyes. One of the two, was myself! There was something about this gentleman’s eyes that captured my attention. I kept staring at him and then turning my head away quickly, a bit nervously. When we finally started talking after 20 minutes of staring at each others eyes and smiling, it turned out we had the exact same colored eyes.

I wrote about that experience in my first published book  and know first-hand that this can actually work.

Perhaps I can say we fell in love at first eye-sight. Research has backed up this theory that you can fall in love with someone just through eye contact.

Then again, there are songs about eyes, such as, You’re Too Good to be True, Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You, Brown Eyed Girl, Green Eyes Lady, These Eyes, Spanish Eyes, and the list goes on.

Research and instinct prove that both men and women are visual. Either the see something shiny or someone attractive that they like, or they don’t. This is why popular dating apps such as Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge are so popular and singles are swiping right in record numbers.

At Cyber-Dating Expert, we recommend that you ditch those sunglasses in your online dating profiles and mobile apps, and make sure your potential date can stare into your sparkling eyes.

Here are 31 facts on how to flirt with your eyes

  1. When two people in love gaze into each others’ eyes, their heartbeats synchronize with each other.
  2. Your eyes dilate almost 50% wider when you look at someone you love or fancy.
  3. When flirting, a woman will look at someone, then quickly look away and wait 30 seconds if she’s interested.
  4. Perfect vision makes it easier to fall in love at first sight.
  5. Gazing straight into a stranger’s eyes can make them fall in love.
  6. Rapid blinking may mean someone is attracted to you.
  7. Women will find a man attractive if another woman is looking at smiling at him.
  8. When someone who finds you attractive locks eyes with you, they automatically go up a notch on your love barometer.
  9. Sparkling eyes show strong emotions.
  10. People with a strong connection of love hold eye contact for longer periods of time.

Plus 21 more fun facts in this Infographic below.

Flirting Eyes Infographic

 
Courtesy of: Optilase.com
 
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of Internet and mobile dating, and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

Sign up for the free Weekly Flirt Newsletter.

How to Find a Date With a Sense of Humor

Everyone wants to date someone who’s funny and has a great sense of humor, right?

I’ve viewed countless online dating profiles that require that their match have a great sense of humor, or admit that they’re funny, but how can you tell without hearing their voice or meeting IRL?

You may of heard about the The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts from Gary Chapman’s bestselling book. It’s a terrific read and helps you to identify your love language to communicate better with your significant other, but did you know there different humor types that help you find a compatible date while looking for love online?

eHarmony Tested 6 Types of Humor

Our friends at eHarmony decided to put humor to the test. In a survey of over 1500 members, they got to view gifs and memes to rate which humor type they were the most comfortable with.

The humor categories, ranked in order are as follows:

  1. Physical Humor 
  2. Bodily Humor
  3. Self-Deprecating Humor
  4. Wordplay Humor
  5. Surreal Humor
  6. Dark Humor

In the study, it revealed that not all types of humor are created equally.

It came to no surprise that physical humor ranked at the top of the dating humor totem pole, closely followed by bodily humor.

I spoke with Jonathan Beber, eHarmony’s Senior Research Scientist, who pointed out that participants who found Wordplay humor the funniest, sent out more messages than those who weren’t fans of Wordplay.

“Sharing a similar style of humor with a romantic partner could lead to more chemistry and better relationship quality during the course of the length of the relationship,” said Beber.

Dark humor was favored the least by those who participated in the study, where online and in digital conversations, the dark humor probably came off as creepy or insulting.

Women found self-deprecating humor, where they made fun of themselves and their shortcomings, significantly funnier than the men who were surveyed.

How do you find someone with a great sense of humor?

As a dating coach, my best advice is to show your sense of humor and be willing to laugh at yourself.

  1. In your profile, make a joke and promise your potential date you can make them laugh.
  2. Hop on a phone call,  joke around, and keep the conversation light and fun.
  3. Meet quickly to see if you click. If your dark humor is a turn-off to someone, it’s better to find out sooner, rather than later.
  4. Remember that laughter is the best medicine. Say you’ll bring over chicken soup on demand if they’re under the weather.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of Internet dating and has been helping singles find love online and on their mobile phones for over 20 years.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram

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Watch Online Dating Expert Julie Spira in The Lonely Italian Movie

Lonely ItalianWe’re excited to share the release of The Lonely Italian movie with our readers.

For those of you who have dated online, you know that often dates are filled with mishaps, hysterical stories, or ones where you hope to click and get to a second date.

The star of the film, Domenico Nesci, just can’t get to a second date because he keeps getting in the way. This is why he needs a dating coach.

Here’s an excerpt from The Lonely Italian, where online dating expert Julie Spira helps Domenico Nesci, set up his profile by selecting the photos.

Domenico, being a funny guy, had a few profile photos that would make everyone SWIPE LEFT.

You can order and watch the full feature film here and get ready to laugh out loud.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and mobile dating expert. She’s an award-winning dating coach and the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert, where she’s been helping singles find love online for almost 25 years with her Irresistible Profiles programs.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram for dating advice.

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