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National Grammar Day – Why Grammar Matters in Dating

 

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We’ve all gotten one of these grammatical travesties from an online crush before, either on a mobile dating app or via text.  It’s one of those dreadful parts of dating, right?

In honor of National Grammar Day, we’re here to help you with your digital love life.

Proper grammar is one of the most important aspects for singles on dating sites. Did you know that nearly half of singles consider poor spelling and grammar to be a huge deal breaker?

Before you add in that extra emoticon, we’re here to help raise awareness on “National Grammar Day” to help you find love online and IRL.

According to a recent study by Zoosk, a majority of singles (72%) are turned off by blatant spelling errors, and nearly 1/4 think poor grammar means you’re chatting with someone who is uneducated or not so smart. As far as punctuation goes, of the 9,441 respondents to the Zoosk survey, 93% of singles would be happy if they received a text message with proper punctuation.

The study also found that response rates for opening messages sent with an exclamation point are 10% higher than average!

Separately, eHarmony teamed up with Grammarly, the world’s leading online proofreader, to conduct a grammar study to analyze poor grammar in dating profiles. After looking at 10,000 profiles from both men and women, Grammarly found that women make almost twice as many grammatical errors per every 100 words than men do, but are less likely to be judged by men for their grammatical errors.

As little as two spelling errors on a profile can reduce a guy’s chance of getting a response by 14%, but women’s spelling and grammar errors didn’t have an impact on their chances at a response at all.

Here are a few tips on how to clean up your online dating profile and communication so that you won’t experience any grammar faux pas that could get in the way of attracting a digital crush.

Related: Rules of Netiquette: Love and Grammar

1. Use Exclamation Points!

As found in the Zoosk study, using an exclamation point can increase your chances of getting a response. Try “Hi Stacy!” instead of “Hi Stacy…” for a more positive reaction.

2. Proper Punctuation

Ending sentences with proper punctuation is actually preferred, even though some may think ending a text message with a period could come off as aggressive.  Another important piece of punctuation to remember is the Oxford comma. Trust us (and Grammarly) that there’s a difference between “I love cooking my family and my dog” and “I love cooking, my family, and my dog.”

3. YOMAFIO (You Only Make a First Impression Once) and LOL

Zoosk’s study found that using the acronym “YOLO,” meaning “you only live once,” decreases response rates by 47% and they recommended that you drop it from your dating vocabulary. However, “LOL” passed the test, as it increased responses by 25%.

Related: National Punctuation Day: Dating and Grammar

4. Your vs. You’re

We all remember the lesson we got from Ross Geller on that one episode of Friends (specifically, The One With The Jellyfish). There’s a very important difference between “your” and “you’re.” The differences between there, their, and they’re, or then and than, as well as to and too are also very important to know.

5. Take Your Time

Smartphones have a full keyboard and unlimited characters, so there’s no reason not to spell out what you want to say. Using shortcuts, like “u” in place of “you,” shows that you don’t care to take the time to write out a full sentence. You don’t want your potential date to feel like you’re too lazy to properly communicate with them. Beware of auto-correct, as it can bite you in the digital tush and make the smartest of singles seem a bit dumber on a good day.

Remember to always put your best digital foot forward and take the time to spell out what you want to say and your spelling and grammar will help you charm your way into your online love’s heart.

Happy National Grammar Day!

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years. Julie’s the author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating and The Rules of Netiquette.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram. Sign up for our Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Dating Profile Photos to Rock His World

Dating Found - HER

Turn to the left and smile? Sunglasses on, or off? Cleavage or cover up?

What are the best photos for your Irresistible online dating profile to capture his digital eye?

Finding the right photos for your online dating profile can be tough. Ladies, if you’ve ever wondered which photos are the best ones to put on your online dating profile, the guys have spoken up to state their faves.

In a recent online dating experiment by DatingFound, 3,570 single men were asked to rate the attractiveness of women’s Internet dating profiles, by rating their profile photos on a scale of 1 to 10.

Here’s how the photos ranked in popularity.

Showing Skin

Almost half of the men in the survey (41% ) said they liked to see a woman showing some flesh in her online dating profile. Women showing off cleavage by wearing low-cut tops and dresses in their profile pictures scored high for younger women. For those more mature in age, guys preferred to see a more conservative look, keeping a little mystery alive.

Even though pictures showing more skin result in more messages from digital crushes, you don’t want to look as  though that’s the only thing you have to offer. Remember – no bikini shots!

Happy Girls are a Complete Turn On

This survey found that 39% of men like the look of a woman who smiles in her profile pics.

Smiles can turn strangers into soulmates, so make sure you look happy in your profile photos. Happiness creates trust and approach-oriented behaviors in single men and increases your attractiveness.

Remember to flirt! A smiling profile picture is perfect because it appears as if you’re smiling at the viewer and men will respond enthusiastically.

Don’t Just Use Your Head Shots

Professional head shots look great in an online dating profile, but 11% of men like when a woman shows something they love. Appeal to men by putting your personality on display and show your fun side.

Take pictures that show your lifestyle. A shot of you reading a book, playing a guitar, cooking, golfing, yoga, or doing an activity you do regularly appeals to men.

Related: Creating an Irresistible Online Dating Profile Tips

Show Off Your Best (Left) Side

It’s been proven that we show more emotion from the left side of our face, and showing our left side in photos can create deeper resonance in those who view them.

Nine percent of men liked it  when a woman showed her left side in photos. Left-side photos are also more pleasing to the eye as they change up the viewing angle from a straight-on view.

P.S. This goes both ways, as women also liked viewing photos of men with their left side.

Which Photo Should You Show First?

You should have one of each of these photos on your profile to get the most possible messages from your matches.

  1. Start with a photo of you showing off a little skin to capture attention.
  2. Can you say cheese? Post smiling happy photos (both close up and full body).
  3. Fun photos with activities that you’re passionate about.
  4. Left side poses.

Which Photos Should You Never Use?

  1. Avoid sunglasses as it could appear that you’re hiding something. Let him see your sparkling eyes.
  2. Avoid group photos with your friends. Don’t confuse a guy by making him wonder who he will be meeting on the date.
  3. Ditch the selfies. Need we say more? You just don’t look your best and it sends the message that it’s all about you.
  4. Keep your pets out of your primary photo shot. Most of us love puppies and pets, but posting your first photo with your four-legged friend sends the message that your puppy sleeps in bed with you. Where’s the room for your new beau?

Related: Puppy Love: Dating Sites Match Pet Lovers

The full DatingFound infographic can be found here.

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. For more dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, sign up for our Weekly Flirt and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.

Find out how our Irresistible Profiles will help you find your dream date.

JUST RELEASED: Our 2nd edition of The Perils of Cyber-Dating is now available on Kindle and as an audio book, narrated by the author.

Listen to our book trailer here.

Puppy Love: Dating Sites Match Pet Lovers

Puppy Love“And the called it puppy love.”

You might remember that song from the Donny Osmond hit. There’s some truth to the fact that puppy love exists in your hearts and in your homes.

When it comes to dating, “niche” online dating sites and mobile apps will help pet lovers find other pet lovers, to make a marriage made in pet heaven.

Please View in Safari or click this link to view video

In a Match survey, they found that singles love pets, with 64% saying they own a pet.

In this television interview, I shared my thoughts on dating sites for pet lovers.

As a dating expert and coach who has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years, I’ve seen first hand how online dating has changed with these new niche dating sites. I’m a big proponent of pet themed sites.

“Niche dating sites such as Date my Pet and Pet People Meet are now available to singles.”

“When we’re looking at blending a family, guess what, you’re blending your pets as well.”

As a dating ice-breaker, I suggested a pet-themed date for dog and cat owners.

“I love having dates at dog parks. I think it’s just a very relaxing way to get to know someone without any pressure. It’s like the coffee date, only you’re bringing your pet.”

In my book, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online, in Chapter 14,  I wrote about ‘The Boy Next Door.” He had a rescue dog, who joined his dates for dinner in the dining room every night. It was important for this man to see if his dog and his date were compatible. This is common, as pet lovers might take their dogs or cats on vacation with them.

Related: Single Man Poses as Dog on Tinder

If you are allergic to cats or dogs, I highly recommend you mention it in your online dating profiles. However, don’t post a primary shot with your pets. Leave those to secondary photos in your mobile dating or Internet dating profiles.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Related: Man’s Best Friend Plays Matchmaker

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years.

Sign up for the free Weekly Flirt for dating advice and find out about Irresistible Profiles to attract your dream date.

College Kids and Grandparents Rush to Online Dating

Online Dating ProfileLooking for Love Online?

A new Pew Research Center study was released in time for Valentine’s with good news for daters both young and old. Your chances of finding a date or a soul mate have increased dramatically just in the past two years.

A new Pew Research Center study among 2,001 adults from June 10-July 12, 2015, has found that online dating has nearly tripled for singles 18-24 and more than doubled for singles 55-64.

Largest Users of Online and Mobile Dating are Young Americans 18-24

According to the survey, young Americans 18-24 now make up the largest percentage of users to online dating sites and mobile dating apps, with most of them using mobile dating apps that weren’t around when the survey was taken two years ago.

Pew Research Study

Attitudes Towards Online Dating Continue to be Favorable

The good news is that 80% of those who have used online dating sites agree that online dating is a good way to meet people. Say goodbye to the stigma and hello to finding love online. At Cyber-Dating Expert, we’ve been coaching singles from college-age to baby boomers for years now, so we are pleased to see the research back up our own work.

Some of the reasons for the growth in acceptance to online dating is that it allows singles to find a better match by meeting a lot of people, and it has become an efficient way of meeting someone new.

We know that Tinder has led the way for mobile dating app use for singles 18-24, who are constantly attached to their smartphones. We know they often swipe right, without paying attention to the photos on the screen. Yet, if you ask any single person now, they’ll be comfortable in letting you know that they are using a mobile dating app.

Pew Research 2016

The Whole Family is Dating Online Now, Well, Almost

What’s interesting to note is that their single or divorced parents are looking for love online now in record numbers as well. 

With many baby boomers becoming single by divorce or the death of a spouse, they are finding online dating a source of hope in getting back out there in the dating world, a world where mobile apps didn’t exist while they were raising their kids.

So if you’re at the dining room table and you’ll probably notice that both mom and her kids are swiping left and right to fill their date cards.

Full survey results at Pew Research Center

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter for dating advice

Sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt

 

Netflix and Love: Will Your Netflix “Showmance” Last?

Screen Shot 2016-02-10 at 11.50.25 AM

If date night consists of binge watching Breaking Bad or Orange is the New Black with your date, you’re not alone.

Netflix released the results of a survey of 1,008 American Netflix users between the ages of 18 and 29 to find out what Netflix meant in their relationship with their significant other. According to the results, 25% of people get “Show Goggles” and find their crushes or significant others more attractive based on the shows they watch.

Compatibility is also very important, not just in your relationship, but in your show preferences. 27% insist that show compatibility is very important, which makes a lot of sense. If your S.O. won’t binge Archer with, how are you supposed to be together?

So how do you know if you’ll be binge watch compatible? For starters, post your favorite TV shows in your online dating profile to see if you have shows in common with a potential date. With over 1/2 of those surveyed using TV show titles to attract a date, make sure to use those keywords where you can, including listing the show on the 6 things you can’t live without on OkCupid, or stating it in your Match or POF profile.

 

Making Your Relationship “Netflix Official”

I’ll admit, my ex-boyfriend and I had a Netflix love affair. I still have the password to his account and with his permission am able to continue viewing shows as my leisure.  A majority of respondents (51%) agreed that sharing a Netflix password means that the relationship is serious, while 17% won’t share a password until they’re engaged.

Screen Shot 2016-02-10 at 11.50.41 AM

Date Night Decisions

Staying in and watching Netflix together is a great way to spend a casual date night. Over 1/2 of those surveyed said they use Netflix as a way to bond with their significant other.

If you’ve ever negotiated over shows with your boyfriend or girlfriend, know that you’re not alone. 65% of respondents engage in negotiations over which show to watch, and 35% trade show for show.

Screen Shot 2016-02-10 at 11.50.55 AM
Remember: Couples that stream together, dream together.

Infographic courtesy of Netflix. View full infographic here.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

The Perils of Cyber-Dating

Newly released: Our completely revised edition of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Now available as an audio book in Audible and on Kindle. Listen to the magical epilogue with the fairy tale ending to help you believe in love.

Happn Dating App Adds Voice Feature

HappnThey say you can fall in love with someone, just from hearing their voice.

At Cyber-Dating Expert, we  listed Happn as one of our favorite mobile dating apps to use in 2016.

As reported in Business Insider, Happn, the app that sends you notifications if you happen to cross paths with someone in your neighborhood or favorite watering hall, has added a new voice feature to their mobile dating app.

Happn now has 10 million members and is growing in popularity, hoping to catch up to Tinder, as their release shows they expect to reach 30 million users by the end of 2016.

Happn co-founder and CEO Didier Rappaport said in a statement: “This new voice feature provides our members with another opportunity to connect on a more personal level and create meaningful relationships.”

Rappaport added:

“The voice is something that is very emotional,” the French entrepreneur continued. “Just listening to the voice of someone else can give you a lot of impression.”

If you’re worried about your safety, don’t fret. You can only use the voice feature when both people agree to do so.

As mobile dating apps continue to grow in popularity, we will continue to keep you posted on new apps to shorten the search to help you find your dream date.

Here’s our review of Happn.

Happn Happn – Android, iOs, Windows Phone

Remember Craig’s List Missed Connections? Happn is a more modern day approach to matching with someone you’ve already crossed paths with, but never really connected. Every time you pass by a spot with another member IRL, you’ll get an instant push notification that another member is nearby and boom, you can meet instantly. Some may find it very efficient. Others may think it’s creepy, and might not want to meet after a sweaty yoga class. But then again, they wouldn’t be on this app if that were the case, so go ahead and be spontaneous. If you think you might miss out on a digital crush who hangs in the same h0od as you, but are on the shy side, this app is for you. Note: The app was created in France and is available in 25 cities around the world. They are starting to expand in the U.S. and may not have rolled out in your city yet.

How it works: Download the app and log in to Facebook, where yo can edit which information in your Facebook profile that you want to appear in your bio. You must enable your location services for the app to work. Every time you cross paths with another member, it will appear on your timeline feed. You can like someone’s profile by tapping on the heart button. If the feeling is mutual, you’ll be notified and you’ll be considered in the crush stage. You can also view how many times your paths have crossed. If you want to take it a step further, men can pay to to send a charm. There is no cost to women at this point. Charms are similar to Tinder’s “Super Like” feature, except you buy them in a package. Each charm is equal to using one credit.

Why we like it: You won’t have to wonder about the one who got away. You can also now sync with Instagram to see your potential date’s feeds and interests.

Are you using Happn?

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert, where she’s been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.

NEW: JUST RELEASED: The audio book version of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Now available on Audible and Amazon.

Listen to our Book Trailer here:

Julie Spira to Speak at iDate

idate 2016It’s an honor to be a featured speaker at the Internet Dating Conference, iDate-2016 to be held in Miami, Florida on January 25 – 27th.

iDate is the online dating and mobile dating industry conference with executives from online dating sites and matchmakers who will meet to discuss the latest industry trends.

Cyber-Dating Expert has been attending the iDate conference for the past eight years and is a proud sponsor of the Internet Dating Conference.

Click here to buy tickets

We all know that online dating is a HOT topic in the news.  My panel, Managing the Headlines: How to Get Press will be held on Wednesday, January 27th at 2pm at the Kovens Conference Center in Miami, USA in room 110.  My presentation will immediately follow the session, Match.com Going Public and Projected Forecasts for the Dating Industries, presented by Mark Brools of Courtland Brooks and Alex Harrington from Snap Interactive.

In my session, we’ll discuss the hottest news stories of the past year. I’ll talk about which headlines to respond to and which ones to avoid to show your business in the best light. From Tinder pro to Valentine’s Day, I’ll be sharing my secrets on how I became a top online dating expert and go-to person in the media, having been featured in over 650 news stories on the subjects of Internet dating and mobile dating.

I’ll also be presenting the award for Best Mobile Dating App at the iDate Awards on January 26th, so grab your tux and gown and head on down to Miami.

Join me at iDate in Miami. You can purchase your tickets here to save $75 on your registration.

Julie Spira Cyber Dating Expert on Managing The Headlines at iDate 2016 Dating Business Super Conference VIDEO.

Follow me on Twitter @JulieSpira, where I’ll be sending out live updates from iDate-2016.

The Busiest Day for Online Dating is Sunday, January 3

Dating Sunday Jan 3
Take a deep digital breath and get ready for the world’s largest digital dating party.

This Sunday, January 3rd will be the busiest day of the year for online dating. Are ready for the ride?

Every year, the Sunday after New Year’s is a reflective time for singles. Perhaps you were flying solo on New Year’s or were in a relationship that ran it’s course.

Either way, it’s time for a new beginning and the huge amount of new memberships to online dating sites will happen on the Sunday after New Year’s Eve.

Match reports that 24% more signups will occur on #DatingSunday with 8:52pm/ET being the most active time of the day. They see a 60% spike in new singles searching for love during peak season. With one million new dates happening during this period, those are numbers worth bragging about.

PlentyofFish expects 81,000 signups on Sunday and are expecting 2 million signups in the month of January. Singles who join during the first week of January, will find their partner an average of two weeks faster than those who sign up later, taking an average of just 10 weeks compared to an average of 12 weeks throughout the year.

At Cyber-Dating Expert, our phone has been ringing and the text messages have been flying. We know that it’s peak season now through Valentine’s Day, so grab your smartphone and download the latest mobile dating apps and get ready to fill your date card!

On the Match blog, I wrote about the peak dating period between Christmas and Valentine’s Day.

Here are some of the reasons why January 3rd is the busiest day of the year for digital dating.

Sunday is the most active day.

All year round at the end of the weekend on Sunday nights, it’s the busiest time for singles logging into dating sites. If your weekend date was so-so (or you were dateless), logging on to chat, flirt, and browse means opportunities to fill up your date card and start the week anew are plentiful. Multiply this big time with the start of a New Year, and you’ll see the activity soar.

A disappointing holiday can make you feel blue.

Emotions around Christmastime and New Year’s are at an all-time high if you’re single. Watching your friends post lovey-dovey shots on Facebook and Instagram or change their status to “In a Relationship” or “Engaged” can hit a nerve, big-time. It’s enough to make you scream, “Bah, humbug” and turn off both your computer and phone to unplug, but just temporarily.

Holiday breakups are high.

Some people stay in dead-end relationships so they won’t be alone through the holidays. It’s a dreadful feeling to know that you’re with someone you can’t see yourself going the distance with long-term. Thoughts of another New Year’s Eve with that feeling isn’t something you’ll want to repeat. Often, couples will break up right after the New Year, or even before Christmas, in order to not to go through another holiday with the wrong person. It’s normal for relationships to run their course, but when it happens at the holidays, it brings a whole new group of fabulous singles to the dating party at the first of the year. There’s a reason they say, “Out with the old, in with the new” at New Year’s.

If you find yourself in the middle of a break up, read my article on The Huffington Post, How to Break Up Gracefully.

New Year’s resolutions include finding love.

New Year’s Day is on a Friday this year. It’s the beginning of a quiet weekend and a time to reflect about the past year and come up with a list of goals for 2016. After watching football games and going to New Year’s Day parties solo, singles often think about new beginnings. From joining a gym to going on a diet, the list often includes finding someone to have a meaningful relationship with.

The squeaky wheel gets the digital love deal.

During peak dating season, Match reports that about 50 million messages are sent. Think about it. Wouldn’t you be happy to receive at least 10 of those emails from someone you could have chemistry with? Rather than sitting back and waiting for your inbox to fill up, remember that the more engaged you are, the greater chance you’ll have to fill up your date card. That means logging on several times a day so your profile stays active, viewing your daily matches every day and liking and messaging other members to start a convo, right now.

READ: Mobile Dating Apps You Must be Using in 2016

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Join Match.com with our 20% off promo code.

Find out how Swiping Right and Irresistible Profiles can help you find your dream date.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook and sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Singles Holiday Dating Survival Guide

Holiday Dating survival guide

Baby it’s cold outside! It’s that time of year when holiday invites are pouring in and your single status might make you want to hide under the covers.

It’s safe to say that emotions are flying high during the holidays for singles, new couples not sure how to define themselves, those who have had a recent breakup, and those who are tired of hearing from their relatives about their relationship status.

The holiday period from Thanksgiving to New Year’s brings up a lot of emotions. In the words of Fleetwood Mac’s Stevie Nicks from the song Dreams, it’s natural to think of memories of what you had and what you lost. The band also sings about how “You make loving fun” so don’t turn down the volume just yet. Listening to music this time of year can give you both strength and send you down memory lane.

One thing I know for sure, is my phone is ringing with singles wanting to connect and meet someone new to share the holidays with, so there are plenty of singles looking for love online now.

Still, I know how tough it is at the holidays being single. I’ve been there. I’ve been watching the abundance of posts on Facebook of couples who are changing their relationship status to “In a Relationship.” If your status isn’t that in that category, it can be a digital stab to your heart.

I’m here to tell you that this is actually the best time of year to meet someone wonderful to date. Filling your date card with quality people is quite possible, so take away that frown and look at my tips in our holiday survival guide.

The Cyber-Dating Expert Survival Guide to Help you Through the Holidays, Online and IRL.

1. Don’t rely on Social Media to go down memory lane

Sure I know it’s natural to take a peek to see what your ex is up to, but if they’re jetting off to Paris, heading for sunshine in Hawaii and kissing under the mistletoe, you’re hurting yourself big time. Instead, try to create your own new memories. Walk down a festively decorated street and snap a few photos of trees, store windows, and cheerful pictures and post them on your Facebook wall. So what if you’re alone or with your BFF. You’re out of the house and not living in the past. Digital snooping is also on the rise, especially during the holidays. It brings out the worst in many. At PlentyofFish, they surveyed over 9000 of their users between the ages of 20 -40 to find out what their holiday dating habits were. POF found that 82% of the women were actually checking the Facebook statuses of guys they were dating to see what they were doing when they weren’t around. Wouldn’t you be better off out, than attached to your phone?

2. Fill that date card and stay organized

Anxiety can be at an all time high, but joining a few dating sites and using mobile dating apps will be a great ego boost. It will also give you the chance to meet a lot of people. However, don’t embarrass yourself by calling Don, Doug or introduce yourself as Jackie from PlentyOfFish if you met him on eHarmony. The easiest way to do this is by creating an excel spreadsheet and logging your conversations. You would do this for a job, right? Well this is a job with a possibility of a lifetime of love. It’s worth the effort.

3. Block your ex’s profile

If you’ve recently ended a relationship with someone you met online and it wasn’t on good terms, chances are you’ve both rejoined the site to meet others. Make sure you block his or her profile so they don’t appear in a search and to avoid the obsessiveness that results when you check to see when they last logged on or if they’ve deactivated their profile. Don’t assume if their profile is gone that they’ve ridden off into the sunset with someone else. Sometimes people just take a break or they may have blocked you.

4. Don’t jump into a rebound relationship

They say the easiest way to get over someone is by replacing them in a New York minute with someone new, but is it right? Sure the initial infatuation stage is a lot of fun and it’s nice to have a warm body around, but finding someone new when you aren’t ready to date isn’t always the answer. Spend time with friends, hang out with an ex that you’re still on good terms with and can be yourself with, and spend time alone reading, writing, or taking a cooking class or French lesson.

5. Discuss holiday gift giving

Before you run off to Tiffany to get him sterling silver cufflinks engraved with his initials after three weeks of dating, ask yourself how overwhelming it would feel if he showed up with an engagement ring one month in. It could be over the top, right? Come up with a reasonable budget. Perhaps you can get him a cashmere scarf or sweater, tickets to a concert or sporting event, and make home made cookies. You could get her a gift certificate to a spa, gourmet chocolates, a fun accessory for her mobile phone, tickets to a show or a museum exhibition, or a piece of costume jewelry in her favorite color. Avoid giving her just lingerie, unless it’s something she picks out for herself.

READ: THIS IS THE TOP GIFT FOR SINGLES

6. It’s Peak Season for Online Daters

The good news is that more singles are signing up for dating sites between Thanksgiving and Valentine’s Day. Match reports they see a jump of about 25-30% in new members signing up between Christmas and Valentine’s Day and at Cyber-Dating Expert, it’s the busiest holiday season ever with new singles joining online dating sites and brand new dating profiles being created.

READ: 5 TIPS TO FINDING LOVE ONLINE

7. Swipe Right

I know you’re attached to your mobile phone. Perhaps you’re waiting for a text from that cutie you had a date with last week. Maybe you’re swiping left to every potential match. I say, take a chance and swipe right more than left. Even if he or she won’t be your dream date, they might invite you to a holiday party or introduce you to a friend. It’s time to cast a wide net.

8. Accept ALL holiday invitations

If your inbox is filled with invitations for holiday mixers, fill your calendar and put on your party dress. Remember to smile at everyone. Business networking events are in abundance now, so you won’t have to feel that you’re the only single person there. Walk in with confidence and you’ll be turning heads and filling your date card.

9. Online Love is a year-round event

People meet online and fall in love all year long. I know a couple that met online on Christmas Eve on Facebook who are now engaged. I know of another couple that met online on eHarmony on Valentine’s Day who are now happily married. One couple fell in love at first sight that met on Match. She hadn’t had a serious relationship in over 10 years and now they’re married. Yes online dating is a numbers game. You’ll be juggling dates, canceling dates, rescheduling dates, it’s exhausting, but it can be so very rewarding as it has been for millions of others.

READ: HOW TO FLIRT ON INSTAGRAM

10. Fall in love with you

At the holidays, please take a deep breath; log on to fill your date card if and when it feels good to you, not because you’re feeling lonely. If you need to take a break from dating, that’s fine. There are no rules, other than to fall in love with yourself first. It’s the best place to be to start any new relationship.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace this holiday season, or wherever you may roam.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years.  She’s the CEO of CyberDatingExpert.com, author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. She creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene and helps them shorten their search to find their one in 50 million.

For online dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

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Hello December! 5 Tips to Finding Love Online

Finding Love in December - Julie SpiraHappy December my #Tweethearts.

My how time flies! It’s hard to believe that we are in the final month of the year, the month where we celebrate with friends and loved ones, decorate our homes, and fill our calendars with holiday parties.

December is also the time of year where singles want to couple up BIG time and looking for love online is at the top of the list.

I shared in a previous blog the article in the New York Post, where a survey from our friends at Match showed that the number one gift for singles is…. a date. Yes indeed. Finding a date for the holidays ranked higher than picking out the latest tech gadget.

With that in mind, here are 5 online and mobile dating tips to help you find love and your one in 50 million online.

 

  • Swipe Right. Yes. Apps like Tinder are responsible for some serious relationships, so ditch your old thoughts about hookups only with mobile dating apps and start swiping right.

 

 

  • Favorite your Digital Crush. Online dating is a numbers game, but it’s so easy to get lost in the digital shuffle. To stand out, Super Like your match on Tinder, say yes to your daily matches on Match, and favorite or hot list someone to get their attention

 

 

  • Don’t Wait. Initiate. Just because someone viewed your profile, doesn’t mean you should sit back and wait for the email to arrive. To fill your date card, you MUST be proactive. That means logging in daily, seeing who viewed your profile, and writing to 5-10 new people a day.

 

 

  • Snap New Photos. While your Facebook and Instagram profiles are up-to-date with fresh new photos, your online dating profile just might need a digital face-lift. The first place to start is with the photos. Grab a few from your social networking sites or better yet, enlist the help from a friend who has a great digital camera. Snap 100 photos in 5 different outfits and have a photo selection party with your BFFs. They’ll help you select the best pics. P.S. Remember to wear red and ditch the little black dress. Red is the color of love, passion, and the stop sign. It’s also the signature color for the holidays.

 

 

  • Meet IRL. The point of Internet dating isn’t to have a digital pen-pal. It’s to meet someone amazing who you click with, who you can think about every morning when you wake up. You can’t find him or her if you don’t take your relationship from online to offline. Schedule a short phone chat and if the chemistry is there, add him or her to your date card and meet in person.

 

As always, I wish you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Julie

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and online dating and has been helping singles find love online and on their mobile phones for over 20 years. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.

 

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