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Julie Spira – ABC News – Valentine’s Survival Guide

 

With Valentine’s Day just a week away, I sat down with ABC-7’s Coleen Sullivan and Ellen Leyva with a Valentine’s Survival Guide to get you to and through the most romantic day of the year.

Can you find love online in time for Valentine’s Day?

I say yes! With the convenience of your mobile phone, we’ll have you chatting and dating in a digital split second.

Here are 10 Tips to Help You Survive Valentine’s Day With a Hug and a Smile

  • Sign up for a Mobile Dating AppUse your Facebook photos to create a new profile and say “love is in the air.” Have a friend or a dating coach like myself help you with your profile.

 

  • Become a serial dater – This is the time I give you permission to date up a storm. Schedule one date a day until Valentine’s Day. Double-down and schedule two dates a day, where one will surely rise to the top and be worthy of a second date.

 

  • Use Premium Features – Match shows you peak times, where their Top Spot feature will show your profile to get the most visibility for just a few hours. OkCupid’s Boost feature will do the same for 15 minutes.

 

  • Give your date a card – A hand signed card or a love note will warm his or her heart for all dating stages.

 

  • Don’t forget Flowers Two billion dollars will be spent on Valentine’s Day flowers this year. Bring one long-stemmed rose or a dozen tulips to have the same effect, while not breaking the bank.

 

  • Say ‘I Love You’ – If you’re relationship is moving forward, there’s no better time to profess your love than on Valentine’s Day.

 

  • Choose In-Room Dining or Cook a Meal Together – If you’ve waited too long to make a reservation at his or her favorite place, pick up some prepared meals at the grocery store, or ingredients for a spicy romantic dinner. Remember to bring candles.

 

  • The gift of time – Valentine’s Day is about spending quality time together, and there’s not better gift than just being together.

 

  • Valentine’s Breakups – It’s not a great idea, but if your relationship has been sliding downhill since the past holiday season, have a talk with your significant other, sooner rather than later. Valentine’s Day can be filled with pressure, so be kind about it and if you’re going to call it quits, do so in person, and not on the phone, email, or in a text message.

 

  • Singles Awareness Day is on February 15th – If you’re not in the mood to find a Valentine and hate the holiday, there’s no need to fret. The day after will be a holiday to celebrate your single status.

Don’t let the pressure get to you about Valentine’s Day. Some people are still paying off their credit cards from December gift giving. A study shows that 54% plan to spend less than $100 and only 10% of singles spend over $250 on Valentine’s Day.

A survey from OneHourTranslation.com of over 4000 people around the world, showed that 31% plan to purchase their gifts online this year, so there’s still time to send something romantic to your Valentine or digital crush.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and is an award-winning dating coach who’s been helping singles on finding love online for over 24 years. 

SIGN UP for the FREE Weekly Flirt for dating advice delivered to your inbox.

 

 

It’s Showtime – Why the Super Bowl is Like Valentine’s Day

Valentine's Day versus the Super Bowl

It’s officially Super Bowl week and Valentine’s Day is two weeks from today.

I’ve gone on record saying the Super Bowl for men is like Valentine’s Day for women.

Super Bowl Sunday is a sacred day for most American men. It’s showtime as most guys count down the days, hours, and even minutes to their favorite television day of the year.

As we count down the days to the 52nd Super Bowl (LII) at US Bank Stadium in Minneapolis, whether you’re rooting for the AFC championship team, the New England Patriots or the NFC championships team, the Philadelphia Eagles, one thing is for sure, it’s going to be an emotional and exciting two weeks for both men and women alike.

It’s that big of a deal for both sexes and here are the reasons why.

Women often wonder if men hate Valentine’s Day and a report by WalletHub says 53% of women say they’d break up with their significant other if they got nothing for Valentine’s Day. The same report shows that 9 million marriage proposals will take place on February 14th.

 Valentine’s Day is the third-largest consumer holiday of the year, with over $18 billion dollars spent in the name of love!

Back to sports, men often wonder if the women are authentically cheering for their favorite team, or if they really like football at all.

Most men don’t want to be distracted by women while watching the game, unless they’re viewing the cheerleaders on TV. Guys wait all year for this day and romance is put on hold until one team gets the ring, one that doesn’t include a diamond center stone with the promise to have and to hold forever.

We know between football pools and the high cost of advertising, this Sunday will be an expensive day for many.

This year, the Super Bowl Sunday and Valentine’s Day are ten days apart.

With Valentine’s Day being held in the middle of the week on a Wednesday, some decide to celebrate the holiday over the weekend before, on February 10th-12th, or on the long President’s weekend of February 16th- 19th, to avoid the huge expense on that one night of the year.

The pressure on Valentine’s Day is enormous. The pressure for your favorite team to win the title of Super Bowl Champion is at an all-time high.

Valentine’s Day IS the Super Bowl of Dating

These next two weeks are truly a double-header, so enjoy the ride. Most guys won’t even make a dinner reservation or ask a girl out until after Super Bowl Sunday. I encourage you not to wait until the last minute to ask your date to be your Valentine, or you might find out that she’s made other plans.

RELATED: Valentine’s Countdown: How to Land a Date

Whether you’re a sports fan or a hopeless romantic, comparing the two will help you understand how important these days are for the opposite sex.

Why do I think the Super Bowl for men is like Valentine’s Day for women?

Quite simply, both men and women put all of their emotional energies into these two bigger-than-life events. Often, a woman doesn’t understand why watching two teams trying to score is so important to her guy. He just can’t miss this game. It’s the end of the season and the two best teams go for the ring.

Guys on the other hand, simply don’t understand that if you’re dating a woman and forget to plan something, just anything, for Valentine’s Day, you probably won’t get a date with her on February 15th, which ironically is “Singles Awareness Day” or any day after.

Guys, if you’re playing the field swiping right and left on mobile dating apps, or flirting on Tinder and Instagram, if you don’t ask our your digital crush, you lose.

Game over.

Men wait all year for the Super Bowl, this big day in television. Women wait for Valentine’s Day, with the hope that their special guy will either propose, offer to take his online dating profile down, or say “I love you” for the first time.

Women even secretly hope that the guy they are dating might want to change his Facebook status from ‘Single’ to ‘In a Relationship.’ It’s on the digital wish list for women, period.

Are you Prepared for Super Bowl and Valentine’s Day?

Men are very prepared for the Super Bowl. They decide which venue to view the game at and with whom they would like to spend watching the teams battle it out.

Women like to be prepared for Valentine’s Day. They start giving little hints out a month in advance about their favorite romantic restaurant, post photos of jewelry or trinkets on instagram and facebook, all with the hope the the guy they’re dating will take the cue and book a reservation before their favorite eatery is fully booked.

However in contrast, when a man’s favorite team loses the Super Bowl, he will be disappointed, but will get over it. He’ll know there’s another chance next year and will spend the entire football season rooting for his team. If a woman’s favorite beau, or someone she is dating ,doesn’t ask her out for Valentine’s Day, she won’t get over it. Expect a breakup or a big confrontation.

RELATED: 10 Valentine’s Date Ideas that Won’t Break the Bank

She’ll assume he’s romancing another woman and will know she’s not on the top of his list. Chances are, his shelf life as her “number one guy” will immediately expire. Unless he’s out of town on business or in a long-distance relationship, he won’t get another chance to romance her. No woman wants to be at the bottom of the dating totem pole, especially on Valentine’s Day. Expect to be unfriended, or don’t be surprised if she doesn’t return your phone calls or texts.

So whether you like football or not, love or hate Valentine’s Day, remember to talk to the person you are dating about what these days mean to both of you. If you’re single, use this opportunity to accept all invitations for both the Super Bowl and Valentine’s singles mixers. Even if your team loses and you’re dateless on the 14th, you’ll be casting a wider net and expanding your social circle.

Go ahead and accept that Super Bowl party invitation. If you’re single, you just might find a date in time for Valentine’s as well. It’s a win-win for everyone. If you need help with your profile or online dating advice, we’re here to help.

Related: Social Media Rules for Valentine’s Day

Which team will you be rooting for this Super Bowl and do you love, or hate Valentine’s Day?

Julie Spira is America’s Top online dating expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s the CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and has been coaching singles for almost 25 years in finding love online. For more dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

Sign up for our Weekly Flirt for dating advice delivered to your inbox.

7 Ways to Shine During Online Dating’s Peak Season

Peak Season

There was a lot of excitement the first week of January leading up to “Dating Sunday,” a day proclaimed by Match as the busiest day of the year for online dating.

Other sites and apps also saw the surge in activity and joined in on the Dating Sunday excitement, including Plenty of Fish, Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid, and more.

As a guest on KENS TV in San Antonio and KHOU in Houston, I spoke with reporter Jeremy Baker, on why the first Sunday of a new year is always so active.

WATCH TV SEGMENT ON DATING SUNDAY WITH TIPS TO SPEED UP YOUR SEARCH

Baker’s mother met and married his stepfather after meeting in an AOL chat room in the 1990s, and he shares the history of online dating from the early days to the present, where singles are swiping on mobile dating apps.

Now that Dating Sunday is over, what should you do next?

If you missed the spike on Sunday while watching the Golden Globes, there’s no need to fret. Peak season is in full force right now, leading up to Valentine’s Day, just five weeks away.

There’s plenty of time to find love with some of these tips.

To get you armed for in online dating’s Peak Season, here are 7 online and mobile dating tips to help you get lucky, now through Valentine’s Day.

RELATED: Dating Sunday – January 7th Was the Busiest Day for Online Dating

1. Post 5 -7 new photos to your profile and caption them if you can.

2. View and “Like” profiles and photos of 10 people a day during peak season.

3. Log on for 1/2 hour, twice daily to see who has viewed your profile and written to you.

4. Write back to those who are messaging you on dating apps and sites within the 1-4 hours, the sooner the better.

5. Don’t be shy. Make the first move and message someone whose profile looks interesting.

6. Rewrite your profile and include some of your goals for the year. Whether it’s running a marathon to writing your first novel. They’re conversation breakers that make you unique.

7. Turn on push notifications, so you’ll know instantly who’s interested in you.

If you need some extra hand-holding, find out how our Irresistible Profiles will help you find your dream date.

RELATED: Is Dating Multiple People a Good Idea?

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of Internet dating and has been coaching singles on finding love online for over 25 years.

FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook

SIGN UP for the FREE Weekly Flirt for dating advice delivered to your inbox

Photo credit: Fotolia

7 Tips to Get Lucky in Love by Valentine’s

7 Ways to Find a Date for Valentine'sValentine’s is about one week away. Some singles are stressing big time about how to find a date for the most romantic day of the year. Others could care less and will hang out with friends or hide under the sheets alone.

If finding a date for Valentine’s is on your list, I have great news for you. With a little effort and the help of your mobile phone, you can get lucky and find a date by Valentine’s Day.

7 tips for singles to get lucky in love this Valentine’s Day

1. RSVP to all events and parties

Whether it’s a business mixer or speed dating event, go out, dress up, and wear that smile of yours. Check out some events on MeetUp or any singles events and don’t be shy.

2. Update your online dating profile

If your primary shot was from three years ago, it’s outdated. It’s time for a digital facelift to show off the new you. Post photos of a recent trip and caption them if you can. Find a favorite photo or two on Facebook or Instagram. If you got a new puppy add it to your profile, but don’t use it as a primary shot. Mobile dating app Tinder actually reorders your photos showing the best one first.

3. Download 3 mobile dating apps

Research shows that singles are using on average 3 mobile dating apps. They’re so easy to use and you can find a date in minutes, not days. A Pew research survey showed that the number of millennials using dating sites and apps has tripled in the last few years!

4. Be proactive and Upgrade During Peak Times

The squeaky wheel gets the digital love deal. If you’re online, write to 5-10 people a day. Think of it like sending out 5-10 resumes a day if you’re looking for a job, only this is better. You could find the love of your life. Respond quickly and turn on those push notifications to find out when someone hot sends you a message!

Also, you can appear more frequently on sites and apps for just a few dollars.Did you know that OkCupid lets you know when it’s Rush Hour? Match has a Top Spot and Tinder has a Boost? All of them boost your profile to the top of the list in a search, where you can be viewed more than 10 times than normal. Yes, for less than the price of one cup of coffee, it’s worth a shot.

5. Check out your single friends on Facebook 

Have a digital crush? Check out his or her relationship status and if it it says “single,” go ahead and start flirting on Facebook chat. Plenty of couples have found love on the world’s largest social network, as can be seen on FacebookLoveStories.com.

6. Go to a restaurant or coffee shop with WIFI

Working from home? Why be alone when you can be out in public with your computer instead. Make sure to dress up and take walks to the restroom or pass by as many people as possible with a smile on your face. It will become your new office to work and flirt. Stop, stare, and smile.

7. Text an ex 

As a last resort, know that 20% of singles do text their former love on Valentine’s if they’re flying solo. Send a quick Happy Valentine’s message with an emoticon to your former flame. If you decide to do so, do it in the morning, not at night, as he or she might be on a Valentine’s date, or they might look at you as a late night booty call.

Remember, although Valentine’s Day is a big day for couples, the day after, February 15th, is Singles Awareness Day. Either way, love yourself first and love will come your way.

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may swipe or roam. xo

Looking for help with dating? Find out how our Irresistible Profiles will help you find your dream date.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She’s been named the Best Dating Coach of the Year in the 2017 iDate Awards and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. For more dating advice, FOLLOW @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and facebook. SIGN up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.

 
Photo credit: Fotolia

#DateChat Debut – Valentine’s Day. Love It or Hate It?

Date Chat Valentine's

Come one, come all to the Valentine’s session of #DateChat on Twitter.

On Thursday, February 12, 2015 we will tackle the subject of Valentine’s Day.

Questions we will be covering include:

Valentine’s Day. Do you love it, or hate it?

How to Handle Valentine’s Day if you’re in a new relationship?

Valentine’s Gift giving.

Can you still find a date for Valentine’s Day?

How to handle a Valentine’s breakup?

What was your best Valentine’s Day ever?

What was your worst Valentine’s Day ever?

Would you text an ex for Valentine’s Day?

Friends that will be joining us include Dr. Wendy Walsh, America’s Relationship Expert @DrWendyWalsh,  Bruce Sallan, founder of #DadChat @BruceSallan, and Mark Miller, author of “500 Dates.”

If you’re single, are a dating blogger, or just want to hang out in a fun chat filled with dating advice, join us for #DateChat on Thursday at 5pm/PT, 8pm/ET and make sure to head over to #DadChat at 6pm/PT, 9pm/ET where we continue the conversation about Valentine’s Day with Bruce Sallan.

Ready, set, and let’s tweet for your Valentine.

Sample tweets:

Join @JulieSpira for #DateChat on 2/12, 5p/PT, 8p/ET for #Valentines tips #dating https://www.cyberdatingexpert.com/datechat-valentines/

Don’t miss #DateChat on Thursday 2/12 at 5pm/PT for what to get your #Valentine https://www.cyberdatingexpert.com/datechat-valentines/

#ValentinesDay. Love it or hate it? Join @JulieSpira for #DateChat to tweet-and-tell 2/12. 5p/PT, 8p/ET https://www.cyberdatingexpert.com/datechat-valentines/

Valentine?s Day Dating Dos and Don?ts

Valentine's Dating Dos and Don'tsNow that it?s February, Valentine?s Day is just around the corner. I?ve always said that Valentine?s Day for a woman is like the Super Bowl for men, so pick up some red candy hearts, grab your lipstick, and read our 10 tips to prepare for the Super Bowl of Love, Valentine?s Day.

1. Do discuss Valentine?s Day with the person you are dating. If one of you loves the holiday and the other can?t bear it, come up with a compromise. Valentine?s is on a Tuesday this year. Pick a night for a romantic dinner in between the Super Bowl and Valentine?s and avoid the high-priced dining reservations.

2. Don?t wait until the week before to ask her to spend the Valentine?s with you. If you are dating someone special and you know for sure you?d like her to be your Valentine, ask her out at least two weeks in advance.

3. Do make a dinner reservation for February 14th, even if you?re dateless on February 1st. Go ahead and reserve a table and be open to the possibilities. You can always cancel the reservation when it gets closer to Valentine?s Day, if you haven?t already developed a new crush during crunch time.

4. Don?t ask her out for Valentine?s Day in an email or a text message. This is the time for you to either pick up the phone and call or better yet, ask her in person if your relationship is going well.

5. Do try in-room dining this year. Light some candles, cook up a simple meal in the kitchen together and look forward to a steamy dessert.

6. Don?t go overboard with flowers. It?s the thought that counts. Stop by your local grocery story and pick up one long stemmed rose. It has the same impact as the full dozen and is 1/12th the price.

7. Do accept invitations for Valentine?s dances and parties the weekend before February 14th if you?re single. You won?t feel alone with so many other singles in a fun and flirty setting. Wear pink or red for the occasion and say yes if someone asks you to be his or her Valentine. You may not fall in love with your Valentine, but you might just find a new loyal friend.

8. Don?t make gift giving too much pressure. You may still be paying off your credit card bill from the holidays. A card, a hug, and some lingerie and massage oils will make a memorable evening and won?t break the bank.

10. Do wake up in the morning and wish your loved one a Happy Valentine?s Day in a voicemail, email, or text message to let them know that you?re looking forward to spending the evening together. If you?re friends on Facebook and have posted your status as ?In a Relationship,? take it a step further and wish them a Happy Valentine?s Day on their wall.

9. Don?t be blue if you can?t be with your sweetheart on Valentine?s Day. Schedule a SKYPE date, wear red, put on your lipstick, and flirt the night away with your long distance love.

Do you look forward to or dread Valentine?s Day? We?d like to hear your comments.

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, sign up for the Weekly Flirt and Like us at Facebook. Follow Julie on Twitter @JulieSpira

15 Magic Minutes – Ask Me Anything

15 Magic MinutesAre you nervous about Valentine?s Day? Have a burning relationship question that needs to be answered?

Now?s your chance to Ask the Cyber Dating Expert absolutely anything!

In honor of Valentine?s, I?m opening up my private phone line to help you through the sexiest and most romantically challenged weekend of the year for only $27!

A VERY limited number of lucky singles who take advantage of this opportunity to get some love advice ?for only $27!

From questions like should you accept a last minute date to what should you wear on Valentine?s Day, spend 15 MAGIC MINUTES with Julie Spira, a worldwide expert in online dating this Valentine?s.

Have a burning relationship question? Concerned about what to give for a Valentine?s gift?

Not sure which profile photo should be your primary shot?

Wondering why he hasn?t called you back?

Not sure if you should make the first move? Should you text that cute guy back who won?t pick up the phone and call?

For a limited time only through Valentine’s Day,?you?ll have a private phone or SKYPE date to help you get ready for Valentine’s.

This is a VERY Limited Offer and WILL SELL OUT!. ORDER your 15 Magic Minutes with Julie Spira for ONLY $27 NOW.

Match.com Study Shows Single Parents Date More than Singles who are Childless

Single Parents DatingFor those of you who are dating and are wondering if being a single parent will affect your love life, there?s good news for you. Match.com released their biggest singles study ever and the findings showed that not only do single parents go out on more dates than singles without kids, but more single parents (21%) are actively dating as compared to those without kids (16%).

The ?Single in America? study led by Dr. Helen Fisher, biological anthropologist and chief scientific advisor for Match.com? and Chemistry.com? focused on key myths about singles. Dr. Fisher stated, ?I am fascinated to learn that men are just as eager to marry and have children, and more eager to compromise in a relationship.

Some of the key myths in the study included:

Myth: Young singles today are promiscuous.
Fact: More people in the 21-34 age group say they have never had sex. To be precise, 24% of men and 23% of women ages 21-34 are virgins.

Myth: I love you implies a serious commitment.
Fact: 31% of singles believe that ?I love you? means ?I want you in my life? and 30% believe it means ?I care about you.? Only 14% think it means ?I want to spend the rest of my life with you? and 19% that ?I want to have a committed relationship with you.?

Myth: Unemployed means unlucky in love.
Fact: 50% of singles would be open to dating someone unemployed if they found the person interesting.

Myth: Hook-ups never turn into relationships.
Fact: 36% of singles are open to a casual hook-up in the near future; and 54% of singles have had a one-night stand. 35% of singles have had a one-night stand that turned into a long term partnership.

Dr. Fisher appeared on Good Morning America where she stated, ?The single most interesting thing in the study is that 35% of men and women who had initially met someone they found not attractive, eventually later fell passionately in love with them.?

So how does this news affect online daters? Dr. Fisher said that singles are more willing to date outside their faith and ethnicity and the age gap between couples has widened. My advice for singles looking for love online, widen your search parameters on your online dating profile and be more open to the possibilities. Accept that second date and see if the relationship can develop.

Are you a single parent? Are you finding dating challenging or are you making the time and effort to have a love life? Comments are welcome.

For more details of the study, visit https://blog.match.com/singles-study/

For Lovers and Lovers in Waiting Live Chat

I’m super-excited to have been selected by GenConnect to host their live Valentine’s chat this week, “For Lovers and Lovers in Waiting.”

Click on the link below on Thursday, February 3rd at 3:30pm, EST/ 12:30pm/PST for a live Q & A, where I’ll answer all of your relationship questions leading up to Valentine’s Day. I know how stressful Valentine’s can be. I see all the red candy hearts in the grocery store. Regardless of your relationship stage, take a moment and join our live chat. The best part is, one person will win an Irresistible online dating profile, valued at $495.

Our hashtag on twitter is #gCLove so you can follow the conversation.

Live Chat With Cyber Dating Expert Julie Spira

Valentine’s Etiquette – Dos and Don’ts for Your Valentine

Valentine's Day Etiquette

Christmas was barely over when the stores turned their holiday red into holiday hearts in preparation for Valentine?s Day.

As we?re a few weeks away from the day that women dream about every year and that some men purposely book business trips to avoid the pressure of the season, it?s time to take a look at the dos and don?ts for Valentine?s Day for every type of love stage.

1.???? Do make a dinner reservation for February 14th. Even if you don?t have a date in mind, go ahead and reserve a table on OpenTable.com. Many restaurants book up in January. You can always cancel the reservation if you find yourself dateless on the days leading up to Valentine?s.

2.???? Don?t ask her out for Valentine?s Day in an email or a text message. This is the time for you to either pick up the phone and call or better yet, ask her in person if your date is going well.

3.???? Do discuss Valentine?s Day with the person you are dating. If one of you loves the holiday and the other can?t bear it, come up with a compromise. Valentine?s is on a Monday this year. Pick a different night for a romantic dinner and make it a special date night on one of the days leading up to the 14th.

4.???? Don?t go overboard with flowers. It?s the thought that counts. Stop by your local grocery story and pick up one long stemmed rose. It has the same impact as the full dozen and is 1/12th the price.

5.???? Don?t wait until the week before to ask her to spend the Valentine?s with you. If you are dating someone special and you know for sure you?d like her to be your Valentine, ask her out at least two weeks in advance.

6.???? Do try in-room dining this year. Light some candles, cook up a simple meal in the kitchen together and look forward to a steamy dessert.

7.???? Don?t make gift giving too much pressure. You may still be paying your credit card bill from the holidays. A card, a hug, and some lingerie and massage oils will make a memorable evening.

8.???? Do accept invitations for Valentine?s dances and parties the weekend before February 14th. You won?t feel alone with so many other singles in a fun and flirty setting. Wear red for the occasion and say yes if someone asks you to be his or her Valentine.

9.???? Don?t be blue if you can?t be with your sweetheart on Valentine?s Day. Schedule a SKYPE date, wear red, and flirt the night away with your long distance love.

10.?? Do wake up and wish your loved one a Happy Valentine?s Day in a voicemail, email, or text message to let them know that you?re looking forward to spending the evening together.

Do you look forward or dread Valentine?s Day? We?d like to hear your comments.

Like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert