If you think that swiping left and right on mobile dating apps is the quickest way to snag a date, I encourage you to cast a wider net.
When it comes to digital dating or flirting on a variety of social networking apps such as SnapChat, Twitter, Instagram or Facebook, the need to respond quickly takes over. I say, take a big digital breath and follow these steps to do it right.
In a recent interview for the magazine SOS Solteiros in Brazil, I shared some of my favorite flirting tips for dating on Instagram.
- Take it Slow. There’s a fine digital balance between being social media friendly, or coming across as a stalker. Start out by following your digital crush’s feed on Instagram and wait a few days before you start clicking on the heart to like his or her updates. Resist the urge to obsess over their Instagram page and instead, add locations to your posts on Instagram to enhance your own posts.
- Search for Favorite Hashtags. If you’re a basketball fan, search for the hashtag of #basketball and start following people who post frequently on that subject. If you’re a music lover, make sure your posts have the hashtag of #music and look for others who are passionate about music, concerts, or musical instruments.
- Turn on Post Notifications. If you want to make sure to find out when your digital crush posts a new photo on instagram, you can easily be notified. To do so, click on their profile. Click on the three dots on the upper right hand corner of their profile. In the drop down, click on “Turn on Post Notifications.” Boom. You no longer have to stalk their profile to see what they’ve been up to.
- Comment every few days. Once you have started following someone you’d like to get to know better, start commenting on their posts. Take it a step further and make sure to mention their Instagram handle in your comment. For example type, What a great quote @JulieSpira! This way the person will get notified that they’ve been mentioned by you and can respond.
- Use Emoticons and Emojis. They are fun and flirty and belong in your comments. Hearts, smiley faces, musical notes, apple pie. You get it. Go less on the word count and ramp up those cute icons to show you indeed are a digital flirt.
- Start Chatting Privately. Since Instagram doesn’t let you chat privately, head over to Facebook and send a friend request, but only after you’ve spent time commenting on each other’s posts. If your advances are one-sided, and they aren’t following you back, don’t send a friend request, as you might appear like a stalker. If you have friends in common on Facebook, there’s a greater chance your new crush will accept your request.
Are you flirting and finding love on Instagram? We’d love to hear your stories.
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. For digital hand-holding, check out Irresistible Profiles and sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.