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Digital Manners and Dating

In a recent interview with CNN’s Karin Caifa, we talked about digital etiquette for Valentine’s Day.

With courtship getting digital, here are some dos and don’ts on posting your date or romantic rendezvous on social media.

Some of the tips include:

  • Do put that smart phone down. It sends a bad message to your date that maybe there?s someone more important than the person sitting across the table from you.
  • Don’t post all of those early date details on Twitter or Facebook.
  • Do share very little about what’s going on with your your new beau in the early stages of the relationship.
  • Don’t lose friends and followers by over sharing your relationship details.
  • Do keep in mind who might be on your sweetheart’s list of Facebook friends. Coworkers, a boss, family members, even parents. Those wall posts that you think are sweet could be embarrassing to your Valentine.
  • Don’t post your play-by-play every hour about your romantic rendezvous including arriving at the hotel, seeing the flowers in the room, going to dinner, or sipping champagne.

Remember, in a new relationship, he may still be dating others, you may be dating others, and you’re not ready to become “Facebook Exclusive,” until you’ve had the talk.

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and netiquette expert. She’s the author of The Rules of Netiquette: How to Mind Your Digital Manners and The Perils of Cyber-Dating.

For more digital dating advice, visit CyberDatingExpert.com, where you can sign up for the Weekly Flirt newsletter, Facebook.com/RulesofNetiquette and Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert. Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.

5 Texting Tips to Help Improve Your Relationship

Texting Tips

Digital love — Should texting be a part of your dating life?

According to a Rice University study, both men and women are sending text messages to their S.O.s.

In a recent article on Prevention.com, I shared tips and texting advice to help spice up your love life, along with a few precautions to make sure you don?t end up in the digital doghouse.

1. DON’T overdo it. Sending a simple happy face to your loved one can be a fun and flirty way to brighten up their day, but the overuse of emoticons reduces the effectiveness. In other words, if every message you send is punctuated with a smile or a wink, your partner will find it harder to figure out what you’re really feeling. (And off-topic but related: The overuse of exclamation marks, especially by men, is a turn-off.)

2. DO embrace the quick hello. I?m a big fan of sending a good morning text to your sweetheart. It never hurts to add ‘xoxo’ at the end to put a smile on his face.

3. DON’T send explicit photos. Even if you haven’t been a teenager for decades, sending naked photos via texting can still come back to haunt you. This is the biggest mistake women make. I can’t stress enough that anything you send digitally can and will be shared by others.

4. DO use it for quick updates. Texting is tailor-made for confirming plans or giving a status update to someone who’s waiting on you. If you’re running late for a date or appointment, you should always send a text to let the other party know.

5. DON’T text angry, ever. The problem with relying on text messages is you can?t hear the sound of someone’s voice. A text message sent in jest may be received as hurtful, and cause a fight. If you find a text exchange veering into argument territory, that’s the time to switch over to a phone call or talking in person. Do sleep on it. Just because you can send a text doesn’t mean you should especially if it concerns your relationship. If you have to get something off your chest, send it to yourself (and only to yourself!) in an email and sleep on it. You might feel differently about it in the morning.

Read full article at PreventionMagazine.com

Julie Spira is an online dating and netiquette expert. She?s the author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online and The Rules of Netiquette: How to Mind Your Manners on the Web.

For more dating and relationship advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.

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