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Valentine’s Survival Guide

It’s Valentine’s week and time once again to publish our annual Cyber Dating Expert Valentine’s Day Survival Guide.  Valentine’s Day falls on a long weekend, so get ready for 3-4 days of like or love and everything red.

At Cyber-Dating Expert HQ we’ve been hard at work putting together everything you need to have the perfect Valentine’s Day weekend.  From date ideas, to gifts that won’t break the bank, and even how to fill your date card in time for Valentine’s weekend.

Without further digital ado, here’s our 2016 Cyber-Dating Expert Survival Guide.

How To Pimp Your Profile for Valentine’s Day

Watch this video to hear Julie share her thoughts on the best online dating profile tips with Andre Senior from ABC 13 News Now.

Valentine’s Gifts for Every Relationship Stage

We know the pressure of Valentine’s is on. You can’t help but notice the red candy boxes everywhere you go. If you’re wondering what to get the new person you just started dating for Valentine’s Day, or perhaps want to get something for your long-time love, gift selection can be confusing, regardless of your relationship status. [Read more]

25 New Valentine’s Day Ideas

From going ice skating with your love to a scavenger hunt filled with fun and loving surprises on the way, or even visiting a brewery together, we’ve got a ton of creative date ideas to impress your date. [Read more]

What to Do on Valentine’s Day When You’re Single

Keep swiping! If you’re single, and on Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, Happn or other mobile dating apps, stay in and see who you can meet through your mobile phone. You never know who you could end up scheduling a date with for the day after Valentine’s Day. [Read more]

Why Valentine’s for Women is Like the Super Bowl for Men

Now that the Super Bowl is over, it’s time for the Super Bowl of Dating. Women wait for Valentine’s Day, with the hope that their special guy will either propose, offer to take his online dating profile down, or say “I love you” for the first time. Women even secretly hope that the guy they are dating might want to change his Facebook status from “Single” to “In a Relationship.” [Read more]

Could Your Valentine Be Just A Click Away? Life After 50 Magazine

Dating over 50? Read our featured article in Life After 50 magazine filled with tips on how to join a dating site, create an irresistible profile, and start filling your date card. [Read article]

10 Valentine’s Day Date Ideas That Won’t Break the Bank

From taking a dance lesson or cooking class, to going to a wine tasting or amusement park, here are 10 ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your significant other that are great for daters on a budget. [Read more]

How To Land a Date for Valentine’s Day

Start searching for love by logging on to dating sites every day leading up to Valentine’s Day and keep swiping right. You can also try attending singles events in your area in the hopes of finding a potential date. More in our article on how to land a date for Valentine’s weekend. [Read more]

Signs Your Relationship Is Ripe For A Valentine’s Day Breakup

We know many relationships don’t go the distance, but a Valentine’s breakup can hurt, big time. Here are some signs that your relationship is headed towards an end. If you’re not feeling the relationship, you’ll stop texting them as much as you usually do. If they feel similar, they’ll do the same. [Read more]

Related: Peril of the Week – The Valentine’s Breakup

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

The Perils of Cyber-DatingNewly released: Our completely revised edition of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Now available as an audio book in Audible and on Kindle. Listen to the magical epilogue with the fairy tale ending to help you believe in love.

Valentine’s Gifts for Every Relationship Stage

Is gift giving for Valentine’s always complicated? We know the pressure of Valentine’s is on. You can’t help but notice the red candy boxes everywhere you go.

If you’re wondering what to get the new person you just started dating for Valentine’s Day, or perhaps want to get something for your long-time love, gift selection can be confusing, regardless of your relationship status.

Here’s our Valentine’s gifts cheat sheet for all relationship statuses.

Newly dating – If you’ve only had a few dates and aren’t exclusive yet, bringing her 1 dozen red tulips will brighten her Valentine’s Day. You won’t be splurging for expensive roses or going overboard, but will still have the impact of bringing her flowers. Start her day off by sending her a fun Valentine’s e-card. I’m a big fan of Jib-Jab, where you can customize the card with a photo of yourself or send a video card. Bringing her lingerie sends a message that you’re only looking for sex (who isn’t?), but at this point she should be selecting her her own lingerie. A gift card for a mani/pedi will always be appreciated.

Going Steady – Honeymoon Phase (1-3 months) – If you’ve been dating for a month or two, she’ll be expecting to be your Valentine’s date if geography doesn’t get in the way. At this point, bring her a gift certificate for a massage at her favorite spa, offer to cook her a meal and have in-room-dining and bring flowers.  Other fun items include sending her a box of chocolate covered strawberries, or bringing a bottle of her favorite wine or champagne. This way you can feed each other when it’s time for dessert.

Getting Serious – Imperfect Phase (4-6 months) – By now you’ve become an item. You might have even changed your Facebook relationship status to “In a Relationship” and have a drawer at her place. When you’re headed towards the half-year mark, she’ll want to receive roses from you. There are plenty of great sites online for you to order flowers from, or you can go to your local grocery store to pick up a dozen. When a woman doesn’t get flowers on Valentine’s Day, she starts to wonder if you’re still swooning over her. If you’ve taken a trip away together, bring her a personalized gift such as a silver framed photo of the two of you to memorialize your vacation together.

Totally in Love – Over 6 months  Once you’re headed towards the one-year mark, it’s time to up the ante in the love department. She’s going to want something very personal. If jewelry is in your budget, getting her a sterling silver heart necklace, trinket, or bracelet from Tiffany & Company, may end up on your list. If it’s too pricey, you can order a less expensive one on Amazon to show her that you care. For those of you ready to step it up, but aren’t ready to pop the Q, give her a lovely commitment ring. It will show you have all 10 toes in, without getting engaged or setting a wedding date.

It’s Complicated – The ex and almost ex – If your relationship is winding down or you’ve recently broken up, should you acknowledge someone who you didn’t go the distance with? Studies have shown that 20% of singles actually text an ex on Valentine’s Day. Whatever you do, don’t send mixed messages and send flowers to someone, when you’re in the arms of another. Trust me, it will sting. You can send them a birthday present, congratulate them on their new job, and call them on holidays to say hello. That is acceptable for every holiday, but Valentine’s Day. If you’ve moved on, sending chocolate covered strawberries shouldn’t be on your gift list. The best gift you can give, is the gift of time, so you both can move on.

What will you be giving as a Valentine’s gift this year?

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of Internet dating and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. Julie’s the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online.

Sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter for dating advice.

 

Why the Super Bowl for Men is Like Valentine’s for Women

Valentine's Day versus the Super BowlIt’s officially Super Bowl week.

As we count down the days to Super Bowl 50 at Levi Stadium, whether you’re rooting for the Denver Broncos or the Carolina Panthers, one thing is for sure, it’s going to be an emotional and exciting two weeks for both men and women alike.

Women often wonder if men hate Valentine’s Day. Guys really want to know if women are cheering for their favorite team, or are they there just for the half time show.

This year, the Super Bowl and Valentine’s Day are exactly one week apart. Women get a bonus, as Valentine’s is on a three-day holiday weekend. Yes indeed. You can be romantic Friday, February 12th through Monday, February 15th with no excuses.

Valentine’s Day is the Super Bowl of Dating

I’ve gone on record as saying the Valentine’s Day for Women is like the Super Bowl for Men. It’s a double-header, so enjoy the ride. Most guys won’t even make a dinner reservation or ask a girl out until after Super Bowl Sunday. I encourage you not to wait until the last minute to ask your date to be your Valentine.

RELATED: HOW TO LAND A DATE FOR VALENTINE’S DAY

Here’s my side-by-side comparison of the Super Bowl and Valentine’s. 

Super Bowl Sunday is a sacred day for most American men. It’s showtime as most guys count down the days, hours, and even minutes to their favorite television day of the year.

Meanwhile, across the hall, women have their own favorite holiday to think about, Valentine’s Day. With these two major events exactly one week apart, it’s obvious that the Super Bowl for men is revered in the same way as Valentine’s Day is for women. Whether you’re a sports fan or a hopeless romantic, comparing the two will help you understand how important these days are for the opposite sex.

Why do I think the Super Bowl for men is like Valentine’s Day for women?

Quite simply, both men and women put all of their emotional energies into these two bigger-than-life events. Often, a woman doesn’t understand why watching two teams trying to score is so important to her guy. He just can’t miss this game. It’s the end of the season and the two best teams go for the ring.

Guys on the other hand, simply don’t understand that if you’re dating a woman and forget to plan something, just anything, for Valentine’s Day, you probably won’t get a date with her on February 15th, or shortly after. Guys, if you’re playing the field on mobile dating apps or flirting on Tinder, if you don’t ask our your digital crush, you lose. Game over.

Men wait all year for the Super Bowl, this big day in television. Women wait for Valentine’s Day, with the hope that their special guy will either propose, offer to take his online dating profile down, or say I love you for the first time. Women even secretly hope that the guy they are dating might want to change his Facebook status from ‘Single’ to ‘In a Relationship.’ It’s on the digital wish list for women, period.

Are you Prepared for Super Bowl and Valentine’s Day?

Men are very prepared for the Super Bowl. They decide which venue to view the game at and with whom they would like to spend watching the teams battle it out. Women like to be prepared. They will start giving little hints out a month in advance about their favorite romantic restaurant, with the hopes the the guy they are dating will take the cue and book a reservation before their favorite eatery is fully booked.

However in contrast, when a man’s favorite team loses the Super Bowl, he will be disappointed, but will get over it. He’ll know there’s another chance next year and will spend the entire football season rooting for his team. If a woman’s favorite beau or someone she is dating doesn’t ask her out for Valentine’s Day, she won’t get over it.

RELATED: 10 VALENTINE’S DATE IDEAS THAT WON’T BREAK THE BANK

She’ll assume he’s romancing another woman and will know she’s not on the top of his list. Chances are, his shelf life as her “number one guy” will immediately expire. Unless he’s out of town on business or in a long-distance relationship, he won’t get another chance to romance her. No woman wants to be at the bottom of the dating totem pole, especially on Valentine’s Day. Expect to be unfriended, or don’t be surprised if she doesn’t return your phone calls or texts.

So whether you like football or not, love or hate Valentine’s Day, remember to talk to the person you are dating about what these days mean to both of you. If you’re single, use this opportunity to accept all invitations for both the Super Bowl and Valentine’s singles mixers. Even if your team loses and you’re dateless on the 14th, you’ll be casting a wider net and expanding your social circle.

Go ahead and accept that Super Bowl party invitation. If you’re single, you just might find a date in time for Valentine’s as well. It’s a win-win for everyone. If you need help with your profile or online dating advice, we’re here to help.

Related: Social Media Rules for Valentine’s Day

Which team will you be rooting for this Super Bowl?

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. For more dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, sign up for our Weekly Flirt and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.

JUST RELEASED: Our 2nd edition of The Perils of Cyber-Dating is now available on Kindle and as an audio book, narrated by the author.

Listen to our book trailer here.

10 Valentine’s Date Ideas That Won’t Break the Bank

Valentine's Dating IdeasIf you’re wondering what to do for Valentine’s Day and are on a budget,  we’ve come up with 10 out-of-the-box, fun and creative Valentine’s Day things to do with your significant other or date.

If the idea of buying a box of chocolates and one dozen roses sounds so cliché to you, you’ll enjoy these activities, regardless of your relationship status.

Let’s help you make it an evening, or weekend to remember.

1. Take a Dance Class Dancing to tango music can be very romantic. Dress up for the occasion and find a class near you. If tango isn’t your style, try salsa or hip-hop as an alternative. It will get your body moving and can get you in the mood for a romantic and memorable evening. Even if you can’t find a class anywhere, take your Valentine dancing at a local spot with live music anyway!

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2. Create a Digital Scavenger HuntWe know you’re attached to your mobile phones and tablets (it’s okay, so are we), so create a little mystery with your very own personalized scavenger hunt. Not sure where to start? Begin the day with a “Happy Valentine’s Day” text and send the first clue. When she arrives at the destination, send her a second clue requesting a Skype or FaceTime chat where you can wish each other a Happy Valentine’s Day, video style. Third, send another text message on where you’d like her to go next. Have her pampered with a manicure or pedicure to get ready for your big date night, or even send her to a spa for a relaxing massage. Fourth, at the end of the day, post a lovey picture of the two of you on her Facebook page for her and her friends to ‘like.’ Finally, send her a digital invitation with the exact location for your Valentine’s date. Remember to take photos along the way and share them on all of your social media accounts so everyone can see how you celebrated with you love.

Related: How to Land a Date for Valentine’s

3. Go Ice Skating.  Whether it’s ice-skating or roller-skating, take your Valentine to the closest rink in town. You’ll find yourselves reminiscing about your childhood memories, while you get a little physical activity. Remember to catch her if she falls!

4. Book His-and-Her Massages.  Having warm oil massaged into your body is surely a treat. If your relationship hasn’t moved in that direction yet, book Swedish massages for the two of you in separate rooms, so you both can enjoy the experience and compare notes afterwards and say hello to relaxation.

5. Go Wine TastingMany local wine bars allow you to stop by and taste several options before deciding on your favorite selection. Take your date to a bar known for their wine tastings, where you both can get a wine card for samples and compare notes. At the end of the night, buy him or her their new favorite bottle for the two of you to share on another date night.

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6. Enjoy In-Room Dining.  If you’ve waited until the last minute and realize that your date’s favorite restaurant is already booked, no need to fret! Pretend you’re on vacation and opt for an in-room dining alternative. You can take care of the appetizers and main course, but ask your date for input on the dessert the menu. Create great ambiance with candles, music, rose petals, and perhaps a bouquet of red tulips, if roses aren’t in your budget. After that romantic dinner, there’s not need to get a room. You’re already there.

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Related: Would you Text and Ex for Valentine’s

7. Make it About Music. There’s something uber romantic about sharing music with the one you love (or like). Plus, Shakespeare said, “If music be the food of love, play on.” Make your Valentine’s a night of music.   Buy your Valentine a music CD or create a playlist, then stay in and watch a recorded concert on TV. Download a mobile app where you can name that tune and see who wins.Make a music playlist for him or her as a gift, then go out to hear some live music together. If your date’s favorite band might be playing in the near future, surprise them and pick up some tickets as a gift. Hello Coachella and Stagecoach! If the show is months away, watch some live concerts on TV together and download some music to listen to together, so you can get pumped for the concert.

8. Go to an Amusement Park.  There’s something romantic about riding the Ferris wheel,  especially when it stops and you’re feeling like you’re on top of the world. Remember to kiss your Valentine when you’re staring at the stars together. Then hold your date tight as you ride the roller coaster together. Show them you’re there to protect him or her. Snap some photos and post them on Instagram (with permission from your date).

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9. Take a Cooking Class.  Guys actually enjoy being creative in the kitchen. It helps with relaxation, so take him to a cooking class, where the two of you can whip up a fancy meal. Find a place to go for dessert together, with your menus in hand and order chocolate. It’s the ultimate aphrodisiac.

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10. Go to a Fortune Teller or Psychic.  He love me, he loves me not? Stop by a fortune teller or card reader with your Valentine to see what the future will hold. Don’t worry, you don’t need to kiss-and-tell after your turn.

P.S. Take your profile down before Valentine’s Day. It’s a leap of good faith that will help you have a Happy Valentine’s Day.

How will you be celebrating Valentine’s Day this year?

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Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and is the CEO of CyberDatingExpert.com. Julie and her team create Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more relationship advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt Newsletter and follow @Julie Spira on Instagram and Twitter.

View our book trailer for The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online, NEWLY REVISED with a magical epilogue and Bonus Audio Dating Advice.

 

Valentine’s Dating: How to Land a Date for Valentine’s

Valentine's Day - CyberDatingExpert.com

Valentine’s Day. Love it, or hate it?

We’re about one month away from the most romantic holiday of the year.

Here’s our Valentine’s Survival Guide.

If you’re single, there’s no need to hide under the covers. If you’re dating someone, but he hasn’t asked you to be his Valentine just yet, here are some tips to enjoy the day, regardless of your relationship status. Remember, Valentine’s is on a weekend this year and it’s also during President’s Day weekend, so think big and be optimistic. It’s time to fill your date card.

1. Ramp up Your Online Search

Let’s face it, everyone seems to be online theses days, so if you’re not logging on EVERY day, checking your matches and responding quickly to his or her emails, someone else just might get their attention faster. It’s true what they say that the squeaky wheel gets the deal. If you can carve out time to go to the gym, you should be able to schedule time to log on daily. Make sure you’ve signed up for push notifications of when someone has emailed you or made you their favorite so you can respond quickly. Ditch the old waiting game rules. This is how to stand out in the digital dating world.

2. Keep Swiping Right

If you’re on Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, Happn or other mobile dating apps, make sure your notifications are turned on and swipe right several times a day to view your matches. When you get a mutual match, respond quickly and always use their first name when you are saying hello. Remember not to say “hey,” as horses hang out in hay. Got it?

Read: 6 Mobile Apps You Should be Using in 2016

3. Text an Ex

Did you know that 20% of singles do text an ex on or around Valentine’s Day? So if both of you are single, why not get together and go down memory lane. Make sure you’re on the same page and just enjoy the evening. You may not be rekindling, but the familiarity might just make it a fun evening rather than flying solo.

4. Attend Singles Events

The one thing about singles events is, everyone is in the same boat. They’re single and are hoping to connect with someone. Check out Match.com’s Stir events in your city, RSVP to a MeetUp for a subject you’re passionate about, and attend business networking events. The more you’re out there in the public, the more opportunities you have to flirt with a potential date. Remember not to be too coy. Be bold and smile. Dr. Pat Allen, author of “Getting to ‘I Do,'” suggests the five-second stare. It may feel like an eternity, but it may bring you closer to that cute guy across the room. P.S. Remember to wear red! It’s the color of love and romance and research has proven that guys respond more often to women wearing red. .

Related: Read Valentine’s Survival Guide

5. Don’t Go Overboard

From going to an amusement park to ride the Ferris Wheel to taking a cooking class or going ice skating, make Valentine’s Day a no-pressure experience if you’re in a new relationship and aren’t exclusive yet. There’s no need to break the bank.

Related: Read 10 Fun Valentine’s Date Ideas

Being single on Valentine’s isn’t the end of the world. Sure you go into stores and see nothing but boxes of red candy and roses throughout the grocery stores, but a new survey from U.K. online dating site Smooch.com shows that only 10% of the 2000 singles polled actually love Valentine’s Day. Are the other 90% pretending to go along with the program?

Grab your BFF’s, dress in pink or red, and head to the movies or a concert together. Valentine’s Day isn’t always about love. It’s about spending quality time with someone you really like.

Are you a fan or foe of Valentine’s Day?

Photo credit: Fotolia

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and Instagram.

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

P.S. Our newly revised version of our bestselling book is coming out for Valentine’s Day as an audio book. You won’t want to miss hearing the Epilogue, guaranteed to warm your heart.

Valentine’s Survival Guide

Valentine's Day Etiquette

This Valentine’s Day falls on a long holiday weekend and comes complete with a full moon, so if you’re thinking about leaning in for that first kiss, don’t be shy. A full moon can bring out the romance just about any time of the year.

We’re back with our Valentine’s Survival guide, complete with social media etiquette, fun date ideas, and are proud to share out latest interview in the New York Times about Tinder and mobile dating apps to ramp up your search to find that perfect Valentine.

Read: Led by Tinder, the Mobile Dating Game Surges in the New York Times

With out further digital ado, here are some of our articles and dating tips to bring the love back in your life, or at least make sure that you’re not hiding under the covers on a holiday weekend.

 

Valentine's Dating IdeasTen Fun Valentine’s Date Ideas

From riding the Ferris Wheel to a scavenger hunt, find out why in-room-dining at home can be one of the most romantic ways to celebrate Valentine’s Day, regardless of your relationship status.

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Would You Text an Ex on Valentine’s Day? 20% Said Yes!

Being single on Valentine’s isn’t the end of the world. Sure you go into stores and see nothing but boxes of red candy and roses throughout the grocery stores, but a new survey from U.K. online dating site Smooch.com shows that only 10% of the 2000 singles polled actually love Valentine’s Day. Are the other 90% pretending to go along with the program?

FBHeartSocial Media Rules for a Happy Valentine’s Day

From Twitter to Facebook, Pinterest to Instagram, find out what to post, or not to post on your favorite social networks.

DON’T: Tag your new boyfriend on Facebook. Chances are he hasn’t told his buddies and work pals about his Valentine’s plans.

DO: Post a photo if you’ve received flowers, a fun gift, or of the dessert at dinner. Everyone loves to view the photos and will cheer you on with ‘likes.’

DON’T: Post your Happy Valentine’s message on your date’s wall. Saying you can’t wait until the evening together should remain private. Remember, a simple post may be innocent. However your friends might wonder what kind of wild night the two of you will be having. Or worse yet, his ex-girlfriend might start posting inappropriate comments to ruin your evening.

DO: Send a digital gift, such as his or her favorite band on iTunes, an e-card, or a redeemable gift card to a store or restaurant.

DON’T: Send a musical montage of ‘I Love You’ songs if you haven’t said those three little words yet.

DO: Ask for permission before you post anything online. Remember you’re creating a permanent digital footprint and your status and photos can be shared, even by people you don’t know.

DON’T: Overshare. Remember, many of your friends are single and may not be enjoying the day.

DO: Make an exciting announcement. If you become engaged on Valentine’s Day, your friends will want to know.

DON’T: Change your Facebook relationship status to ‘In a Relationship’ until both of you have had the talk and agree to be on the same digital page.

Do you have any social media rules for Valentine’s Day?

Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam this Valentine’s.

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and join us for #DateChat on Thursdays at 5pm/PT on Twitter.

 

Why the Super Bowl For Men is Like Valentine’s For Women

Valentine's Day versus the Super BowlTwo of the most important days of the year for men and women respectively are Super Bowl Sunday and Valentine’s Day. This weekend is sacred for most American men. It’s showtime, as most guys count down the days, hours, and even minutes to their favorite television day of the year, Super Bowl Sunday.

As we countdown to  Super Bowl XLIX in Arizona, whether you’re rooting for the Seattle Seahawks again or the New England Patriots, one thing is for sure, it’s going to be an emotional and exciting two weeks for both men and women alike. Whether you’re a sports fan or a hopeless romantic, comparing the two will help you understand how important these days are for the opposite sex.

Some questions I always hear from women are, “Do men hate Valentine’s?” Guys want to know, “Do women really love the Super Bowl halftime show, or do they show up enthusiastically to meet men or to pretend to like sports with them?

I’ve gone on record as saying the Valentine’s Day for Women is like the Super Bowl for Men.

These two calendar days are about two weeks apart, so enjoy the ride. Guys, don’t wait until the last minute to invite the object of your affection or digital crush out for Valentine’s Day. Ladies, if you’re single, do find a Super Bowl party to go to or make a reservation at a sports bar to enjoy the day.

Meanwhile, across the hall or on your mobile phone, women have their own favorite holiday to think about, Valentine’s Day.

Why do I think the Super Bowl for men is like Valentine’s Day for women? Quite simply, both men and women put all of their emotional energies into these two bigger-than-life events. Often, a woman doesn’t understand why watching two teams trying to score is so important to her guy. He just can’t miss this game. Guys on the other hand, simply don’t understand that if you’re dating a woman and forget to plan something, just anything for Valentine’s Day, you probably won’t get a date with her on February 15th, or anytime thereafter.

Men wait all year for the Super Bowl, this big day in television. Women wait for Valentine’s Day with the hope that their special guy will either propose, offer to take his online dating profile down, or say ‘I love you’ for the first time. Women even secretly hope that the guy they are dating might want to change his Facebook status from ‘Single’ to ‘In a Relationship.’

Men are very prepared for the Super Bowl. They decide which venue and with whom they would like to spend watching the big game. In January, many women start giving little hints about their favorite romantic restaurants, hoping their guy will take the cue and book a reservation before the venue becomes full.

However in contrast, when a man’s favorite team loses the Super Bowl, he will be disappointed but will get over it. He’ll know there’s another chance next year and will spend the entire football season rooting for his team. If a woman’s favorite beau or someone she is dating doesn’t ask her out for Valentine?s Day, she won’t get over it. She’ll assume he’s romancing another woman and will know she’s not on the top of his list. Chances are, his shelf life as her number one guy will immediately expire. Unless he’s out of town on business or in a long-distance relationship, he won’t get another chance to romance her. No woman wants to be at the bottom of the totem pole, especially on Valentine’s Day. Expect to be unfriended, or don’t be surprised if she doesn’t return your phone calls or texts.

So whether you like football or not, love or hate Valentine’s Day, remember to talk to the person you are dating about what these days mean to you. If you’re single, use this opportunity to accept all invitations for both the Super Bowl and Valentine’s singles mixers. Even if your team loses and you’re dateless on the 14th, you’ll be casting a wider net and expanding your social circle.

Go ahead and accept that Super Bowl party invitation. If you’re single, you just might find a date in time for Valentine’s as well. It’s a win-win for everyone. If you need help with your profile or online dating advice, our special 15 Magic Minutes is going on through Valentine’s Day.

And speaking of Valentine’s Day, here are some gift ideas to embrace and those Valentine’s gifts to ignore.

Related: Social Media Rules for Valentine’s Day

Which team will you be rooting for this Super Bowl?

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and has been helping singles find love on the Internet for 20 years with her Irresistible Profiles coaching programs.  For more dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, sign up for our Weekly Flirt and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.

Countdown to Valentine’s Day – How to Snag a Date

Valentine's Day - CyberDatingExpert.com

Valentine’s Day. Love it, or hate it?

We’re about one month away from the most romantic holiday of the year.

Here’s our Valentine’s Survival Guide.

If you’re single, there’s no need to hide under the covers. If you’re dating someone, but he hasn’t asked you to be his Valentine just yet, here are some tips to enjoy the day, regardless of your relationship status. Remember, Valentine’s is on a weekend this year and it’s also during President’s Day weekend, so think big and be optimistic.

1. Ramp up Your Online Search

Let’s face it, everyone seems to be online theses days, so if you’re not logging on EVERY day, checking your matches and responding quickly to his emails, some other girl just might get his attention faster. It’s true what they say that the squeaky wheel gets the deal. If you can carve out time to go to the gym, you should be able to schedule time to log on daily. Make sure you’ve signed up for notifications of when someone has emailed you or made you their favorite so you can respond quickly. Ditch the old waiting game rules. This is how the digital dating world words.

2. Keep Swiping Right

If you’re on Tinder, Hinge, or are using the mobile dating apps from your favorite online dating site, make more of an effort to log on and swipe right to your matches. It’s really a numbers game. Unless your match is advertising for a hookup or looks like an ax murderer, swipe right and take a moment to say hello. A guy will be flattered to see the notification that you’re digging him digitally. Remember to take your relationship from online to offline so you can meet IRL.

3. Attend Singles Events

The one thing about singles events is, everyone is in the same boat. They’re single and are hoping to connect with someone. Check out Match.com’s Stir events in your city, RSVP to a MeetUp for a subject you’re passionate about, and attend business networking events. The more you’re out there in the public, the more opportunities you have to flirt with a potential date. Remember not to be too coy. Be bold and smile. Dr. Pat Allen, author of
“Getting to I Do,” suggests the five-second stare. It may feel like an eternity, but it may bring you closer to that cute guy across the room. P.S. Remember to wear red! It’s the color of love and romance and is known to attract men.

Related: Read Valentine’s Survival Guide

4. Text an Ex

Did you know that 20% of singles do text an ex on or around Valentine’s Day? So if both of you are single, why not get together and go down memory lane. Make sure you’re on the same page and just enjoy the evening. You may not be rekindling, but the familiarity might just make it a fun evening rather than flying solo.

5. Don’t Go Overboard

From going to an amusement park to ride the Ferris Wheel to taking a cooking class or going ice skating, make Valentine’s Day a no-pressure experience if you’re in a new relationship and aren’t exclusive yet. There’s no need to break the bank.

Related: Read 10 Fun Valentine’s Date Ideas

Being single on Valentine’s isn’t the end of the world. Sure you go into stores and see nothing but boxes of red candy and roses throughout the grocery stores, but a new survey from U.K. online dating site Smooch.com shows that only 10% of the 2000 singles polled actually love Valentine’s Day. Are the other 90% pretending to go along with the program?

Grab your BFF’s, dress in pink or red, and head to the movies or a concert together. Valentine’s Day isn’t always about love. It’s about spending quality time with someone you really like.

Are you a fan or foe of Valentine’s Day?

Photo credit: Fotolia

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter

Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more online dating advice like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt newsletter.

Would You Text an Ex?

smoochthumbnailBeing single on Valentine’s isn’t the end of the world. Sure you go into stores and see nothing but boxes of red candy and roses throughout the grocery stores, but a new survey from U.K. online dating site? Smooch.com shows that only 10% of the 2000 singles polled actually love Valentine’s Day. Are the other 90% pretending to go along with the program?

Do you find this a bit shocking? According to Smooch, Valentine’s is a time for singles to feel even more single.

Smooch.com Marketing Manager, Lucy Clarke, said of the findings;

“Valentine’s Day is a time to celebrate dating, whether you?re single or in a relationship. But with Valentine?s Day campaigns aimed at couples everywhere you turn at this time of year, it’s hardly surprising that the day makes singletons feel even more single.”

Their findings even included that 16% of singles actually lied about receiving a Valentine and 63% wish they did have a date on Valentine’s Day.

So let’s get to the subject of texting. It’s rare on any holiday to NOT hear from an ex. Whether it’s Thanksgiving, New Year’s, Christmas, or Valentine’s, some singles can’t help but reach for the phone to connect with an ex. It’s a non-threatening way of sending a little digital love.

How should you say “Happy Valentine’s Day” to an ex via text? Are you concerned that sending a text doesn’t mean you’re looking to rekindle a spark or end up in bed? Not necessarily. Often singles have fond memories of spending Valentine’s with someone from their past. Perhaps that romantic trip you took 5 years ago is still on his or her minds.

Although Smooch discourages singles from texting an ex, I disagree. Valentine’s can be a warm and fuzzy day or a day that can be filled with disappointments from the unrealistic expectations. I’m all for texting an ex, as long as it’s not to rekindle the spark within a few hours. Keep it friendly. Say, “Happy Valentine’s Day….Thinking of you and hope you’re doing great.”

The best times to send a text to an ex is in the morning. Keep it simple and friendly. Don’t ask your ex if he or she has a Valentine or is in a relationship. You broke up for a reason. If you do receive a text from an ex, don’t read more into it than just a simple friendly exchange. If you’re in a relationship, hold back from texting an ex. If your current sweetheart happens to see your text exchange on your phone on the most romantic day of the year, you might end up getting the cold shoulder or be sleeping alone that night.

Would you text an ex on Valentine’s Day? Your comments are welcome.

Smooch.com Valentine's Infographic

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and celebrity dating coach. She’s the founder of CyberDatingExpert.com and author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating. Julie creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the Free Weekly Flirt.

 

Are the Super Bowl and Valentine’s Created Equally?

Valentine's Day versus the Super BowlAs we’re counting down to Super Bowl Sunday in New Jersey, whether you’re rooting for the Seattle Seahawks or the Denver Broncos, one thing is for sure, it’s going to be an emotional and exciting two weeks for both men and women alike.

Some questions I always hear from women are, “Do men hate Valentine’s?” Guys want to know, “Do women really love the Super Bowl halftime show, or do they act enthusiastically to keep their guys happy or to met men?

I’ve gone on record as saying the Valentine’s Day for Women is like the Super Bowl for Men. It’s a double-header this month, so enjoy the ride and guys, don’t wait until the last minute to invite the object of your affection or digital crush out for Valentine’s Day.

This weekend is sacred for most American men. It’s showtime as most guys count down the days, hours, and even minutes to their favorite television day of the year, Super Bowl Sunday.

Meanwhile, across the hall, women have their own favorite holiday to think about, Valentine?s Day. With these two major events less that two weeks apart, it’s become obvious that the Super Bowl for men is revered in the same way as Valentine’s Day is for women. Whether you’re a sports fan or a hopeless romantic, comparing the two will help you understand how important these days are for the opposite sex.

Why do I think the Super Bowl for men is like Valentine’s Day for women? Quite simply, both men and women put all of their emotional energies into these two bigger-than-life events. Often, a woman doesn’t understand why watching two teams trying to score is so important to her guy. He just can’t miss this game. Guys on the other hand, simply don’t understand that if you’re dating a woman and forget to plan something, just anything for Valentine’s Day, you probably won’t get a date with her on February 15th, or shortly thereafter.

Men wait all year for the Super Bowl, this big day in television. Women wait for Valentine’s Day with the hope that their special guy will either propose, offer to take his online dating profile down, or say ‘I love you’ for the first time. Women even secretly hope that the guy they are dating might want to change his Facebook status from ‘Single’ to ‘In a Relationship.’

Men are very prepared for the Super Bowl. They decide which venue and with whom they would like to spend watching the big game. In January, many women start giving little hints about their favorite romantic restaurants, hoping their guy will take the cue and book a reservation before the venue becomes full.

However in contrast, when a man’s favorite team loses the Super Bowl, he will be disappointed but will get over it. He’ll know there’s another chance next year and will spend the entire football season rooting for his team. If a woman’s favorite beau or someone she is dating doesn’t ask her out for Valentine?s Day, she won’t get over it. She’ll assume he’s romancing another woman and will know she’s not on the top of his list. Chances are, his shelf life as her number one guy will immediately expire. Unless he’s out of town on business or in a long-distance relationship, he won’t get another chance to romance her. No woman wants to be at the bottom of the totem pole, especially on Valentine’s Day. Expect to be unfriended, or don’t be surprised if she doesn’t return your phone calls or texts.

So whether you like football or not, love or hate Valentine’s Day, remember to talk to the person you are dating about what these days mean to you. If you’re single, use this opportunity to accept all invitations for both the Super Bowl and Valentine’s singles mixers. Even if your team loses and you?re dateless on the 14th, you’ll be casting a wider net and expanding your social circle.

So go ahead and accept that Super Bowl party invitation. If you’re single, you just might find a date in time for Valentine’s as well. It’s a win-win for everyone. If you need help with your profile or online dating advice, our special 15 Magic Minutes is going on through Valentine’s Day.

And speaking of Valentine’s Day, here are some gift ideas to embrace and those Valentine’s gifts to ignore.

Related: Social Media Rules for Valentine’s Day

Which team will you be rooting for this Super Bowl?

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. For more dating advice follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, sign up for our Weekly Flirt and like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert.

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