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Why Does He Text Another Woman

In this week’s Ask the Cyber-Dating Expert column, a female reader is uncomfortable with the text messages her boyfriend is sending and receiving from another woman. What would you do? Read our answer here.

Dear Julie,

My boyfriend of over a year texts a woman who lives in a different state constantly. She has feelings for him. I told him that it makes me feel uncomfortable. But he tells me that I’m insecure and that they work together.

Please help!

Rhonda

Dear Rhonda,

Thanks for your message and I’m so sorry to hear about this painful experience you’re going through with your boyfriend.

That would make any girl uncomfortable. If you’ve been together for over a year, I’m assuming you’re in a committed relationship.

Texting or chatting with a woman on social media when it makes you uncomfortable is a form of emotional cheating. He’s giving you reasons to feel insecure, even though she lives in another state. He may be getting a dopamine boost, or at least an ego boost every time he hears the chirp text message from her. 

If he said, “gee I’m sorry. I’ll stop doing that because I don’t want to hurt you,” I’d be happy to hear that.

RELATED: Gone Fishing, or Is it Over? 

Instead he wants to keep flirting with his digital girlfriend, who perhaps doesn’t even know you exist. I get it that it’s a great ego boost for him and it seems new and shiny to him, unattainable, and a bit of a fantasy relationship since she doesn’t live in town.

Here’s what I think you should do. Explain to him that you believe this texting is a form of emotional cheating and ask him why he feels the need to text her. Start sending him flirty texts so that need is fulfilled by you and perhaps he won’t feel the desire to text her. Then ask him to put the brakes on it and stop texting her out of respect for you. Ask him if he will let her know he’s involved with you and that he wants to focus his energies on your relationship.

Know that every man likes to look at women who are attractive and that’s normal. Creating this emotional bond over texts is crossing the line. He can’t have his girlfriend (you) and this girl on the side on his keyboard and lead her on. She probably doesn’t even know about you! Even if he isn’t interested in her romantically, if she made it clear she has feelings for him, this has potential to grow and could be harmful to your relationship.

RELATED: 20 Flirty Text Messages to Capture His Heart

Instead of demanding to see his phone to see the texts, just ask him if he will stop. If he won’t, ask him why this is important to him and find out what’s missing from your relationship so you can spice it up. Texts can lead to sexts and it’s damaging to a relationship. It can also become addictive.

Have a heart to heart talk with your guy before you call it quits, but if he won’t put your relationship at the top and stop these text exchanges with a woman who claims to have feelings for him, it may be time to call it quits.

We’re here to help you, so if you need dating coaching advice, check out our Irresistible Coaching programs.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam. xo

Julie

FOLLOW Online Dating Expert @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.

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Julie Spira on KTLA With New Mobile App Features

Many thanks to KTLA’s Rich DeMuro, who interviewed me for this fun segment on mobile dating on Tech Report.

We talked about new features on mobile dating apps to speed up your search to find a Valentine’s date. Watch this video to learn about the latest tips to better your odds on Match, Bumble, and Tinder apps.

Mobile dating apps are all the rage. There are new niche dating apps to help you find a Valentine.  Are you making the most of these popular and apps?

READ MORE: KTLA: Original Post: Matchmaking Apps Add New Features To Help You Find a Date Fast

MATCH – The world’s largest dating site has been rolling out new features for their members.

  • Top Spot – For $2.99, your profile will appear at the top of a search for 60 minutes. Match says you’ll get three times more views with this feature.  You’ll also appear the in top 6 search results when members are searching for someone like you. You can view the countdown of the time remaining during your Top Spot session.  They actually show you the photos of who has viewed you in your search. You’ll also receive an activity summary via email once your session has expired.
  • Missed Connections – This free mobile only feature helps you fill your date card faster after you’ve crossed paths with them. You’ll be matched with others who could have been in the same restaurant, supermarket, etc.  You’ll have to opt-in to use this feature on your mobile app when it appears. Match says this will be less creepy that the old Craig’s List “Missed Connections” (we hope so). It’s similar to Happn’s location-based app, which is solely based on matching you with people you’ve crossed paths with. The trend of meeting IRL is important to dating apps and sites, to avoid ghosting, breadcrumbing, or just endless chats.

READ MORE: Match Adds New Missed Connections Feature

BUMBLE – This bumble bee hive apps let’s women make the first move. I call it the “Sadie Hawkins” of digital dating. Users set their distance and age parameters and start viewing matches. A simple swipe to the right says you’re interested. A swipe to the left says you’re not. If both parties swipe right, you’ll appear in the match queue, where the woman needs to strike up a chat within 24 hours. Once the match gets notified, they have to reply in 24 hours to get the chat going. If you swipe left in error, don’t worry. You get three free “backtracks” a day,  where you shake your phone to see the photo you swiped left to.

READ MORE: KTLA: Original Post: Matchmaking Apps Add New Features To Help You Find a Date Fast

Bumble Boost, their paid service, has a variety of pricing levels of one, three, or six months, or one year. 

Bumble Boost has some fun premium features including:

  • Beeline: You’ll see people who’ve liked you when you open up the app, instead of waiting to swipe right through profiles.
  • Rematch: You can get matched again with someone you didn’t have time to start a convo with. Those profiles will have a grey circle around them.
  • Extended Rematches: If you’re a busy bee, you can have unlimited extensions on your match. But then again, if you have time to open the app and extend, why not just say hello?

READ MORE: Bumble Makes Men Reply or Match Disappears

BumbleVid is their newest feature.  You can post 10-second videos to your profile that will be deleted in 24 hours.  I call it dating in a snapchat world.

TINDER – Tinder is losing the perception of only being a hook up app.  Tinder reports that 80 % of their users are looking for something more meaningful. Plus they’re seeing 1.4 billion swipes a day!

  • Smart Photos: This new feature will select your best photo and make it your primary profile shot. So if that selfie in the mirror doesn’t cut it, it will be moved to a secondary photo. It’s great because your best face will appear in a search.

READ MORE: Tinder Love Story: Adriana and Dave

Tinder Plus: This premium service costs about $9.99/month.  You’ll get unlimited swipes, as compared to the free service. You’ll can also get back your last left swipe with their rewind feature, as often as you like.

  • Passport: Planning a trip and looking to fill your date card before you arrive? Passport allows you to add other locations to search for and to appear in a search. Remember, dating apps are location-based, so your searches will show where you’re hanging out now. Just add a new city in a search and it will be on your Passport in your settings.

At the end of the digital day, there are an enormous amount of mobile dating apps. The average person using dating apps has downloaded 3.5 apps.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam. xo

Need a little help with your dating life? Find out how our Irresistible Coaching will help you find your dream date.

FOLLOW @Julie Spira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook

SIGN UP for the FREE Cyber-Dating Expert Weekly Flirt newsletter

 

 

Mobile Love – Women are on a Swiping Frenzy on Dating Apps

Liftoff Mobile Dating Study
We know that men are swiping right and left on mobile apps in record numbers, but this study and infographic from Liftoff shows that it’s the women in North America who are more serious about finding a relationship on mobile apps than the men. The Liftoff team analyzed 20 of the top dating apps, with almost 3 billion dating app impressions, to see who was signing up for mobile apps across the world.

Women Are More Serious in Using Mobile Dating Apps

After analyzing the data, Liftoff says, “It’s clear that women are more serious mobile daters, while their male counterparts are far less committed–meaning marketers should aim cupid’s arrow at North American women.”

Does this mean men are swiping for hookups or convos only? This research calls women in North America “swipe happy,” and you thought men were swiping the most, right?

READ MORE: 12 Mobile Dating Apps for Different Relationship Goals

This study shows that compared to other popular app categories, dating apps have a much large user base with 91 million users worldwide, many of which open their mobile app over five times per day!

Summer is the Busiest Time for Mobile Dating Apps

Liftoff Mobile Dating

While many singles are in a swiping frenzy to find that last minute Valentine’s date, this research shows the busiest time for mobile dating apps is during the summer, when the heat rises online and IRL. Liftoff says registration rates for mobile dating apps peak in June and remain hot and heavy through September. Think summer romance? Probably so.

Other findings include that females register 100% more than men on Android and 107% than men on iOs.

READ MORE: 6 Mobile Dating Apps to Help You Find Love

What does this mean for singles looking for love on their mobile phones? It shows the level of intent for women, so guys, start getting serious, because the squeaky deal wins the mobile dating love lottery.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam.

FOLLOW Online Dating Expert @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.

SIGN UP for our FREE Weekly Flirt Newsletter

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles on finding love online with her Irresistible Profiles programs for over 20 years. Julie’s the recent winner of the 2017 iDate Awards for Best Dating Coach and is the author of the bestseller The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online and ranks as the most influential person in social media in “dating” and “online dating.”

Tinder Love Story – Adriana and Dave

Tinder Love Story - Adrianna and Dave

Meet Adriana and Dave who found love and marriage on Tinder. Find out how swiping right lead her into his arms and to the altar.

With Tinder now reporting that 80% of their members are looking for a serious or meaningful relationship, we’ll be featuring a series on couples who are happily in love, with the help of their mobile phones.

Here’s their Tinder Love Story, in Adriana’s words.

——————————————————————————————————————-

I have to admit, he was very good looking so instantly I wanted to see all of his photos. His photos weren’t of him “posing” though, they were of him being himself. There was a hilarious one of him being a goofball, one with his brother. No pictures with girls which was a huge bonus (*no girl needs the added drama of trying to figure out who the girl in the picture is ha hah). After “liking” his photos, I read his description, it read “I am a photographer and hairdresser and own hair salons. I like to have a good time and make-out”. Instantly I could infer that he had drive, was creative, and had found a hobby that filled him. And he liked to make-out – so I figured I had nothing to lose. 

RELATED: These Names Will Get You More Right Swipes on Tinder

It took about a month before we met in person. We started asking questions about each-other (where are you from, etc.) and the chemistry was instant. He was funny, we would respond with wit and humor, which made me that much more smitten and excited to meet. It took us a while to find a time that worked for both (which is why it took us a month!), but it was cool because when we would try to set-up a time, and we couldn’t because of x reason, we were really interested in what the other was doing, which made the conversations that much more dynamic.

I think there was so much great tension that built up from that cat-and-mouse chase that made it all that more exciting when we finally met. Since we had incredible energy in place, there was really no pressure when we met – which made it relaxed and quite possibly the best date of my life. We started with a movie, which actually was awesome because the silence, and how close we were sitting to each other, only heightened all the energy we had bottled up. Then we went for a drink at his favorite Indian place.

Then, a little buzzed, we went over to the most in-demand restaurant in SF, where we got what I swear was the sexiest table at the bar and ate and laughed until about 1, a.m. We ended at a dive-bar where we played pool, and finally, to end the night (and true to his profile description) we went back to his house to make-out. And yes, it was JUST to make-out – I had to leave him wanting more. 

RELATED: 12 Best  Mobile Dating Apps for Different Relationship Goals

The courtship definitely started right after our first date. I wish I could put it into words, but we both knew from that date that there was something special. The day after our first date, he helped me with a photography project. The day after that, we met up for lunch – and stayed together until dinner. The day after that, coffee – and before we knew it, we were inseparable.

From day one we were pretty much exclusive. I didn’t see anyone else after I met him, because I didn’t have to. I wasn’t missing out on anything. I felt that no one could possibly have what David had. He was handsome, funny, cultured, had so much confidence in himself but was somehow, at the same time, humble and equal to everyone around him. It has been the easiest relationship either of us has ever been in, and we say it all the time. We always wanted to hang-out with one-another, and every time we did (and still do) it was always (and still is) a good time.

If our personalities clash, they clash for two minutes, because after that, we forgive, forget about it, and we go on with our day. That’s how I knew he was the one – it was on a random night. We were in bed, just watching a movie and he had fallen asleep. Our legs were intertwined and we had just said our good nights and how much we loved each other. It wasn’t anything different to how we went to bed any other night – but that’s how I knew. I knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life going to bed saying I love you to him. And waking up by his kisses and hearing him say “my beautiful girl”. It’s our little, mundane routines that made me want to have a life with him. No matter what happens in the day, we always go to bed intertwined, and to me, that’s a pretty great life to have. Something I knew I wanted to keep.

RELATED: Why You Won’t Delete Tinder When You Meet The One

We’ve been together for almost 4 years and got married last April, so this year we’ll be celebrating our 1-year anniversary. Marriage has been incredible, and it’s so surreal but the most incredible feeling to look-up and see him doing whatever in the kitchen or living room, and knowing that he’s my husband. We love to travel, and have been doing tons of it, and before kids, that’s what we want to keep on doing. Family is huge for us, so kids are slowly but surely creeping into the picture, but for now, we want to be married. We want to enjoy each other, support growth in our careers, and develop something really strong so that when kids come along, we’re solid.

Congratulations to Adriana and Dave, who prove you can swipe right for love.

Photo credit: Samm Blake

Have you met someone special on Tinder or other mobile dating apps? We’d like to hear from you.  CONTACT US to share your story.

Follow Online Dating Expert @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram

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7 Tips to Get Lucky in Love by Valentine’s

7 Ways to Find a Date for Valentine'sValentine’s is about one week away. Some singles are stressing big time about how to find a date for the most romantic day of the year. Others could care less and will hang out with friends or hide under the sheets alone.

If finding a date for Valentine’s is on your list, I have great news for you. With a little effort and the help of your mobile phone, you can get lucky and find a date by Valentine’s Day.

7 tips for singles to get lucky in love this Valentine’s Day

1. RSVP to all events and parties

Whether it’s a business mixer or speed dating event, go out, dress up, and wear that smile of yours. Check out some events on MeetUp or any singles events and don’t be shy.

2. Update your online dating profile

If your primary shot was from three years ago, it’s outdated. It’s time for a digital facelift to show off the new you. Post photos of a recent trip and caption them if you can. Find a favorite photo or two on Facebook or Instagram. If you got a new puppy add it to your profile, but don’t use it as a primary shot. Mobile dating app Tinder actually reorders your photos showing the best one first.

3. Download 3 mobile dating apps

Research shows that singles are using on average 3 mobile dating apps. They’re so easy to use and you can find a date in minutes, not days. A Pew research survey showed that the number of millennials using dating sites and apps has tripled in the last few years!

4. Be proactive and Upgrade During Peak Times

The squeaky wheel gets the digital love deal. If you’re online, write to 5-10 people a day. Think of it like sending out 5-10 resumes a day if you’re looking for a job, only this is better. You could find the love of your life. Respond quickly and turn on those push notifications to find out when someone hot sends you a message!

Also, you can appear more frequently on sites and apps for just a few dollars.Did you know that OkCupid lets you know when it’s Rush Hour? Match has a Top Spot and Tinder has a Boost? All of them boost your profile to the top of the list in a search, where you can be viewed more than 10 times than normal. Yes, for less than the price of one cup of coffee, it’s worth a shot.

5. Check out your single friends on Facebook 

Have a digital crush? Check out his or her relationship status and if it it says “single,” go ahead and start flirting on Facebook chat. Plenty of couples have found love on the world’s largest social network, as can be seen on FacebookLoveStories.com.

6. Go to a restaurant or coffee shop with WIFI

Working from home? Why be alone when you can be out in public with your computer instead. Make sure to dress up and take walks to the restroom or pass by as many people as possible with a smile on your face. It will become your new office to work and flirt. Stop, stare, and smile.

7. Text an ex 

As a last resort, know that 20% of singles do text their former love on Valentine’s if they’re flying solo. Send a quick Happy Valentine’s message with an emoticon to your former flame. If you decide to do so, do it in the morning, not at night, as he or she might be on a Valentine’s date, or they might look at you as a late night booty call.

Remember, although Valentine’s Day is a big day for couples, the day after, February 15th, is Singles Awareness Day. Either way, love yourself first and love will come your way.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam. xo

Looking for help with dating? Find out how our Irresistible Profiles will help you find your dream date.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s been named the Best Dating Coach of the Year in the 2017 iDate Awards and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. For more dating advice, FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and facebook. SIGN up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.

 
Photo credit: Fotolia

12 Best Mobile Apps For 8 Different Dating Goals

Irish IndependendWe know that everyone is looking for something different when it comes to matters of the heart.

With that in mind, there is no one-size-fits-all formula or perfect dating site for everyone and the average mobile dating app user is active on 3.5 mobile dating apps!

When reporter Chrissie Russell interviewed me as the dating expert for a special Valentine’s issue of the Irish Independent’s weekend magazine, I provided a list on how people can find the right dating website or app for them. The feature is called “Finding the Most Appealing Dating Technology.”

If you can’t pick up a copy of the magazine, here are some highlights that were featured.

Dating Apps for Different Relationship Goals

1. The Young Professional: Match is a great choice because of the large amount of members worldwide. You can search by his or her profession and list your profession in your profile choices. Hinge is a dating app geared towards young professionals and recently they eliminated the swiping feature to differentiate them from Tinder. Now they’re calling themselves, the relationship app.

READ MORE: Match Adds Misconnections Feature

2. Someone a Bit Cynical About Online Dating and Apps: If you’re cynical, have some fun with some niche dating apps such as Bristlr for women who fancy men with facial hair, Align to match you based on astrology, or Gluten Free Singles for the gluten-fee intolerant.

3. Someone Just Looking for Fun: Tinder started out with most of the users swiping right to hook up. Now they say 80% of their members are looking for a meaningful relationship. Read the mini bios on the profiles to see if you should swipe right or left to find someone fun to hang out with.

READ MORE: These Names Will Get You More Right Swipes on Tinder

4. Someone Who Wants Companionship: Many sites and apps will help you find friends. The Bumble app has a BFF feature, where you can switch from looking for a relationship, to looking for a friend to hang out with for a non-dating experience. They call it switching to the friend zone.  OkCupid also gives you a choice of searching for New Friends, Casual-Dating, Long-Term Dating, or Casual Sex. Happn is a great app, because it matches you based on who you’ve crossed paths with, as they are a geo-location app.

5. Someone Divorced or Widowed and a Bit Apprehensive of Online Dating: If you’re starting over and don’t want to be bombarded with cubs looking for cougars and might want to meet someone more serious, eHarmony, a name that’s been around since 2000 would be the way to go. They allow you to take your time in communicating with potential dates.

READ MORE: Bumble App Now Helps You Find Your BFF

6. Someone Sporty Who Wants to Avoid the Bar Scene: Avoiding the bar scene is high on a lot of singles’ lists. Any site or app that has a chat feature would be good to have a virtual drink date. You can both grab a glass of bubbly or your favorite spirit and chat. If you’re a workout fanatic,, try the new Sweatt app for fitness enthusiasts.

7. Gay or Bi-Curious: Grindr was the original app for gay men, but these days many sites allow you to search based on your sexual preferences. Check out OkCupid, where in the drop down menu of your profile you can state if you’re Straight, Gay, or Bi-sexual. Click the more button and you’ll find a wider selection including Asexual, Demisexual, Heteroflexible, Homosexual, Lesbian, Pansexual, Queer, Questioning, and Sapiosexual. That’s a pretty full menu. Tinder just added a new gender feature, which includes transgender relationships.

8. Someone Not Very Good with Technology: For those technically challenged, they won’t be happy with any site. I suggest they enlist the help of a dating coach with experience in this area. A recent PEW research study showed that 30% of women had someone write their profiles. If you really can’t stomach logging on and swiping right, find a professional who can do this. As one who’s been been coaching singles for over 20 years, I do the work for many busy CEOs, or technically challenged singles, to be their digital wing woman. It solves the goal of meeting someone, while not having to be attached to the push notifications on your cell phones.

READ MORE: Find out How Irresistible Profiles Will Help You Find Your Dream Date

About Julie:

Julie Spira is the world’s top online and mobile dating expert. As an early adopter of the Internet, Julie has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and ranks as the most influential person in social media in the categories of “dating” and “online dating.” Julie’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online and is the go-to person in the media, having appeared in over 1000 stories on the intersection of dating and technology. She was the winner of the 2017 iDate Awards for Best Dating Coach.  She’s also listed as one of the top 10 columnists to follow on Twitter.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

Match Adds New ‘Missed Connections’ Feature

Now you can mind more ways of meeting people around you on your mobile app.

As announced on the Match blog, their new location-based feature, “Missed Connections” will help the 55% of singles that feel technology has made it more difficult to connect with others in real life. Match wants to reverse this trend by harnessing technology to do what people want to do naturally—meet in real life.

Match, who won the Best Dating Site of the Year at the iDate awards, just announced their new feature, with the intent of beineg less creepy that the old Craig’s List “Missed Connections, and similar to Happn’s app, which is solely based on matching you with people you’ve crossed paths with.

This new feature on Match will help you fill your date card with singles, AFTER you’ve crossed paths at the same place.

The trend of meeting IRL is important to dating apps and sites, to avoid ghosting, breadcrumbing, or just chatting without meeting IRL.

RELATED: Happn Now Helps Users Meet Up With Match’s Faster

Match Missed Connections

How Missed Connections Works

  1. Match members will see a Missed Connections introduction page in the app, showing off the feature and asking you to opt-in.
  2. Once you’ve opted in, you’ll be able to browse through your recent feed of members you’ve crossed paths with, based on your current matching criteria and your location.
  3. The feature now makes geolocation THE priority in your search criteria, revealing the intersection points for your last crossed spot, within one block (such as Prince and Broadway) and the number of times a person has crossed paths with you.
  4. Missed Connections now makes it easy to start up a conversation, right within the feed, providing a natural alibi to connect with someone else.

Match’s CEO Mandy Ginsberg tells Mashable,

“While we all love to know as much as we can about potential mates, this isn’t just about giving you more information. The whole point is starting these relationships out in the real world.” 

RELATED: 5 Love Experts Predict Dating Apps for 2017, Because It’s Time to Get Offline Faster

Missed Connections helps you meet the person who hangs out at the same coffee shop or dog park; someone with similar interests.

With the trend of meeting IRL and taking the relationships offline in 2017, we have high hopes for this feature, but remember, just because you like the same place, doesn’t remove the safety element you should always adhere to when meeting someone from offline, online.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s the recipient of the Best Dating Coach of 2017 and has been coaching singles with her Irresistible Dating Profiles programs for over two decades.

For dating advice, FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram, LIKE us on Facebook, and sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Valentine’s Day Countdown – How to Land a Date

Valentine's Day - CyberDatingExpert.comTime is flying and it’s about 1 month until Valentine’s Day, the most romantic day for many, and a time others can’t stomach. It’s also a long weekend for many right now, so it’s time to come up with a dating strategy, both online and offline.Whether you love or hate Valentine’s Day, our annual  Valentine’s Survival Guide is here to help you leading into February 14th.

If you’re single, there’s no need to hide under the covers. If you’re dating someone, but he hasn’t asked you to be his or her Valentine just yet, here are some tips to enjoy the day, regardless of your relationship status.

Remember, Valentine’s is on a Tuesday this year, so if you aren’t celebrating on the 14th, you have an opportunity to book a romantic weekend away, while having a quiet Valentine’s Day snuggled up in the arms of your sweetheart. 

1. Ramp up Your Online  Search

Let’s face it, everyone seems to be online theses days, so if you’re not logging on twice EVERY day, checking your matches and responding quickly to his or her emails, some other girl or guy just might get their attention faster. I always say the squeaky wheel gets the digital love deal. If you can carve out time to go to the gym, you should be able to schedule time to log on daily. Make sure you’ve signed up for push and email notifications of when someone has emailed you, liked you, flirted with your or made yo their favorite. Check out their profile and thank them for the compliment.  Ditch the old waiting game rules. This is how the digital dating world words.

2. Download New Mobile Dating Apps 

If you’re not on Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, Happn, or are using the mobile dating apps from your favorite online dating site, make more of an effort to download these apps now! January is the busiest month for NEW online and mobile dating log ons. The numbers are HUGE, so we want you to jump right in to meet someone special. 

3. Start Swiping Right

Being proactive on mobile dating apps is the only way to fill your date card. Open your apps and swipe right to your matches if they are at least 50% of what you’re looking for. Now is not the time to be swiping left.  It’s really a numbers game. Unless your match is advertising for a hookup or looks like an a total freak, then swipe right and take a moment to say hello. A guy will be flattered to see the notification that you’re digging him digitally. Remember to take your relationship from online to offline so you can meet IRL. This means a few chats back-and-forth and then a MANDATORY phone date. Keep the date to 20 minutes with the goal of getting a second date on the calendar.

4. Attend Singles Events

The one thing about singles events is, everyone is in the same boat. They’re single and are hoping to connect with someone. Check out Match.com’s Stir events in your city with happy hours and fun games, RSVP to a MeetUp for a subject you’re passionate about, and attend business networking events that seem to ramp up the after the first of the year. The more you’re out there in the public, the more opportunities you have to flirt with a potential date. Remember not to be too coy. Be bold and smile.

Dr. Pat Allen, my mentor and author of”Getting to ‘I Do’,” suggests the five-second stare. It may feel like an eternity, but it may bring you closer to that cute guy across the room. P.S. Remember to wear red! It’s the color of love and romance and is backed up by tons of research studies to be known to attract men.

Related: Read Valentine’s Survival Guide

5. Text an Ex

Did you know that 20% of singles do text an ex on or around Valentine’s Day? So if both of you are single, why not get together and go down memory lane. Just make sure you’re BOTH on the same page and just enjoy the evening. You may not be rekindling that old romance, but the familiarity might just make it a fun evening rather than flying solo. Or, you might rekindle the romance and realize that the other people you dated while apart just didn’t match up to your ex.

Read: Holiday Dating: 5 Tips on Getting Back with an Ex

6. Lighten up on the Pressure and do Something Fun

From going to an amusement park to ride the Ferris Wheel to taking a cooking class or going ice skating, make Valentine’s Day a no-pressure experience if you’re in a new relationship and aren’t exclusive yet. There’s no need to break the bank.

Being single on Valentine’s isn’t the end of the world. Sure you go into stores and see nothing but boxes of red candy and roses throughout the grocery stores, but a new survey from U.K. online dating site Smooch.com shows that only 10% of the 2000 singles polled actually love Valentine’s Day. Are the other 90% pretending to go along with the program?

Grab your BFF’s, dress in pink or red, and head to the movies or a concert together. Valentine’s Day isn’t always about love. It’s about spending quality time with someone you really like.

Whatever you do, DON’T GHOST your date leading up to Valentine’s Day. It’s just uncool, period.

Read: 10 Fun Valentine’s Date Ideas

Are you a fan or foe of Valentine’s Day?

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Mobile Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of online dating and creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert, on Instagram and Twitter, and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

#DatingSunday – Jan. 8th is the Busiest Day for Online Dating

Dating Sunday
The world’s largest digital love fest is about to happen. Make sure your iphones, computers, and tablets are fully charged, as the biggest surge for online dating sites is around the corner.

Get ready to swipe on your SmartPhones because Dating Sunday, the busiest day for most dating sites and newly singles will be on Sunday, January 8th. This is where millions of singles will be swiping and logging in for love all around the same time.

Traditionally, around the first of the year, many New Year’s resolutions include finding love or at least trying to meet someone to hang out with.  For this reason, or the fact that many singles had a lackluster holiday, the number of people be joining online dating sites and mobile dating apps hits record numbers in January.

In fact, our friends at Match have an EXACT time on Dating Sunday that their usage will peak, BIG TIME. The world’s largest dating site expects 8:49pm/eastern time to be the busiest minute of the entire year.

Are you ready for the world’s largest digital dating party?

Match tells us that they expect to see a 42% spike in new singles coming to the site to meet someone on #DatingSunday.  During their peak dating season (Christmas to Valentine’s Day), they estimate that more than 50 million messages will be sent, 5 million new photos will be uploaded, and one million dates will take place.

Related: How to Take Down Your Match Profile When You Meet The One

Our friends at Tinder concur that Dating Sunday, the second Sunday in January, will show a 12% spike in users and downloads. Already on Sunday, January 1st, Tinder saw one of the biggest days of usage ever, so singles will be swiping in record numbers on their mobile dating app.  Plus, Tinder says that 80% of their users are now looking for a meaningful relationship. Say goodbye to hookups and hello to love, for many.

Related: These Names Will Get You More Right Swipes on Tinder

Over at PlentyofFish, singles are looking for their perfect catch. POF reports that they received over 18 million first time signups during 2016 and expect approximately 103,910 in new signups on Dating Sunday.  That’s about a 48% increase above their average daily rate from 2016. Plus, they expect 2.5 million sign ups in January alone.

Remember, Sunday nights are always peak times for online dating activity, so take advantage of the surge in active members online and swipe right and reply to those emails and meet IRL.

Related: PlentyofFish Says These 1st Messages Lead to Marriage

At Cyber-Dating Expert, our phone has been ringing and the text messages have been flying. We know that it’s peak season now through Valentine’s Day, so grab your smartphone and download the latest mobile dating apps and get ready to fill your date card!

Yes indeed, everyone will be looking for love in 2017.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam. xo

Need a little hand holding? Find out how our Irresistible Profiles dating coaching programs can help you find your dream date.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert, and as an early adopter of online dating, has been coaching singles for over 20 years on how to find love on the Internet. Julie’s been named a Finalist for the 2017 iDate Awards for Best Dating Coach of the Year.

Let’s Get Social!

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook and sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.

 

These Names Will Get you More Right Swipes on Tinder

Is your first name holding you back from getting matches and swipes on Tinder?

The mobile dating app just released their Top 10 list of the most popular female and male names that are getting the most right swipes in the United States.

Tinder Female Names

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

For those named Hannah, Emma, Lauren, Julia, Emily, Rachel, Samantha, Katie, Anna, or Sarah, congratulations! You’ve made the 2016 top swiped list of female names on Tinder.

You should have more matches than most, and I challenge you to start chatting, filling your dating card, and meeting IRL.

Related: Tinder Tales on the Tomorrow Show

For the guys, if you’re lucky enough to be named Lucas, Ryan, Matthew, Nick, Josh, Brandon, Justin, Ben, Adam, and Andrew, the ladies will be swiping right on your profile more than most.

Tinder Male Names

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Does this mean you need to change your name? That would sure be confusing if your name is Larry and your profile says “Lucas” to try to attract more swipes.

Related: This Tinder Feature Will Help You Stand Out

I believe in authenticity, so don’t confuse yourself or your potential date, but if your name is on the list, log on and swipe more often to see if your match numbers increase.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam .xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of the Internet and is the creator of Mobile Dating BootCamp. As a celebrity dating coach, Julie creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene.

For dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook. Sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter delivered to your inbox.

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