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Bod Mobile App Helps You Ditch a Bad Date to Find a New One

Bod dating appThere are plenty of mobile dating apps these days, but have you ever dreaded going out on a date with someone new who you met online, wondering if you’d recognize them? Have you ever gone on a date and found the other person’s grammar or hygiene habits so repulsive you want to run out the door?

We know that not all dates are disastrous, but every once in a while you need to be saved from a date that’s gone south in a digital heartbeat.

Cyber-Dating Expert friend Jennifer Kelton from Bad Online Dates has come up with a solution to help yo find your Knight in white armor and to say goodbye to the dud IRL.

Jennifer told me that she created the bod App because she feels that “there is a problem in the dating space and more people are having bad dates than having good dates.”

Related: Why Grammar Matters in Dating

Sure we know that dating is a numbers game.

With the newly launched location-based bod app, you can open it up and see on a map another potential dater who might want to meet you and save the day. Jennifer calls it the Plan B to bad dates.

Jen feels that the dating industry has a responsibility to help singles make the best use of their time, money, and energy, (not to say the cost of the blow-out, new outfit, manicure, pedicure, flowers, etc.)

Here’s a Peek on How the bod Dating App Works

Bod Screen Shot

  1. Go to the App Store or Google Play (iPhone or Android), download, and log in through your email or Facebook account
  2. Set up your profile and turn on Date Mode to start looking for people around you to connect with in real time
  3. When Date Mode is on, users become discoverable and visible to other local app users, even those not currently on a bad date.
  4. Message matches to meet (and leave your date!)

Once a mutual interest is established, users receive a notification and now have an escape plan to get out of their date and start a new (and hopefully good) date.

Related: 20 Flirty Texts to Capture His Heart

Bod LogodHow is bod different from other apps?

Other mobile dating apps, like Happn, Tinder, and Bumble, are designed to help you meet someone and go on a first date. bod App changes the dating app game by helping you get out of that first Tinder date if it goes south and offers you the opportunity to salvage your night (and your outfit) and have a better time.

Icebreakers to get your started

If you’re on the shy side and can’t figure out a good opening line, the bod App has built in icebreakers that you can send to your matches. Basically they act as your own personal digital wingman and take you past “hey.”

Some examples of icebreakers include:

  1. Talking in public on your phone a do or a don’t?
  2. How often do you see live music?
  3. Do you like white or red wine?
  4. On a plane do you like the window or an aisle seat?
  5. Were you a boy scout or a girl scout?

Do download the app on iOs or Android visit boddatingapp.com

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.

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Happn Now Helps Users Meet Up With Matches Faster

Have you ever been talking to an online crush and found it difficult to take your flirtationship from digital to IRL?

If so, we have good news for you! One of our favorite apps, Happn may have just solved your problem.

Just announced, Happn has launched a new feature called “See You There” that allows “happeners” to share on the app what activities they’re up for doing within a four-hour window, ranging from catching a movie, grabbing a bite to eat, or even going for a run. The roll out gets released to members on May 17th and we’ve got the scoop.

Related: 6 Mobile Dating Apps to Use in 2016

How does it Work?

  1. Users who have previously crossed paths will see other users who are available to meet up and can take the opportunity to meet IRL, right here, right now.
  2. The new feature is easily accessed by tapping the (+) availability button on the bottom of the home screen, where users will be prompted to select an activity to display to other users in their timeline.
  3. “The new ‘See You There” feature is designed as a seamless integration to allow people to meet as they would on any given day – during regular daily activities – whether at a party, at work or the gym.

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In a press release, CEO Didier Rappaport said, “We created Happn as a way for people to meet others who are already in some way part of their lives. We’re constantly focused on enhancing the Happn experience for our users. We want happners to forge long-lasting, deep connections – the kind of relationships that begin by meeting each other in person, whether it’s for love or simply to find a new friend with shared interests.“

“As society evolves and becomes more mobile, the dating industry has transformed to focus on encounters, pushing dating apps to become more social in their offering. The new ‘See You There’ feature is designed as a seamless integration to allow people to meet as they would on any given day – during regular daily activities – whether at a party, at work or at the gym. After all, they already have a built-in shared interest: the paths they have crossed.”

Related: Happn Adds Voice Feature

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Related: From Beards to Vegans, There’s a Dating App for You

Happn reports they have more than 17 million users worldwide and they’ve been one of our favorites.

Have fun and as always, we wish you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s an Internationally known dating coach who has been helping singles find love online for over two decades with her Irresistible Dating Profiles programs. Need help with your Happn or mobile dating app? Find out how Swiping Right can help you find your dream date.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram and sign up for our Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

 

From Catfishing to Online Dating Tips – Julie Spira Speaks to Charles Tendell

Charles Tendell ShowAs a radio show guest on “Hacked” with Charles Tendell, we spoke about how to create an Irresistible Online Dating Profile as well as signs of a “Catfish.”

Listen here or read full transcript below.

Charles Tendell: We’ve got a pretty good show coming up, we’re going to be talking to online dating expert Julie Spira about how you can do dating online better.

CT: Are you dating online? Are you sure you’re doing it right? Are you having trouble finding Mr. or Mrs. Right online, or are you finding weird people and you’re not really sure if the person behind the keyboard is who they say they are? Coming up here in a few minutes will be Julie Spira from  CyberDatingExpert.com. Julie is an internationally best-selling author and the go-to person for online dating and mobile advice. She’s been seen in things like Glamour, ABC News, CBS, and Fox, and on and on. Even Wired, which is my favorite magazine, which  leads me to our question of the day brought to you by, are you dating online and what are you most afraid of with dating online? Julie, are you on the show?

JS: I am, it’s good to be here.

CT: Thank you! So Julie, how did you end up as the dating expert?

JS: That’s a great question. Really, what happened was I an early adopter of the internet and a technology executive, so I turned out to be a very early adopter of online dating. This means I started way back in the dial-up days, so my entry to online dating actually happened over 20 years ago. And once I mastered the art of how to create an irresistible online dating profile, I started coaching other singles how to maneuver their way from dial-up to digital, and now to the mobile, dating world.

CT: I’m curious – and I know my wife is probably listening to this, so this isn’t for my personal advice – but I’ve got a friend who needs some online dating advice. So how do you go about finding the irresistible profile?

JS: Well, first of all, I don’t know your friend, but everybody’s looking for something different. There are some people that come to me for coaching looking for a serious long term relationship or marriage and children, and there are other people that are getting out there for the very first time and they just want to go on a lot of dates. So there’s not really a one size fits all dating formula or a one size fits all dating site. It really depends on what someone’s, or your friend’s, dating goals are.

CT: And again, it IS one of my friends. My wife is probably listening, so I’m not trying to be an online dater myself. I did have some interesting experiences back in the day when I was dating online. Some of the scarier things that you run into out there. I didn’t have any success, I met my wife at a business luncheon and that was the best way to do that. Back in my day when I was dating, online dating just seemed kinda scary to me.

JS: Well, when I wrote the book, The Perils of Cyber Dating, a lot of people thought it was going to be this scary, scary story. Most of the stories were actually funny, there were some that certainly  were perilous where people did not represent themselves accurately, and we’re not talking about height and weight and age and things that people just tend to lie about online, but we’re talking about careers, martial status, and things of that sort.

CT: As an ethical hacker, I do see a lot of the online personas and people that wanna give the best version of themselves and sometimes it happens to be the version that only exists in their head.

JS: That’s true. And of course, we do hope for truth-in-advertising and it’s my goal to empower singles to be honest and tell the truth, because these days they’re going to check your Facebook page to see if you have friends in common and to see if your photos look recognizable, so that when you go on that date with that person, you’ll be sitting across from somebody that you recognize and there won’t be another frown on your face and a big disappointment.

CT: That’s what everybody’s hoping for. So let’s go back to your background. You started 20 years ago, you’ve got about 20 years in the online dating world. What’s been your craziest experience? What is it that you’ve learned over your years?

JS: Well first of all, I think you’ve really got to have a great sense of humor about it, and you need to go on every date thinking that you could possibly be making a new friend and even a business acquaintance, or if you’re lucky, maybe you could find someone you could fall in love with. So my recommendation is always to cast a very wide net and to laugh off the stories that are ridiculous. I have a story where a gentleman took me out to lunch and told me all about his colonoscopy from that week, including every inch of detail from the preparation and how many times he’d gone to the bathroom. There was nothing sexy or romantic about that lunch and, of course, there was never a second date.

CT: Wow, I’ve heard about people bringing a lot to the table and being honest and honest on the first date, but that sounds like a bad way to have a date.

(break)

CT: We’re talking to Julie Spira from CyberDatingExpert.com. Welcome back, Julie.

JS: Hi Charles.

CT: So we we’re talking about your scary moments and about this guy who was telling you about his colonoscopy at lunch.

JS: It’s something that was worth a laugh, but there were situations where I met a lot of really great people. People that I’m still friends with, people that I actually helped find their spouses, so it isn’t all perilous, but there was a married man who pretended to be single and was proposing marriage all across the country, just because it was good for his ego. And of course there was a wife involved and eventually he would disappear and show up in another city. I’m not saying this is the norm, I’m saying that if it does happen, please don’t let it jade you completely and dissuade you from giving online dating a chance because, at this point, we’ve got 20% of people who are in marriages or committed relationships, according to the most recent PEW internet research study, who have met their significant other or spouses online.

CT: As an ethical hacker, I’ve been in cybersecurity and computers for about 20 years now, and one thing people always ask me is how do you know who’s on the other side of the keyboard and should I be worried that that person is really presenting themselves in the best light?

Related: What’s the Buzz About Catfishing?

JS: Those are good questions and a lot of people are watching the TV show ‘Catfish’ and they’re so afraid they’re going to be ‘catfished’ by somebody. The point to dating online is to get to meet someone to see if you have enough in common to take the relationship from online to on the phone, and if you feel good on the phone, then set a date up on the calendar to meet in person. But if somebody is hesitant to meet you in person and they only want to be a digital pen pal and they keep promising you everything you can imagine, that they’ve never felt this way about anyone before and this is it and they love you, but they won’t meet with you, there’s usually a reason why. Never open your wallet to anyone asking for money, even if they say I love you in a text message, and if somebody’s from out of town, schedule a Skype or a FaceTime date. It’s time to actually go live and have that fun and flirty Skype or FaceTime date to make sure the person you’re talking to is exactly who they say they are.

CT: That’s perfect. Everybody assumes that when they go to their favorite online dating website and put up their profile and talk to these people that they go very quickly from being an electronic pen pal and emailing back and forth to “I’m in love with this person.” To me, that seems pretty risky.

Related: Video – Is  Your Date a Catfish?

JS: It is, but I see it happening a lot. It happens if somebody has just suffered from a heartbreak, break up of a relationship, the death or loss of a spouse, or a divorce, where people become more vulnerable. The need to love and be loved is so huge that if somebody mirrors everything that you say you’re looking for, you feel like “oh my, this person really gets me. They’re exactly what I’m looking for,” when, in fact, they’re just mirroring your profile. So, it’s great to feel flattered, but be very wary if somebody says “I love you” in a text message if they’ve never met you.

CT: That would terrify me, and I know I haven’t been in the online dating scene in a long time. I was – and I don’t even know how to say it, if involved is the right statement or not – involved, as a hacker, in the huge Ashley Madison breach. I don’t even know if you can call that online dating site, per se…

JS: It’s an adulterous website, so it’s a site for cheaters.

CT: Yeah, I don’t really think it falls into the same category, but there not the only ones. PlentyOfFish has been out there and I deal a lot in cyber breaches. I deal a lot in people’s personal data getting exposed and all of that other information, so what do you say to the people who might have been caught in one of those breaches? If their favorite dating site actually got hit and their personal profile or data got leaked onto the internet?

Related: Julie Spira on FOX (Ashley Madison Hack)

JS: Well first of all, as you know since you’re an expert in this, you know better than I do that the ordinary, everyday person can’t access that information. It’s very sophisticated data in the data dump. But the people from Ashley Madison, there were a lot of people whose names and emails were on that list and women went on and were putting their husband’s emails or their neighbors emails, and just because someone’s email is on the list doesn’t mean that they’ve actually used the site and that they’ve actually taken their clothes off. Tony Blair’s email was on the Ashley Madison hack and it’s likely that he was the one who entered it and they weren’t double opted in, which means  that just because they put in the email and maybe they were curious because of the advertisements doesn’t necessarily mean that they were communicating with anyone and actually went out with them and cheated on their spouse.

CT: That makes sense. It’s assumable that not everyone that was in the breach or had that kind of access were actually in that list. Now that makes sense. It would be funny to have people like Barack Obama on Ashley Madison, but it’s a good way of thinking that it might not actually be there. As far as the dating websites, what are some do’s and don’ts for a dating website?

JS: First of all I would say authenticity is everything, so please post recent photos. With my dating coaching clients, we go on photo shoots, and I always feel that women should wear red or maybe something bright pink because guys are scanning through all of these thumbnails and their biggest complaint to me is that everyone’s profile looks the same.  I’m a big fan of wearing red because red is the color of love, it’s the color of passion, it’s also the color of the stop sign and there have been research studies from the University of Rochester that shows men actually respond quickly and more often to women wearing red in their profiles. So ladies, dump and ditch that little black dress.

CT: My wife gets on me because I like to do all of my business logos in red on my business cards and everything else, and she says “You always go for red” and it’s because I respond to red.

Related: When in Doubt, Wear Red

JS: It’s a power color.  And guys, don’t wear a white t-shirt or black t-shirt. Guys look great in blue. I feel like what you’re wearing can really make you stand out whether you’re on a mobile dating app and people are swiping or whether you’re on a dating site. Now, the difference between the sites and the apps, most of the apps use your first name but the sites allow you to come up with a catchy screen name. So if you’re on Match.com or you’re on PlentyOfFish or OKCupid, come up with a fun and flirty screen name that looks unique, that makes you different from everyone else. Julie12345 is sorta boring, so my screen name was “pianobaby” because I play the piano and I have a baby grand. So people ask me questions. Why is your name pianobaby? Do you play in an orchestra? What’s your favorite song? If you happen to love tennis, or hiking, or skiing, make sure you put that somewhere in your profile title because it really allows you to start to engage with someone else.

CT: That’s a good conversation starter there. So you mentioned people use apps to swipe through and the pictures and women wearing the red dress, but I’ve always heard when you see someone who’s got a professional picture on one of these sits, you should be a little worried.

JS: If that’s the only picture, because a dating site is not the same as a LinkedIn profile. It’s a business look and it’s okay to have a business shot in your profile as long as you also have casual shots. You definitely must have a full length body shot whether you’re a man or a woman, and it really has nothing to do with what you weight, it’s more about what are you you’re hiding by not showing a full length body shot. So take an activity shot, as I mentioned before, skiing or something fun, or out in your garden or playing golf. If those are your passions, show your potential date what you’re doing on the weekends and what you could be doing with them, should you decide to go on a date together.

CT: That makes sense, it’s like a big billboard. You brought up LinkedIn, so LinkedIn is out there to get people attracted to your professional characteristics. Should people kinda sorta with a social twist to it, be taking a professional-ish approach to their dating profile?

JS: I think you do need to take a professional approach to it, as far as the approach. You need to be fun and flirty and casual within the body of your content and your photos, but if you don’t take online dating seriously then you might not be able to meet somebody really special who’s out there looking for you. With coaching clients, this is what I say. They say “It’s so much work, Julie. Do I really have to do all that work?” I say if you were out of work and out of a job and you went on three bad interviews and you didn’t get the job and it wasn’t a fit, would you stop looking for a job? No, you would keep looking until you got it right and you found the perfect match, and that’s how I feel about online dating. If you have that irresistible online dating profile, and you’re logging on at morning and you’re logging on at night, respond to people promptly like you would if somebody wanted to set up on a job interview for your dream job.  You need to make the effort and if it feels like a job, the results could be a lot greater than with your job that might last a year or two. You might find someone to spend the rest of your life with.

CT: That’s a different angle. A professional job interview, the worst case that’s going to happen is no, you didn’t get the job. Isn’t it, the worst case scenario, just look at Craigslist and all of these other places where people meet people and they go and put out all this energy and do all of these other wonderful things, meeting people online and this person could potentially be in your life for much longer than one conversation or one date, couldn’t they?

JS: That’s what we hope. I always say to people the squeaky wheel gets the digital love deal. And when you look at some of the mobile apps like Bumble, which is a new mobile app, they require once you’re matched the women to message within 24 hours or that match disappears forever. Now they’ve just added the feature where men don’t have an open-ended time to respond. They’ve got to respond to the woman’s message within 24 hours. What that does is it really forces you to take a look at the profile and see if you think there’s enough in common to start that conversation and meet offline.

CT: That also makes sense. That one sounds pretty cool. We’re about to go break, but the dating app where matches disappear sounds like a way to vet people who are on the up and up, but what about the ones who do respond?

JS: Well the responses really need to come from both parties and one of the complaints I hear is “I swiped right, wrote back, and never heard anything back” and that’s just because online dating and mobile dating are numbers games. There are 40-50 million people dating online, it IS a numbers game and you need to play to win. At the end of the day, don’t get discouraged if one out of ten people respond to you. You would rather have someone that has things in common with you to you can build a relationship with.

(break)

CT: Today we are talking to Julie Spira, the Cyber Dating Expert, and we’re getting into that area where everyone seems a little paranoid but everyone’s got an idea about how they should be doing online dating. Julie, before the break we were talking about different apps and different ways and people filling their profile and they should take a professional kind of approach to their profile. Is there an extent to the level of professional that should be there?

JS: Well it’s interesting because that PEW study I was telling you about says 22% of people actually hire someone to actually write their profiles for them because they don’t know how to describe themselves online. Here are some of my tips for people out there if you’re trying to do this on your own. If you’re working on a traditional online dating profile, keep the word count to about 100 to 125 words, avoid really lengthy profiles because no one’s going to read past the first couple sentences and there should be enough in there to keep them intrigued to read more. I also suggest asking a question in your profile. Talk about what your life would be like together in a positive, upbeat style and then ask a question such as “What about you?” or “Where’s your favorite travel destination?” “What’s on your bucket list?” because if somebody sees a question, they basically think “oh I must answer that question” and they give somebody an icebreaker on how to contact you when they really are at a loss for words.

Related: How Our Irresistible Profiles Help You Find Your Dream Date

CT: I just got a text message from a listener and the question is, should people spread their profiles around, like LinkedIn is just one place, but some people are on LinkedIn and Klout, but should people go on PlentyOfFish and all these other dating sites? Should they be on multiple ones?

JS: The answer is yes. The average person is on 2 to 3, and even 4 dating sites and apps. For traditional dating sites such as Match, PlentyOfFish, or OKCupid, make sure you download the mobile apps so you have the push notifications coming in case you do hear from that person you’re interested in, so you can put a date on the calendar. You never know which site you’re going to meet someone on, and if you see someone and you recognize them from another site, don’t call them out on it and say “hey I’ve seen you on two other sites” well, he knows it, you know it, she knows it. There’s no reason to bring it up. But you don’t know which site you’re actually going to enjoy using because the interfaces are so very different. So join multiple sites and eventually you’ll hone it down to one or two that you are the most comfortable with.

CT: So it’s all about your personal preference and results that you’re getting. I’ve got another question through text message, what is the kind of information that you should be sharing or asking in that first contact email?

JS: In the first email, remember, you’re just striking up a conversation to see if you would even like to get on the phone. If you have great phone chemistry, then schedule a date. So please don’t make it feel like it’s an interrogation, a deposition, or a job interview, because that’s how people feel. The phone will ring or a text will come in, “Where are you from and what do you do? What kind of car do you drive?” We may want to know what car you drive, but we’ll see it eventually when you show up at the restaurant and drive up in your car. So don’t ask questions related to where someone lives and what kind of money they make. We can figure out the lifestyle based upon the hobbies and activities that you do. Keep it light and friendly, and have a list of questions in case you get stumped.

My default place has always been, “who’s the most important relative in your life and why?”  “What’s the favorite travel spot you’ve ever been to and would you go back?” – similar questions like that to just keep it light and easy and breezy because the first date is like a pre-date. At the end of the first date, you have to decide if you want to put a second date on the calendar. And don’t wait, don’t play games – get out the calendar and schedule that second date.

CT: So what about personal information in that first message? Do you want to keep it surface level? I would assume you wouldn’t tell them the story of your life in the first message.

JS: No, nobody wants to hear about the drama. So make sure in the communication you’re not talking about the person who broke your heart or the person who stopped paying spousal support payments and how much it costs you to send your kids to college, because the person’s just going to think that you’re just looking for financial security. And whether you are or you’re not, you don’t want to put that out as your initial contact. I would keep it really light and ask “how was your day?” I would never say “how long have you been on this site?” and stop comparing bad date stories! People do that on first dates and they communicate on how bad the app is and how bad their dating stories are. Nobody wants to hear anything negative. If you have a funny story, you can share it, but the point is to get to know the other person and whether you’d actually like to go on a date with them.

CT: We’re talking to Julie Spira the Cyber Dating Expert. Now Julie, that first email where you say don’t share old stories or history or lead people to believe you’re just kind of looking for a paycheck,  and you don’t want to give out too much information, but as far as private information, address, phone number, things like that, when should someone give that out?

Related: Online Dating Safety Tips from an Expert

JS: Well it certainly shouldn’t be before a first date because you should always meet in a public place and subscribe to the buddy system. Have a friend that knows who you’re going on a date with, what their screen name is, whatever particular website or mobile app you met them on, and if you’ve been texting them you can even let them know their phone number, just for safety purposes. And meet them in a public place because if the date goes south for any reason, you certainly don’t want them showing up at work or your doorstep at home.

CT: Should you protect your personal information? Like, me being who I am and you being who you are, people can google us and find out information about us…

JS: And they do. Here’s the thing – everyone is going to google their date, some people are going to take it a step further and do a background search, but that’s typically after going on a couple of dates, not a first date. But they will check LinkedIn and Facebook to see if you have friends in common and they might ask some mutual friends – “Can you tell me your thoughts on Charles?” or “What do you think about Julie?” That’s just the way people are with dating these days because there’s so much information out there, we can’t help ourselves. My rule of thumb is, you can google and you can look, don’t get obsessed about it, but don’t bring it up on the date and say “Oh I googled you and saw that you were in a hot air balloon one day.” You don’t want someone to know that someone has googled 10 pages of entries about you.

CT: That’s scary. I can imagine sitting across the table from someone…

JS: You would feel like they’re a stalker. We want to feel safe when we’re on a date, and both men and women need to feel safe. People are more ultra-sensitive about the safety issue so it’s really up to the other person to help you feel safe. That means exposing exactly who they are and not prying too much information about your personal data. Nobody needs to know about why your marriage ended. Later on, if your relationship moves forward, of course you’re going to share things that didn’t work in your marriage if you want to have a happier marriage next time around.

CT: That’s all solid advice. I’ve seen horror stories on Craigslist and all these other places, and in my professional opinion, what most people come to me about is the “I met so and so online, we exchanged a bunch of information, and then they turned kind of crazy and they’ve got my Skype name, my email address, my phone number, what do I do?” So you’re saying after the second, maybe the third date is when you’d give them the additional information?

JS: You also want to protect your children if you’re a parent, you don’t want to exploit them in your dating profiles and it’s best to say something like “I’m a proud parent, I have two teenage kids aged 12 and 14” and leave it at that. This way they’ll know that you have a schedule that does include parenting.

CT: I’ve seen things where people have gone out and they’ve gotten a throwaway phone or they’ve gotten a google voice number or some other alternate form of communication they can control and turn off or on with this particular individual so they feel more secure, and to me, that’s always been a good way to go.

(break)

CT: Coming back, we’re talking to Julie Spira, the Cyber Dating Expert, about things you should do online to protect yourself and how to do online dating right.

JS: We want you to do it right, that’s absolutely true.

CT: I’ve gotten messages from all over the place of people asking different questions and it usually comes back to personal information. What is it that I’ve got? How can I protect myself and stay safe and still accomplish my goal of meeting Mr. or Mrs. Right?

JS: Safety is really huge. We talked earlier about meeting in a public place, letting a friend know where you’re going, who you’re going with, don’t accept late night calls or go back to someone’s house. I also recommend you talk through google voice. I always recommend having a google voice phone number just for dating, just for the early days. And your google voice phone number can be forwarded to your cell phone. This way, if somebody does bother you, you can easily block them. You can block people’s phone numbers anyway through your iphone or wireless carrier.

Also, come up with an email address just for dating that’s different from your work address so that no one ever has access to your dating account. You can get free email accounts with gmail, aol, and there are a lot of ways to get free email accounts. If somebody bothers you, or if you feel uncomfortable for any reason when you’re on a date, just walk out. You owe that person nothing. And if somebody is harassing you online, the dating sites take this very, very seriously. Report that profile and let them know that somebody is acting inappropriately, whether they’ve acted inappropriately sexually or asked for money, report those profiles to the dating site. They want to know.

CT: That’s interesting because in my world, people use anonymity  behind a lot of different things. So what they typically do on websites where it allows you to create a username, they create also a fake email, a google voice number, they put all of that stuff together, so even if you report it do these websites have a way to catch these people?

Julie Spira on TV with Online Dating Safety Advice

JS: They will block the profile. And if there’s anything that looks more serious, then obviously that will be bumped up to the proper security people with the dating sites. They have certain software in place that can address certain IP addresses for different countries that might look like it might be a scamming type of email. Again, if you’re on a dating site and somebody asks you to move offline to an email address and not communicate right away on the dating site, that’s a red flag as well. You should always  communicate on the dating website in a protected environment until you feel comfortable going offline and meeting that person.

CT: Wow. You said, before we went to the break, that you should let your friends know where you’re going and that you’re meeting up with this person and give them that profile information. What about if you have a friend at where you’re meeting this person? Should your friend be there? Maybe it’s a Friday night, they’re going out anyway. Should you have a friend there to keep an eye on you?

JS: Well, I believe in honesty. If you are scheduling a friend to be there or you know a friend will be there, I think you need to let your date know “by the way, I have a girlfriend that happened to make plans to be at the same place tonight, she may come over and say hello.” But if somebody feels that they’re being spied on, you’ll make them feel uncomfortable on the first date and you might not make it to the second date.

CT: Yeah, I see how that could be a little creepy and it’s one of those things where you wanna trust someone but you wanna verify, but it’s kinda six in one hand, half dozen in the other. You’ve got this person that you met, if you feel obligated to bring somebody else to meet them, isn’t that a red flag? Just say “yeah I’ve had a bad experience.”

JS: Some people like going on group dates and there are apps specifically for that, for double dating a Grouper. When Hilary Duff went on Tinder, her first Tinder date she brought a handful of her girlfriends. So some people like going on group dates, usually it’s the younger singles that like going on group dates, in their twenties. But say “by the way, I’m a very cautious dater. I can’t want to meet you, but I’d like to bring a couple friends and can we just hang out instead?” Then you run the risk of not really developing a relationship, but just hanging out. One of the questions a lot of people ask me is “Julie, I’m not really sure about my relationship status, am I dating this guy or are we hanging out?” You need to be clear about what your relationship goals are pretty early on. So if you feel comfortable bringing a posse of friends, you should tell the person about it before you show up on the date and see what kind of reaction they will get.

Related: Hilary Duff is Swiping Right on Tinder

CT: What about dating apps like Tinder? What’s your opinion on those?

JS: I think that any kind of dating app that allows you to meet more people more quickly and the opportunity to determine what you’re looking for is a good thing. The problem that we have with Tinder and a lot of the other dating apps is that there are a lot of people who are afraid it’s just a hookup app and that people are looking for casual relationships or casual sex. There will always be people looking for casual relationships or casual sex, and that goes back to the early days of Craigslist. And there will always be people looking for a serious relationship and wanting something more – a committed relationship or marriage. So I think you need to be very specific in your profile – if you’re looking for something casual or a hookup, say so. If you’re looking for something more serious, say “Swipe left if you’re looking to hook up.” But be very specific on what your dating goals are and don’t select someone based upon their photos only. Read those profiles. Because one day I saw someone who really liked someone’s profile by the photos and they swiped right and it turned out he was married, and right in the profile it said “polygamous relationship.” If someone had read that, they would not have swiped right unless that was something they were looking for. So read their bios, and let’s hope for truth in advertising.

CT: It looks like we’ve got a caller on the line – Lucas from North Carolina.

Lucas: Julie, I was wondering, when a woman is browsing through profiles and they all seem the same, are there any key words or phrases that pop out and catch a woman’s attention and say “oh wow this guy is different and unique?”

JS: First of all, you should always use key words of things you like to do and that you’re passionate about. A lot of women like to search for profiles of men who say they’re looking for long term or a committed relationship, or say that they’re financially stable.  Those are key words that women look for, but at the end of the day, she’s going to see your picture first and you need to look very happy and very approachable and put in things that really make you tick so it can really resonate with exactly what she’s looking for.

CT: Thanks for calling in. Julie, you brought up a good point, you do SEO for your websites and you do SEO for everything else, but you wanna actually load key words into your profile?

Related: This Strategy ups Your Tinder Game

JS: Yes, you do. And you don’t want to load them artificially into your profile because grammar and punctuation are really important. Women do not like to look at a little “i” with a dot when it’s supposed to be a capital I. You need to be very clean and clear and have great punctuation, but there are certain key words that will pop out. If a woman loves yoga and he really loves yoga, guys will go for a woman who has it in her catchy screen name or in her bio because they can visualize that she takes very good care of her body. And they like yoga as well, so maybe they could potentially go on a yoga date. If skiing is important to you, I have some clients that will only date other skiers. Put that in your profile because people may be searching for skiers within a certain distance from where they live and if you have that in there, you’re going to show up in a search.

Related: Why Grammar Matters in Dating

CT: We’ve covered what to put in your profile, what not to put in your profile, how to kind of protect your privacy online, use the buddy system – is there any kind of silver bullet? Say you have a bad date, what’s the most effective way, other than reporting this person, to end it? How do you get out of it? How do you tell that person on the other side “yeah this isn’t working out?”

JS: If you’re on a date with somebody and you don’t feel that there’s any chemistry please have good manners. I’ve seen too many people walk out on dates, spill wine in someone’s face that they didn’t look like their photos – they know they don’t look like their photos – cut the date short. Say “I really enjoyed meeting you, but I don’t think we have enough in common to take this any further and to get more serious, and I wish you the best of luck with your search.” Just be kind and pleasant about it because they might have a friend they can introduce you to. Why should you leave on a bad note?

CT: Well Julie, I appreciate it and I loved having you on the show. Any other tips?

JS: My best advice to you is to try online dating and even if you don’t have success right away, keep on dating. The more dates you go on, the better dater you become.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam .xo

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook

Sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter

5 Dating Apps That Aren’t Tinder

Dating Apps That Aren't TinderBurnt out on Tinder or maybe you’re just not feeling a spark ignite between you and your potential new flame?

At Cyber-Dating Expert, we’ve got a few Plan B’s to the rescue.

While Tinder is one of the hottest mobile dating apps out there and we recommend swiping right as part of your dating program, and while there are other popular apps like Happn, Bumble, and OKCupid that you might be familiar with, here are a few more dating apps to download right now.

Dating Apps That Aren't Tinder1. Dine

Dine wants to get you from a match to a dinner or drink date as soon as possible. You set up a standard dating app profile and then select three restaurants or bars (through Yelp integration) that you either love or would like to check out. Dine shows you 2 to 5 potential matches, and their restaurant preferences, and you can request to go on a date.

Features We Love: Dine auto-sorts your pictures based on which ones are proving to be the most popular. In the “First Date” section of your profile, you can offer to pay on the first date by selecting the “It’s my treat” option, or choose the  “Let’s meet with friends” option if you want to avoid any potential first date awkwardness.

Available on iOS

Dating Apps That Aren't Tinder2. Clover

This app claims to be a mix of Tinder, Match, OKCupid, Zoosk, and Plenty of Fish all rolled into one. Clover allows you to set up dates, view full screen photos, use photo filters, and organize potential interests. Using the Mixers feature, you can meet people with similar interests through topic-based group chat, which is like a mashup of Meetup and Reddit, according to POPSUGAR.

Features We Love: Clover allows you to look at your matches, people you’ve liked, and people who’ve liked you on three separate screens. There are also a wider range of profile settings like height, ethnicity, income, and religion. You can also state your intentions with the options of looking for people to chat with, looking for new friends, looking for a hookup, or looking for long-term.

Available on iOS

Dating Apps That Aren't Tinder3. The Grade

Step aside, Bumble, there’s a new female-friendly dating app in the digital dating world. The Grade aims to make women feel comfortable on mobile dating apps by holding users accountable for their behavior by using an algorithm that assigns letter grades to users. The goal of The Grade is #NoMoreCreeps and girls are able to swipe in a stress-free digital environment without having to worry about hostile messaging, inappropriate photos, or the worry of unrequited communication. Grades are based on profile quality, responsiveness, and peer-reviews generated from the opinions received by others.

Features We Love: Users with a grade of D or F are given a warning and instructions on how to improve their grade and users who maintain an F are expelled, which helps The Grade keep its community full of high-quality users who are both desirable and responsive.

Available on iOS and Android

Dating Apps That Aren't Tinder4. Align

If you’re an astrology fan, Align is perfect for you. Every day you’re given a new set of matches based on astrological compatibility and interests on your homepage, or constellation. Be sure to act quickly, as potential matches only stay in your constellation for 24 hours. User profiles display a different color scheme based on astrological sign: air signs (Gemini, Libra, and Aquarius) are yellow, earth signs (Taurus, Virgo, and Capricorn) are green, fire signs (Aries, Leo, and Sagittarius) are red, and water signs (Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces) are blue.

Features We Love: Matches show up in your Constellation and the larger the star, the more astrologically compatible you are. Align has a Traits section of curated sign-specific traits (including emojis) that you can add to your profile and build your bio.

Available on iOS. Currently only in Los Angeles, New York City, and the Bay Area.

Dating Apps That Aren't Tinder5. Fliqpic

Video chat in real time to figure out if you have chemistry with your digital crush on Fliqpic. The app’s main feature allows you to video chat before deciding to say “yes” or “no” to potential matches. The different categories on the app allow you to easily find users who have similar interests to you. It’s like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Skype all in one!

Features We Love: Users can search for common interests by category and by hashtag, which makes finding users who like the same things as you even easier. Fliqpic allows you to hide your online status so that you can go incognito on the app if you don’t feel up to video chatting with previous matches (almost like being “Invisible” on Skype).

Available on iOS and Android

Do you have a favorite mobile dating app to add? We’d love to hear your comments.

7 Must Do Dating Tips for Spring Fever

Spring Fever

It’s official! Spring starts this weekend and we are sure ready for the new season.

It’s springtime and we all know that spring fever is in the air and many singles are hoping to find love this season, or at least fill their date cards.

Now that you’ve moved the clocks forward to daylight savings time, it’s time to think about sunset dates, changing your wardrobe to lighter colors, and getting out to smell the digital roses.

Here are 6 Must-Do Online Dating Tips for Spring

1. Swipe Right

It’s time to turn up the volume and download a few mobile dating apps and start flirting. By now most of you have either used the hot mobile app Tinder, where you swipe to the right to connect with a potential date, or swipe to the left to send them into Internet heaven. It’s time to join the digital party. We can help you with our Swiping Right service to tweak your Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, Coffee Meets Bagel or other mobile dating apps.

Don’t forget the mobile versions of the dating sites you already belong to. If you’re a member of eHarmony, JDate, Match, OkCupid, PlentyOfFish, Zoosk, or other dating sites, make sure to keep the push notifications on so you can find a date in a digital minute.

2. Log on Twice Daily

Take one hour twice a day and log on to your favorite dating site or scroll through your mobile dating apps. Did you know that just having your profile appearing as online often will raise your visibility in a search to potential dates?  Ready, set, log on.

3. Turn on Chat

Whether you’re on Facebook or are on an Internet dating site or mobile dating app, make sure your settings are configured for you to be able to chat with someone IRL. Download Facebook Messenger on your mobile phone if you haven’t done so and start chatting with someone you might have a digital crush on. Every time you hear that chime on your phone or computer, it just might bring a smile to your face.

4. Cast a Wider Net (and Zip Code)

Not getting much activity in your inbox? Expand your search from 15 miles to 60 or even 200 miles. If you find the one, it’s worth the commute, or even relocating for love. Are you limiting yourself to searching for a narrow age range? Revise your search parameters by a few years. That’s right, 5 years lower and 5 years higher than what you’ve already been looking for might be a good idea. If you’ve upgraded to Tinder Plus, their new feature allows you to add a new location to search in, so if you’re planning on visiting friends or family in New York, you can add that location to start getting matched with singles in another city. By the time you arrive, your date card should be filled.

5. Reorder Your Photos

If you have 3-5 of your favorite photos on your profile and can’t find time to grab a new one from your Facebook page, change the primary photo so your profile looks fresh. When you get the time, add a few more recent shots, wearing something colorful and retire those photos that are 5 years old, or more!

READ: WHEN IN DOUBT, WEAR RED

6. View and Hotlist Profiles

Some people just don’t like writing emails or making the first contact. If you’re a bit shy about initiating contact, view profiles of those you might be interested in and check out your suggested matches.  Chances are they’ll see that you’ve viewed them and will contact you if they’re interested in you. Take it one step further and rate them with 5 stars or put them on your hotlist. Often they’ll be notified, will be flattered, and you just might put a date on your calendar.

 

7. Watch Your Grammar

A study conducted by online dating site and app Zoosk of 9000 online daters found that 72% of users were turned off by blatant spelling errors. Almost 1/4 thought poor grammar was lazy and 93% of singles would be happy to receive a text with proper punctuation. poorly worded messages or messages with typos and grammatical errors. Don’t be that lazy dater who doesn’t appear to be taking  your digital conversation seriously.

Related: National Grammar Day

The good news is Zoosk found that response rates for opening messages sent with an exclamation point are 10% higher than average!

If you still need some help to make your profile stand out from the rest, contact us about our Irresistible Profiles to help you find your dream date.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.

Julie Spira is a top online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She was an early adopter of online dating and has been helping singles find love on the Internet for 20 years. For more dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, join us for #DateChat on Thursdays at 5p/PT, 8p/ET, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter, and visit our Facebook page.

Photo credit: Fotolia.com

Why You’re Not Getting Lucky in Love Online

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Spring is around the corner. The clocks have been pushed ahead and many of you are calling and writing in with that achy pain and frustrated feeling.

You’re swiping, you’re smiling, you’re flirting, and you’re still single.

If you feel this way, know that you’re not alone. Just like you do a spring cleaning of your closets and homes, or your medical health checkup at the beginning of a season, it’s time for a digital checkup on the reasons why you’re not successful with online dating.

If you’re feeling unlucky on the day one believes in luck the most, this post is for you.

Roman philosopher Seneca said it best when he talked about luck. “Luck is a matter of preparation meeting opportunity. ”

Just how prepared are you? How much work are you willing to do to be happy and in love? Is it fate and are you waiting or will you take matters into your own digital hands?

Here’s an open letter to women to help open your heart to find love this spring.

Do any of these sound familiar?

  • I’m unhappy with the quality of matches.
  • I think all guys want to hook up.
  • Online dating and mobile dating feels like too much work.
  • No one responds to my emails.
  • Guys have too many options and are looking for the next great swipe.
  • All he wants to do is text.
  • I don’t want to be online for too long.
  • The same people are online that were online last year.

The list goes on.

These gripes and frustrations are coming from both men and women. You see, we’ve all been there. I can tell you that we are coaching more men these days than women and they are SERIOUS about finding love.

They pay for a dating coach, they put the expense and effort into getting new photos taken for the Internet dating profiles, they’re proactive and are writing to ten women a day. They put the same effort into online dating or are using their mobile dating apps to find a partner, with the same effort they do in getting that promotion at work. They know it can take a moment, a day, a week, or a year. They do the work and for the most, they don’t complain about it. There’s a gold ring at the end. It’s getting the girl.

This is what someone does when they pursue what they’re looking for. Seek and ye shall find.

Related: 7 Ways to Flirt on St. Patrick’s Day

As women, we are trained to wait for the man to find us. We don’t search that frequently and we don’t send ten emails to men every day or respond to that mutual match on a mobile dating app first.  That’s too much male energy for us. We think about the guy who couldn’t commit, about a potential date’s height, income, our ex who found a younger girlfriend, and the boyfriend who cheated. There’s so much negative thinking going on, that it’s impossible to attract someone great. Guys are guilty until proven innocent. I know this, because I talk to single men and women every day who are looking for love.

Related: Ladies, Make the First Move Online to Score 2.5 More Dates

These days, if you don’t have a mobile dating strategy, you’re pretty much not in the game. Not every swipe turns to a match. Not every match turns into a date. Not every date turns into your boyfriend. Not swiping means you just might be waiting…and waiting. Next season, you’ll be reading this post again waiting for summer to begin, wondering where all the great guys are.

So what are the guys complaining about?

  • Every girl’s profile looks the same.
  • Every girl wants a sugar daddy or someone to pay her bills.
  • Women have too many choices and they never write back.
  • We want to sleep with her eventually, but we need to have chemistry.
  • Women are looking for free meals.
  • Women complain about bad dates, exes, work, and money.
  • She’s a serial dater and not looking for something serious.
  • The same people are online that were online last year.

As a Digital Matchmaker and Online Dating Expert for over 20 years, I can tell you that both men and women have the same complaints. They want to connect, they just can’t find you. Or if they find you, you complain and don’t seem open and available.

I’m here to tell you that women are allowed to make the first move, while still remaining in their feminine energy. This is why both women and men enjoy the new Bumble app, where women make the first move. Women have more control over their love lives now, rather than waiting for their one in 50 million to find them. Men are flattered to hear from the women. Guys are frustrated when they keep swiping and writing, with no reply. Matches are being made. It’s what happens IRL that can help or hinder the process of getting to a second date and starting a relationship.

Related: Why Women Like Bumble

Here’s the thing, everyone’s dating online. No one calls to say they’re super-excited to be dating five guys a week for 52 weeks. They’re hoping their online dating tenure is shorter than longer.

A Pew Internet Research survey on online dating has shown that 30% of women actually enlist the help of someone to write their dating profile. These are the women who are taking it seriously. The same survey also showed that three times the amount of singles 18-24 are using mobile dating apps as compared to two years ago. It also showed that online dating use for adults 55-64 has doubled in the same time period. Everyone from your kids to grandma are dating online.

As you write down your long list of what you’re looking for and what you’re NOT looking for, I urge you to take any negative words or statements out of your vocabulary, out of your profile, and out of your first few dates. Everyone has a bad day here or there. If you’re walking train wreck, no one will want to date you or fall in love with you. Sure, they’ll sleep with you if you let them, but then you’ll complain that all guys want to hook up. As much as guys say they want a drama-free woman, there is no such thing as a drama free life. Our life lessons are what makes us unique.

Related: How to Write a Dating Profile That’s As Cool And Interesting as You

With spring around the corner, I urge you to leave the drama behind, leave the novel behind and go out and be happy. Enjoy meeting new people and learning about life outside of your world.

If your profile is filled with deal-breakers and you’re saying “don’t contact me if…,” I promise you, he won’t.

Life and love have a bit of luck involved, but it’s the effort that you put in that will determine the outcome of your fate. If you’re still stuck, you know where to find us.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert , Mobile Dating Expert, and Digital Matchmaker. She’s the CEO and founder of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years. Julie’s a frequent guest in the media with her online dating advice. Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook, and remember to sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt Newsletter.

From Beards to Vegans, There’s a Dating App for You

With millions of daters using mobile dating apps and thousands to pick from, how do you know which site is best for you?

7 On Your Side Screenshot copy

In a recent interview on 7 On Your Side: Can You Find Love Through an App on ABC TV’s KGO in San Francisco, we talked about a few dating apps to help you find love this year.

From Happn to Bristlr, Wingman to Salad Match, there are mobile apps outside of Tinder for you to swipe right and left on.

Watch the full interview on ABC 7.

In this interview, one Bay Area couple using Happn, while riding on the BART train, were notified they were in the same proximity. The couple connected and is a mobile dating success story.

If it wasn’t for the Happn app, they would  have never met, ever. Now the couple has been together for six months.

Happn is one of the thousands of dating apps in iOs and Google Play that help you find a match.

Dating author Julie Spira says some apps are off the charts. Sizzl connects only singles who love bacon and you can decide what pork type you’re really interested in.

“There’s this sort of mystique and magical feel about connecting to someone who has a similar lifestyle to you.”

Other apps mentioned include Twindog, which matches dogs and their owners, and  Wingman, which connects airline passengers who will be traveling on the same flight. Salad Match sets up salad lovers for a salad lunch. And then there’s Bristlr, where you can basically rub faces with someone who has a beard, if that’s your fancy.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years. Julie’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online.  For dating advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter and follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

Why Women Like Bumble – Julie Spira on ABC News

Julie Elex BumbleBumble, the mobile dating app which gives the women the control to make the first digital move has become a favorite for men and women alike.

In a recent interview on ABC 7 News in Los Angeles, I spoke with reporter Elex Michaelson about what I call the Sadie Hawkins of digital dating.

 

 

Watch the Video below by clicking the link.

Bumble App Puts Women First Should women make the first move in dating? Bumble is empowering them to do just that. Its a free, mobile app where women have to initiate conversation. More: http://abc7.com/technology/bumble-dating-app-puts-first-move-into-hands-of-women/1221330/

Posted by Elex Michaelson on Saturday, February 27, 2016

The best part of Bumble, is the women have 24 hours after a mutual match to initiate contact. After 24 hours, the match disappears, so this helps singles to stay engaged with the process if their goal is to change their relationship status.

The reason men like Bumble, is they’re less likely to get rejected if the woman contacts them. For my dating coaching clients, they like this feature, as they often get tired of swiping right on other mobile apps such as Tinder, without every getting a match or a conversation started.

ABC 7 interviewed single dater  Elana Feldman who said the men were 10 times more attractive on Bumble. Feldman is still looking for her match, so she says, she’ll keep swiping.

We featured Bumble in the Cyber-Dating Expert 6 Best Mobile Dating Apps for 2016, along with Tinder, Hinge, Happn, Coffee Meets Bagel, and Tastebuds, so look a look at the list and try a few mobile dating apps to see which one will be your favorite.

Happy Swiping.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years. Find out about Swiping Right programs for mobile dating and Irresistible Profiles programs for creating an online dating profile to capture his or her digital eye.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Tinder Update Ignites Gifs and New Flirting Features

Flirting on Tinder just got easier. Instead of just swiping right on the mobile app and starting a chat with a potential love interest, their latest update (4.8.1) includes, among other things, access to a GIF library from the popular GIF app, Giphy.

Now, when you can’t think of a way to start a conversation with one of your matches, or don’t want to just say “hey,” you can send a GIF instead.

GIPHY-1

The mobile dating app now offers a diverse selection of GIFs to choose from, and even gives you a search option to find the perfect GIF for your digital crush.

IMG_1058How to Access the GIF Library

  1. Click the GIF button located to the left of the text box (in the exact same spot as the photo insert button in iMessage)
  2. You’ll immediately be shown some of the most popular GIFs.
  3. Search for GIFs by category from pop culture, to music, to a TV show, or even a popular meme.
  4. Click on the GIF and it will instantly be sent. 
  5. You message folder will say, You sent a GIPHY to each match who was a recipient of a GIF.

Before you start sending fun GIFs to your matches, take a deep digital breath before pushing the send button. Once you click on a GIF, it sends instantly without an option to preview it or add a message. You can’t undo the GIF button like you can with their premium rewind feature to take back that last left swipe.

So if you’ve ever been hit with a “Netflix and chill” on Tinder and wanted to delete your match, now you can express exactly how you were feeling while you rolled your eyes holding onto your mobile phone.

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With Tinder’s new update, users can also “like” messages by tapping the heart icon next to the received messages.

Related: Tinder vs. IRL: #OnTinderAtTender Trend

The greatest part of the new Tinder update, is the ability to upload photos from your camera roll instead of being limited to those already on Facebook.

The previous limitations on uploading photos from your camera roll were an attempt to establish authenticity among users and limit the amount of fake or nonexistent people creating profiles on the app.

Another huge addition to the app is the support of 3D Touch and the ability to preview web pages within conversations. You can also use 3D Touch before opening the app too. Much like using 3D Touch on your Messages app to open a recent conversation, you can now use it on Tinder to go straight to a conversation with one of your matches.

What are your thoughts on Tinder’s new updates?

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and is the CEO of CyberDatingExpert.com. Julie and her team create Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more relationship advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt Newsletter.

View our book trailer for The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love OnlineNEWLY REVISED with a magical epilogue and Bonus Audio Dating Advice.

Tinder, eHarmony and Zoosk Win iDate Awards

eHarmony Zoosk iDate

Grant Langston and Kelly Steckelberg

Every year in January, the online dating industry gathers to talk about the latest trends in online dating and mobile dating.

Held in Miami Beach this year, Internet Dating Conference organizer Marc Lesnick curated a list of dating experts, matchmakers, online security experts, dating sites, and mobile dating apps for the 43rd Internet Dating Conference.

One of the highlights of the conference is the iDate Awards, which were held at the Deauville hotel in Miami Beach.

For the second year in a row, Tinder walked away with the “Best Mobile Dating App” of the year, while Zoosk won Best Dating Site of the year.  eHarmony scored with two iDate Awards, one for “Best Marketing Campaign” and another for “Most Innovative Company.”

Tinder iDate Award Julie Spira

Tinder Receives Best Mobile Dating App Award

Grant Langston from eHarmony accepted their two awards and Kelly Steckelberg, CEO of Zoosk accepted the award on behalf of Zoosk.

Other awards went to Happn, who was featured in our Mobile Apps to Use in 2016, for “Best Up & Coming Dating Site” and the “Best New Technology” award went to Dating Factory.

Some of the conference highlights included an opening Keynote from Steckelberg, where she informed the crowd that online dating is now a 2.2 billion dollar industry. “When the first dating sites came online, there were only 14% of adults on the Internet,” said Steckelberg. Today, 90% of adults are on the Internet. Most users are on multiple sites and dating apps, sometimes up to five at a time.

Mark Brooks, an industry consultant presented his 2015 Year in Review, which is always one of my favorite sessions. Brooks cited an eHarmony survey, where they found that meeting online lead to happier marriages. For those who met online, 45% met through Internet dating and 35% met through social networking and chat rooms.

Damona HoffmanTelevision was a big theme at this year’s conference, where producer’s of Carmelia Ray’s upcoming show, Mom vs. Matchmaker were highlighted in a panel. Another television panel included Damona Hoffman, who is a dating coach in Black Love on FYI, along with Devyn Simone, who is the co-host of Love at First Swipe on TLC. I held a session on Managing the Headlines: How to Get Press, filled with tips on how to respond to stories in the news about online and mobile dating.

There was a lively talk with Mark Brooks and Michael Egan, CEO of JDate to discuss Spark Networks.

All in all it was a love fest for those in attendance.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. For dating advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter and find out how Irresistible Profiles will help you find your dream date.

Now on Kindle and Audible, our 2nd edition of our bestselling book has been released for Valentine’s Day. Read or listen to the end to find out about our magical epilogue with a digital twist.

 

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