Looking for Love Online?
A new Pew Research Center study was released in time for Valentine’s with good news for daters both young and old. Your chances of finding a date or a soul mate have increased dramatically just in the past two years.
A new Pew Research Center study among 2,001 adults from June 10-July 12, 2015, has found that online dating has nearly tripled for singles 18-24 and more than doubled for singles 55-64.
Largest Users of Online and Mobile Dating are Young Americans 18-24
According to the survey, young Americans 18-24 now make up the largest percentage of users to online dating sites and mobile dating apps, with most of them using mobile dating apps that weren’t around when the survey was taken two years ago.
Attitudes Towards Online Dating Continue to be Favorable
The good news is that 80% of those who have used online dating sites agree that online dating is a good way to meet people. Say goodbye to the stigma and hello to finding love online. At Cyber-Dating Expert, we’ve been coaching singles from college-age to baby boomers for years now, so we are pleased to see the research back up our own work.
Some of the reasons for the growth in acceptance to online dating is that it allows singles to find a better match by meeting a lot of people, and it has become an efficient way of meeting someone new.
We know that Tinder has led the way for mobile dating app use for singles 18-24, who are constantly attached to their smartphones. We know they often swipe right, without paying attention to the photos on the screen. Yet, if you ask any single person now, they’ll be comfortable in letting you know that they are using a mobile dating app.
The Whole Family is Dating Online Now, Well, Almost
What’s interesting to note is that their single or divorced parents are looking for love online now in record numbers as well. With many baby boomers becoming single by divorce or the death of a spouse, they are finding online dating a source of hope in getting back out there in the dating world, a world where mobile apps didn’t exist while they were raising their kids.
So if you’re at the dining room table and you’ll probably notice that both mom and her kids are swiping left and right to fill their date cards.
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If date night consists of binge watching Breaking Bad or Orange is the New Black with your date, you’re not alone.
Netflix released the results of a survey of 1,008 American Netflix users between the ages of 18 and 29 to find out what Netflix meant in their relationship with their significant other. According to the results, 25% of people get “Show Goggles” and find their crushes or significant others more attractive based on the shows they watch.
Compatibility is also very important, not just in your relationship, but in your show preferences. 27% insist that show compatibility is very important, which makes a lot of sense. If your S.O. won’t binge Archer with, how are you supposed to be together?
So how do you know if you’ll be binge watch compatible? For starters, post your favorite TV shows in your online dating profile to see if you have shows in common with a potential date. With over 1/2 of those surveyed using TV show titles to attract a date, make sure to use those keywords where you can, including listing the show on the 6 things you can’t live without on OkCupid, or stating it in your Match or POF profile.
Making Your Relationship “Netflix Official”
I’ll admit, my ex-boyfriend and I had a Netflix love affair. I still have the password to his account and with his permission am able to continue viewing shows as my leisure. A majority of respondents (51%) agreed that sharing a Netflix password means that the relationship is serious, while 17% won’t share a password until they’re engaged.
Date Night Decisions
Staying in and watching Netflix together is a great way to spend a casual date night. Over 1/2 of those surveyed said they use Netflix as a way to bond with their significant other.
If you’ve ever negotiated over shows with your boyfriend or girlfriend, know that you’re not alone. 65% of respondents engage in negotiations over which show to watch, and 35% trade show for show.
Remember: Couples that stream together, dream together.
Infographic courtesy of Netflix. View full infographic here.
Newly released: Our completely revised edition of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Now available as an audio book in Audible and on Kindle. Listen to the magical epilogue with the fairy tale ending to help you believe in love.
At Cyber-Dating Expert, we listed Happn as one of our favorite mobile dating apps to use in 2016.
As reported in Business Insider, Happn, the app that sends you notifications if you happen to cross paths with someone in your neighborhood or favorite watering hall, has added a new voice feature to their mobile dating app.
Happn now has 10 million members and is growing in popularity, hoping to catch up to Tinder, as their release shows they expect to reach 30 million users by the end of 2016.
Happn co-founder and CEO Didier Rappaport said in a statement: “This new voice feature provides our members with another opportunity to connect on a more personal level and create meaningful relationships.”
“The voice is something that is very emotional,” the French entrepreneur continued. “Just listening to the voice of someone else can give you a lot of impression.”
If you’re worried about your safety, don’t fret. You can only use the voice feature when both people agree to do so.
As mobile dating apps continue to grow in popularity, we will continue to keep you posted on new apps to shorten the search to help you find your dream date.
Here’s our review of Happn.
Remember Craig’s List Missed Connections? Happn is a more modern day approach to matching with someone you’ve already crossed paths with, but never really connected. Every time you pass by a spot with another member IRL, you’ll get an instant push notification that another member is nearby and boom, you can meet instantly. Some may find it very efficient. Others may think it’s creepy, and might not want to meet after a sweaty yoga class. But then again, they wouldn’t be on this app if that were the case, so go ahead and be spontaneous. If you think you might miss out on a digital crush who hangs in the same h0od as you, but are on the shy side, this app is for you. Note: The app was created in France and is available in 25 cities around the world. They are starting to expand in the U.S. and may not have rolled out in your city yet.
How it works: Download the app and log in to Facebook, where yo can edit which information in your Facebook profile that you want to appear in your bio. You must enable your location services for the app to work. Every time you cross paths with another member, it will appear on your timeline feed. You can like someone’s profile by tapping on the heart button. If the feeling is mutual, you’ll be notified and you’ll be considered in the crush stage. You can also view how many times your paths have crossed. If you want to take it a step further, men can pay to to send a charm. There is no cost to women at this point. Charms are similar to Tinder’s “Super Like” feature, except you buy them in a package. Each charm is equal to using one credit.
Why we like it: You won’t have to wonder about the one who got away. You can also now sync with Instagram to see your potential date’s feeds and interests.
Are you using Happn?
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating and Mobile Dating Expert. She’s the founder of Cyber-Dating Expert, where she’s been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.
It’s an honor to be a featured speaker at the Internet Dating Conference, iDate-2016 to be held in Miami, Florida on January 25 – 27th.
iDate is the online dating and mobile dating industry conference with executives from online dating sites and matchmakers who will meet to discuss the latest industry trends.
Cyber-Dating Expert has been attending the iDate conference for the past eight years and is a proud sponsor of the Internet Dating Conference.
We all know that online dating is a HOT topic in the news. My panel, Managing the Headlines: How to Get Press will be held on Wednesday, January 27th at 2pm at the Kovens Conference Center in Miami, USA in room 110. My presentation will immediately follow the session, Match.com Going Public and Projected Forecasts for the Dating Industries, presented by Mark Brools of Courtland Brooks and Alex Harrington from Snap Interactive.
In my session, we’ll discuss the hottest news stories of the past year. I’ll talk about which headlines to respond to and which ones to avoid to show your business in the best light. From Tinder pro to Valentine’s Day, I’ll be sharing my secrets on how I became a top online dating expert and go-to person in the media, having been featured in over 650 news stories on the subjects of Internet dating and mobile dating.
I’ll also be presenting the award for Best Mobile Dating App at the iDate Awards on January 26th, so grab your tux and gown and head on down to Miami.
Join me at iDate in Miami. You can purchase your tickets here to save $75 on your registration.
Follow me on Twitter @JulieSpira, where I’ll be sending out live updates from iDate-2016.
This Sunday, January 3rd will be the busiest day of the year for online dating. Are ready for the ride?
Every year, the Sunday after New Year’s is a reflective time for singles. Perhaps you were flying solo on New Year’s or were in a relationship that ran it’s course.
Either way, it’s time for a new beginning and the huge amount of new memberships to online dating sites will happen on the Sunday after New Year’s Eve.
Match reports that 24% more signups will occur on #DatingSunday with 8:52pm/ET being the most active time of the day. They see a 60% spike in new singles searching for love during peak season. With one million new dates happening during this period, those are numbers worth bragging about.
PlentyofFish expects 81,000 signups on Sunday and are expecting 2 million signups in the month of January. Singles who join during the first week of January, will find their partner an average of two weeks faster than those who sign up later, taking an average of just 10 weeks compared to an average of 12 weeks throughout the year.
At Cyber-Dating Expert, our phone has been ringing and the text messages have been flying. We know that it’s peak season now through Valentine’s Day, so grab your smartphone and download the latest mobile dating apps and get ready to fill your date card!
On the Match blog, I wrote about the peak dating period between Christmas and Valentine’s Day.
Here are some of the reasons why January 3rd is the busiest day of the year for digital dating.
Sunday is the most active day.
All year round at the end of the weekend on Sunday nights, it’s the busiest time for singles logging into dating sites. If your weekend date was so-so (or you were dateless), logging on to chat, flirt, and browse means opportunities to fill up your date card and start the week anew are plentiful. Multiply this big time with the start of a New Year, and you’ll see the activity soar.
A disappointing holiday can make you feel blue.
Emotions around Christmastime and New Year’s are at an all-time high if you’re single. Watching your friends post lovey-dovey shots on Facebook and Instagram or change their status to “In a Relationship” or “Engaged” can hit a nerve, big-time. It’s enough to make you scream, “Bah, humbug” and turn off both your computer and phone to unplug, but just temporarily.
Holiday breakups are high.
Some people stay in dead-end relationships so they won’t be alone through the holidays. It’s a dreadful feeling to know that you’re with someone you can’t see yourself going the distance with long-term. Thoughts of another New Year’s Eve with that feeling isn’t something you’ll want to repeat. Often, couples will break up right after the New Year, or even before Christmas, in order to not to go through another holiday with the wrong person. It’s normal for relationships to run their course, but when it happens at the holidays, it brings a whole new group of fabulous singles to the dating party at the first of the year. There’s a reason they say, “Out with the old, in with the new” at New Year’s.
If you find yourself in the middle of a break up, read my article on The Huffington Post, How to Break Up Gracefully.
New Year’s resolutions include finding love.
New Year’s Day is on a Friday this year. It’s the beginning of a quiet weekend and a time to reflect about the past year and come up with a list of goals for 2016. After watching football games and going to New Year’s Day parties solo, singles often think about new beginnings. From joining a gym to going on a diet, the list often includes finding someone to have a meaningful relationship with.
The squeaky wheel gets the digital love deal.
During peak dating season, Match reports that about 50 million messages are sent. Think about it. Wouldn’t you be happy to receive at least 10 of those emails from someone you could have chemistry with? Rather than sitting back and waiting for your inbox to fill up, remember that the more engaged you are, the greater chance you’ll have to fill up your date card. That means logging on several times a day so your profile stays active, viewing your daily matches every day and liking and messaging other members to start a convo, right now.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo
Join Match.com with our 20% off promo code.
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Baby it’s cold outside! It’s that time of year when holiday invites are pouring in and your single status might make you want to hide under the covers.
It’s safe to say that emotions are flying high during the holidays for singles, new couples not sure how to define themselves, those who have had a recent breakup, and those who are tired of hearing from their relatives about their relationship status.
The holiday period from Thanksgiving to New Year’s brings up a lot of emotions. In the words of Fleetwood Mac’s Stevie Nicks from the song Dreams, it’s natural to think of memories of what you had and what you lost. The band also sings about how “You make loving fun” so don’t turn down the volume just yet. Listening to music this time of year can give you both strength and send you down memory lane.
One thing I know for sure, is my phone is ringing with singles wanting to connect and meet someone new to share the holidays with, so there are plenty of singles looking for love online now.
Still, I know how tough it is at the holidays being single. I’ve been there. I’ve been watching the abundance of posts on Facebook of couples who are changing their relationship status to “In a Relationship.” If your status isn’t that in that category, it can be a digital stab to your heart.
I’m here to tell you that this is actually the best time of year to meet someone wonderful to date. Filling your date card with quality people is quite possible, so take away that frown and look at my tips in our holiday survival guide.
The Cyber-Dating Expert Survival Guide to Help you Through the Holidays, Online and IRL.
1. Don’t rely on Social Media to go down memory lane
Sure I know it’s natural to take a peek to see what your ex is up to, but if they’re jetting off to Paris, heading for sunshine in Hawaii and kissing under the mistletoe, you’re hurting yourself big time. Instead, try to create your own new memories. Walk down a festively decorated street and snap a few photos of trees, store windows, and cheerful pictures and post them on your Facebook wall. So what if you’re alone or with your BFF. You’re out of the house and not living in the past. Digital snooping is also on the rise, especially during the holidays. It brings out the worst in many. At PlentyofFish, they surveyed over 9000 of their users between the ages of 20 -40 to find out what their holiday dating habits were. POF found that 82% of the women were actually checking the Facebook statuses of guys they were dating to see what they were doing when they weren’t around. Wouldn’t you be better off out, than attached to your phone?
2. Fill that date card and stay organized
Anxiety can be at an all time high, but joining a few dating sites and using mobile dating apps will be a great ego boost. It will also give you the chance to meet a lot of people. However, don’t embarrass yourself by calling Don, Doug or introduce yourself as Jackie from PlentyOfFish if you met him on eHarmony. The easiest way to do this is by creating an excel spreadsheet and logging your conversations. You would do this for a job, right? Well this is a job with a possibility of a lifetime of love. It’s worth the effort.
3. Block your ex’s profile
If you’ve recently ended a relationship with someone you met online and it wasn’t on good terms, chances are you’ve both rejoined the site to meet others. Make sure you block his or her profile so they don’t appear in a search and to avoid the obsessiveness that results when you check to see when they last logged on or if they’ve deactivated their profile. Don’t assume if their profile is gone that they’ve ridden off into the sunset with someone else. Sometimes people just take a break or they may have blocked you.
4. Don’t jump into a rebound relationship
They say the easiest way to get over someone is by replacing them in a New York minute with someone new, but is it right? Sure the initial infatuation stage is a lot of fun and it’s nice to have a warm body around, but finding someone new when you aren’t ready to date isn’t always the answer. Spend time with friends, hang out with an ex that you’re still on good terms with and can be yourself with, and spend time alone reading, writing, or taking a cooking class or French lesson.
5. Discuss holiday gift giving
Before you run off to Tiffany to get him sterling silver cufflinks engraved with his initials after three weeks of dating, ask yourself how overwhelming it would feel if he showed up with an engagement ring one month in. It could be over the top, right? Come up with a reasonable budget. Perhaps you can get him a cashmere scarf or sweater, tickets to a concert or sporting event, and make home made cookies. You could get her a gift certificate to a spa, gourmet chocolates, a fun accessory for her mobile phone, tickets to a show or a museum exhibition, or a piece of costume jewelry in her favorite color. Avoid giving her just lingerie, unless it’s something she picks out for herself.
6. It’s Peak Season for Online Daters
The good news is that more singles are signing up for dating sites between Thanksgiving and Valentine’s Day. Match reports they see a jump of about 25-30% in new members signing up between Christmas and Valentine’s Day and at Cyber-Dating Expert, it’s the busiest holiday season ever with new singles joining online dating sites and brand new dating profiles being created.
7. Swipe Right
I know you’re attached to your mobile phone. Perhaps you’re waiting for a text from that cutie you had a date with last week. Maybe you’re swiping left to every potential match. I say, take a chance and swipe right more than left. Even if he or she won’t be your dream date, they might invite you to a holiday party or introduce you to a friend. It’s time to cast a wide net.
8. Accept ALL holiday invitations
If your inbox is filled with invitations for holiday mixers, fill your calendar and put on your party dress. Remember to smile at everyone. Business networking events are in abundance now, so you won’t have to feel that you’re the only single person there. Walk in with confidence and you’ll be turning heads and filling your date card.
9. Online Love is a year-round event
People meet online and fall in love all year long. I know a couple that met online on Christmas Eve on Facebook who are now engaged. I know of another couple that met online on eHarmony on Valentine’s Day who are now happily married. One couple fell in love at first sight that met on Match. She hadn’t had a serious relationship in over 10 years and now they’re married. Yes online dating is a numbers game. You’ll be juggling dates, canceling dates, rescheduling dates, it’s exhausting, but it can be so very rewarding as it has been for millions of others.
10. Fall in love with you
At the holidays, please take a deep breath; log on to fill your date card if and when it feels good to you, not because you’re feeling lonely. If you need to take a break from dating, that’s fine. There are no rules, other than to fall in love with yourself first. It’s the best place to be to start any new relationship.
Wishing you much love and joy in cyberspace this holiday season, or wherever you may roam.
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert. She was an early adopter of the Internet and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. She’s the CEO of CyberDatingExpert.com, author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. She creates Irresistible Profiles for singles on the dating scene and helps them shorten their search to find their one in 50 million.
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My how time flies! It’s hard to believe that we are in the final month of the year, the month where we celebrate with friends and loved ones, decorate our homes, and fill our calendars with holiday parties.
December is also the time of year where singles want to couple up BIG time and looking for love online is at the top of the list.
I shared in a previous blog the article in the New York Post, where a survey from our friends at Match showed that the number one gift for singles is…. a date. Yes indeed. Finding a date for the holidays ranked higher than picking out the latest tech gadget.
With that in mind, here are 5 online and mobile dating tips to help you find love and your one in 50 million online.
- Swipe Right. Yes. Apps like Tinder are responsible for some serious relationships, so ditch your old thoughts about hookups only with mobile dating apps and start swiping right.
- Favorite your Digital Crush. Online dating is a numbers game, but it’s so easy to get lost in the digital shuffle. To stand out, Super Like your match on Tinder, say yes to your daily matches on Match, and favorite or hot list someone to get their attention
- Don’t Wait. Initiate. Just because someone viewed your profile, doesn’t mean you should sit back and wait for the email to arrive. To fill your date card, you MUST be proactive. That means logging in daily, seeing who viewed your profile, and writing to 5-10 new people a day.
- Snap New Photos. While your Facebook and Instagram profiles are up-to-date with fresh new photos, your online dating profile just might need a digital face-lift. The first place to start is with the photos. Grab a few from your social networking sites or better yet, enlist the help from a friend who has a great digital camera. Snap 100 photos in 5 different outfits and have a photo selection party with your BFFs. They’ll help you select the best pics. P.S. Remember to wear red and ditch the little black dress. Red is the color of love, passion, and the stop sign. It’s also the signature color for the holidays.
- Meet IRL. The point of Internet dating isn’t to have a digital pen-pal. It’s to meet someone amazing who you click with, who you can think about every morning when you wake up. You can’t find him or her if you don’t take your relationship from online to offline. Schedule a short phone chat and if the chemistry is there, add him or her to your date card and meet in person.
As always, I wish you much love and joy in cyberspace, or wherever you may roam. xo
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and online dating and has been helping singles find love online and on their mobile phones for over 20 years. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.
A few years ago on Cyber Monday, The New York Post published an article that caught the eye of many singles entitled, Best Holiday Gift is a Date.
Forget the lingerie or tech gifts, if you’re single, you really want a great date, right?
On a day where shopping frenzy is at an all time high, singles are more worried about finding a date. It’s true that finding a date for the holidays is the number one stress for singles now.
Match says their traffic increases by almost 23 percent during the holidays. They claim that 59.5 percent of those polled said they’d prefer a kiss over a new laptop on New Year’s Eve.
Match found that 48 percent of respondents listed in their poll said finding someone to share the holiday with as their biggest end-of-the-year worry, while only 23 percent said they’re most anxious about finding the perfect present.
As an online dating expert and relationship coach, I agree with their findings.
Remember, if you’re a single woman who wants to couple-up, there are many single men who feel the same way during the holidays.
Let me help you find your dream date for the holidays and make it a better experience for you by creating your Irresistible online dating profile.
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of Internet dating and has been helping singles find love online and on their mobile phones for over 20 years. For more dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the FREE Weekly Flirt newsletter.
Our friends at OkCupid had a bit of a digital facelift recently. Among the changes to help you find love online more quickly, you might notice that you no longer can search for someone by their username anymore.
A recent study showed that LOVE is the number one most popular search term for single searching on OkCupid. But what if you suddenly can’t find his or her profile anymore?
While they’ve refined the site to help you browse for matches more easily, taking a peek at that cute hunk or hottie that you have a digital crush on might be a little bit more difficult.
If you’re wondering how to find his or her Internet dating profile, the good news is you can still browse and search for a user, but getting there is a bit more complicated.
Here’s how to find a profile on OkCupid based on the username:
1. Log onto OkCupid on your desktop.
2. Click on your profile thumbnail on the top right hand side of the screen.
4. Type in the user’s name in the box where it says search by username.
5. If their profile is active, it will appear and you can now click on their profile.
To make it simpler, type in this URL below in your browser while logged on to OkCupid. It will take you directly to the “Find a User” page. Remember, unless you’re an “A List” where you can browse anonymously, or are using the new Incognito premium feature, which hides your profile from being viewed by users who you haven’t liked or messaged, users will see that you recently visited their online dating profile.
Are you using OkCupid? What do you think of the recent changes to their site?
To find out more about how to create an Irresistible Profile to find your dream date, visit IrresistibleProfiles.com.
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of online dating and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. For more online and mobile dating advice, follow @JulieSpira on Twitter and sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter.
In this fun-filled hour on the radio, we talked about the early days on Internet dating, how I became an online dating expert, tips on what makes a great online dating profile photo, why singles swipe right and left on Tinder and other mobile dating apps, niche dating sites such as ChristianMingle and JDate and ‘catfishing’ and more.
When asked why online dating works so well, with one out of three relationships starting online, I explained that Internet dating is efficient. It’s available 24-hours a day. You can be sitting at work one moment, get a push notification on your mobile phone and be on a coffee date within minutes.
Tony wondered why people sign up for dating sites when they can date on Facebook for free, and I chimed in that Facebook could be the world’s largest dating site, if they wanted to be.
Listen to this replay of our live broadcast for everything you need to know to be successful with online dating.
For more online dating advice, sign up for the free Weekly Flirt newsletter and follow @JulieSpira on Twitter.
Julie Spira is America’s Top Online Dating Expert and Digital Matchmaker. She was an early adopter of the Internet and online dating and has been helping singles find love online for over 20 years. For help with your online dating profile check out IrreistibleProfiles.com and SwipingRight to help find your dream date.