QUOTE OF THE DAY

“The art of love is largely the art of persistence.” ~Albert Ellis

I’ve always said, “The squeaky wheel gets the digital love deal.” There’s so much truth to that with online dating or mobile dating apps. There’s a fine line between being needy and sending too many emails, to checking in again with someone who didn’t respond a week or two later.

You see, women get bombarded with emails and messages from guys. Guys know that, so they send a large quantity of messages or swipe right on just about everyone since it’s a numbers game.

The way it works, is to be proactive with your love life. Don’t sit around and wait for Mr. or Ms. Right to appear and sweep you off your feet. Give someone a chance if they make the effort to try to get your attention. Even if there’s no chemistry with them, you might make a new friend or perhaps can introduce hi or her to someone you know who would be a better fit.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Follow @Julie Spira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.

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Burnt out on Tinder or maybe you’re just not feeling a spark ignite between you and your potential new flame?

At Cyber-Dating Expert, we’ve got a few Plan B’s to the rescue.

While Tinder is one of the hottest mobile dating apps out there and we recommend swiping right as part of your dating program, and while there are other popular apps like Happn, Bumble, and OKCupid that you might be familiar with, here are a few more dating apps to download right now.

1. Dine

Dine wants to get you from a match to a dinner or drink date as soon as possible. You set up a standard dating app profile and then select three restaurants or bars (through Yelp integration) that you either love or would like to check out. Dine shows you 2 to 5 potential matches, and their restaurant preferences, and you can request to go on a date.

Features We Love: Dine auto-sorts your pictures based on which ones are proving to be the most popular. In the “First Date” section of your profile, you can offer to pay on the first date by selecting the “It’s my treat” option, or choose the  “Let’s meet with friends” option if you want to avoid any potential first date awkwardness.

Available on iOS

2. Clover

This app claims to be a mix of Tinder, Match, OKCupid, Zoosk, and Plenty of Fish all rolled into one. Clover allows you to set up dates, view full screen photos, use photo filters, and organize potential interests. Using the Mixers feature, you can meet people with similar interests through topic-based group chat, which is like a mashup of Meetup and Reddit, according to POPSUGAR.

Features We Love: Clover allows you to look at your matches, people you’ve liked, and people who’ve liked you on three separate screens. There are also a wider range of profile settings like height, ethnicity, income, and religion. You can also state your intentions with the options of looking for people to chat with, looking for new friends, looking for a hookup, or looking for long-term.

Available on iOS

3. The Grade

Step aside, Bumble, there’s a new female-friendly dating app in the digital dating world. The Grade aims to make women feel comfortable on mobile dating apps by holding users accountable for their behavior by using an algorithm that assigns letter grades to users. The goal of The Grade is #NoMoreCreeps and girls are able to swipe in a stress-free digital environment without having to worry about hostile messaging, inappropriate photos, or the worry of unrequited communication. Grades are based on profile quality, responsiveness, and peer-reviews generated from the opinions received by others.

Features We Love: Users with a grade of D or F are given a warning and instructions on how to improve their grade and users who maintain an F are expelled, which helps The Grade keep its community full of high-quality users who are both desirable and responsive.

Available on iOS and Android

4. Align

If you’re an astrology fan, Align is perfect for you. Every day you’re given a new set of matches based on astrological compatibility and interests on your homepage, or constellation. Be sure to act quickly, as potential matches only stay in your constellation for 24 hours. User profiles display a different color scheme based on astrological sign: air signs (Gemini, Libra, and Aquarius) are yellow, earth signs (Taurus, Virgo, and Capricorn) are green, fire signs (Aries, Leo, and Sagittarius) are red, and water signs (Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces) are blue.

Features We Love: Matches show up in your Constellation and the larger the star, the more astrologically compatible you are. Align has a Traits section of curated sign-specific traits (including emojis) that you can add to your profile and build your bio.

Available on iOS. Currently only in Los Angeles, New York City, and the Bay Area.

5. Fliqpic

Video chat in real time to figure out if you have chemistry with your digital crush on Fliqpic. The app’s main feature allows you to video chat before deciding to say “yes” or “no” to potential matches. The different categories on the app allow you to easily find users who have similar interests to you. It’s like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and Skype all in one!

Features We Love: Users can search for common interests by category and by hashtag, which makes finding users who like the same things as you even easier. Fliqpic allows you to hide your online status so that you can go incognito on the app if you don’t feel up to video chatting with previous matches (almost like being “Invisible” on Skype).

Available on iOS and Android

Do you have a favorite mobile dating app to add? We’d love to hear your comments.

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• Learn how Irresistible Dating Coaching can help you find your dream date.

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Laughter is known as the best medicine, both online and offline.

When it comes to matters of the digital heart, endless dating profiles often include “must have a sense of humor” listed as a requirement for a potential date. Sure you want to fall in love with someone who makes you laugh, right?

Since April is “National Humor Month,” our friends at SKOUT, the global app that helps you meet people and expand your social circle, asked 3,372 of their members their thoughts about profile photos and also did a deep dive into the topics of humor, friendship, and more. The results just might get you to ROTFL as you fill your date card.

It’s time to go beyond a smile or a wink once you see these survey results which proves laughter is the best medicine, both online and offline.

The mobile app found that users who posted a photo of themselves laughing, not just smiling, on their profile have had responses that have skyrocketed above all else. It turns out that photos including laughter were favorited 404% more often and 324% more connections were made as compared to the average SKOUT user who wasn’t laughing.

Here are 6 key findings of the SKOUT Humor Survey

1. We’re Our Own Favorite Comedian

A majority of respondents (75%) think they’re funny. SKOUT also found that people with a witty sense of humor are most likely to think that they’re funny (81%).

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2. No One Likes to Laugh Alone

Who doesn’t like making other people laugh? It seems like a majority of SKOUT users agreed and 94% of respondents said they enjoyed making other people laugh.

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3. Our Humor Style’s Effect on Friendships

If “bathroom humor” and practical jokes are your style, you’re most likely to have five or more close friends. However, you’re less likely to have five or more close friends if your humor style is more sarcastic or self-deprecating. Be careful of sending those text messages.

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4. No Clowning Around

Coulrophobia, a fear of clowns, is a pretty common fear in the U.S., but only 30% of respondents said they were afraid of clowns. The survey found that those who have a sarcastic sense of humor are most likely (37%) to be afraid of clowns. Who knew?

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5. Chick Flicks vs. Comedies

When it comes to selecting a movie, the survey found that women were more likely to pass on chick flicks and go for a comedy instead.

Comedy trumped all other movie genres among the women surveyed, with 26% preferring comedy to the 23% that preferred action/adventure, 21% who preferred horror, and 18% who preferred romance movies.

Action and adventure movies were the most common among 43% of men, while comedy came in second as the most popular genre (21%).

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6. Laugh It Up With the Locals

The two cities with respondents who were most confident in their sense of humor were New York and San Francisco (83%).

Are you ready to change your zip code for that extra laugh? If so try heading to Houston, Los Angeles, or Atlanta, where almost everyone surveyed said they enjoyed making other people laugh.

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It’s both April Fool’s Day and National Humor Month, so start showing off your sense of humor in your profile. Enlist the help of a few friends (or us) to help with your profile or to take photos of you the next time you’re rolling on the floor clutching your stomach in a fit of laughter. The candid aspect of the photo will capture you in the moment and you won’t look posed or fake.

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Now go ahead and start laughing.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online and has been coaching singles on finding love for over 20 years.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook. Sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Politics and love. It can be a winning combination or a highly charged debate while on a date.

Tinder has now partnered with Rock The Vote, a non-profit organization with the goal of getting young singles to vote. Their new campaign, “Swipe the Vote” will pop up while swiping on the Tinder mobile app and will ask users to answer 10 questions to help you decide if you’re on the fence.

Tinder stated on their blog that they’ve “been amazed by the amount of users expressing their political views with matches during this presidential campaign.”

“After all, millennials should play a big role in deciding who our next president is,” the company wrote on its blog.

How to Use the Swipe the Vote Feature on Tinder

1. Log on to Tinder or set up a new account by downloading the app and using your Facebook credentials.
2. While logged on to the app, while swiping left and right through potential matches, users will see the “Swipe The Vote” option will come up as a potential match. If you swipe right, a ten-question survey pops up and asking you your opinion on 10 issues ranging from same-sex marriage to oil drilling.
3. If you’re unfamiliar with a specific issue, tapping on the issue gives you general information about the issue as well as what those who support the issue and those who oppose it have to say about it so that users can get well-rounded information.
4. After reading over an issue, users agree or disagree simply by swiping right or left.

Related: This Strategy Ups Your Tinder Game

“Once you’ve swiped through ten of the hottest issues, you’ll be matched with the candidate who best matches your views,” Tinder wrote on their blog. You’ll also be shown how you compare with other candidates too.

Users are also given the option to register to vote, to further encourage users to “Swipe The Vote” and take the initiative to participate in politics, which is the goal of the partners, Rock The Vote.

Tinder released the latest survey results on their blog showing that Bernie Sanders was the top choice for the Democratic nomination, while Republican Ted Cruz was most popular for the opposite party.

Related: These Jobs Get the Most Right Swipes on Tinder

The survey claims the majority of their male users matched with Hillary Clinton (35.5%) versus Bernie Sanders at 32.7%. However, Sanders was the leading choice among women, receiving 43.4% of Tinder votes, while Clinton received 39.9% of female votes.

Note: Swipe the Vote is available for members of all ages, except Tinder Plus members.

Have you registered to vote yet? If not, get involved and help “Swipe The Vote!”

Swipe The Vote will remain on the Tinder platform during this Presidential election season.

Not on Tinder? Head to iSideWith.com to figure out which candidate you best match up with and register to vote here.

Who did Tinder match YOU up with?

Need help with your Tinder profile? Our Swiping Right coaching plan will help you find your dream match.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years. Julie’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook and sign up for our Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

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Here’s a little secret that’s been used over 20 million times by Tinder users to increase their responses by from their match.

Send a GIF (animated video) in your message. We’re sharing 20 of Tinder’s top GIFS with you in case you’re not sure which ones to use.

When Tinder, introduced their GIF button earlier this year to allow users to search through the Giphy database to send a GIF to their match, the impact on getting a response increased by 30%! Plus, using a GIF when communicating with your matches on Tinder means your conversation can last twice as long. After all, your potential date will want o know how you did that or might even ask if you created it on your own. It’s a great ice-breaker.

Think about it. You’re swiping and matching, but then the match either fizzles out, or you don’t hear back from him or her. As a Tinder dating expert, I know there’s a strategy to help you stand out so you can meet your match IRL.

Welcome to the world of Tinder, where many connect and others just sit and wonder why it’s not working for them.

If you’ve spent time on an online dating site such as eHarmony or on a mobile app such as Tinder or Bumble, you’ve probably experienced the awkward moment of not knowing what to say to your digital crush after you’ve matched with them.

Related: Tinder Update Ignites Gifs and New Flirting Features

Tinder co-founder and vice president of product, Jonathan Badeen, told Buzzfeed that “GIFs allow people to better say what they want and express emotion, which is something that’s really difficult to do in text alone.”

Badeen said another benefit is that “It opens up people to start more conversations and to break the ice,” and he couldn’t be more right.

Here’s the top 20 GIFs used on Tinder that will help make that first interaction with your Tinder love a little less awkward and give you something more to say than “hey.”

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We know the default message is “hey” or “hi.” Wouldn’t it be more fun if your match received this gif instead? We think so.

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Who wouldn’t love a heart shaped pizza? It says like, or love, and pizza is a universal language.

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This GIF screams flirt, big time. Toss that hair and look aside. He’ll want to reply to this one.

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Like “hey,” “How you doing” can get a better reaction than just typing the words.

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Can you say, “wow!” Let’s schedule a date on the date card, now!

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How flattering! There’s something sexy about a woman wearing glasses. Taking them off to view you? Yes, she’ll get a reply.

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What a fun way to say hello. Pets can warm anyone’s heart, especially this cute one jumping out of the pool to say hello to you!

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Ding dong. Happy holidays! Here’s a balloon bouquet just for you!

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It’s the oldest line in the book and if written in text form, just might get deleted. However it screams charming in this GIF.

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Don’t say no, when you can say YES! Plus the exclamation point gives it a double whammy.

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Normally we don’t recommend hiding behind shades, but these perfectly manicured nails waiving hello to you is worth a reply.

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Bat those eyelashes for a guaranteed reply to your message.

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A drinking contest? Maybe not, but it’s sure funny and size is important, right?

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Hello cowboy and let’s tip a hat for a reply. Yes!

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It’s not just the ladies who should be batting the eyelashes. That sweet smile deserves a reply.

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Blow him a kiss for a fast and flirty reply.

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How proper and sweet. Ok, it’s a bit goofy, but that will get her attention.

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Can someone save me? Maybe save me from the other guys on Tinder?

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If you wave hello and look like you want to cuddle, your Tinder match just might reply to claim his or her hug.

Wishing you much love and joy on Tinder, or wherever you may roam. xo.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s the CEO and founder of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years. Julie’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online, newly released with a magical epilogue and a fairy tale ending.

Sign up for the Free Cyber-Dating Expert Weekly Flirt newsletter for dating advice delivered to your inbox.

Can you flirt or fall in love just by staring at someone’s eyes?

I remember the first time I fell in love at first sight. There was something about his eyes that captured my attention. I kept staring at him and then turning my head away quickly, a bit nervously. When we finally started talking, it turned out we had the exact same eyes.

I wrote about that experience in my first published book. It wasn’t just about the eyes. It included perpetual smiles as well.

Perhaps I can say we fell in love at first eye-sight. We still talk about the sparkle in our eyes that brought us together to this day. Research has backed up this theory that you can fall in love with someone just through eye contact.

Then again, there are songs about eyes, such as You’re Too Good to be True, Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You, Brown Eyed Girl, Green Eyes Lady, These Eyes, Spanish Eyes, and the list goes on.

Both men and women are visual. Either the see something or someone they like, or they don’t. This is why popular dating apps such as Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge are so popular and singles are swiping right in record numbers. At Cyber-Dating Expert, we recommend that you ditch those sunglasses in your online dating profiles and mobile apps, and make sure your potential date can stare into your sparkling eyes.

Here are 31 facts on how to flirt with your eyes

1. When two people in love gaze into each others’ eyes, their heartbeats synchronize with each other.
2. Your eyes dilate almost 50% wider when you look at someone you love or fancy.
3. When flirting, a woman will look at someone, then quickly look away and wait 30 seconds if she’s interested.
4. Perfect vision makes it easier to fall in love at first sight.
5. Gazing straight into a stranger’s eyes can make them fall in love.
6. Rapid blinking may mean someone is attracted to you.
7. Women will find a man attractive if another woman is looking at smiling at him.
8. When someone who finds you attractive locks eyes with you, they automatically go up a notch on your love barometer.
9. Sparkling eyes show strong emotions.
10. People with a strong connection of love hold eye contact for longer periods of time.

Plus 21 more fun facts in this Infographic below.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt Newsletter.

Bumble, the mobile dating app that lets women take the lead to find a date, has expanded their services to help you find new friends.

It’s a clear way to keep you attached to the app if you’re in a relationship, but are looking for new friends to hang out with, or are just taking a break from dating.

It’s safe to say, this expands their services to be truly called a social networking app.

With their new feature, you can flip back-and-forth from seeking a date, to the BFF mode if you’d like to be in the friend zone.

Here’s how Bumble’s new features work

1. Open the Bumble App or search for it in the iTunes store.

2. Click on the update to get the new features.

3. Go into your settings, where you can search for men, women, men and women, or BFF.

4. Click on BFF, where you’ll officially enter their “Friend Zone.”

5. Remember you cannot look for dates and BFF’s at the same time, as you’ll only be able to search people looking for friends with the BFF feature, not those who are looking for dating.

6. If you’re really looking for a BFF, make sure you set your push notifications to the position.

Plus, like Tinder, Bumble has just added the Giphy feature to this new update. This allows you to send fun and flirty GIFS to other Bumbler’s.

Related: Tinder Update Ignites GIFS and New Flirting Features

At the end of the digital day, we know that relationships can come and go, but having a BFF can help you weather all of your relationship stages.

Remember, this feature was just announced, so you might not be flooded with new friends just yet, but if you find yourself burned out one day and want to take a break from swiping on potential dates, maybe your plus one can be a new friend to hang out with.

In a recent interview on ABC News in Why Women Like Bumble, I discussed how Bumble works.

Watch the ABC News segment

Will you use Bumble to find new friends instead of filling your date card?

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles on finding love online and on their mobile phones for over 20 years. Find out how Irresistible Profiles and Swiping Right can help you find your dream date and sign up for our Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Just released! Our newly revised edition of our bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online, with bonus audio dating advice and a magical epilogue with a fairy tale ending to help you believe in love.

Buy it on Kindle  Buy it on Audible

With millions of daters using mobile dating apps and thousands to pick from, how do you know which site is best for you?

In a recent interview on 7 On Your Side: Can You Find Love Through an App on ABC TV’s KGO in San Francisco, we talked about a few dating apps to help you find love this year.

From Happn to Bristlr, Wingman to Salad Match, there are mobile apps outside of Tinder for you to swipe right and left on.

Watch the full interview on ABC 7.

In this interview, one Bay Area couple using Happn, while riding on the BART train, were notified they were in the same proximity. The couple connected and is a mobile dating success story.

If it wasn’t for the Happn app, they would  have never met, ever. Now the couple has been together for six months.

Happn is one of the thousands of dating apps in iOs and Google Play that help you find a match.

Dating author Julie Spira says some apps are off the charts. Sizzl connects only singles who love bacon and you can decide what pork type you’re really interested in.

“There’s this sort of mystique and magical feel about connecting to someone who has a similar lifestyle to you.”

Other apps mentioned include Twindog, which matches dogs and their owners, and  Wingman, which connects airline passengers who will be traveling on the same flight. Salad Match sets up salad lovers for a salad lunch. And then there’s Bristlr, where you can basically rub faces with someone who has a beard, if that’s your fancy.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years. Julie’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online.  For dating advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter and follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

Bumble, the mobile dating app which gives the women the control to make the first digital move has become a favorite for men and women alike.

In a recent interview on ABC 7 News in Los Angeles, I spoke with reporter Elex Michaelson about what I call the Sadie Hawkins of digital dating.

Watch the Video below by clicking the link.

The best part of Bumble, is the women have 24 hours after a mutual match to initiate contact. After 24 hours, the match disappears, so this helps singles to stay engaged with the process if their goal is to change their relationship status.

The reason men like Bumble, is they’re less likely to get rejected if the woman contacts them. For my dating coaching clients, they like this feature, as they often get tired of swiping right on other mobile apps such as Tinder, without every getting a match or a conversation started.

ABC 7 interviewed single dater  Elana Feldman who said the men were 10 times more attractive on Bumble. Feldman is still looking for her match, so she says, she’ll keep swiping.

We featured Bumble in the Cyber-Dating Expert 6 Best Mobile Dating Apps for 2016, along with Tinder, Hinge, Happn, Coffee Meets Bagel, and Tastebuds, so look a look at the list and try a few mobile dating apps to see which one will be your favorite.

Happy Swiping.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 20 years. Find out about Swiping Right programs for mobile dating and Irresistible Profiles programs for creating an online dating profile to capture his or her digital eye.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

If you’re wondering if your profile photo is the only thing he or she is looking at while swiping left and right on Tinder, it appears singles are becoming a little less shallow. Your career actually matters.

Now that Tinder allows you to include your job and education on your profile, they’ve tabulated a list of the 15 most popular jobs for both men and women to attract a date, swipe, or whatever you might be in the mood for.

According to the Tinder blog, if you’re a male Pilot, Founder/Entrepreneur, or Firefighter, you’re in the top 3 careers that will get more right swipes. We get it. A Pilot can be sexy, but he won’t be around much. A Founder/Entrepreneur might be creative with a big bank balance, or at least some stock options, so he’s got long-term potential. A Firefighter or Doctor will save lives and can become your own personal hero. In short, women loved a man in a uniform.

As for the women, being a Physical Therapist tops the list as men are imagining her personal touch, somewhere, somehow, or anywhere. An Interior Designer was a bit surprising at number 2, but there’s something intimate about decorating a bedroom with candles and more. As far as number 3 is concerned, it’s enlightening to know that a man is interested in both beauty and brains, so kudos to those who want to date a smart and confident woman. Perhaps they’ll remember to leave the Board Room out of the bedroom.

Other top professions on both sides include being a Teacher, College Student, Model, and Personal Trainer.

Women who are in these professions also made the list: PR/Communications,  Speech Language Pathologist, Pharmacist, Social Media Manager, Dental Hygienist, Nurse, Flight Attendant, and Real Estate Agent.

Men who are in these professions also made the list: TV/Radio Personality, Engineer, Paramedic, Lawyer, Financial Advisor, Police Office, and Military.

Here’s the full list.

MEN

1. Pilot
2. Founder/Entrepreneur
3. Firefighter
4. Doctor
5. TV/ Radio Personality
6. Teacher
7. Engineer
8. Model
9. Paramedic
10. College Student
11. Lawyer
12. Personal Trainer
13. Financial Advisor
14. Police Officer
15. Military

WOMEN

1. Physical Therapist
2. Interior Designer
3. Founder/Entrepreneur
4. PR/Communications
5. Teacher
6. College Student
7. Speech Language Pathologist
8. Pharmacist
9. Social Media Manager
10. Model
11. Dental Hygienist
12. Nurse
13. Flight Attendant
14. Personal Trainer
15. Real Estate Agent

Is your profession on this list?

Follow @JulieSpira for online dating advice on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online and Mobile Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been coaching singles on how to find love online for over 20 years. Find out how Irresistible Profiles and Swiping Right services can help you find your dream date.