20 Tips from Female Dating CEOs at Silicon Beach Fest

Photo: Left to right: Jennifer Kelton, Kelly Steckelberg, Talia Goldstein, Julie Spira

Dating and looking for love? In case you missed it Silicon Beach Fest, it was an honor and joy to put together the first-ever Female Dating CEO panel for a lively discussion on the dating industry, relationships, and tips for online dating profiles and safe dating.

The panelists included some of the busiest women running dating and matchmaking companies, who took the time to collaborate on an informative panel and answered questions from the audience.

Collectively our businesses represented 30 years of dating industry, matchmaking, mobile apps, and coaching experience. We talked about the big elephant in the room, Tinder, and how it has affected our businesses as well as your dating experience.

Here are some of the advice we dished at SBF16.

Panelists

Kelly Steckelberg, CEO of Zoosk and Lively Mobile App

Jennifer Kelton, CEO of Bad Online Dates and BOD Dating App

Talia Goldstein, CEO of Three Day Rule, a Matchmaking Company

Julie Spira, CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert and Online Dating Expert

Kelly’s Top 5 Tips from Zoosk:

• Use a full body shot as your primary photo, as you’re 200% more likely to get responses to your messages.
• You will get 50% fewer responses if the primary photo is a group photo. (Guys will wonder, which one are you?)
• No pets in your primary photo.
• Talk about yourself and what’s interesting about you, not about what you’re looking for in that person.
• Use Spellcheck. The Zoosk study about grammar and spelling showed it had a huge effect on success rate.

Jennifer’s Top 5 Tips from BOD Dating App:

• Grammar, grammar, grammar! No matter how good looking they are, grammar matters.
• Be authentic in who you are. You’ve gotta keep it real. You don’t need to have your profile be a dissertation, but don’t put something out there that’s not genuine.
• Don’t post bathroom selfies or a photo of a party scene. I realize that I’m probably not going to have a lot in common with that person.
• You’ve got to think about safety first. Don’t ever meet somebody not in public, even after a few dates.
• Don’t post selfies in the steamy bathroom mirror. Find a friend to take your photos.

Talia’s Top 5 Tips from Three Day Rule

• Women need to be proactive and reach out to men.
• Don’t post “distractor” photos where you are looking at almost everything in the photo, but the person (maybe they’re hiding behind a leaf).
• Don’t post a mysterious other man or woman. The person viewing the profile will wonder, is this your husband or brother?
• Do be chivalrous and open a door.
• The League’s recent study said women wearing white dresses do well in the app, as well as men wearing suits.

Julie’s Top 5 Tips from Cyber-Dating Expert

• Ditch the little black dress and wear red in your profile. It’s the color of love, romance, and men view and write to women more often wearing red.
• Don’t post goofy photos wearing a gorilla suit. Leave that for Comic Con.
• Don’t get hung up on someone’s weight, height or distance.
• Check out your potential date’s photos in Google.com/images to see if they match who they are.
• Use social media to verify if your date looks the same and see if you have friends in common. Ask your friends if they will give the thumbs up or down on your date.

Follow our panelists on Twitter @zoosk @badonlinedates @threedayrule @JulieSpira

Visit: Zoosk.com, BodDatingApp.com, ThreeDayRule.com and CyberDatingExpert.com

 

 

 

Meet Dating CEOs at Silicon Beach Fest

It’s an honor and joy to put together a panel of female dating CEOs at Silicon Beach Fest, being held at the Marina del Rey Hotel on August 24 – 27th.

 

Our panel will include Kelly Steckelberg, CEO of Zoosk; Jennifer Kelton, CEO of BOD Dating App;  Talia Goldstein, CEO of Three Day Rule, and myself Julie Spira, CEO of Cyber-Dating Expert.

The Dating CEO panel will be held at 4pm in the Waterfront Room and you’ll learn all the best tips for dating profiles and hear directly from industry pros.

SPEAKER BIOS

Julie Spira – CEO and Founder, Cyber-Dating Expert

Julie Spira is the CEO and founder of Cyber-Dating Expert, an online dating coaching, advice and consulting business in the dating industry. As an early adopter of Internet dating and online dating expert, Julie has been coaching singles for over two decades on finding love. Her dating advice has been featured in over 1000 media stories and she’s the author of the bestseller, “The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online,” which was re-released this year on Audible, where she narrated audio book version. Julie is the creator of “Mobile Dating BootCamp” and “Online Dating BootCamp.” Julie graduated from the Park School of Communications at Ithaca College, where she received a B.S. in Television-Radio. She started her career in broadcasting as a media personality. Always on the leading edge of technology, become the first female executive at RKO Radio Networks, the country’s first digitally delivered satellite radio network. She ranks as the most influential person in “dating” and “online dating” on social media influence site, Klout.

Site: CyberDatingExpert.com Twitter @JulieSpira

Talia Goldstein – CEO and Founder, Three Day Rule

Talia Goldstein is the CEO and founder of Three Day Rule. After studying communication at Tulane University, Talia worked as a TV producer at E! True Hollywood Story, where she quickly became the office dating expert, setting up many co-workers with matches and handing out insightful dating advice from her cubicle. Recognizing her hidden talent for matchmaking, Talia quit her full-time job and began hosting popular singles events and offering personalized matchmaking services. Three Day Rule was officially created in 2013, allowing Talia to turn her lifelong hobby of matchmaking into a thriving business. Leveraging her extensive network of successful, attractive singles, Talia has found matches for hundreds of clients, including top executives, entrepreneurs, and everyday young professionals. Among her clients, Talia has been recognized for her strong instinct for what drives lifelong connections between two people. She has made it her mission to help clients on their quest to find true love, and is thrilled that her work allows her to make a difference in people’s lives.

Web: ThreeDayRule.com Twitter: @TaliaGoldstein @ThreeDayRule

Kelly Steckelberg – CEO, Zoosk

Kelly Steckelberg is the Chief Executive Officer (CEO) at Zoosk. Kelly joined Zoosk in March 2011 from Cisco, where she held various roles including divisional CFO positions for the Consumer Segment and WebEx. Kelly joined Cisco through the WebEx acquisition, where she served as Controller, Chief Accounting Officer (CAO). Prior to WebEx, Kelly held executive positions with Epiphany, Inc. and a variety of finance positions at PeopleSoft, Inc. in the U.S. and Europe. She started her career at KPMG in both tax and audit. Kelly holds both a bachelor’s and master’s degree in accounting from the University of Texas at Austin.  In addition to her work at Zoosk, Kelly also serves on the board of Episcopal Community Services of San Francisco (ECS), which helps provides housing, jobs, shelter, and essential services to homeless and low-income people in San Francisco. When not working, she loves to travel and has been to over 60 countries.

Web: Zoosk.com Twitter @ksteckel @zoosk

Jennifer Kelton – CEO and Founder, BOD Dating App

Jennifer Kelton is a dating industry expert and Founder & CEO of the recently launched bod (Bad Online Dates) app. She is also author of the acclaimed dating book, Don’t Use My Sweater like a Towel and creator of dressforthedate.com.  The bod (Bad Online Dates) app is a geo-location-based dating app where users can move on from a bad date and potentially meet someone new, in real-time.

Web: boddatingapp.com  Twitter: @BadOnlineDates

Bod Mobile App Helps You Ditch a Bad Date to Find a New One

There are plenty of mobile dating apps these days, but have you ever dreaded going out on a date with someone new who you met online, wondering if you’d recognize them? Have you ever gone on a date and found the other person’s grammar or hygiene habits so repulsive you want to run out the door?

We know that not all dates are disastrous, but every once in a while you need to be saved from a date that’s gone south in a digital heartbeat.

Cyber-Dating Expert friend Jennifer Kelton from Bad Online Dates has come up with a solution to help yo find your Knight in white armor and to say goodbye to the dud IRL.

Jennifer told me that she created the bod App because she feels that “there is a problem in the dating space and more people are having bad dates than having good dates.”

Related: Why Grammar Matters in Dating

Sure we know that dating is a numbers game.

With the newly launched location-based bod app, you can open it up and see on a map another potential dater who might want to meet you and save the day. Jennifer calls it the Plan B to bad dates.

Jen feels that the dating industry has a responsibility to help singles make the best use of their time, money, and energy, (not to say the cost of the blow-out, new outfit, manicure, pedicure, flowers, etc.)

Here’s a Peek on How the bod Dating App Works

1. Go to the App Store or Google Play (iPhone or Android), download, and log in through your email or Facebook account
2. Set up your profile and turn on Date Mode to start looking for people around you to connect with in real time
3. When Date Mode is on, users become discoverable and visible to other local app users, even those not currently on a bad date.
4. Message matches to meet (and leave your date!)

Once a mutual interest is established, users receive a notification and now have an escape plan to get out of their date and start a new (and hopefully good) date.

Related: 20 Flirty Texts to Capture His Heart

How is bod different from other apps?

Other mobile dating apps, like Happn, Tinder, and Bumble, are designed to help you meet someone and go on a first date. bod App changes the dating app game by helping you get out of that first Tinder date if it goes south and offers you the opportunity to salvage your night (and your outfit) and have a better time.

Icebreakers to get your started

If you’re on the shy side and can’t figure out a good opening line, the bod App has built in icebreakers that you can send to your matches. Basically they act as your own personal digital wingman and take you past “hey.”

Some examples of icebreakers include:

1. Talking in public on your phone a do or a don’t?
2. How often do you see live music?
3. Do you like white or red wine?
4. On a plane do you like the window or an aisle seat?
5. Were you a boy scout or a girl scout?

Do download the app on iOs or Android visit boddatingapp.com

Follow @JulieSpira on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook.

Sign up for the FREE Cyber-Dating Expert Weekly Flirt to get dating advice delivered to your inbox.

How Digital is Your Love Life?

Online dating doesn’t mean just signing up for a dating site when you’re single any more. It’s a multi-billion dollar industry filled with mobile apps, dating coaches, and helps both singles find love and couples stay together with ongoing dating tips.

In a pre-Valentine’s Love Goes Digital panel hosted by Kevin Winston of Digital LA, online dating experts and sites discussed dating advice, the growing trend of mobile dating, and how to keep your love alive after the knot has been tied.

Grant Langston, head of social media at eHarmony and an employee of the site since before it’s launch in 2000 shared his experience on the changes their site has gone through. In my personal opinion, I think they have one of the best iPad apps around. The site will shortly be rolling out a new feature for your eHarmony timeline that’s similar to a? Facebook time-line.

Justin Fredericks, founder of Marriage.com, a video network that curates, produces and promotes videos about wedding, marriage, dating, and relationships talked about the new social networking site Pinterest, as it focuses on women.

Jennifer Kelton from Bad Online Dates talked about her mobile strategy, Bad Date TV, and some niche online dating sites.

I shared with the audience how I created my first online dating profile in 1994 as a charter member of Love@Aol, during the days of the dial-up connection. I penned my stories in my first book, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online and created CyberDatingExpert.com as a place for singles and couples to share their online dating stories. The use of social media on Twitter and Facebook has made a big impact on my brand. I also told singles not to ‘friend’ someone on Facebook before or after a first date. Personally, I think it’s creepy.

The audience was a mixed group of singles, married couples, dating industry executives, love coaches and those who are still looking for love online. We nibbled on chocolate, sipped One Coconut Water, and discussed what you should say or not say in your online dating profile.

At the end of the digital day, most of the audience felt they’d rather keep their love and dating life off of Facebook.

One thing’s for sure. The audience left fully armed with the dos and don’ts of social and online dating in time for Valentine’s Day.

Julie Spira is an online dating expert and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com. She creates irresistible profiles for singles on the dating scene. Follow her @JulieSpira on Twitter. If you loved this post, Like us at Facebook.com/CyberDatingExpert for more dating advice.

Peril of the Week – The Bad Date

What makes a date a bad date?

If you ask my friend and neighbor, ?Jennifer Kelton, she’ll point you to her terrific site?Bad Online Dates. On her site, you can post those dates you had hoped would go well, that ended in the category of a dating disaster. At Cyber-Dating Expert, we feature the Peril of the Week. This time, I thought I’d add in a personal story of my own, along with some dating advice to prevent you from ending up with a date gone bad.

Forgive my bad manners, but during my last bad online date, I sent a text message to Jen saying, ?Help! I?m on a bad date, but don?t tell anyone.? I received an immediate supportive response from Jen, which said, ?I just laughed so hard out loud right now! Are you ok? Other than the fact that you?re on a ?bad date.???She offered to help me with the ?family emergency? call and she let me know that she was there for me.??There?s nothing more powerful than your girlfriend network while you are going on a blind date.

Jen coined the phrase bad dates. She produces and directs Bad Date TV. I have a history of writing about my dates, both the good and the bad.
So what exactly defines a bad date and how do you prevent one from happening?

Let?s look at some ways to prevent yourself from a dating disaster so you don’t end up as the Peril of the Week.

1. Trust Your Intuition.?Don?t accept a date when the phone conversation doesn?t feel right. If you don?t have any phone chemistry at all or find yourself in an argument with your date before you even meet them, don?t schedule a date. You don?t need a free meal. If you put a date on the calendar, don?t feel badly about canceling. Why waste each other?s time?

My first conversation with my date was awful. We had two weeks of fantastic instant messaging chemistry.??On the phone, he kept interrupting me, arguing with me, and kept telling me how to run my business life, disagreeing with everything I was doing. He was right. I was wrong about everything, so it appeared. I couldn?t get off the phone fast enough. I should have canceled our upcoming date, but felt I was a woman of my word and should follow through. I needed to give him the benefit of the doubt. A woman?s intuition is very powerful. You should trust it. I ended up going for sushi with a man who attacked every statement I made. From arguing with me because I didn’t like to eat eel, to ridiculing me because I ordered hot sake. He insisted that cold sake was better. When I said I liked living near the beach, he complained about the fog layer. It went downhill fast. I wondered, ? Why did I subject myself to this??

2.?Take your date from online to offline as soon as possible. In my case, I had great ?instant message? chemistry with the date in question.??Since I had communicated with him mostly online, ?I broke several of my own rules of netiquette for online daters. I had a good excuse. I had laryngitis.

My date made several attempts to call and get together. I was unable to, but as he was supportive of my voiceless condition, including suggesting a Dr. who could help me, I began to feel more comfortable with this man whom I never met.

If you spend too much time online sending instant messages, ?text messages, and emails to someone, you can end up with a false illusion that you are in a relationship. You start to get attached. You are not in a relationship. You are talking to a computer with a photo, that?s all.

3. Never ever text message others while on a date (unless you want your date to end.) I always say, keep the BlackBerry and iPhone off the table. It?s not an accessory. It?s rude and sends a message that you are more interested in someone else other than your date. In this case, I didn?t care that I sent Jen a text. She needed to know. I knew I?d get sympathy from a friend who understood. I believe you should always check in with a friend when you are meeting a date for the first time. I call it the buddy system. If I was really that into him, I wouldn?t notice my cell phone, even if it rang.

4. Always meet your date in a public place and don?t drive together. When my date suggested picking me up at my home and driving for 45 minutes together on what he called a ?real date,? I knew enough to say no. I sent him a text that said I always meet someone on a first date and take my own car. If I had been stuck in a car with a controlling argumentative guy, it could have been a problem. I might have ended up on a street corner alone, looking for a cab back home. Better safe, than sorry.

5. Do your homework and study for the quiz. Online dating is a numbers game. However, the more organized you are, the more successful your date will be. In this case, my date thought I had never been married, forgot that I was from the east coast, didn?t remember what I did for a living, and didn?t really seem to care.??If you are on a date, make it personal and keep it light. Take the time to remember something your date wrote in their profile. Think of it like preparing for a job interview for your dream job. Would know the name of the parent company you are interviewing with? Would you know the name of the CEO or city of their headquarters? Did you find out how man years they were in business? Recognize their logo?

Add it all up, and it was a recipe for disaster, before I even arrived at the sushi bar to meet a 50-year old man who was wearing a dangling earring. ?It was destined to be a bad date.

So before you go on your next date, make sure you are looking forward to it, be on good behavior, do your homework, ask questions about the other person, take time to listen, and perhaps you?ll make a new friend, even if you don?t end up meeting ?the one.?

Julie Spira is a dating advice columnist and online dating expert. She is the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online. Visit her at CyberDatingExpert.com

Ask the Cyber-Cyber-Dating Expert? Radio Show with Jennifer Kelton

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Most everyone who has tried online ?dating has experienced that bad online date that made you wonder, should you try it again? Join Cyber-Dating Expert, Julie Spira with her very special guest, Jennifer Kelton, The Dating Advisor and founder of BadOnlineDates.com.

Listen to the show and hear dating tips on how not to “blow it” when you meet someone you like and tips for successful online dating.

Ask the Cyber-Cyber-Dating Expert? Radio Show

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Join Cyber-Dating Expert and author Julie Spira as she welcomes as her guest, Jennifer Kelton on this week’s Ask the Cyber-Dating Expert radio show.

Jennifer Kelton, The Dating Advisor and Founder & CEO of BadOnlineDates.com, has more than 30 years of experience in the dating scene with all its wonder, joy, and horror. Her array of challenging experiences inspired her to write a book, Don’t Use My Sweater Like a Towel, develop several Web sites to help people connect with?each other and unravel the mysteries of dating, and even create a new online TV series? called Bad Date TV about archetypal bad daters.

In this week’s show she will not only talk about ?bad dates? but also how to sort out the secrets for Internet dating success,while looking for love online. Call in at 11am, pacific time on Saturday, April 11th at 646-929-0012 or log onto www.blogtalkradio.com/CyberDatingExpert to send in your questions on the live webchat. It’ going to be a fun show!