Cyber-Dating Expert®

To Dump Or Not To Dump In An Email

With modern technology and our addiction to our Blackberries and iPhones, pushing the send button has become as common as brushing your teeth.

My friends at Your Tango wrote an article today in favor of the easy-way-out called Is It OK To Break Up Via Email? We Say Yes. Here’s my dating advice on the subject.

I’m a firm believer that you should think before sending an email to show your anger towards a loved-one, and more specifically, I don’t believe in dumping your significant other in an email or a text message.

Sure if you have only had a few dates, sending an email to say “I’m not the one for you. Good luck with your search” can be considered polite as compared to the guy who just doesn’t call you back.

In my book, The Perils of Cyber-Dating, I describe the Top 10 Rules of Netiquette for Online Dating. One of these rules is the “Break-Up Rule.” It’s number ten on my list. It’s relationship 101.

? Never break up with a significant other in an email. It?s just common courtesy to have a conversation and preferably in person.

I was once the recipient of a very well thought out break up email. ?I was advised by the man that I was engaged to marry, that I was no longer a fiance. From where I sat, it was cowardly, cruel, and unilateral. ?I never spoke to him again. It was a relationship that started and ended in cyberspace.

I’m a believer that you treat someone the way that you want to be treated. Do you really want to go down in history as the person who dumped your LTR via email? Remember, emails are easily forwarded.

I’d be interested in all thoughts and comments.

Julie Spira is the Digital Matchmaker® and America's Top Online Dating Expert. She's an award-winning certified dating coach who's been helping singles find their perfect match for over three decades. Follow @JulieSpira on IG and @digitalmatchmaker on TikTok.

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